


The Results of Yesterday

by TheFirstKilljoy



Category: Bandom, My Chemical Romance
Genre: Abuse, Abusive Relationships, Brothers, Cancer, Child Abuse, Drug-Induced Sex, Emotional Manipulation, Falling In Love, First Love, Foursome - M/M/M/M, Friendship/Love, Hooker!Gerard - Freeform, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Light Dom/sub, Little Mikey Way, Loss, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Mentions of Cancer, Prostitute Gerard Way, Rape, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rough Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Sacrifice, Sexual Abuse, Starvation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-13
Updated: 2018-02-08
Packaged: 2018-03-22 18:38:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 40
Words: 128,839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3739207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheFirstKilljoy/pseuds/TheFirstKilljoy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gerard's a prostitute who is responsible for his little brother Mikey who has been plagued with cancer for most of his life. Afraid of losing his brother, Gerard is desperately trying to secure himself a wealthy boyfriend. Often sacrificing his needs and wants for his little brother's. </p><p>Gerard is just trying to take each day as it comes and to keep Mikey safe and healthy. Gerard knows that he would do anything to keep Mikey's happiness, even give up on his own.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I'm sorry that the summary for this sucks, I will tweek it little later but I wanted to post this for you guys. 
> 
> I hope you like! Please leave me your thoughts!

Gerard was bending down over the chair of his vanity, well if you would call it that, it was more like a beaten up desk with a cracked mirror propped up against the wall. He was carefully smearing eyeshadow onto his eyelid with his finger before he blinked and looked at his deep hazel eyes and did his best to ignore how badly they lacked any form of life in them.

“So you know not to answer the door to anyone,” Gerard mumbled mindlessly as he went over to his drawers and pulled out a pair of his tightest jeans. He held them up and looked at them for a moment before he turned to face his little brother on the bed.

“Yes, Gerard,” Mikey said with a drone like voice but he was smiling. His older brother did this everytime he left for the night. Mikey wondered if it was because of the neighborhood they lived in. Sometimes he could hear people yelling at each other or what sounded like a gunshot but they were a lot louder than the ones he heard on TV.

“I made you chicken nuggets and fries, the plate’s in the microwave,” Gerard continued to mindlessly talk as he got his pants on, he then began digging for a shirt. He raked his fingers through his hair and breathed out before he glanced to his brother. 

Mikey was ten and he was sick. Leukemia had entered his little body at three and had only continued to plague him. He was in remission, had been for six months but Gerard feared everyday that the cancer would come back, like it had before. He heard his little brother cough and noted he had to pick up Mikey’s prescription as soon as he could. His immune system was horrible now and he was constantly getting sick or throwing up. That was the hardest, when Gerard couldn’t get him to keep anything down, it left him feeling so uneasy. 

Mikey tried not to scrunch up his face and only did it when his brother was back to. His whole life seemed to be macaroni and cheese or chicken nuggets and fries. Really, it was mostly anything microwave friendly, and he was growing a little tired of frozen foods but he kept it to himself because he knew his brother was trying. 

“I shouldn’t be gone too late tonight. You can call me on my cell if you need me,” Gerard pulled his shirt down over his chest and fixed it as he looked at himself in the mirror. He turned side to side looking over how it fit him. 

“The phone’s shut off again,” Mikey mumbled quietly. He hated mentioning things like bills to Gerard, he saw how upset he got when he was slumped over the table with the envelopes in hand and splayed out, the bright red stamps of _‘Final Notice’_ written on most of them. 

“Shit,” Gerard hissed and rubbed at his eyes. “So the TV’s been off?” He turned and looked to Mikey as he tried to button the wrist of his shirt up. Mikey nodded his head weakly. “How longs it been off?” 

Mikey thought it over in his head, he wasn’t sure. It had been a while because he knew he’d missed the new episodes of his shows twice already. “Two weeks,” he guessed and looked to Gerard with a crooked face.

“Baby, why didn’t you tell me?” Gerard sighed a little and went to get his phone. He’d been leaving Mikey home alone without a phone, that made his insides crawl. It also didn’t help that when Mikey was home alone, all he had to do was watch TV and that had been off. Gerard knew the old DVD player in the living room didn’t work. 

He stood by his beat up dresser and listened to the automated billing voice go through the rounds on his phone. He clicked the number he needed and waited before the voice came again. “Your total is four hundred fifty-three dollars and sixty-four cents. Would you like to pay this all?”

Gerard’s breath had hitched a little so he had to clear his throat before he spoke again. “No,” he said quietly and hung his head as she continued to tell him the lowest balance he could pay, half of the bill. He agreed to it and gave her his card number but cringed when she thanked him in her robot voice and said goodbye. 

“There we go. All settled,” Gerard said to Mikey with a smile before he went back to trying to button his wrist. He got frustrated with it and mumbled a quiet curse that he hoped Mikey didn’t hear.

Mikey quietly came over and buttoned it for Gerard before he leaned up and hugged his big brother. “I love you,” he said tenderly and nuzzled his face into Gerard’s chest. He appreciated his big brother more than anything. When their parents had died, the state had came to take him away but Gerard had managed to keep him, Mikey loved him for it. 

“I love you too,” Gerard whispered softly and hugged Mikey close to him, gripping him tightly. His hand came up and gently rubbed over the fabric of the hat, that covered Mikey’s head. He held his brother for a little while but then there was a knock on the front door. “Oh, that’s him,” Gerard said and pulled away quickly. He went over and primped himself in the mirror a little more. 

“Make sure to eat your dinner. Don’t open the door for strangers. Don’t answer the phone unless it says its me and bed by nine,” Gerard mumbled as he walked into the hall, pulling on his jacket. He used his hand to pop his hair out of the collar of his coat as he turned to his little brother.

“Ten,” Mikey piped and smiled because he knew like always that he’d get his way. 

“Fine, ten,” Gerard rolled his eyes back but smiled. “I’ll see you in the morning,” he whispered before he kissed the top of Mikey’s head and gave him a quick hug.

“Be safe, Gee,” Mikey said quietly and he let his head lay on his brothers shoulder for a moment and breathed him in. Mikey didn’t know what Gerard did when he went out but he knew sometimes he came home hurt and he would have bruises on his face or body. 

“I will, baby. Always,” Gerard whispered and kissed his little brothers cheek, looking to him for a moment before their was another knock on the door. “Alright,” he whispered before he stood up properly, no longer leaning down to Mikey. 

Mikey went and hid in his room when Gerard went to open the door. He normally did this because Gerard asked him to. He could hear faint talking, some guy was here to pick Gerard up again. Mikey just waited quietly and when he heard Gerard shut the door he came out of his little room and went to the kitchen. 

Mikey grimaced when he pulled the chicken nuggets and fries from the microwave but brought them over to the living room where he set them on the rickety coffee table before he clicked on the TV and happily started watching one of his shows.

* * *

Gerard was pressed up against the door of his house as hands groped at his hips and there was a hot mouth pushed up against his neck. He panted softly out of his swollen, red lips and gripped the collar of the man’s shirt.

They had gone out on their date and things had gone alright. The guy was named David, he had loads of money, which had only been proven by his car and designer suit. He had taste, that was something Gerard knew for sure. 

“You wanna come in?” Gerard purred and the man pulled his mouth from his neck and nodded to him before he pressed their swollen lips together in a wet kiss. Gerard turned to put the key in and unlocked the door, he felt hands running over his hips and ass in his tight jeans. He knew Mikey was in bed by now because it was almost midnight, they were safe to go in. The second the door was open the guy was pushing him in and kissing him again. 

They kept moving their mouths together and the man began to push Gerard back onto the couch. “Hey, why don’t we go to my room?” Gerard whispered as he ran his hand over the mans chest. His eyes were on the hall where Mikey’s bedroom door was cracked open, he didn’t want him to hear. 

“Too far,” the man mumbled mindlessly as he fumbled with Gerard’s long laces that ran up his boots. “Fuckin’,” the man cursed as he pulled on them and only managed to tightened them further. 

Gerard leaned up and quickly untied them before he pushed them off the couch and ran his fingers through his messed up hair. “The beds more comfy,” Gerard tried again, forcing a sexy smirk to cover his face. 

“That’s okay,” the man breathed and flipped Gerard onto his stomach before he began pulling off Gerard’s jeans. Gerard managed to get the condom out of the pocket of them before they were out of reach. 

He flipped himself back over and purred to the man, “Let me taste you.” He leaned his head down and pushed the man’s designer boxers down, everything about him screamed money it seemed. He lapped at the mans tip before he began sucking on him and pumping the shaft. He worked the man up before he put the condom on him and spat on it. He smeared it over the condom before he leaned back. He took his shirt off and tossed it on the floor before he laid back and pulled his legs up for the man. 

“Yeah, you’re so hot,” the man mindlessly said before he spat down on Gerard’s hole and rubbed his fingers over it. Gerard’s breath picked up a little and he twitched a little when the mans finger pushed into him to the first knuckle. “You need some prep, babe?” The man was kissing at Gerard’s neck again and Gerard arched into the man’s mouth before he shook his head. 

The man made a content noise and Gerard bit his lip as the man pushed in. It stung a bit but he didn’t want the man to get irritated with prepping him. If truth be told, Gerard didn’t want to sleep with the man above him. He was arrogant, showy, and a bit rude but he knew it was for the best. If he could get this guy to take care of him, then he could slowly get the guy to take care of Mikey. He couldn’t afford it on his own, he was drowning, and he had to trick someone into helping him, even though it made him feel so low inside. 

“Tight,” the man mouthed against Gerard’s ear and began rocking his hips into Gerard who tried to angle his hips a little better for the man. It was like he’d never done this before, his thrusts were too quick to start and just random jabs. 

Gerard turned his head to the side and looked to the mans hand that was gripping his shoulder. He spotted it, the man's ring finger had lighter skin where a wedding band should be, Gerard just swallowed. He tried to tell himself that the man could have just gotten divorced because he was attracted to men. 

Gerard tried angling his hips so the man would hit his prostate and so he could at least enjoy it but the man kept grabbing his hips and putting him back. When Gerard got persistent the man pulled out and rolled Gerard onto his stomach before he pushed back in and began fucking Gerard into the couch. 

Gerard panted a little, in this position the guy was so close to his prostate but he just wasn’t hitting it. Gerard rested his forehead down on the couch and instantly regretted it because all he could smell was Mikey. He lifted his head back up and turned it away. 

“I’m close,” the man breathed against Gerard’s neck who only nodded like he was too. He planned on faking it, then he could get another date with the man. 

Gerard was so concentrated on faking it that when he opened his eyes a few moments later he finally saw the light coming from the hallway, the bathroom light was on. His heart stopped and he instantly stopped his noises as the couch still creaked, he then heard loud retching. 

“What the fuck!?” The guy shouted and pulled back, falling from Gerard’s red, gaping hole. Gerard shot up instantly and found his boxers and shirt, pulling them on before he went down the hall. 

Mikey was on the floor in the bathroom, kneeling in front of the toilet as his body shook from his harsh vomiting. Gerard instantly knelt down beside Mikey and rubbed his back. “You’re burning up, baby,” Gerard said and he instantly felt horrible for his little brother. 

He stood up and filled the small cup by the sink with water before he grabbed a cloth from the side of the sink and ran it under the cool water. “Here we go,” he cooed to Mikey and gently draped the wet cloth over the back of his neck before he handed him the water. “Sip this,” he whispered and gently brushed Mikey’s cheek. 

“You have a kid?!” Gerard’s head turned to see David standing in the doorway of the bathroom. Gerard shook his head but before he could talk to him, the man was walking back to the living room. 

“Hey, it’s fine. He’s just my brother, he’ll go back to sleep,” Gerard said as he came down the hall and tried to look seductive even though he was panicking. 

“B-Brother!?” David spat and quickly started pulling on his pants, covering his now softening cock that still had the condom on it. “Are your parents here!?” Gerard saw panic jump into David’s face now. 

“No!” Gerard tried and gently grabbed for David’s hand but it was slapped away. “It’s no big deal,” Gerard tried again as he followed David to the door but the man went through it and slammed it behind him. “Fuck,” Gerard sighed and brought his hands to his face, rubbing his eyes. 

“I-I’m sorry, Gee,” Gerard turned to the tiny voice that was behind him and saw Mikey standing in the hall, looking down at the floor. 

“It’s okay,” Gerard whispered reassuringly. “Come on, you can come sleep with me tonight,” he said with a soft smile and grabbed Mikey up under his armpits and hoisted him to his chest. Mikey wrapped his little legs and arms around his big brother and nuzzled closer to him. 

Gerard got Mikey into his bed and covered him up before he went over to his vanity, looking at his wrecked makeup and messed up hair in his cracked mirror. He looked down and since he knew Mikey couldn’t see his face well in the dark room he let himself cry. 

He hated crying, with a passion. He always felt so weak when he did it but everything was so confusing right now and he was so scared about everything. He needed help with Mikey, he was tired of going out on these dates with horrible men he hated, and he was tired of selling himself on the street corner to keep up with bills and Mikey’s medications. It all came back to money, money was ruining his whole being. 

He wiped his eyes discreetly, using a baby wipe to do so. He used baby wipes to remove his makeup, they were a lot cheaper, and worked the same if not better. He finished getting his makeup off before he turned and crawled into bed with his little brother, pulling him close and tight.

“Gee?” Mikey squeaked and Gerard hummed softly and pressed his nose to Mikey’s soft cap. “Are we going to be okay?” 

Gerard closed his eyes as he felt tears fill them again and he fought every urge he had to not let his voice shake. “Yeah, baby. We’re fine,” he lied and nuzzled Mikey closely. “Nothing bad will ever happen,” he whispered. 

“Okay. I love you,” Mikey whispered and buried his face into his brother and the cheap, thin sheets that covered the mattress. 

“I love you too,” Gerard breathed back and ran his hand up and down Mikey’s back. 

When Mikey finally fell asleep Gerard just gripped him close and cried. He didn’t know what they were going to do but he didn’t want to lose his brother, he loved him too much. Gerard was scared what the state might do to him at the end of the year. Mikey had been too sick to do a lot of his school the last year. So when school started again, they told Gerard he would have to pay for a few special classes for Mikey to catch up. Gerard had been unable to afford it so he had kept Mikey home and claimed he was homeschooling him. Now he was wondering what he was going to do next year when Mikey would be two years behind.

It was bad enough that he had dropped out in the tenth grade, at the age of sixteen, to raise his little brother. Now being eighteen he had no clue what to do with his life or how to make it better.

Gerard held his little brother and could only cry, his whole life was messed up, and there was nothing he could do about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm sorry that the summary for this sucks, I will tweek it little later but I wanted to post this for you guys. 
> 
> I hope you like! Please leave me your thoughts!


	2. Chapter 2

“Three hundred fifty-three dollars,” the woman behind the register droned and Gerard nervously reached into his back pocket for his wallet. He leafed out the proper amount of money and saw it left him with about ten dollars. “Have a nice day,” the woman said blandly as she handed him the multiple bags with prescriptions in them. 

“You too,” Gerard said sadly and walked from the pharmacy going out into the rain. He tucked the bags of Mikey’s pills under his arm in his jacket as he began to walk home. He didn’t bother holding up his collar or trying to protect himself with his jacket. He was going to get wet one way or another, he didn’t much feel like fighting the inevitable, he did that enough. 

As he began his walk home Gerard felt someone bump into him and turned a little to see the person look back at him. “Hey, I’m sorry,” the man smiled but had turned fully around to look at Gerard now. 

Gerard didn’t feel up for a lot of conversation but he needed to find another prospect to take care of Mikey and this man was wearing a suit, had good hair, teeth, and looks. “Hi,” Gerard said with what he hoped was a cute smile. “You’re fine, it was my fault, really.” 

“No, I wasn’t looking where I was going,” the man smiled and ran his fingers through his soaked hair. “I’m Damien,” the man offered his hand to Gerard and he took it. 

“I’m Gerard,” he smiled as the man held his hand a little longer than normal. “It’s not often I get to bump into someone quite as good looking as you,” Gerard shot out. He knew he didn’t have time to play coy, it was raining so hard that it was dripping down his collar and running down his spine. He didn’t want to miss this opportunity but he also didn’t want to be entirely drenched, he was halfway there already. 

Damien smiled back for a moment before he breathed through his nose. “Would you like to go out? Tonight?” Damien leaned a little closer since it was pouring harder now. 

Gerard bit his lip, he really had to work the corner tonight. He had ten dollars to his name and the electric bill was due tomorrow and Mikey had a doctors appointment with a fifty dollar copay. He just didn’t want this guy thinking he wasn’t interested in him. 

“Tonight sounds great,” Gerard lied but smiled shyly. He was scanning the man for any signs of him being a lying asshole with a wife and three kids but there wasn’t one, this could actually work for Gerard. “Here, I’ll give you my number. Call me with a time?”

“Sounds good,” Damien said before he took Gerard’s number and put it in his phone. “I’ll call you,” he grinned and Gerard smiled back and nodded.

* * *

“Mikey?! Mikey, I’m home,” Gerard called when he came through the door. He shrugged off his soaked jacket and threw his keys onto the countertop. “Come take your pills,” Gerard hollered down the hallway as he started taking them out of their bags and setting them on the stained counters. 

He took down Mikey’s daily pill divider and began putting the pills inside each day. He did this because it was just easier to keep track of the different meds that Mikey had to have on different days. 

“Mikey,” Gerard called as he stood at the end of the little hallway. There was silence and Gerard instantly felt panic rise in his throat but he swallowed it down and forced himself down the little hall. 

The bathroom was empty and so was Mikey’s bedroom. He walked to the last door and pushed it open, he found Mikey curled up on his bed hugging onto his pillow. “Mikey,” Gerard whispered and came over to him. Mikey didn’t stir and Gerard was feeling his heart rate pick up. 

He leaned down and gently felt for Mikey’s pulse, he sighed out his fear when he felt it against his fingertips. Though, Mikey was hot to the touch, and when Gerard draped his hand over Mikey’s forehead he knew Mikey must have a fever. 

He went down the hall and got Mikey his pills and some of the special cold medicine Mikey had to have. The doctor had prescribed it because a lot of the meds that Mikey took couldn’t be mixed with other cold medicines. Gerard bit his lip, he didn’t want to have to buy more of the pills, they were about fifty dollars a bottle. 

He filled up one of Mikey’s plastic cups with water and went down the hall to his room. “Mikey,” Gerard said quietly and gently nudged his little brother’s shoulder. “Wake up, baby,” he whispered and Mikey stirred a little and tiredly rolled back to look at Gerard, he gently fisted at one of his eyes and yawned. “I got your pills,” Gerard said quietly and handed them to Mikey who sat up a little straighter and then took them all slowly, one by one. “Why didn’t you tell me you didn’t feel good?” Gerard asked this with a frown as he carefully fixed Mikey’s hat that had gone crooked in his sleep. 

“I didn’t want you to worry,” Mikey said with a scrunched up frown. “I was hoping it would go away,” he confessed and sighed weakly. “Are you going out tonight?” Mikey looked up to his brother, genuinely curious. He hoped Gerard was going to stay home with him, he hated be alone when he was sick but he wouldn’t tell Gerard that. 

Gerard looked to Mikey for a minute as he thought of Damien. “No, buddy. I’ll be right here with you all night,” Gerard said with a soft smile. “How about I get us a pizza and we watch some Batman?” Gerard knew pizza probably wouldn’t be great for his cold but it was Mikey’s favorite and all Gerard could really afford, the cupboards were empty, so there wasn’t anything there to eat.

“Really?” Mikey asked excitedly and Gerard nodded. “Thank you, Gee,” Mikey squeaked and wrapped his frail arms around Gerard. 

Gerard smiled sadly and wrapped his arms around Mikey. It wasn’t often they got to spend time together and Mikey’s reaction was proof of that. Mikey was normally home alone for hours on end and that made Gerard feel guilty, it ate away at him.

* * *

Gerard ordered the pizza, got Mikey a grape soda, his favorite, and hunkered down with him on the couch. He had waited for Damien to call him, so he could tell him he couldn’t make it but he had never called. Gerard had tried to act like he wasn’t disappointed but it was easier to ignore with Mikey in his lap, eating hungrily through the pizza on the table. 

Gerard didn’t eat any of it because he knew it was Mikey’s favorite and he knew how hungry Mikey normally was. His stomach growled from the smell but he put Mikey’s eating before his own and it showed. When he was naked he could see his ribs stuck out a little and his hip bones jutted out more than most people's but no one ever mentioned it, so he ignored it. Plus, when he was dressed, it was easier to hide. 

Mikey was so engrossed by his Batman show and his pizza that he didn’t notice that his brother wasn’t eat and that was how Gerard wanted it. He wanted Mikey to be happy and for everything to seem perfect for his little brother. 

After a few hours of Batman and the whole medium sized pizza later, Mikey was out, and drooling on Gerard’s shoulder. The older brother didn’t move for a while though, he just held onto the little frame in his arms, and finished the episode of Batman they had been watching. 

When he saw it was almost midnight he picked up Mikey and carefully he carried him into his room where he laid him on the bed and covered him up. Mikey slept with him most night, Gerard felt more comfortable with Mikey close to him anyways. Furthermore, Mikey would have horrible dreams some nights that left him crying and coming into Gerard’s room. 

Gerard walked back out into the livingroom when he had Mikey covered up in the bedroom. He picked up Mikey’s empty soda can and the pizza box. Mikey hadn’t eaten all the crust from the pizza so Gerard plucked up a few of the pieces of crust and ate those before he threw out the box and went to lay down with Mikey. 

He sighed gently when he got into bed with his little brother. He had nothing to give Mikey for breakfast, all his cereal was gone, there was no milk. He wrack his brain, there was nothing in the fridge except a half used bottle of ketchup and mustard. He was trying to think if he had any of those cheap hot dogs left in the freezer, he couldn’t remember. As his mind wandered he forced himself to get back out of bed and go to the kitchen.

He opened up every cupboard and checked the fridge and freezer, there was literally nothing to eat. Gerard weakly sniffled before he forced his watering eyes to calm. “Okay,” he breathed out before he went into the bedroom, he quietly dressed himself in a skimpy skirt that he hid in the back of the closet, and a tight black shirt. He fixed his face and hair before he went to the front door and glanced back to Mikey’s slumped form that was laying in his bed. “I love you,” he whispered quietly to the sleeping form before he hung his head and walked out the door, heading down the road to the street corner.

* * *

“Morning,” Gerard said quietly to Mikey who was scuffing his feet as he walked down the hall. He yawned and his mouth opened widely, making Gerard tiredly smile. He had been out all night, trying to get enough money for groceries and the electric bill. He normally didn’t let customers on the street have intercorse with him but last night he had, knowing how badly he needed the money. It seemed like he needed money badly a lot more lately. He was sore from all the rough men taking him in dirty alleys or in the uncomfortable backseat of their cars. 

“Smells good,” Mikey mumbled tiredly and rubbed at his eyes. He was referring to the sausage and eggs that Gerard had frying in the pan. “Did you go shopping?” 

“Uh,” Gerard glanced to Mikey, “Yeah, I did. I got you some orange juice.” Gerard looked back to the pan in front of him. Mikey was getting older and he was noticing things he hadn’t before. This made Gerard nervous, he was scared one day his little brother would be smart enough to know that his older brother was trash that went out during the night to fuck dirty men for money. He bit his lip because he was honestly terrified that Mikey wouldn’t look up to him anymore and would be disgusted by him. 

“Thanks,” Mikey got out the big container and started pouring himself a glass of it before he put it back and then got his pills out of the cupboard. Gerard came over and placed his plate in front of him while he sipped them. Mikey was honestly surprised because Gerard hardly ever cooked, he wondered if something bad was happening. Usually Gerard only cooked when he had to tell Mikey something or when he was upset. 

Gerard sat across from him and just sipped water out of a coffee mug. The coffee pot had broken a few months back and Gerard figured it was just as well, coffee was expensive, on his budget. He looked up to the ceiling fan over them and was grateful to see the one grimy light bulb out of the trio was on. The other two had died months ago and Gerard just hadn’t bought more but regardless, he had paid the bill this morning on his way home from the store so Mikey wouldn’t have to wake up to no power. The woman behind the register had just looked at his rumpled clothing and hair, eyeing his skirt before rolling her eyes. He had changed into comfortable, baggy sweatpants when he got home.

“So are you going out tonight?” Mikey looked up to Gerard as he asked this. Chewing on his toast, he then glanced to the empty spot in front of Gerard. “Aren’t you going to eat?”

“Oh, uh, no I’m not hungry,” Gerard said and sipped his water. “I ate already,” he lied and Mikey just nodded. He felt bad lying to his little brother but it was better than the truth. _”No, I can’t eat because if I do you might starve or get sick because you can’t eat enough. Then the state will come and take you away from me and I’ll die, Mikey.”_ Gerard thought that over in his head and just agreed lying was better.

“But yes, I do have to go out tonight,” Gerard said quietly before he got up and started moving the now cooled pans into the sink and started washing them. 

“Okay,” Mikey squeaked as he continued to eat and just looked to his plate. “Will you be home late?” 

Gerard sighed, as Mikey got older the more he had to deal with these questions. He felt bombarded with them. He swallowed to wet his dry throat and just nodded his head to Mikey’s question, scrubbing harder at the pan in his hand. 

“Where are you going? Do you have a date?” Mikey asked and Gerard just slammed the pan down into the sink and Mikey flinched at the loud noise.

“I’m going to shower,” Gerard mumbled angrily as he walked down the hall and then slammed the door to the bathroom, he didn’t have to worry about breaking it, it already didn’t latch.

Mikey had jumped when the bathroom door had slammed and just looked down as his face felt warm. He felt bad now because he had clearly upset Gerard. He hadn’t meant to and he didn’t know what had caused Gerard’s anger but he knew it was his fault.

He left his plate more than half full and got up from his chair, padding quietly down the hall once the shower was running. He quietly went into his room and closed the door before he crawled under his bed and laid on a thin blanket that was under it. He sometimes slept there when Gerard wasn’t home and he was scared. Gerard always told him that if he thought someone was breaking in or trying to get in, to hide under the bed, it now felt like a safe place. 

Mikey squirmed a little when he heard the shower shut off and when he heard Gerard go to his own room he listened to the older boy move around as he dressed. Then Gerard went to the kitchen where Mikey had been and Mikey heard him let out a little whine sound and what sounded like a sob. 

Mikey slowly crawled out from under his bed before he timidly opened his door and stepped into the hall. He could hear Gerard crying in the kitchen and he slowly walked forward until he was at the end of the hall, between the kitchen and the living room. He saw Gerard with a hand to his face and the other on the table. 

Mikey cautiously walked up to his brother before he wrapped his arms around Gerard’s waist and rested his head against Gerard’s lower chest. He felt his brother tightly clutch him near and let out a tiny cry.

“Mikey, baby, I’m so sorry,” Gerard cried before he leaned down and pressed a kiss onto Mikey’s cap. “I didn’t mean to snap at you and jump you. I’m so sorry,” Gerard apologized again as he clutched his little brother to him. He had just been so tired and had gotten irritated and he felt so heavy for it now. 

“It’s okay, Gee. I promise,” Mikey said quietly and he leaned up on his tiptoes to kiss his older brothers cheek as he was being held in a death grip. “I love you,” Mikey quietly piped. 

“I love you too,” Gerard breath against the top of Mikey’s head before he sniffled loudly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is a bit late! Work and life have been crazy! 
> 
> (Also, please forgive any errors I didn't have time to look back over it! I will edit it soon!)
> 
> I hope you like it!


	3. Chapter 3

Gerard stood on the street corner and shivered as he was in his thin outfit, waiting for a car. It was slow tonight and he was grateful that it was so cold because it thinned out the other prostitutes. He had gloves on his hands but they only went up to his middle knuckle, leaving his fingertips cold. He rubbed his hands together and cupped them before he puffed hot air into the gap. 

Gerard decided to tuck his hands under his armpits and bounce in his spot a little as he looked up and down the street for any oncoming vehicles. As he looked down the street he saw a man handing out packages, that he had gotten from his stuffed messenger bag, to two of the female hookers. Gerard rolled his eyes as he figured this was some pimp just giving his girls their drugs. 

Gerard glanced up in the other directions and saw a few more of the prostitutes calling it a night and heading home. He knew they were just as cold as he was but he had to stay, Mikey had his appointment coming up and he had to start saving for rent, it was due in a few weeks. He felt his body start shaking and he couldn’t stop it as his teeth chattered loudly. 

“Hey,” Gerard jumped and turned to see the man with the messenger bag standing beside him. The man was a little shorter than he was, with brown hair that was cut short, and eyes to match his hair. Gerard just kind of looked to the man and raised an eyebrow as if asking what he wanted. “I was just making my rounds, you look new,” the man said as he had his hands in his jacket pockets. His jacket looked warm and thick, Gerard had half a mind to knock the man out so he could steal it.

Gerard just nodded sheepishly before he hid his nose down into where his scarf was, he knew the tip of it was probably bright red. He wasn’t new to selling himself but he was new to the area this corner was in. The last corner he had worked at had been too slow. He rocked a little in his spot as he felt his body going numb. 

“You need any condoms or anything?” The man asked and reached into his bag, pulling up the flap. Gerard nodded as he felt his face warm a little but he enjoyed it since his face was so numb and cold. Gerard figured the guy must be from the church or one of the volunteer shelters. “Clean needles?” The guy had the condoms in one hand and held a needle in the other hand, perfectly packaged. Gerard shook his head to the needle and the man put it back, Gerard was grateful, he didn’t want to look at it any longer. “Here you go,” the man said quietly as he handed them to Gerard.

“Thank you,” Gerard quietly piped as he took them and put them in his pocket. He had been out for a while and had been turned down by a few cars for not having one. He sometimes had to sleep with customers without condoms. He knew it was disgusting and not safe but it was for his brother. He had to feed Mikey and pay for his prescriptions and his appointments. He felt disgusting whenever he let a man finish inside him but he just learned to accept it.

“Here,” the man said again and Gerard saw the man holding something that looked like two little pouches. He held out of his hand and when the man gave it to him he made a very content noise when he realized they were hand warmers. 

“Thank you,” Gerard said again and buried his hands into his pocket with the new warmth clutched tightly. He curled up into himself a little as he continued to bounce. 

“You need something to eat?” The man pulled out a sandwich from his bag and a water bottle. He was still looking into his bag when he felt the sandwich being ripped from his hand and turned to see the younger boy rip off the plastic before he nearly devoured an entire half in one bite. 

Gerard didn’t care what he was eating at the moment, he was starving. He had hardly eaten anything all week and the sandwich tasted like the best thing ever no matter what it was, Gerard was eating it too fast to even tell. 

“Here,” the man said quietly and handed Gerard the water bottle. Gerard took it with another nod of his appreciation. “Don’t stay out here too long, okay? You’ll freeze,” the man said with a final bow of his head before he began to walk off. 

Gerard was trying to chew his sandwich faster so that he could ask the man his name but he had taken too big of a bite and the man had already crossed the street and walked a little ways further. He was now talking to two other male prostitutes and handing them condoms, needles, food, and hand warmers. He gave them both the same warning as he had Gerard, to go home and get warm as soon as they could. 

Gerard slowly chewed the second half of his sandwich and when he glanced up again, the man was gone. He shook so badly after he had eaten, the wind was picking up, and it was whipping icy air into Gerard’s face. The month of October was always chilly in New Jersey and it only reminded Gerard of the months to come where he would be standing in the snow, freezing to death, waiting for a car.

Gerard was about to call it a night when a man pulled up to the corner and rolled down his window. “Hey,” Gerard said with a little smile as he looked into the car. The man was overweight and Gerard could already smell body odor and stale cigarettes from where he stood. 

“How much?” The man harped from inside the car and nodded towards Gerard with his head. Gerard bent down a little further to talk to the man when he noticed him glancing at his ass. 

“Twenty-five for a blowjob, fifty for a quicky in your car or the alley, two fifty for the whole night,” Gerard said and tried to look as attractive as possible even though his teeth threatened to chatter every second he stood smiling. 

“Alright, get in,” the man reached over and pushed open Gerard’s door before he leaned back over into his own seat. Gerard sighed when he stood up, knowing the man couldn’t hear him, before he got himself into the car. 

Even though the car and it’s owner smelt, there was heat, and that was nearly payment enough. The man drove a few blocks away and as he drove he had reached over and started fondling Gerard’s cock through the panties he had on under his skirt. Gerard was squirming a little before the man pulled into an alley and undid his own pants. He pushed them down and revealed his short, chubby, little cock and Gerard knew it’d be an easy ride. 

Gerard carefully kneeled in his seat as he slipped his panties down over one boot and just let them bunch up on his right thigh. He carefully swung his leg over the mans and situated himself above the guy before he reached into his jacket pocket and took out one of the condoms he had gotten from the man on the street. He smiled a little at the fact that it was pre-lubed. He rolled the condom down over the mans small cock before he leaned down and spat on it, stroking it for effect. 

The man moaned and Gerard slowly wiggled his hips forward and raised them before he pushed the mans tip against his hole and made a tiny noise as he sunk down on the mans cock. 

“Take off your jacket,” the man ordered and Gerard did, leaving him in nothing but a slutty little corset with his skirt up around his waist and his combat boots, his panties bunched up on his right thigh. 

Gerard made a tiny noise as his cock was pressed between him and the mans belly. He slowly started grinding and rocking his hips on the mans cock and moaned for the added effect. “Yeah, baby,” Gerard moaned before he forced himself to lean forward and share an open mouthed kiss with the man, trying not to grimace or pull away too soon. 

After a few moments Gerard had to shift a little when his thigh muscles started burning. He situated his feet on either side of the man and put his hands on the mans shoulders. He began bouncing his hips and actually fussed a little since the mans tip kept brushing at his spot. He tipped his head back because it was easier to enjoy when he could imagine this was someone else. This was someone who loved him, cherished him, who loved Mikey, who wanted nothing more than to take care of them and make sure they were okay.

The man leaned forward and started mouthing at one of Gerard’s nipples that had came out when the corset had slid downward. “Yeah, baby, yeah,” Gerard fussed and exaggerated the whine in his voice a little. “I’m gonna cum,” Gerard cried and bounced harder on the man, leaning further back to give him a better show and so he’d have more room in the cramped space. “You’re fucking me so good,” Gerard whimpered, even though he was doing all the work. 

The man grumbled against Gerard’s chest and wrapped his chubby fingers around Gerard’s hips, forcing him down harder. Gerard knew this meant the man was about to lose it, that and his eyes were closed like he was concentrating.

“Yeah, yeah,” Gerard fussed loudly and swirled his hips as he started fucking the man as hard and as fast as he could in the restricted space of the car. Gerard found his head going back and he was panting as the man was now fucking right into his prostate. Gerard had to force this, he always did. He tried to make it feel good for himself because then he could convince himself it wasn’t so bad. He tried to tell himself that the men he fucked in their cars and the alleyways cared for him. That they wanted him to feel good too, he knew deep down that it was a lie but he needed something to help him feel less dirty. 

“Oh, fuck!” Gerard cried and his dick, that had been rubbing on the mans belly, released. Long, thick strands of white cum landed on the man's stomach and Gerard cried out loudly as he continued to bounce and fuck his spot. “Oh, God yeah,” he whined in a high pitched voice.

“Fuckin’....whore,” the man grunted out as he impaled Gerard down onto his cock and held him there. Gerard whimpered as he felt the man’s cock pulsing as it released but then he felt something off. He slowly raised his hips when the man let him go and saw the condom had broken and cum leaked from his hole and all over the mans shiny cock. Gerard instantly felt even filthier and was filled with dread, wondering what kind of diseases he may get from the man. 

“I’ll give you a hundred for that,” the man mumbled and Gerard tried to hide his nerves and just smiled. He was also realizing that he had forgotten to get the money up front, he hoped the man would hold up to his word. 

“Sorry I came all through ya,” the man said with a dry chuckle that made Gerard flinch. He handed Gerard the money and Gerard carefully crawled back into the passenger seat where he fixed his panties and pulled his skirt back down from where it had been bunched up around his waist. He grabbed his jacket off the floor and pulled that on as well, zipping it up. 

Gerard tried to ignore the dampness he felt smearing all over his panties as they rode back and just sat quiet in the passenger seat. He got out when the man pulled back up to his corner and did his best to smile at the man but then he felt more cum leaking from inside him. 

“I’ll see you again soon,” the man said with a smirk and Gerard smiled and waved before the man left in his car. Gerard instantly dropped his smile and felt his eyes watering. He awkwardly sort of wattled to a deserted alleyway and stepped out of his panties before he squatted down and tightened his muscles up.

He bit his lip as he felt the cum dripping from his hole and just continued to work his muscles and to rid his body of as much of the fluid as possible. He was trying to hold himself together, he had been crying too much lately, he figured he just needed more sleep. Even when he would knowingly let a man finish inside him he did this. He felt disgusting and didn’t want the cum inside him.

“Um…,” Gerard’s head shot up and he looked up to see one of the male prostitutes standing there. He quickly stood up and tried to pull his skirt down further, though he knew the man hadn’t really seen anything. Gerard just looked down and felt ashamed, he was sure his face was as red as a stop sign. “Here,” the man was holding out a tampon in front of Gerard. 

Gerard scoffed and bitterly looked to the man in the dark alley. “Oh, I get it, cause I’m a pussy,” Gerard shot with a glare and sniffled, wiping his tears away. 

The man’s face scrunched up in confusion then shook his head. “No,” he said with a little amused smile. “It’ll help get the...cum out,” he said quietly and Gerard looked to it for a moment before he took it.

“How does it work?” Gerard said as he looked at the wrapper and turned it over in his hand. He knew what they were for but he’d never actually seen one be used or inserted. 

“Just...here,” the man said and took it from Gerard before he showed him the applicator. “Here, just lean against the wall, I’ll help you,” the man said and Gerard cautiously did. “You want to put the applicator in you a little,” the man mumbled and Gerard twitched a little when he felt the man wiggle it in, he felt awkward but hell he’d had worse things in his ass for less. “Then you just push it in,” the man said and Gerard squirmed a little when it felt it go inside him. 

“I don’t think I like it,” Gerard breathed and scrunched up his face. He stepped back from the wall and felt his hole and the string hanging from it. He waited a few minutes like the man instructed and then pulled on the string until the tampon came out and he found he felt dryer and a bit cleaner inside. “Thank you,” Gerard said a moment later before he reached down and grabbed his panties, just stuffing them in his pocket. 

“You’re fine, honey,” the guy said and waved his hand at Gerard as they started walking out of the alley together.

“So, where do you get tampons?” Gerard was curious if the man just bought them or if a friend gave them to him. He wanted to know if he could get them from the guy if he ever needed to again. As awkward as it had felt he definitely felt better now that he felt cleaner. 

“You know, the dude that’s always giving out condoms, and needles and shit,” the guy said and waved it off. “He suggested it to me. He caught me in a position like yours,” the man said and raised his eyebrows. 

Gerard’s eyes widened and he was glad another prostitute had found him and not some do-gooder. “I don’t know, he creeps me out a little,” Gerard confessed and shrugged as he hid his chin in his scarf. 

“Honey, I’ve been on this corner long enough to know a good man when I see one, he ain’t no pig,” the man said as he pressed back the long hair of his wig. “Well, he ain’t no cop pig and he ain’t no man pig,” he said like he was correct himself. “He’s done nothing but be nice to every person here and after all his months of doing it, hasn’t asked a single one of us for anything.” Gerard took this in and glanced to the taller man. “Though, there is a young girl who runs around here sometimes, he took her home a few times. She says he’s fucking her but I doubt it. I think he’s just too good of a man to leave a fourteen year old girl out on the streets,” the man shrugged as they walked. 

“You never know though,” Gerard sighed as he glanced around the dead street. “I’m cold. I’m gonna go home,” Gerard breathed and the other man nodded. “Stay warm,” Gerard called with a wave before he began his walk home.

* * *

Gerard had gotten home and jumped right into the shower. Normally he thought the water was too cold but tonight it felt like it would burn off his skin in the best of ways. He felt like he couldn’t get clean enough, even as he scrubbed his hole until it was red and sore. He got out when the water began to turn freezing and buried his clothes in the bottom of the hamper where Mikey wouldn’t find them. 

Gerard tiptoed down the hall and saw his bed was empty so he quietly checked Mikey’s room. His heart jumped up into his throat when Mikey’s bed turned up empty but then he heard Mikey’s weak voice call his name and he knelt down. He saw Mikey curled up on the floor under the bed. 

“Hey, you,” Gerard whispered with a small smile. “What are you doing under there?” Gerard wrapped his arms around himself as he looked to his little brother, he really hoped Mikey would come sleep with him tonight. He didn’t want to be alone with himself where he would think about all the things he had done. 

“I was scared,” Mikey admitted. “I had a bad dream, about mommy and daddy,” Mikey quietly confessed and he saw his older brother look to him sadly before he opened his arms. Mikey slowly crawled out from under the bed and into the arms of his big brother, his safe haven. 

“I’m sorry I wasn’t here,” Gerard said quietly and nuzzled close to Mikey. He really did feel bad when Mikey had his nightmares and he wasn’t home to comfort him. He curled the little body up in his arms and pulled him close to his chest. 

Gerard remembered his parents dying like no time had passed. He had been hanging out after school one day with his friends when the cops had pulled up. They had all hid their pot and some their cigarettes and tried to act normal but they were all amused, wondering what the cop had wanted. It was around that moment that the cops explained to Gerard that his parents had been bringing Mikey home from the hospital when their car had been hit by a truck that had swerved into the wrong lane, the driver had been drinking. His parents had died instantly and Mikey had been in critical condition for two months after the accident. Gerard only remembered back to grasping Mikey’s hand and sobbing as he looked to him as machines were the only thing keeping him alive. Gerard knew God or someone higher up had given Mikey back to him because the doctors had all told him that Mikey was going to die. Gerard had refused to let go and now he had his little brother nuzzled close in his arms to show for it.

“Let’s go lay down,” Gerard whispered and Mikey nodded before he wrapped his arms around Gerard’s shoulders. Gerard brought Mikey in and laid him down before he curled up with him. “I love you, Mikes,” Gerard whispered before he nuzzled the top of his little brother's head.

“I love you too, Gee,” Mikey yawned before he let himself fall back into slumber with his big brother close beside him, keeping him safe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So how do we feel about this so far?
> 
> Pros? Cons?
> 
> Also, we get to see a little of Gerard's night life.


	4. Chapter 4

Gerard had been washing up Mikey’s dinner dishes when his cell phone began to vibrate in his pocket. He cursed quietly as he quickly dried his hands and then pulled his phone from his tight jeans. He scrunched up his face in confusion at the random number before he hit the answer button and greeted the caller.

“Hey. Is this Gerard? This is Damien,” the voice said and Gerard’s eyes widened but then scrunched back up in confusion. “Hey, I’m sorry I didn’t call you but I lost your number. I just found it behind my nightstand. How are you?”

“Oh,” Gerard said and found himself smiling a little. “I’m good. How are you?” Gerard lightly bit at his lip and played with his hair. 

“I’m good. I was wondering if you wanted to go out tonight?” Damien said and Gerard found himself grinning wide and nodding before he realized he had to verbally answer. “Great. Do you want to meet somewhere?” 

“Uh, yeah, that’s fine. What did you have in mind?” Gerard bit his lip with a smile, it was better when guys didn’t come back to his place, there was less of a chance of Mikey being spotted, and he didn’t like sleeping with people with Mikey nearby. 

“How about that little Japanese place on Woodbury Ave?” Damien suggested this and Gerard smiled wide, it was a nice place. 

“Yeah, that sounds nice,” Gerard smiled and tucked his hair behind his ear. He’d never been to the place before but he had always seen how nice it was from the front windows. 

“Alright, see you at eight?” Damien was clearly smiling and his voice was so smooth that it made Gerard blush over the phone. 

“Eight sounds good,” Gerard smiled and tried to ignore how warm his cheeks were. “See you then,” he added and smiled when Damien said it back and then he hung up the phone. 

Gerard quickly went to take a shower, he only had two hours to get himself ready. He quickly scrubbed himself clean before he got out of the shower with a towel around his waist and went into his bedroom. He dried his face and hair before he sat himself at his vanity and began to put his makeup on.

“Gerard, can we…,” Mikey started but then he saw Gerard doing his makeup. “Are you leaving?” Mikey asked as he pulled on the bottom of his shirt and looked to his older brother. 

“I have a date,” Gerard said excited before he got up and began to dress himself. “He’s cute and he’s sweet and he’s rich,” Gerard chimed as he started pulling on his pants. 

Mikey had heard Gerard describe many men that he was going out with but _’rich’_ was always something that was mentioned. He just nodded his head a little and sat himself on the bed as he watched Gerard dress himself. 

“Well, I hope you have fun,” Mikey said with a small smile. He wondered what would be on TV tonight to keep him busy. He looked to Gerard and wished he would stay home with him, he hated being alone but he knew Gerard was doing this for both of them. 

“Me too,” Gerard sighed out contently and quickly finished primping himself in the mirror. “Okay, I have to walk to the restaurant so I have to hurry and get going. Bed by nine,” Gerard said as he headed down the hallway. 

“Ten!” Mikey said and contained his giggle. He smiled when he heard Gerard groan but agree. He ran down the hall and launched himself into Gerard’s arms when he had finished pulling on his tight jacket. “I love you, Gee,” Mikey smiled and squished his brothers cheeks.

Gerard smiled back and kissed Mikey on the cheek. “I love you too, Mikes.” Gerard nuzzled his little brother closely and breathed him in. 

“Be safe, Gee,” Mikey whispered and buried his nose into his older brother. He closed his eyes and he rested his head on Gerard’s shoulder for a minute.

“I will,” Gerard whispered, “Always.” He rubbed Mikey’s back and for a moment there was such a thick covering of tenderness in the air it almost made him sick. For a moment he tried to imagine what would happen to Mikey if, God forbid, he didn’t come home. He pushed it aside and kissed Mikey’s temple. “I’ll be back tonight,” Gerard said with a soft smile and set Mikey down. “Night, baby.” 

“Night, Gee,” Mikey said with a tiny wave and he frowned when the door closed. He breathed out weakly and walked over to the couch.

* * *

Gerard was forcing a smile onto his face as he sat across the table from Damien. This had turned into another failure. Damien was arrogant, rude, and just plain obnoxious. Everything Gerard added to the conversation, Damien undermined or ignored. Gerard figured he could go the rest of his life without hearing someone say, “Well that’s _your_ opinion,” ever again. 

Also when the bill came Damien subtly pushed it over to Gerard’s side of the table. Gerard had grimaced and paid the high bill as well as left the tip for the waiter. He just sighed out through his nose quietly and continued to listen to Damien drone on and on about how great he was at his job. He tried not to be obvious when he checked his watch and saw it was ten o’clock, he thought of Mikey at home crawling into bed. 

“So why don’t you come back to my place?” Damien pulled Gerard out of his thoughts with this question. Gerard wanted to ask the guy if he really thought he was going to get laid but just settled with a smile and a nodded. “Let’s go then,” Damien said with a smile back and took Gerard’s hand. 

They ended up getting into a taxi and riding to a nicer part of town. Gerard glanced out the window as he watched the cars go by and was having a moment where he was heavily thinking over his life. He was pulled from his thought again though, when Damien’s mouth made contact with his neck. He closed his eyes and contained the sigh that so badly wanted to escape him before he turned and looked to Damien, forcing a smile before he connected their lips. 

The ride lasted for about ten minutes and by then the kiss had grown heated and Damien had been groping at his ass. “Here we are,” Damien smirked before he opened the door to the taxi and got out. 

Gerard went to slide out but then heard the taxi driver clear his throat and hold out his hand. Gerard saw Damien look away at something and glared as he got out his wallet and handed the money over the the driver, he was broke now. He prayed Damien would give him some money to get home, since he lived over an hour from Damien’s place.

* * *

Gerard had bit his lip the whole time he had been seated with Damien on the couch listening to him talk. Luckily, Damien had gotten them a bottle of wine and Gerard had swigged down over two, large glasses in under half an hour. 

It wasn’t long before Damien’s mouth was on his neck again and Gerard was okay with this because he was used to it. It was something that kept Gerard from punching Damien in his face because his mouth was too busy to talk. 

It only took about twenty minutes before Gerard was clawing at Damien’s back and fussing as he was being pushed into. “Yeah, fuck,” Gerard wheezed out and then inhaled sharply as he arched his back. Luckily, Damien did know what he was doing when it came to being in bed, this was one plus. 

Gerard panted out and hid his face into Damien’s neck as he closed his eyes. “Oh,” he fussed and huffed out as he felt his body starting to heat up, he ran his fingers through Damien’s short blonde hair and pulled Damien’s mouth to his in a heated kiss. 

The dim light in the living room was instantly blinding as it came on all the way and brightly lit up the whole room. “What the fuck?!” Gerard heard loudly be screamed and he squinted, trying to focus his eyes. Damien was off him in a second and Gerard quickly reached down and grabbed up a shirt, covering himself. He now saw Damien talking to a tall, broad man who was standing in the doorway with his arms raised, showing his confusion. 

Gerard started shaking as he quickly tried to pull on his briefs and grabbed for his pants. He managed to get his pants up but didn’t zip them, he quickly grabbed up his shoes, shirt, and jacket. He tried to sneak by the now shouting couple but he wasn’t processing a single word of it until he heard, “You!?”

He instantly cowered back as the large man pointed to him. “Some two-bit skank! Fucking my boyfriend!” The mans shouting was so loud and booming it was making Gerard shake worse. 

“N-No,” Gerard said with a shaky voice. “I-I didn’t know that he had a boyfriend,” Gerard tried and then screamed when the man came up to him, his large fist connected with Gerard’s face and he hit the floor, his clothing and shoes scattering. 

Gerard sobbed out weakly and slowly crawled forward on the floor. He felt his eye throbbing and his hands were shaking worse. He felt a rough kick to his side and screamed again in pain before he curled up in the fetal position and began sobbing. 

“Baby, please?” Damien whimpered and grabbed onto his boyfriends arm. “He’s not worth it, I swear.” 

Gerard tried to be quiet as he laid on the floor shaking and sobbing. He felt the pain taking over his body and he just alternated between holding his face and his stomach. When Damien had pulled his boyfriend a little further away Gerard quickly jumped forward and grabbed his stuff before he ran out of the room. He sobbed as he shakily pulled his pants back up once he was out in the hall, he dressed himself quickly before he took the elevator down to the first floor and left the apartment building where people were looking at his busted face and messed up clothing. 

Once he was out on the sidewalk Gerard took a moment to try and get his bearings. He let himself cry for a long time before he started walking back, trying to think about where he was going but he was lost in the big city, he didn’t come to this part of town very often. 

He checked the time on his phone, happy that it hadn’t fallen out of his pocket when he had taken his pants off or when he had fallen to the floor. He saw it was one in the morning and he wondered if he could get home to Mikey before he woke up, he doubted it. 

He found himself wandering around and crying as he was so unbelievably lost. He just wanted to be home, curled up in his warm bed with Mikey, and with his face and ribs not aching. He hugged himself as the wind blew, it was cold, even with his jacket on. 

“H-Hey!” Gerard ignored the shout and figured it was someone calling to one of their friends. “Hey...you!” Gerard turned now and saw a dark black, convertible Mustang beside him on the road. He saw a guy leaning out the window and looking at him. He had the urge to tell the man to go fly a kite somewhere but then he realized who the man was. It was the man he’d met a week ago on the street corner, the man who had given him condoms. 

Gerard stood silent as the man pulled over and parked his car on the side of the road. He didn’t move when the man got out of his car, not even to wipe the tears from his cheeks and the ones that were hanging heavy in his eyes. The man came over and gently slid his hands into the back pockets of his jeans.

“Hey, I…,” the man stopped short when he got a look at Gerard and frowned. “Do you need a ride?” He figured that was the best he could do for the man right now, he didn’t imagine he lived around here. He hadn’t known that the person was Gerard from behind but he had seen them leave the apartment looking frazzled and upset, he just wanted to help. He was worried the man had been dragged up here and beaten up by a possible john. 

“P-Please?” Gerard squeaked and thought he would just sob. He couldn’t imagine standing out in the cold a minute longer while Mikey was home alone. He continued to hug himself as the man nodded and then went over, opening the passenger side door for Gerard. “Thank you,” Gerard said with a little cry before he got in and prayed this guy really was as nice as everyone said. 

The man nodded and closed the door before he came around and got in. He turned on the heat and moved the vents towards Gerard’s shaking form. “Thank you,” Gerard said again and he didn’t know if he was shaking from being so scared, the pain, the cold, or everything combined. 

“You’re welcome,” the man said and glanced to Gerard. “So where am I heading?” 

“Oh,” Gerard gulped and his voice threatened to waver. He started crying and shook his head. “I don’t know where I am or how to get home,” he cried and just leaned forward, putting his face in his hands. 

“Hey, hey,” the man said and he almost reached out to touch Gerard but thought better of it. “Just give me your address and I’ll put it in my GPS,” he said and turned the tiny screen on that hung from his windshield.

Gerard had to pull himself together a little more to give the man his information. He was once again left hoping that this man was nice and wouldn’t abuse his knowledge of Gerard’s home. 

“Well it says we’re an hour away. That would have taken you a long time to walk,” the man said and glanced over to Gerard. “I’m Frank Iero, by the way,” he said and held his hand out to Gerard.

“Gerard Way,” he replied and took the man’s hand before he sniffled softly. He then retracted his hand and went back to hugging himself. 

“Nice to meet you,” Frank said with a small smile. “Again,” he added and Gerard smiled a little but he remembered their first meeting and frowned a little instead. “Are you alright?” Frank asked when he saw the bruise forming on Gerard’s face and the way he hugged his side and his face was showing his discomfort.

“I just...I had an accident,” Gerard whispered quietly and looked down, hiding his face with his hair. He looked at the expensive car and really would not have placed it as Frank’s. The man didn’t exactly dress like he had money. He wore ratty jeans and baggy shirts, hardly the outfits of well off men. 

“I’m sorry,” Frank muttered as he turned where the GPS told him to and kept his eyes on the road when he sensed Gerard’s discomfort from his glances. 

“I’m okay,” Gerard said with a nod, “but...thank you.” Gerard gave Frank a small smile before he looked back down. 

The car ride was mostly quiet for the rest of the way back to Gerard’s and he felt embarrassed when they pulled up to his crummy little house. He felt awkward and lightly cleared his throat. “Thanks….for the ride,” he said with a small smile at Frank.

“Don’t worry about it,” Frank said with a soft smile. “Hey,” Frank called when Gerard went to get out and watched him turn back to him. “If you ever need help again…,” Frank started as he leaned over a bit but Gerard instantly cut him off.

“No, I’m fine. Thanks,” Gerard said quickly before he got out of the car and slammed the door shut in Frank’s face. He figured Frank was trying to come onto him and knew he was just like every other guy he met. He then noticed he had left his jacket in the warm car when he got out in the cold. He turned and saw the window was down and Frank was holding out Gerard’s jacket as he looked forward to the road.

“Goodnight, Gerard,” Frank said before he rolled the window up when Gerard took the jacket from his hand timidly. He pulled away from Gerard’s house and began driving back home. 

Gerard felt a bit of guilt for what he had done. He figured he might have jumped the gun on Frank and assumed bad of him, he had been rude. He sighed out weakly before he got his keys out of his jacket pocket and walked up to the house. He unlocked the door and went in before he relocked it and tossed down his coat and keys, being mindful of Mikey sleeping.

Gerard decided on getting an ice pack and going to sit on the couch, holding it to his face and one to his side. He winced when the cold touched his side but forced himself through it. He knew if he didn’t put ice on them they’d be even worse in the morning. 

“Gee?” Gerard looked to Mikey who was standing at the end of the hall, looking to his older brother who was sitting on the couch without his shirt on and with nasty bruises. “Gee, what happened?!” Mikey cried and ran up to his big brother but he didn’t dare hug him or jump into his arms like normal. 

“I just had an accident, Mikes. I am fine,” he reassured, lying to the innocent little face before him. “I tripped over my big boots,” Gerard forced himself to giggle but doing so hurt his ribs. He was worried they might be cracked, if not possibly broken in some places. 

Mikey smiled a bit. “You’re silly,” he said before he carefully placed himself in Gerard’s lap and rested his head on Gerard’s shoulder. “I hope you’re okay,” he said and pouted his lips.

“M’fine,” Gerard said again and nudged Mikey’s head gently with shoulder. “How are you? You feeling okay?”

“I’m fine, Gee. I’m always fine when you’re with me,” Mikey smiled and nuzzled into Gerard’s shoulder. “Not sick,” he added, knowing what Gerard had meant.

“Good,” Gerard said and kissed the top of Mikey’s head before he rubbed his back, dropping the ice pack that had been on his face to give Mikey comfort. 

Mikey reached for the ice pack and gently pressed it back to Gerard’s face. Gerard and Mikey looked into each other's eyes and there was a deepness, an understanding in Mikey’s eyes that Gerard had never seen before. He realized how big his little brother was getting and it made Gerard pull him a little closer. 

“I love you,” Gerard said and he kissed the top of Mikey’s head, smiling at the little bit of hair that was growing back. 

“I love you too, Gee,” Mikey breathed out and nuzzled against his older brother, happy to be close to Gerard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is a little late! 
> 
> Hope you like it!


	5. Chapter 5

When Gerard awoke the next morning he tried not to think about the pain in his face and his side but he winced when he moved to wrap his arm around Mikey. He sighed out through his nose as his little brother nuzzled into his chest while he remained in his sleepy state. He couldn’t get last night out of his head as he heard his little brother’s soft breathing. He just tried not to think too heavily on how bad things could have gotten but it still lingered in his mind. 

He held Mikey for a good twenty minutes before he saw that it was almost eight and he gently kissed the top of his head. “Mikey, hey, we have to get up,” Gerard said quietly and smiled when his little brother fussed. “None of that,” Gerard smiled and sat up quick, nearly shouting from the sudden pain in his side that he had forgotten about, he bit his lip to stifle his noise. He was happy to see that Mikey was still asleep and unphased. 

“Michael,” Gerard said a little louder and pulled the blankets off Mikey. “Up,” he said and tickled his little brothers feet with a smile.

Mikey jumped and fussed but sat up with a smile and fisted at one of his eyes. “Why? It’s so early,” Mikey whined obnoxiously as he yawned.

“You have a doctors appointment today,” Gerard said quietly, compared to Mikey’s loud complaining. “I want you to take a shower and I’m going to get your breakfast ready,” Gerard said as he pulled on a pair of sweatpants over his boxers. 

He walked out of the bedroom and down the hall to the kitchen where he got into the fridge. He bit his lip, they needed more groceries. He grabbed up the carton of eggs and opened it, seeing half a dozen left. 

“Micheal James! I don’t hear that shower running,” Gerard shouted from his spot at the stove and smirked when he heard his little brother groan loudly and stomp out into the hall. “Thank you!” 

Gerard hummed quietly as he made Mikey’s cheesy, scrambled eggs and some toast. He put himself in a piece of toast and munched it as he buttered Mikey’s pieces. He managed to get all the eggs on one plate without making too much of a mess and put the toast with it. He placed the plate on the little four person table in the middle of the kitchen and went down the hall. 

“Your breakfast is on the table,” Gerard said quietly when Mikey came out of the bathroom door. “I have to get dressed,” Gerard motioned to the bedroom as he looked over Mikey’s outfit, happy he was properly dressed for his appointment. 

Gerard went into his room and got himself dressed quickly, he grimaced at his face as he sat at his vanity. He knew he had to cover the bruising around his eye a little. It was dark brown and purple, he couldn’t hide the puffiness but he could take away some of the shocking color. 

Twenty-five minutes later Gerard was quickly walking into the kitchen. “Alright, buddy, we have to go! I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to make you late!” Gerard was fretting as he took Mikey’s hand and went out the door with him. Mikey had been waiting beside the door with his coat and shoes on when Gerard had come out of his room. 

“Zip up your coat,” Gerard breathed as he let go of Mikey’s hand so he could. “We have to hurry or we’ll miss the bus into town,” Gerard said with a sigh and ran his fingers through his hair. It seemed he couldn’t keep up with anything lately. 

They managed to make the bus just in time and Gerard let Mikey curl up in his lap. He knew Mikey got worn out when he was rushed around and Gerard felt horrible for making his weak, little brother run the last four blocks to catch the bus. He heard Mikey’s desperate little pants and rubbed his little brothers back before he brushed his hand over the back of Mikey’s head. 

“You okay?” Gerard asked as he looked into his little brothers bleary eyes. He gently rubbed Mikey’s cold fingers. “I forgot your gloves,” Gerard said with realization and he felt like he might cry for a moment. He forced himself to hold it in. It would do him no good to let out his frustrations on a bus full of random people who would look at him like he was crazy. He just felt like such a failure lately and it wouldn’t bother him so much but he was failing his brother, he hid his face with his hand.

“No you didn’t,” Mikey said and pulled his gloves out of his jacket pockets. He put them on his cold fingers as he was calming his labored breaths. “You put them in there the last time we got home,” Mikey said as he looked to Gerard, who was taking his hand away from his face. Mikey could tell that Gerard had been about to lose it. He didn’t like how upset Gerard sometimes got but he knew his brother had a lot on his plate, well as much as Gerard would let him know. He sometimes wished Gerard would go back to the way he used to be, happy. Gerard hardly ever cried back when their parents were alive, now Mikey saw him do it all the time. 

“I did?” He looked confused as he stared to the gloves but when he saw Mikey nod he sighed out a little. “Thank God,” Gerard breathed out with a sigh. He knew it really wasn’t that big of a deal but it felt like it was the end of the world. Everything was so hard and trying around Gerard that the slightest thing could push him over the edge. 

Mikey smile at Gerard and kissed his older brothers cheek. He had lied for him, he didn’t want to see his brother break down. Gerard had forgotten them but he had grabbed them and stuffed them into his pockets. He was glad he did now because he had made his older brother feel better and that’s all Mikey wanted. Gerard did so much for him, so he liked anything he could do to make Gerard feel okay.

* * *

Gerard sat beside Mikey in the hospital room and kept on his calm face like he always did. Even though, on the inside, he was losing his mind with worry and sadness. He hated to see the doctors take so much blood from Mikey and run tests on him. It always wore Mikey out and left the little boy in bed for the rest of the day. 

The doctors took forever and by three in the afternoon Mikey was sitting in a zombie-like state as he blankly stared forward at the door to his room, waiting for a doctor. He looked so vacant and it broke Gerard’s heart to see. 

“You’re doing so well,” Gerard whispered and Mikey looked over to his brother with a small smile. “How about we get some pizza after this?” Gerard hoped it would make his little brother happy. He had grabbed the last of his money out of the coffee can under his bed, which meant that he had to work again that night. He hadn’t planned on it but Damien had spent up all his money when they had gone out together. He wondered if people would be okay with his face being so messed up. 

“I’d like that,” Mikey whispered with a smile to Gerard but his attention turned to the door when it opened. Gerard saw Mikey’s whole body tense up and frowned but he also notice that his had as well when a pain ran up his side from his bruised ribs. 

Every trip to the doctor was a nightmare for them both. Gerard feared that Mikey’s cancer would come back and Mikey had the same fear but so much more lingered on Mikey’s sickness.

Mikey always felt bad about their doctor visits, he would see the envelopes come with hospital’s name on them, and Gerard would sometimes cry and then he would have to go out a lot at night. 

“Well, everything is looking alright,” the doctor said as he sat down on his chair and used his legs to move himself closer to Mikey and Gerard. “I mean, we still need to have the blood tested at the lab but he’s healthy,” the doctor said to Gerard whose whole body was strung like a cord. “You’ve done well Gerard. He’s put on weight and he’s clearly getting his meds,” the doctor said as he looked between the two.

Gerard had tried to hold it back but when the doctor told him that he was doing well for Mikey, he felt his eyes water and he began to cry. He looked down and bit his lip as he just felt a little relief. Everything had been so stressful, he needed this good news, and it made him feel good inside. He brought his hand up to cover his eyes and to subtly wipe at them.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered and waved his hand before he wiped away the tears and sighed out. “It’s just...It’s good to hear he’s doing okay,” Gerard confessed with another breath, getting his eyes to stop watering. 

“I completely understand,” the doctor said with a nod. “Cancer is a scary disease,” he said as he looked to Gerard who nodded. “But Mikey’s strong, he’ll do just fine,” the doctor assured before he stood up. “Make sure that you stop at the front desk. I’d like to book another appointment for Mikey in about a month. I will call you with the blood results.”

Gerard nodded to everything the doctor said and then sighed out when the man left and looked to Mikey with a smile. “Come on you,” he said as he helped Mikey slip into his jacket. “Let’s go get that pizza.”

* * *

Mikey had gotten home from the appointment and from eating his pizza and crashed out almost instantly in Gerard’s bed. Gerard had covered him up and rubbed his back for a good while as he just looked to him. 

Every appointment they went to seemed to have something bad in store for them but this one had been good. At the last appointment the doctor had told Gerard that Mikey’s low weight concerned him and that he needed to put on a few pounds. Gerard had done everything he could, even cut out his own eating and now Mikey had gained his weight.

Gerard leaned down over Mikey and kissed his little brothers soft hair. He smiled sadly at the tiny little tuffs that had only started growing back a few months ago. He had to run his fingers through the soft hair, reminding and reassuring him that Mikey was doing okay. Mikey normally wore a soft hat over his head because he wasn’t used to having hair and now Gerard figured it was mostly habit but he was happy to see Mikey’s hair when he could, even if it was growing in unevenly.

“I’ll be back, baby,” Gerard whispered quietly to his little brother’s sleeping mind and he forced himself to pull away. He made sure to pull an extra blanket from the closet to drape over Mikey. The house felt a little colder than normal but Gerard knew it was getting later into October and he couldn’t afford to keep the heat up too high. 

Gerard went to his vanity and quickly did his makeup that he was all too familiar with doing. He put on one of his skimpy little outfits and quickly left the room, hoping Mikey wouldn’t wake up while he was gone. He would have given Mikey another little kiss but he feared his little brother waking up to find him in a skirt and all done up. 

Gerard shivered when he walked down the hallway and looked to the thermostat. It said it was sixty-two degrees in the house, even with the heater set to sixty-eight. “Fuck,” Gerard whispered before he turned the heat up to seventy-four. He prayed it would get warmer so Mikey wouldn’t be so cold. 

Gerard shot one more glance down the hall to his room where Mikey was before he left the house and made sure to tightly lock up. He made sure to try the handle and push the door open after it was done, testing the lock, it held tightly. He normally didn’t have to worry so much but he knew Mikey was inside and tired from the day, he’d be less likely to wake up if there were noises from someone getting inside the house. 

Gerard walked the short walk to the street corner he normally stood on and looked around. It was freezing tonight and Gerard had heard the weatherman mention snow when he had been sitting in the waiting room with Mikey earlier. He wished his jacket was thicker as the wind was blowing hard and it seemed like he was just standing out there without it. 

It wasn’t too long before Gerard found himself to be the only person standing out beside the road. The snow had started falling about half an hour ago and there was already a decent half inch covering everything. Gerard shook a little and tried to keep shaking out his hair as he waited for any car to pull up. He prayed for it because he needed the money and because he had lost feeling in a few of his fingers. He’d been standing on the sidewalk for about an hour and he knew it was in the low teens at the most. 

“Please,” Gerard whispered as he closed his eyes and shook. He needed a car so badly, he didn’t have any money, and he had bills and rent was due in two weeks. He also needed to get more food for the fridge and cupboards that were becoming vacant again. 

When the ground was covered in two inches of snow Gerard felt himself staring blankly at the white substance. He blinked a few times and looked up, trying to remember what he was doing. He stumbled a little when he tried to move, his feet feeling heavy as he shook harshly. He had to get home, he knew this but as he looked around, he couldn’t remember which way home was. He whined and stumbled a little towards one end of the sidewalk, seeing if his brain would tell him that this was right but he was so cold, he couldn’t think about anything else.

“Gerard?” Gerard turned around, almost falling over and saw a man had been standing behind him. He knew that he had seen this man in particular before but he couldn’t remember when or why. The man was bundled up and he looked really warm, Gerard wondered how nice it would feel to be warm.

“Hey, are you okay?” Gerard heard the voice but it sounded a bit far off, he went to walk towards the man but his foot couldn’t lift itself properly and he fell forward into the cold snow. He blinked weakly as he heard his name being said again, a little more urgently. He wanted to respond to it but suddenly, he felt so warm as he laid on the ground. The ground felt soft, other than where there was a dull pulsing around his right eye. He closed his eyes, deciding that he deserved a nap.

* * *

Mikey yawned weakly and stretched himself out in Gerard’s bed before he pressed himself forward, looking for Gerard’s chest. He was still mostly asleep but his touch of consciousness alerted him to how cold he was. He fussed and pressed even further forward. When he didn’t touch Gerard’s chest his hand reached out for his older brother but his eyes weakly opened to see what his hand had confirmed, he was alone. 

Mikey slowly sat up before he hugged himself in the freezing, dark room. He wished that he hadn’t woken up because then he could still be sleeping and not noticing how cold it really was.

“Gee?” Mikey’s voice came out as a tiny, tired squeak. When he heard no response he forced himself out of the bed with the warm blankets to go check for his brother. He tiptoed down the hall and checked the entirety of their tiny house.

He fussed and hugged himself more as he shivered and his toes already felt like they were frozen. He went over to the wall and looked at the thermostat to see that it said twenty degrees on it and as he looked at the number, it dropped down to nineteen. He didn’t know if that was normal or not, he figured it wasn’t but Gerard always told him he couldn’t play with the thermostat. 

“Gee?” Mikey feebly said again, hoping his brother would magically appear. He went into his room and pulled all the blankets off his bed before he brought them into Gerard’s room. He curled up under the pile of thin blankets and his teeth chattered loudly.

When Mikey had finally warmed up the blankets with his body he tucked his head under the covers too. His nose and ears were freezing and he rubbed them with his little hands. He yawned and nuzzled into the blankets that smelt like his older brother. He wanted Gerard to come home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Gerard....Poor Mikey...
> 
> Hope you like it!


	6. Chapter 6

Gerard hummed out a content sound, he felt like he was in some special heaven. He was warm and he was wrapped entirely with something soft. He found himself slightly squirming around to rub himself on the softness that encased him. 

He felt like he couldn’t be happier but as his arms went out before him to grab for Mikey he huffed out, disapprovingly. He knew he must be sleeping so where was his little brother. Wasn’t Mikey enjoying this soft warmth with him? He shifted around a little with his eyes closed, his body searching for his little brothers but it didn’t find it in the soft bed. 

Gerard forced his eyes open and he had to blink a few times to get the fuzziness out of his vision. He rubbed at his eyes to help them wake up before his body started coming back from it’s sleepy state. 

Gerard instantly shot up in the bed and looked around the room he was in. He figured it must be early morning since the sun was just starting to light up the sky outside. He slowly pulled back the covers that were over him and saw that he was still dressed but his boots were gone. He tried to remember what had happened the night before. He couldn’t remember going home with a customer but maybe he had, though he didn’t feel like he had been fucked. He just remembered being cold, hungry, and tired. 

When he stood up he saw his boots on the floor beside the bed and instantly bent down to put them on. As he did he took a moment to gauge the room he was in. It was decent sized with hardwood floors and deep red walls. He liked the room and he especially like the expensive guitars that hung on the walls. As he zipped his boots he glanced to the nightstand and saw a few stray bills crumpled up with some change. He glanced around before he stole the bills and crammed them into the pocket of his jacket. 

He couldn’t hear any other noises but his own so he pawed into the nightstand and found some more money, he took that too. He felt guilty but he knew he needed the money, he was starving and he needed food to take home to Mikey. As soon as he thought of his little brother he began to panic. He had been home alone all night and this made Gerard’s heart scared but he knew his little brother was probably okay, he would call him and make sure. 

Gerard got up from the soft, warm bed and walked over to a desk that was in the corner of the large room. He shuffled through some of that stuff but didn’t find anything pleasing. He glanced to the large, open closet door and stepped in. The walk-in closet was huge and Gerard instantly started quietly pouring around in it. 

“Here we go,” he whispered as he knelt down in front of an old wooden box. He saw that it was locked and he huffed outward. He glanced around the closet for something and when he couldn’t find it, he went back out to the desk and grabbed up the letter opener he had seen out there. 

He pried it open but not without harshly scathing the wood and leaving gauges where the nails ripped out from the metal latch being pried away. He moved away the veil on top of the items and ignored it. He saw an expensive, antique ring, and an old necklace that he thought was gorgeous. There was also a little hairpin, tiara that had sparkling little jewels in it, he knew a place he could pawn them. Gerard pocketed the ring and the necklace and started cramming the hairpin into his other pocket when he heard someone clear their throat behind him. 

He froze in fright and his hands shook a little before he slowly stood up from where he was kneeling and turned around. His guilt increased heavily when he saw the nice man, Frank standing in the doorway of the closet with his arms crossed. He wanted to say something but the angered, bitter look on Frank’s face and in his eyes kept him quiet. 

“I don’t mind if you take the money,” Frank said quietly. “But if you’d please put back my grandmother's wedding ring and items, I would appreciate it,” he said before he glanced to the ground, looking at Gerard’s dirty boots on the white rug of his closet. 

Gerard still couldn’t speak but he did slowly turn and knelt down putting the items back and placing the veil back in the box as delicately as he could. He shut it when he was done and felt sick when he saw the wood burning on the top in a delicate, cursive font. _’To my love, Lillian’_

He turned back to Frank but he kept his eyes on the ground with his hands in his pockets. “Thank you,” he heard Frank mutter before he left the closet with Gerard still standing there feeling his whole body warm with embarrassment and guilt. 

After a few moments, Gerard timidly snuck out of the closet, and his guilt reached a new height when he saw a tray on the bed with pancakes on it. Gerard tried not to walk over to it but the smell of the coffee attracted him and he found himself reach for it before he could stop himself. He took a large swig of it and made a content noise before he grabbed up one of the pancakes and bit into it as he held it in his hand. 

He tasted blueberries in the breading and it only made him eat them faster. He swallowed down the three pancakes quickly and drank the coffee faster than he would have liked. Now he felt full, warm, and tired again. He sighed as he sat himself on the bed, he didn’t want to leave the room. He had embarrassed himself and felt like a horrible person. 

Curiosity eventually got the best of him though and he wandered out of the bedroom and into a small hallway. There was a smaller bedroom across the way that looked like it was being used for a storage room and a bathroom at one end, the other end had a wide, wooden, spiral staircase that went downward. Gerard forced himself to walk down the stairs and found himself standing in an expensive, open loft.

He noted the large flat screen and the expensive coffee table, the large couch. He saw the crumpled pillow and blankets on the couch and felt even worse, knowing Frank had slept down here so Gerard could take the bed.

Gerard could see Frank, standing at the sink and slowly walked up behind him. “Sir, I’m really sorry,” Gerard said hopelessly and looked at Frank’s back. “I just...I didn’t know where I was or what was happening and I…,” Gerard just cut off and looked down, he felt his eyes watering up and felt even more embarrassed. He realized that his first instinct had been to steal and sneak things. He didn’t know what was happening to him, he used to be a good person.

Frank turned around and looked to Gerard with a soft sigh through his nose. “You passed out,” Frank said quietly. “You shouldn’t have been out there in that cold,” Frank frowned when he said this. “I was going to take you to the hospital but...I know that sometimes the hospital isn’t a good idea,” Frank said with a shrug.

Gerard was grateful that Frank hadn’t taken him to one. He couldn’t afford it to begin with but if it got mentioned that Gerard was a prostitute, selling himself on the street, he could lose Mikey.

“Do you want...payment?” Gerard asked and he really didn’t want to sleep with the other man but he owed him. He had slept with worse for less, he could do this for the man who had saved his life. 

Frank looked to Gerard for a moment and then he seemed to have a look on his face like he had an idea. Gerard bit his lip a little, he had been hoping that this guy would be different but it appeared he was wrong. He figured he could just hike up his skirt and bend over the counter, it wouldn’t be too bad. 

“I want to take you to dinner,” Frank said and Gerard took a moment to process his words but he looked up to Frank with wide eyes when he did. “On Saturday, at seven,” Frank said with a little smile. “I’ll pick you up?”

Gerard found himself unable to speak once again and realized this seemed to happen a lot around Frank. He looked over Frank for a moment, spotting the tattoos that had always been covered before by his jacket. Frank wasn’t ugly, that was for sure, and he wasn’t broke. Gerard still didn’t know if he really wanted to or not but he knew Frank had money.

“Yeah,” Gerard said with a forced smile. “I’d like that,” he said but the lie had fallen off his tongue so many time before that he, himself almost believed it. He knew that Frank didn’t actually want to date him, Frank wanted to fuck him. No man would settle for a prostitute as a boyfriend but then he was confused by the situation. If Frank just wanted to have sex with him...why buy him dinner? Gerard had just offered himself to Frank as payment. He figured that Frank might just feel better about himself if he bought a hooker dinner first.

“Great,” Frank said with a surprised smile. “Uh, did you need a ride home?” Frank asked and waited for Gerard’s sheepish nod. “Alright, I’ll take you,” Frank said before he ran by Gerard and went upstairs to pull on some pants. 

Gerard sighed as he stood by the door. He glanced around the expensive apartment and almost laughed at himself as he tried to imagine living in a place as nice as this.

* * *

Gerard had been so relieved to see the door still intact when he got home. He had spat a quick goodbye to Frank and told him that he would see him Saturday. 

When Gerard entered the house he was waiting for the warm air to hit him since he was cold from the walk from the car to the house but was instantly disappointed when he walked into the house and it was just as cold inside as it was outside. He set down his jacket and kicked off his boots, confused. 

Gerard instantly went to the thermostat to see that it was twenty-five degrees in the house. He tried messing with the buttons but the heat didn’t come on. “Fuck,” he said through a shuddering breath. He instantly thought of Mikey and quickly ran into his bedroom. He saw the huge pile of blankets and instantly lifted them to see Mikey curled up in a ball. He felt Mikey on his back, so his cold fingers wouldn’t touch Mikey’s skin and he was okay, he was warm. This let Gerard calm and he quickly covered his little brother back up to keep him warm. 

He hurriedly took off his skirt and threw it into his closet before he pulled on warmer sweatpants and a shirt over his little tanktop. He shivered as he walked down the hall and put his coat back on before he slipped back into his boots. 

Gerard grumbled as he walked through the few inches of fresh snow and into the tiny patch of lawn he had behind his crummy, little house. He walked up to the propane tank and looked at the gauge on it. He cursed when he saw it was empty and harshly kicked the tank, instantly regretting it as his toe throbbed in his boot. 

He didn’t have the money to fill the tank now and he had forgotten about it all summer. He guiltily took out the money he had stolen from Frank and counted it. He had fifty bucks, he just needed a little something until he could get some customers tonight. 

He walked down the road to one of the little pawn shops and bought an electric heater. He couldn’t believe the price on it but managed to take the small item home. Where he went into his bedroom where Mikey was resting and turned it on after he blocked the windows with blankets, hoping to hold in more heat.

When he was finished he went out into the living room and sat in the cold. He leaned forward and rubbed at his eyes with a shaky sigh. He knew Mikey would have to stay in his room as much as possible to keep warm. He knew he’d probably have to go out tonight and work twice as hard to get money since now he also had to pay the gas company. He thought over his rent, the propane, and food and just felt sick. 

“Gee?” Gerard looked up to see Mikey shivering in the hallway as he hugged himself. 

“Hey,” Gerard said and quickly stood before he picked up Mikey, gently grabbing under his arms and lifting him. “I need you to stay in the bedroom today. The heaters broken, someone’s suppose to come and fix it soon,” Gerard lied. 

Mikey wrapped his arms around his older brother's shoulder and rested his head there with a yawn. “I missed you,” Mikey breathed and nuzzled closer to Gerard. 

“I missed you too,” Gerard said with a sad smile before he gently leaned down and put Mikey into bed. “I thought about you all night.”

Mikey smiled at Gerard a little as he was being carefully covered up. “I wanted to watch TV today,” Mikey squeaked after a minute. “I’m bored in here,” Mikey pouted. “Why don’t we have a TV in here too?” Mikey questioned innocently. 

“I...I don’t need a TV in my room,” Gerard said quietly to his little brother. He got Mikey’s soft hat from his room and came back, carefully putting it on his head. 

“They have one in all the hospital rooms,” Mikey said as he looked to his older brother who seemed to be avoiding making contact with his eyes. 

“This isn’t a hospital,” Gerard said with a small sigh as he turned up the heater and then walked over to his drawers, pulling out a sweatshirt. 

“My friend Andy, who was in the hospital with me, his parents bought him a TV for his own room. Since he was sick and couldn’t get out of bed a lot. They bought him lots of video games and movies and everything,” Mikey chimed as he watched Gerard pull the sweatshirt over his head. 

Gerard was trying to stay calm even though he felt his insides churning with too many emotions. “That’s because there’s two of them and they probably have good jobs,” Gerard said blandly as he turned the heater up a little more, listening to the button beep again. 

“He had an older brother too,” Mikey said and sat up a little, leaning back on his pillow. “He told me that his brother was going to school for art, like you wanted to, and that he was going to be rich,” Mikey said and looked to his brother. “I thought, maybe you could date him? Since we don’t have any money and you like guys with money.” Mikey smiled, thinking he was being helpful.

Gerard was back to Mikey and he was grateful for it because his eyes were watering before he knew they even were. He looked down and closed his eyes tightly as his face scrunched up and his body was telling him to take a deep inhale. He broke it down to a weak one and slowly walked towards the door, he had to get out of the room. 

“Gerard? Where are you going?” Mikey asked as he quickly sat up more in the bed. He watched his brother leave the room and close the door behind him. Frowning, he slowly laid himself back down. 

Gerard slowly walked into the living room and sat on the couch. He looked around his crummy, little rented house and had to bury his face into his hands. He was a failure. He was never going to go to art school like he had dreamed of. He was never going to get back his virginity, which he had sold online for five grand to help pay some of Mikey’s bills, that had been horrible. And he would never have a normal life again. 

His little brother had unknowingly released the floodgates that had been already weakened. Gerard was tired, he was just so fucking tired. He got up, he fed Mikey, he took care of him. Then he’d go out all night and let people touch him and fuck him for cash to pay the never ending bills. He’d catch up, something would break, something unexpected would come, something always happened. He hardly slept lately and it didn’t help. 

Gerard just looked over to the wall where a framed photo of his parents hung, the glass cracked in one corner and the frame was just cheap plastic. He cried more when he looked to them and just hung his head. “I’m sorry,” he breathed and he closed his eyes tightly. He knew that they would be so ashamed of him if they were still alive and the thought killed him because he was trying so hard. 

Gerard realized he had to make something to eat, it was mid-afternoon already, and Mikey hadn’t eaten anything. He slowly stood from the couch and poured around the kitchen. Each cupboard proved itself to be more and more empty. 

“Fuck,” Gerard cursed and fisted at his hair. He stomped into the bedroom and quickly got into his closet, grabbing what he needed, and balling it up. 

“Gerard? Where are you going?” Mikey asked as he saw his brother going for the door.

“I have to go to work for a little bit. I’ll be back in a few hours,” Gerard said and he stopped himself from closing the door. He breathed out a little and calmed himself. “I love you, Mikes.”

Mikey gave him a small, crooked smile back. “I love you too, Gee. Be safe.”

Gerard walked over and leaned down, gently kissing his little brother’s forehead. “I will. Always,” he whispered before he gently nuzzled into his little brothers soft hat. He didn’t want to but he pulled himself away. “Bye,” he waved and he saw Mikey wave back.

Gerard got himself ready in the bathroom. He put on the sluttiest outfit he had and did his makeup to match. He looked at himself and bit his lip. There was a certain street corner that he had been to one time and never returned. The men there were rough and as unrespectful as they could be but they paid, extra even. Gerard applied a little more lip gloss and looked at himself in the mirror. 

“I hate you,” Gerard whispered to his own reflection before he turned and headed out of the house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Early chapter since all my other ones seemed to fall a day or so late! I hope you like it! 
> 
> Enjoy!


	7. Chapter 7

Gerard was gagging harshly as the man above him was fucking into his mouth with brutal thrusts. Gerard’s knees ached as he was kneeling on the hard cement of an alleyway, hidden from the road by a dumpster. 

“Yeah...fuck,” the man grunted as he gripped the back of Gerard’s neck, roughly pulling at the hair there. “You’ve got a great mouth,” he complimented as he felt the whore’s tongue working against his dick. 

Gerard felt his eyes watering and hopped his makeup wouldn’t be too messed up after this. He had been out for over two hours and had six hundred dollars crammed in his corset. He had been fucked by five guys and had given head to about nine guys, the guy in his mouth made number ten. He felt tired, gross, and uncomfortable but he almost had all the money he needed. 

Gerard shifted and a little on his knees and was concentrating on breathing as the man's thrust got desperate. He gagged harshly and his throat was aching horribly. He moaned around the man's thick cock, trying to at least seem like he was into it. 

He was trying to focus but all he could think about was the last man who had fucked him behind this dumpster. The man had offered him a hundred dollars if Gerard would let him cum in his stretched, gaping hole, Gerard had agreed. 

“Ah, fuck. M’oh yes,” the man huffed and he pulled out of Gerard’s mouth and quickly started stroking his tip. “Open your fucking mouth,” he snapped when Gerard had closed it for a second just trying to catch his breath.

Gerard did what the man commanded and stuck out his tongue, panting warm, damp breaths onto the man's deep red cock. “Yeah, give it to me,” Gerard panted with a moan. “Come on, baby,” he encouraged and sucked the man's tip into his mouth for a moment before he let it go with an obscene pop. 

That was all it took before the man came in long, thick strands all over Gerard’s face. Gerard moaned and put on a show for the man, licking the cum from his face before he sucked on the man's tip that was still gushing. 

“Yeah,” the man dragged out before he added a long, breathy, “Fuck.” He brushed back Gerard’s hair and looked down to his face, watching the younger male clean himself. 

Gerard smiled up at the man before he slowly stood, having to lean on the wall for a moment as his knees were weak. “Thanks, baby,” he mumbled as the man pressed into his mouth with his own. 

“Listen, if you come back next Friday, I’d get us a hotel room. Pay you six hundred for the night,” the man said as he looked to Gerard. “I’d fuck you good,” he mumbled as he mouthed at Gerard’s neck and palmed Gerard’s ass under the little skirt. “I’ll pick you up on the corner?”

Gerard leaned into the man like the slutty, little bitch he was suppose to be and smiled. “Baby, I’ll be here,” he whispered and kissed the man. Six hundred dollars would pay his rent and he needed it, though he figured with stops like this, he wouldn’t even need the trip but this guy was...nice. Plus, he could sleep with only one guy instead of fifteen. 

“Night, baby,” the man purred before he kissed Gerard once more. He quickly fixed his pants before he walked around the dumpster and was gone.

Gerard had walked around the dumpster and decided he would head home. The men around this corner weren’t used to seeing him and he was a bit better looking than the rest of the male prostitutes. The area was big on drugs and most of the male hookers on the street were either going through withdrawls or were high. Gerard wasn’t, his skin lacked the track marks, it was pale and flawless besides the mostly faded bruises on his face. He didn’t shake, he could talk well, and he wasn’t on the corner every night, he was rare.

Gerard slowly began going up the sidewalk when a man came up beside him. “Hey, baby. How much?” 

“Oh, no. I’m sorry,” Gerard said quietly. “I’m going home for tonight,” he said with a soft smile, still trying to keep his business. “I’ll be back some time next week though,” he smiled.

“Oh, come on,” the man said and gently grabbed at Gerard’s ass. “You’ve got cum dripping out of you for Christ sake,” the man laughed when he pulled his hand back, smearing the cum on Gerard’s jacket.

Gerard now felt uncomfortable and more than disgusted with himself. “Listen,” he said quietly, “I’ve had a really long night and I’m just tired,” he said with a small frown. His alter-ego was wearing off and now he was just himself and he felt horrible about all the things he had done. 

“Hey,” the man said and grabbed onto Gerard’s wrist with a firm hold. “It’s just one more,” he snapped and pulled Gerard into him.

“Stop it,” Gerard said and tried to pull his wrist away from the man. A slight bit of panic hopped into his throat when the man’s grip didn’t budge. “I said, ‘no,’” he hollered and tried pulling away harder. 

“Bitch,” the man snapped and grabbed at Gerard’s other wrist. The more Gerard struggled to pull away the more than man pulled him closer. 

“Hey! He said, ‘no!’” Gerard heard and felt the man back off him a little. “Why don’t you back the fuck off?!” 

Gerard turned and saw Frank standing behind him. He had on his regular, thick jacket, and his thick duffle bag hanging by his side. Gerard quickly walked over to Frank and stood behind him a little. Frank was shorter than him, especially since Gerard was wearing six inch heels but Gerard felt safer behind him.

“I’m sorry, man,” the guy said and held up his hands like he was innocent. “I was just checking him out,” the man said with a bit of a snap.

“Well, he doesn’t want to be checked out. He’s fucking tired! Leave him alone,” Frank snapped and the man glared before he walked away. Frank turned to Gerard with a bit of a crooked, smile. “What are you doing down here?” Frank looked Gerard up and down. 

Gerard looked himself up and down, signifying to Frank that he was clearly selling himself. “What are _you_ doing here?” Gerard asked, seeming confused. 

Frank patted his duffle bag with a bit of a smile. “Doing the rounds. This place is busiest on Fridays, there’s a lot of people out,” Frank said honestly. “One of my friends told me about it,” Frank said with a small smile. “They rely on me now, for clean needles, and everything,” Frank said honestly. “And, I was just meaning, you’re not normally around these streets.”

“Oh,” Gerard said and he smiled a little because Frank did seem like a decent guy. “No, I just... I needed money and...like you said, it’s busy on Fridays,” Gerard said with a little, crooked smile. 

“That’s true,” Frank said gently but smiled at Gerard. A girl came up to Frank and was shaking horribly, she was begging him for clean needles. “Here, babe,” Frank said quietly and handed her a few packs of them. She thanked him and kissed him on the cheek before hugging him tightly and slowly limping off. 

“So,” Gerard said shyly, “how did you get started doing this?” He shifted from one foot to the other before he swirled a little on his heel and looked back to Frank, nodding for him to follow. 

Frank smirked at Gerard’s cute little smile and his converse matched the steps of Gerard’s heels. “Uh, my father was a rich asshole who ruined people's lives so...I’m doing penance,” he said with an awkward smile. 

“What does that have to do with you though? That’s not on you,” Gerard said as he looked to Frank. He gently nibbled on his lip and he realized he was enjoying this. He was walking with someone, his own age, and just talking, just talking, and it felt so nice. Even if he was dressed up like a streetwalker. 

“My...My mother,” Frank said quietly, “...I just...another time.” Frank kind of brushed it off and waved his hand and Gerard nodded, respectfully leaving it. “What about you? Family?” Frank looked over to Gerard.

Gerard looked into Frank’s eyes and he wanted to say it, he wanted to say it so bad. _”I have a brother,”_ Gerard thought it but he couldn't get himself to say it. He looked up to Frank and was about to lie when he was interrupted by another person coming up and asking Frank for needles. He chose this moment to change the subject. 

“My feet are killing me,” Gerard sighed out and he stretched a little. He really believed his toes were gone, lost to lack of blood. He sighed out weakly and figured he had another ten miles to walk. 

“Coffee?” Frank said with a smile. “My treat,” he added as he pointed up ahead at a coffee shop. 

Gerard was going to shake his head but when he looked to Frank’s smiling face he found himself smiling back. “Yeah, okay,” Gerard smiled and nodded but then he looked down over his outfit and kind of cowered back into himself. “I...I’m not dressed right,” he said quietly. He didn’t quite figure someone like Frank would want to be seen with him in a place outside of alleyways, especially when he was so blatantly a prostitute. “I don’t...I don’t wanna embarrass you.” 

“You could never embarrass me,” Frank said, seeming confused as to why he would be embarrassed to be seen with Gerard. 

“Well, you are taking me out tomorrow,” Gerard said, reminding him. “Maybe it’s bad luck to go out the night before,” Gerard added thoughtfully. 

Frank smiled a bit at him before he opened the door to the coffee shop and held it for Gerard. He smiled when he saw Gerard blush and he said a quiet thanks to Frank. 

“What will you have?” Frank asked and when Gerard just shrugged in a shy manner he nodded. “I’ll just get you something. Why don’t you rest your feet?” 

“Okay, thank you,” Gerard said quietly and he sat himself at one of the booths and sighed out in relief as he felt like he could finally feel his toes again. 

Gerard kept his head down but he let his eyes glancing up and he watched Frank. Frank seemed...Well, Gerard didn’t quite know how Frank seemed, he couldn’t put his finger on it but he liked him, so far. He had met many men and most lost his interest in under half an hour. He had met the other male multiple times and each time had ended well. 

Frank seemed well balanced, thoughtful, and decent. It had been a long time since Gerard had met someone with those three qualities

Frank came over with two coffees and set one in front of Gerard. “I hope you like it,” Frank said as he sipped his own. “I don’t know what you like but I just got you what I normally get,” he said as he took the strap from his duffel and moved it over his head. 

Gerard took a small, curious sip before he just relaxed all over. He missed coffee more than anything, it had been one of his favorite things, not too long ago it seemed. He nodded. “I like it. Thank you,” he hummed as he slipped one of his feet out of its heel and crossed his legs. He slowly flexed his toes, now that they were free, and slipped one hand under the table and rubbed at them.

“Don’t worry about it,” Frank said with a soft smile as Gerard seemed to be relaxing. He knew Gerard was tired and he hoped the coffee and the break would make his trip home easier. Frank didn’t have his car with him, so he knew he couldn’t bring Gerard home but he hoped to walk him there. 

“Oh,” Gerard purred out as he leaned back into the comfy booth and rubbed at his throbbing toes. “It feels so good to just sit,” he breathed before he let out a little yawn and then rubbed at his eyes. “I’m so tired,” he squeaked out hopelessly before he sipped more of his coffee. 

Gerard rested his head back and was tempted to drift off for a moment but then he was horrified. Frank was sitting here watching him just slouch and fall apart. Frank was still a potential man for Gerard to hook up with, get to pay for him and Mikey, he had to pull himself together.

He subtly cleared his throat and sat up a little before he leaned over the table and sipped his coffee. “So, what do you do for fun?” Gerard asked this and tried to flirt a little.

Frank could pretty much see Gerard go from calm and relaxed to tense and showy. Frank just smiled a bit, he knew that Gerard was probably unsure and nervous. 

“Um, I work at a soup kitchen on the weekends,” Frank said with a bit of a smile. It really was something he enjoyed and had fun doing. “I meet awesome people there,” Frank said with a smile before he sipped his coffee. 

“Jesus, Mother Teresa,” Gerard said with a small smile. “So how do you make money if you do all this volunteer work? If I can ask,” Gerard added the last bit, hoping he could find out more about Frank’s income, he wanted to know that it was stable. 

“Oh,” Frank said and kind of shrugged. “When my dad died…I was his only heir so I got way too much money,” he said and just kind of shrugged his shoulders again. “So I figured why not use it to do some good?” 

“But, you invest it, right? How else can you sustain all your spending?” Gerard asked, he knew he was pushing a bit but he needed to know that Frank was going to be a smart choice for him. If Frank didn’t have the money to keep him and Mikey cared for, he couldn’t keep seeing Frank, he had to find someone better. 

Frank kind of raised his eyebrow at Gerard when he inquired further on his money. “I don’t think money’s all that important,” Frank said softly and shrugged. “Money is...Money is fleeting. It promotes greed and envy. Why would anyone want to worry so much on something that causes so much misery and pain for other people?” 

“It might be that but it is certainly necessary,” Gerard stated with a bit of a snap. He just wanted Frank to answer the question. 

“I guess, if you want it to be,” Frank said with a tiny shrug and he sipped his coffee.

“If you…,” Gerard stopped himself and he uncrossed his leg, putting his heel back on. He stood himself up and stayed at the end of the table, glaring down at Frank. “If it wasn’t, I wouldn’t be here in a fucking miniskirt and a Goddamn corset, sucking dudes off in a fucking alley! It must be easy to say when you live in this fucking world and have so much money you can just not work or doing anything! Living your entire life as a spoiled, entitled, only child!” Gerard grabbed his coffee and shoved it at Frank, squeezing it so that the lid popped off and the coffee poured all over Frank. 

Frank shouted in pain and stood, wiping it off him as best he could. Gerard flinched back a little, waiting for Frank to hit him but Frank didn’t, he just looked at him with a slightly angered look. “What’s wrong with you?”

“I guess it is fucking bad luck to go out the day before a date because I won’t be seeing you tomorrow,” Gerard snapped and turned on his heel, leaving the cafe. 

“Hey! Hey!” Frank said and quickly came out behind Gerard but he didn’t stop walking away. Frank put the duffel bag back over his shoulder as he followed Gerard easily. He now felt the burning, hot coffee freezing on his jacket and shirt.

“I’m not talking to you,” Gerard said and looked away from Frank. He felt himself bristling and he just wanted to go home and curl up with Mikey. He was tired and he just wanted to sleep. Though, he did note and was a little surprised, that Frank hadn’t grabbed his arm. Most men always grabbed him and forced him to stop and look at them, he hated it. 

“Fine, don’t talk! Listen,” Frank snapped back at Gerard’s own snippy voice. “I know you’re angry but I’m angry too! A guy I thought was actually decent and that I wanted to go out with turned out to just want my money and poured a burning hot coffee all over me!”

“I did not just want your money!” Gerard shot back but continued to look forward and ignored Frank’s glances. 

“Then why is that all you asked about? You didn’t ask me about who I am, you only asked about my money and how I have it,” Frank said as he followed beside Gerard who kept walking quickly. “I want to go out with you,” Frank said as he looked to Gerard. “I really do but I need to know you don’t just want my money.”

“I don’t!” Gerard lied and looked to Frank but he couldn’t deny that this guy was different. He’d never met someone like him before. He knew he would have to make something up for Frank to believe him so he went with something relatable. “I just…,” Gerard looked down, forcing himself to look sad, “usually guys only want one thing from me. I just…I don’t know how relationships work. We usually only talk about sex, money, and the basics.” Gerard just sighed out quietly and looked down. He hated being so fake but he didn’t know what else to do, he had messed things up with this guy and he needed to fix them. He tried to ignore how true his statement was though.

Frank looked to Gerard sadly but he gently nudged his shoulder with his own. “I know you’ve probably heard this before but I’m not like that,” Frank said quietly. “I just, I really want to take you out.” 

“Why?!” Gerard knew he shouldn’t but it bothered him. Why was this guy going through so much trouble? What was it that was making Frank come after him in such a way? 

“I just...When I get something in my mind, I have to do it,” Frank said with a bit of a smile at Gerard. 

“Oh, so you want to _do_ me?” Gerard snorted and rolled his eyes as he was now only about twenty minutes from his house, he just couldn’t wait to see Mikey. 

Frank sighed a little and stopped walking, holding up his hands innocently. Gerard found himself stopping after a few more steps and turning to look at Frank who remained unmoving. There was a silent knowing in the air and it made Gerard a little sad.

“I’m sorry,” Frank said quietly and just shook his head. “I get it,” Frank added and turned down the sidewalk, walking in the opposite directions of Gerard. 

“W-Wait? Where are you going?” Gerard found his mouth moving before he realized it but he found that he really didn’t want Frank to just walk away like this. 

“I’m going home,” Frank said, turning to look at Gerard but he was still walking backwards, walking away. 

“W-What about our date?” Gerard questioned shyly as he looked down, feeling an odd sadness in him spread, knowing there probably wouldn’t be one now. 

Frank spread open his jacket with his hands in his pockets. “You’ve already made up your mind,” Frank said with an unreadable face and a shrug. “It was doomed from the start. I’m a mean guy who only wanted one thing,” he said and Gerard frowned. “To get to know you,” he added before he shook his head and turned, walking straight again. 

Gerard frowned as he watched Frank walk away from him and he really wanted to go after him but he didn’t. This was all stupid, he knew it to be because no guy was worth all this trouble.

* * *

“Gee?” Mikey’s voice was quiet and sleepy as he felt someone crawl into bed behind him and hug him close.

“Hey, baby,” Gerard whispered quietly and kissed the back of Mikey’s head. He pulled Mikey close to him as he slowly relaxed.

He had come home, taken a cold shower, since there was no oil, and now all the money he had made was in the coffee can under his bed. The little heater had kept the room at a decent temperature but the rest of the house had been freezing. 

“I’m sleepy,” Mikey huffed but rolled over and cuddled into his old brother’s chest. He yawned and Gerard smiled at how warm Mikey felt. “Did you bring home food?”

Gerard was quiet and he felt his eyes water a little, he had forgotten. “No, baby. I’m sorry,” he squeaked out and pulled Mikey closer. “I’ll go get you something,” Gerard said and sat up, trying to think of where he could even get food nearby as it was so late.

“No, stay,” Mikey whispered and pulled his brother closer. “I want to sleep now,” he hummed out. 

“I love you,” Gerard said as he held Mikey close to him and kissed the top of his head. “Tomorrow, we’ll go out and I’ll get the heat fixed and we can get some lunch,” Gerard promised as he rubbed Mikey’s back softly. “Would you like that?”

“Mm,” Mikey hummed with a content smile. “Can we get burgers at the diner?”

Gerard smiled, “And chocolate milkshakes?”

“Yeah,” Mikey hissed with an excited smile, even with his eyes still closed and half asleep. 

“Good,” Gerard whispered. “Get some sleep, Mikes.”

“Okay,” Mikey said tiredly. “Oh, I love you too,” Mikey hummed and he nuzzled into Gerard.

“Nuh-Night,” Gerard hummed and only got a soft noise in response. He smiled and kept his brother close to him. He knew that it didn’t matter how many bad things happened to him, he would always have Mikey.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updates! 
> 
> Oh, Gerard.
> 
> Hope you like it! 
> 
> Forgive any bad editing. I suck and have been working like crazy!


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shout out to ["firefoxxy"](http://archiveofourown.org/users/firefoxxy/) & ["2Human4Nature"](http://archiveofourown.org/users/2Human4Nature/)! Both users have given me massive love and comment on absolutely everything. You both can ask me for a story anytime!
> 
> Bonus Shout out to ["OwlHooots"](http://archiveofourown.org/users/OwlHooots/) for showing me how to link/tag people. Haha!

Gerard huffed out with a little laugh as Mikey was clinging to his back. Mikey had gotten a little winded as they had walked home from the diner so Gerard had decided to carry him back, even with his side still a little bruised. They had eaten their burgers, drank their milkshakes, and had enough fries for five people. Gerard couldn’t believe how bloated he felt since he hadn’t eaten in days. 

“I’ve had fun, Gee,” Mikey said with a smile as he nuzzled into his older brothers neck. He was always happy to spend time with Gerard and today had been perfect. 

“I did too, Mikey. Thanks for coming out with me,” Gerard said as he started skipping a little with Mikey on his back, just to make him smile a little more. 

Mikey giggled as he kept himself close to Gerard. When they got to the door of their house Gerard finally set Mikey down, only to get his keys out of his pocket. He was happy to feel heat when they got into the house. 

“Do you want to watch cartoons with me?” Mikey chimed loudly as he ran into the living room and jumped onto the couch. 

“Oh,” Gerard said as he stripped off his jacket, seeming like he was thinking. “I bet I could do that.” 

Mikey giggled as Gerard came over and scooped him up into his arms before he sat him in his lap. “You’re silly,” Mikey said with a giggle before he turned on the TV and got it to the right channel. 

The two sat curled up together on the couch for sometime. Gerard figured it was pretty close to perfect. Mikey was perched in his lap and they were both calm. Bills were paid, they were full, and Mikey was happy. This was all Gerard wanted in his life, Mikey happy and safe.

* * *

Gerard had made Mikey one of his microwave, kids dinners for supper and just sat close to him, sipping down his water. The two hadn’t done much else besides watch cartoons all day.

“You know,” Mikey said and looked to his big brother, “I had a good day.” He smiled and wrapped his arms around Gerard’s middle, letting his head rest on his chest. He really loved Gerard and decided that he would never be happy with anyone else as his older brother. 

Gerard smiled and Mikey’s words were a little overwhelming to him but he contained his emotions. He was just happy that they had gotten to spend the day together. “I did too,” Gerard said with a soft smile as he rubbed Mikey’s back.

The two were a little jumped when there came a soft knock at the door. No one ever came to visit unannounced, unless it was social services checking on Mikey or someone wanting money for a bill. 

Gerard’s heart was in his throat as he imagined the state coming to check on Mikey. He stood shakily and looked to his little brother. “Go to your room, okay? Don’t come out until I say so,” he whispered and Mikey nodded before he did. 

Gerard felt like his hands were clammy all of a sudden and he rubbed them against the thighs of his black jeans. He cleared his throat quietly as he came up to the door and had his hand on the knob but he made no movement as to open it.

“Who is it?” He asked and gently gnawed at his lip. He knew most of the time social services didn’t make trips to houses after five and it was almost seven, so he wanted to believe that this meant it wasn’t them. 

“Um...It’s Frank,” came a shy voice and for a second Gerard didn’t process it but when he did he found himself desperately trying to get the door open. 

When his hand and the doorknob finally came to an agreement, Gerard opened the door a little and he in fact saw Frank standing before him. He was a little shocked and wasn’t sure what the other man was doing at his house. He swayed a little for a moment in his spot before he realized it was his turn to speak.

“W-What are you doing here?” Gerard tried to harden himself and cleared his throat as his arms crossed over his chest. He looked away from Frank’s face, glancing over his shoulder to his black mustang that was parked at the end of his walkway. 

“Gerard,” Frank said before he inhaled deeply, almost sighing inward. “I...I’m sorry about the other night. I was out of line,” Frank said and his mouth went crooked, like he might frown. 

Gerard now looked to the ground as he took in Frank’s words but still kept his arms crossed. He had figured that _he_ had been out of line, not Frank. 

“You weren’t,” Gerard said softly. “I shouldn’t have gotten so mad at you. You were just trying to be nice to me,” Gerard said with a frown. “So, I’m sorry.” 

Frank gave Gerard a small smile. “So, since we’ve both admitted that we were being huge assholes,” Frank said jokingly with a smile. “Can I please take you out on our date?” Frank smiled a little more now and the charm of it made Gerard have to smile back. 

“I…,” but then Gerard looked down and noticed his outfit and was a little horrified. None of his dates ever saw him without makeup or a perfect outfit on. Here he stood, his hair going in every direction, a baggy band shirt on, and not a trace of makeup on his face. 

“Oh,” he said and cowered back a little. “I’m not ready,” Gerard said and motioned to himself. “I didn’t know you were coming, I would have looked better for you.” Gerard frowned a little and bit his lip. 

Frank gave him a confused little smile and shook his head. “You look fine,” Frank smiled. “Gorgeous as always,” Frank said and motioned to Gerard up and down. He hid the frown that tried to appear on his face as he thought of what Gerard had said. He clearly thought that he needed to look a certain way to please Frank, like he would be embarrassed of Gerard. Frank remembered back to the last time he had seen Gerard and he had done the same thing when Frank had asked him to have coffee with him.

Gerard laughed a little, not believing anything Frank had said. “Well, let me just grab my jacket then?” Gerard thought over how he had to go talk to Mikey. He almost wished he could stay home with him but this would be good for him. He hadn’t tried going out with a guy for a while, and they needed the money. 

“That’s fine,” Frank said and smiled, happy that Gerard had agreed to go out with him. 

Gerard smiled and gave Frank a little nod before he closed the door. He thought over what was happening now that he wasn’t being watched. He really was in disbelief that Frank was on the other side of the door, ready to take him out but now he was kind of happy about it. Sure, he didn’t really care all that much about going out with Frank but it was nice that a guy was finally showing a minor effort for him. 

“Mikey,” Gerard whispered as he went into his brothers room. “Mikey, there’s a guy here who’s going to take me out. I didn’t know he was coming, it’s a surprise,” Gerard said with a bit of a grin. 

Mikey saw his brother’s excitement and he didn’t know if this meant that maybe, for once, he could go too. “I can come?!” Mikey asked and jumped up a little. 

“Shh!” Gerard held his finger to his lips, he hadn’t meant to jump toward Mikey so much but he had been so loud. Gerard paused for a second, as if that would tell him if Frank had heard Mikey. 

“N-No, baby, you can’t come,” Gerard whispered sadly, he always felt bad hiding Mikey but it was for the best. “He doesn’t know about you,” Gerard said quietly. “You know how it is,” Gerard frowned and just kind of looked down. 

“I know, Gee,” Mikey squeaked sadly but nodded. “You go and have fun,” Mikey said with a small smile. “I can finish watching my cartoons and I’ll be in bed by ten.” 

“Nine,” Gerard smiled as he walked out of Mikey’s room and to his own, putting on his nicer jacket. 

“Ten,” Mikey said quietly but giggled. Gerard smiled as he was applying a little eyeshadow to his eyelids with his finger. 

“Well, I’ll probably be home like normal,” Gerard said quietly as he stopped in the doorway, turning to look to Mikey who sat on his bed. 

“Is he coming back with you?” Mikey asked quietly, sheepishly. He feared that Gerard would be upset by him asking but he just wanted to know if he could come out of his room if he heard Gerard come home. 

“Probably,” Gerard said with a little frown, he didn’t quite feel in the mood for sex but he supposed he could get himself there. He knew he could just drink a lot over dinner to get himself ready. He was underage but hardly ever got carded with his older, rich dates.

“I love you,” Gerard said softly and walked over to hug Mikey softly, knowing he had kept Frank waiting long enough. 

“I love you too, Gee,” Mikey piped and nuzzled into his older brother. “Be safe,” he said quietly.

“I will. Always,” Gerard whispered and kissed the top of Mikey’s head. “Night, baby,” he smiled when Mikey said it back before he left the room.

He cleared his throat and fixed his clothes before he opened the door. “I’m ready,” he said to Frank as he stepped out onto the sagging, wooden planks of the porch and then locked the door behind him. “Sorry I took so long,” he added as they walked to the car. 

“Don’t worry about it,” Frank said with a smile as he opened Gerard’s door for him. 

“Oh,” Gerard smiled with a small blush that he hid. “Thank you,” he said before he sat himself in Frank’s passenger seat. 

Frank closed the door and while he walked around the car Gerard sighed out. He felt himself getting nervous and he had to calm himself, he always got nervous before a date. It was like interviewing a guy to be Mikey’s caregiver and someone he at least didn’t hate.

Frank opened the door and got in, he smiled over to Gerard. “I’m glad that you’re letting me take you out,” Frank said and Gerard almost felt nauseous because this guy was just going to be like the rest of them, an asshole. It only made things worse that Frank was actually getting Gerard excited for the date. He was getting set up for disappointment, he tried to remember how his last date had ended. 

“I’m glad that you came back and asked me,” Gerard said, telling himself that there was no truth behind what he was saying.

* * *

Frank had taken Gerard to a decent place, it wasn’t the best one Gerard had ever been to but he figured that Frank must not have given much of a care since he saw Gerard as just a lowlife hooker. He just sat himself down after Frank pulled out his chair and thanked him. 

“I hope you don’t mind,” Frank said and smiled a little, “I just...I don’t do very well in fancy places. I just figured that this place would be better.” Frank just wanted to admit this so Gerard didn’t think that he was being rude. He just really did bad in expensive places, he felt uncomfortable. 

“It’s fine,” Gerard said and forced a smile as he looked over the menu the waitress had given him. He just picked something he knew should be alright, he didn’t look at the price since he wasn’t paying. He also didn’t want to feel bad about it. 

“So,” Frank said with a small smile, “I’m really bad with this stuff.” Frank gave a weak laugh and clasped his hands, he was clearly nervous. “Do you have any hobbies?” 

Gerard figured he was going to be bored to death by the end of the night. “I used to draw a lot, I liked art, was going to go to school for it.” Gerard shrugged.

“Well, what happened?” Frank asked and he nodded to the waitress as she brought them their coffee. 

Gerard swallowed, he wasn’t sure what to say. _”My parents died. I have a little brother who had cancer and I could no longer afford it. I dropped out of school because I couldn’t keep up my grades and work three jobs which eventually just ended with me sleeping with guys and taking Mikey to his appointments and…_ The list went on and on so Gerard went with the one that was the easiest to explain. “My parent’s died in a car accident.”

Frank frowned. “I’m sorry,” Frank said and felt horrible for asking Gerard. He really was horrible at dating. He figured he was hopeless to no end. 

“It’s alright,” Gerard said with a small, sad smile. “It was a few years ago,” he shrugged again and kept his eyes on the menu even though he already knew what he was getting. 

“Alright, are you both ready to order?” The waitress asked and Frank’s attention turned to her and he made sure Gerard was ready before he ordered. 

_”Thank God,”_ Gerard thought, grateful that she had interrupted. He didn’t want to think about his parents anymore, it only made him sad. 

There was a good pause of silence after the waitress had left and Gerard just awkwardly played with his silverware. He knew he had to pull himself together, he could do this. Frank was like any other date, he had to flirt with him, and make him feel like Gerard was interested. Gerard bit his lip before he slowly sat forward and rested his elbow on the table and his chin in his hand. 

“So, do you have hobbies?” Gerard asked Frank back with a smile and he forced himself to look at Frank’s face.

“I just mostly volunteer but I do play guitar a little,” Frank said with a smile as he looked back to Gerard. 

“That’s cool,” Gerard said with a smile and genuinely meant it. Music was something that Gerard loved. He used to sing but that felt like a whole different life now. “I used to do plays in school. We did Rock of Ages once,” Gerard laughed as he remembered how fun it had been. “I had played Lonny, I was so pissed,” Gerard said and laughed more. “But I ended up loving it.” 

“I bet,” Frank laughed. “Can you sing?” Frank leant up a little more in his chair and this made Gerard smile because it meant he was more comfortable. 

“I used to,” Gerard confessed but waved his hand. “That was like a million years ago,” he said with a little laugh. 

“Well, I bet you sound great. Your voice is different,” Frank said with a smile.

“Different?” Gerard’s face scrunched up and he didn’t know if that was supposed to be an insult.

Frank could sense Gerard’s tension and instantly found better wording. “Unique,” Frank corrected with a small smile. “That was one of the things about you that got my attention, your voice,” Frank told him honestly. 

Gerard found himself smiling a bit and it was genuine, he told himself to pull back, he couldn’t go getting too attached to Frank. He knew Frank could end up just being an asshole and if Gerard got attached, it would hurt more than it normally did. 

“What else about me got your attention?” Gerard asked and his glance told Frank that he was inquiring to a specific area. 

Frank ignored Gerard’s subtle sway of the conversation and just kept it honest. Sure, he had met Gerard in heels, a miniskirt, and a corset but that didn’t mean all he saw was Gerard’s body. Gerard was a human being and needed to be treated like one. 

“Your eyes actually,” Frank said and he dropped his eyes from Gerard’s suggestive stare. “They’re...I don’t know they’re just different,” Frank said and took a sip of his coffee. He knew he wasn’t good with his words but it was true. Gerard’s eyes had depth and Frank wanted to know what hid under those beautiful irises. 

“There seems to be a lot about me that’s different,” Gerard said and shifted away from Frank a little. He looked down to the table, trying to ignore how Frank had turned him down a little. 

“I like different,” Frank said with a smile. “That’s why I asked you out,” Frank added, trying to make Gerard see that he wasn’t trying to be mean. 

“Well, I guess that’s a good thing,” Gerard said and was happy when the waitress brought their food, setting it on the table in front of them.

“More coffee?” She asked and Frank nodded with a small smile.

“Can I get a rum and coke?” Gerard asked and she nodded. He was grateful that this place had a bar and that the waitress hadn’t asked for his identification. 

Frank kept his eyes on his plate and made no comment on Gerard’s drink choice. He didn’t mind paying for it, he didn’t mind Gerard drinking, he just hoped it wouldn’t get out of hand. He did wonder if he was the cause of Gerard’s sudden drink choice. He figured he was saying all the wrong things to the man across from him who was clearly too beautiful for a guy such as himself.

They were both quiet for a little bit while they started eating. It didn’t take long for Gerard’s drink to come and once he had it ,he quickly sipped it down within ten minutes. He motioned for the waitress to bring him another one. 

He had finished his second one too quickly and it was after that he realized they had been stronger than he had thought. He felt a little tipsy but figured it would help him invite Frank into his house for sex.

“You good?” Frank said with a little laugh and Gerard smiled wide and nodded. “Bit strong?” 

“Yeah,” Gerard purred and leaned a little forward, towards Frank. “I think I should have one more and then we could head home?” Gerard quirked his eyebrows in a suggestive way. 

“If you’d like to,” Frank said with a small smile at Gerard. He just felt a little nervous about taking Gerard home now. 

Gerard did order one and he tipped it back and quickly swigged it all in three quick gulps before he set down the glass. He giggled as his head swirled a bit. He moved his chair over closer to Frank. 

“Hey, you,” Gerard said and his voice slurred a little on the last word, he giggled. “Wanna take me home?” He whispered in Frank’s ear before he gently nipped at Frank’s earlobe. He didn’t figure there was much of a point in fighting the inevitable and now that he was drunk he was getting himself in the mood. 

“I will,” Frank said with a small smile. He got the check from the waitress and Gerard noted that Frank tipped well, he liked that. 

Gerard stood up to leave with Frank and tripped a little on his chair, kicking it. He laughed obnoxiously loud in the little restaurant when Frank caught him, he noted a few people staring at them. “I’m sorry,” Gerard slurred to Frank but he couldn’t stop himself from smiling and he didn’t know why. 

“You’re fine,” Frank said with a small smile. “Come on,” Frank said softly and brought Gerard out to the car.

Gerard took this opportunity to press himself against Frank when they got to the car. “You’re hot,” Gerard said with a giggle and he pressed his mouth to Frank’s neck, noting a new tattoo that he hadn’t noticed. It was a scorpion or something like that, Gerard wasn’t sure, and didn’t much care to know. He felt Frank tense a little against his mouth and he smiled. 

“Hey, let’s get you home,” Frank said with a small smile, pulling Gerard back from him. 

“Yeah,” Gerard said with a watering mouth, he wanted to suck Frank off right here in the parking lot but he stopped himself. “Take me home,” he breathed and pressed a wet kiss to Frank’s cheek. 

Frank opened Gerard’s door and helped him in before he got in and started driving back to Gerard’s house. He saw Gerard’s head lulling a little from side to side. 

“You’re so cute,” Gerard cooed and he leaned over, palming between Frank’s legs with a smirk.

“Uh…,” Frank jolted his leg uncomfortably, so that Gerard’s hand moved away from the crotch of his pants. 

Gerard made an uncontent noise as his head was spinning. Gerard had gotten himself ready for Frank to fuck him and he wanted to start now. It was the only thing lingering in his swirling mind. He hadn’t drank in a while and it was showing. 

“We’re almost home,” Frank said, trying to keep Gerard’s hand at bay. He didn’t think it right to let Gerard touch him when he had been drinking, especially when he didn’t know him that well. It would feel wrong to Frank and he didn’t want to be like every other guy Gerard had been with, that just wasn’t something he would do.

It was only another ten minutes before Frank pulled up outside of Gerard’s house. Gerard got out and only stumbled a little. He normally didn’t get as drunk as he was and he was cursing himself a little, he hoped that Frank wouldn’t mind.

Frank was walking with Gerard to the door, making sure that he didn’t fall along the way. Gerard dug into his pockets and got his keys out with a little difficulty. “I’m gonna ride your dick, so hard,” Gerard said heatedly and leaned in to kiss at Frank’s mouth but ended up with his open mouth against Frank’s cheek. 

“Hey,” Frank said softly and carefully pressed Gerard back. “You’re a little drunk,” Frank said with a small smile. “I just...maybe we shouldn’t do anything right now,” Frank said as Gerard shifted and nearly fell over but was caught by the door and Frank’s hand that had grabbed his forearm.

“No, baby, it’s okay,” Gerard assured and got the door open finally. “Yeah,” he whispered to himself as he pushed it open a little, proud that he had managed. 

“I’m going to go home,” Frank said with a little frown. “But I did have fun. I’d like to see you next Saturday,” Frank said with a little smile, seeming a little nervous. 

“No, come in,” Gerard breathed heatedly and grabbed Frank’s hand. He brought Frank’s hand to the crotch of his jeans and pressed against his warm body. “Can you feel how excited you make me?” Gerard breathed against Frank’s ear with a little moan as his erection was brushed. 

“I’ll pick you up Saturday, at six,” Frank said with a small smile and pulled his hand away, trying to ignore how it had felt to cup Gerard’s package in his tight jeans. He started to walk away. He had to get out of there, Gerard’s dirty mouth and body was swaying Frank a little. But he knew he wouldn’t be _that_ guy, he had more respect for Gerard. 

Gerard’s face scrunched up in confusion as Frank was walking to his car. “But...But what about tonight?” Gerard leaned back against the doorframe of his house, wanting Frank to come back and touch him again. 

“I had fun,” Frank said with a little smile. He got into his car and Gerard was still confused as he watched it drive away.

“Fuck,” he whined as realization hit him. His erection was still throbbing in his pants and he huffed. He stumbled into the house a little before he shut the door and grumbled. He went down the hall to his bedroom and stripped his clothes. This felt wrong though, there wasn’t another person with him, and in the back of Gerard’s mind, Frank was lingering. He was pretty sure he had just fucked up his date big time but he was too out of it to care.

He just had to make himself feel better. His mind was so foggy and he just wanted a release to calm down. He got himself into his bed and laid down. 

“Yeah,” he breathed as he pulled his aching cock out of his pants. “Ah,” Gerard weakly inhaled as he stroked himself with shaky breaths. In his drunk mind, he wasn’t alone, Frank was here. The shorter male was stroking him with his tattooed fingers, kissing at his neck. “Oh,” Gerard whimpered as he tugged at his tip, he began to pant harder. 

His head was all a swirl as he thought of how he had planned on riding Frank. He then had a brief moment of wonder when he thought of Frank naked. He wanted to know just how much ink was on the man's body, Gerard had always been fascinated by tattoos.

“Aw, yeah,” he breathed quietly and he jerked his hips a little. His breathing was breathy, whines and he bit his bottom lip when he felt himself growing close. “Oh, fuck me,” he whispered as he closed his eyes and spread his legs, imaging Frank between them, fucking him raw. 

Just the image and thought of being fucked in his ass brought him over the edge and he fussed loudly as he milked his cum onto his stomach. He panted and dazedly rubbed his cum into his skin. 

He then rolled over, too tired and drunk to put himself away, and hugged his pillow close. He rested his head on it, pretending it was the other man’s chest. “Night,” Gerard hummed to himself before he passed out alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> O.O 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed it!  
> 


	9. Chapter 9

Gerard knew he was asleep and judging by how heavy his head already felt he didn’t want to wake up. He decided to continue laying down on his front with his eyes closed, even after he couldn’t deny the fact that he was awake. He huffed out against the pillow that his face rested on and just whined to himself, having a moment of self pity. 

Gerard’s mind was replaying last night because he was having a brief moment, from his tired state, of confusion. He was trying to think of where Frank could have gone. His heart fell a little as he figured that Frank must have snuck off before Gerard woke up, another one night stand but then he remembered.

He groaned and pushed his hand against his face, pushing his hair back messily. He remembered taking Frank’s hand and putting it on his dick and pressing against him. Then he remembered Frank awkwardly shifting away from him.

Gerard groaned again but louder this time as he forced himself up and saw his flaccid cock still hanging out of the front of his briefs. “Fuck,” he mumbled lazily and put himself away. 

He slowly shifted out into the hallway and squinted at the bright light coming from the living room. He brought his hand up to rub at his eyes as he yawned and leant against the wall a little before he walked towards the end of the hallway.

He saw Mikey sitting at the table, eating a poptart. “Hey, buddy,” he whispered and kissed the top of his head. He squinted his eyes more as the bright sunlight was coming through the kitchen window. He pulled the blind down and huffed again before rubbing at his eyes, trying to wake them up.

Gerard scratched at his belly before he realized he was scratching at his cum that had dried there. “I’m going to go shower,” he said quickly, walking by Mikey. 

Mikey watched Gerard stumble to the bathroom in his briefs and waited to hear the shower start before he stood up. He slowly tiptoed down the hallway and peeked into Gerard’s bedroom, expecting to see another guy in the bed but there wasn’t one. He frowned a little, he figured Gerard had had another bad night. 

Gerard stood under the spray in the shower and was trying to remember last night and forget it all at the same time. He could remember most of it but once he started swigging his drinks, things got a little fuzzy. 

He remembered Frank saying he had, had fun and that he would see Gerard next Saturday at six. Gerard bit his lip but he couldn’t deny the little smile that was sneaking across his lips. Frank still wanted to go out with him, even after he made an ass of himself. He had to admit, there was definitely something about Frank that he just couldn’t put his finger on but he liked it.

Then again, he wasn’t sure if he was happy or a little upset that Frank hadn’t slept with him last night. He was happy that he hadn’t because it would have made him like all the guys Gerard went out with but then again...every guy did want to sleep with him. Why didn’t Frank?

Gerard shook his head, knowing his thoughts were a little conceited. He found himself humming a little though because he had another date with Frank on Saturday and there weren’t a lot of past relationships that had made it to two dates. His record was five, he made himself promise that he wouldn’t get excited or even slight attached to Frank until they had gone out six times. 

“Gee?” Mikey asked for his brother through the shower curtain and heard him respond quickly, like he had been jumped. “Did you…,” Mikey didn’t know if he should ask. “Did you have a good date?” 

Gerard thought over it for a moment before he smiled a bit. “Yeah, Mikey. I did,” he said, happy he could finally tell his little brother that he had had a nice time when he went out without having to lie. “He was really...He was nice,” Gerard said as he rinsed his hair. 

“Really?” Mikey asked and did his best to hide his surprise but had failed. “Did you tell him about me?” Mikey added this last question, half hoping that the guy was nice enough to know about him too and still like Gerard. 

“Uh…,”Gerard stalled and was trying to think up a quick way to spare Mikey’s feelings. He couldn’t lie to him because he would still have to hide when Frank came around to pick Gerard up. He just didn’t want Mikey thinking there was something wrong with him or that Gerard was embarrassed of him. 

“I...I’m waiting to tell him,” Gerard said and was cautious with his words. “I just...If I tell him I know he’ll want to meet you and I don’t want you to get attached to him,” Gerard tried. “We could break up, you’d be sad.” 

“Oh,” Mikey said, frowning a little. He wanted to meet the guy though. He didn’t have any friends and it wasn’t that he didn’t love his brother but sometimes he wanted to hang out with someone else too. “That’s true,” Mikey said like he understood. “I’m going to go watch cartoons.” He slowly left the bathroom. 

Gerard shut the water off and pulled back the curtain once Mikey had left and stepped out. He grabbed up his towel and pushed it to his face, muffling a groan of frustration. He looked at himself in the mirror and leaned in closely. 

“You’re going to find someone for him and they’ll be perfect,” Gerard said to his reflection quietly. “I don’t care if you hate him, I don’t care if he beats you. I...Just make Mikey happy,” he said to the person looking at him. “Fuck,” he whispered and looked down to the towel in his hands. He sighed and started drying his hair.

* * *

Gerard had a few days to spend with Mikey. Bills were paid and on Friday he was going to meet up with the guy he had sucked off in the alley. He knew he’d get six hundred for that and he’d be covered for the rest of the monthly bills, it was nice not to worry about money for once. 

He kept himself curled right up with Mikey in the living room, watching cartoons, and staying in his pajamas. He was dozing off with his nose nuzzled into Mikey’s soft, little tufts of hair when he felt the young boy press back into him. He tightly wrapped the boy up in his arms and pulled him close.

“I’ve got you,” Gerard breathed, his warm breath covering Mikey’s ear and cheek. “You’re alright,” he said to his little brother who’d been dozing with him. 

Mikey sometimes had a hard time getting to sleep. He would lay down and everything would be fine, he wasn’t scared of sleeping. But sometimes when he was beginning to doze off, his mind would play sick tricks on him and he would jolt a little and become scared. 

Gerard had mentioned it to Mikey’s doctor and they had suggested that Mikey talk to a specialist about it. It had taken a few sessions and more money than Gerard had, had but it had been mostly sorted. The doctor had told him there really wasn’t a way to fix it. 

Mikey had been just falling asleep when the car his parents had died in was hit. He had jolted upright in fright from the sudden impact and had then been knocked out. The therapist figured there was a connection in Mikey’s subconscious, there was no fixing it. The man just said that hopefully, someday it would go away, when Mikey was over it. 

“I’m sorry, Gee,” Mikey squeaked and rolled over, nuzzling into his older brother’s warm chest. There was silence for a moment before Mikey spoke again. “I miss mom and dad,” he whispered and saw his older brother’s eyes open and look down at him.

“I know,” Gerard said quietly. “I miss them too,” he looked down a little and found a frown on his lips. “They loved you so much,” Gerard whispered as he brushed his fingers through Mikey’s thin, patchy hair. 

“I know,” Mikey said quietly. “They loved you too,” he said to Gerard before he hugged his older brother and closed his eyes a little. “Mom always told me I was lucky to have you,” Mikey confessed quietly, he knew that he was lucky, now more than ever. 

Gerard was a little confused by this, Mikey had never told him. “She told me about all the times you donated blood for me and when you gave me your bone marrow,” Mikey said sadly. He remembered how bad that had hurt and he thought of Gerard doing it for him when he didn’t have to.

“She wasn’t suppose to tell you that,” Gerard said quietly. He had done all those things for Mikey silently, he didn’t need his brother knowing. He smiled sadly as he thought of his mother, it was never like her to let a good deed go unappreciated. 

“I’m glad she did,” Mikey said softly and nuzzled his face under Gerard’s chin. 

“I just...It was nothing Mikey. I just wanted to take all your pain away,” Gerard said sadly. “I wish it had been me instead of you,” he confessed quietly. “I just saw all the pain you went through and how badly you hurt and I wanted to take your cancer away from you. I would have taken it for you if I could have Mikey.” 

“I’m glad it was me and not you,” Mikey said quietly and Gerard looked down to him with a confused expression. Mikey giggled, “You’d be so ugly without hair.” 

“You little snot,” Gerard said but with a smile on his lips as he playfully tickled his little brother. He smiled as Mikey squirmed and shrieked in his grip. “You think I’m ugly, huh?” 

“No,” Mikey squeaked and giggled more. He nuzzled back into Gerard when he was done being tickled. “You’re pretty,” he teased. 

“Oh, I see how it is,” Gerard said with a smile and pulled Mikey close again. “Maybe I’ll shave my head just to prove how pretty I really am!” 

“No!” Mikey squeaked and giggled as he looked to his older brother.

Gerard smiled as he faced Mikey. He knew he’d never let anything happen to him, he couldn’t. He loved him so much that if he lost him he wouldn’t know what to do with himself. He would have absolutely nothing. 

“I love you,” Gerard whispered, being a little more serious now.

“I love you too, Gee,” Mikey said back and kissed his brother’s cheek before he nuzzled back into him.

Gerard smiled softly as Mikey drifted off in only a few moments and this time, he stayed asleep.

* * *

Gerard had gotten Mikey to bed early and was now sneaking out of the house. It was almost nine, he knew he was late but he hoped that man would still be waiting for him at the alley when he got there. He walked as fast as he could in his tall heels and did his best to keep his gaze down when he passed a few sketchy characters. 

It took him twenty minutes to get there and he sighed out with little pants when he could finally hold still. His feet were already aching, he wanted the man to hurry up so he could just lay on his back and kick the shoes off. He pulled his skirt down a little since it had ridden up in the back; he was missing his pajama pants badly at this moment.

“Hey, you made it,” Gerard turned to the voice and saw the man from the week before. He smiled cutely and tilted his head. “So, I’ve got the room all ready for us. Oh, here,” the man said and pulled out the six hundred dollars he had promised. Gerard tried not to take it from the man too quickly before he placed it in his little bra. 

“Great. I’m ready,” he smiled and tried to look appealing even though he really wasn’t into it tonight. His sex drive seemed to be dropping recently but he was getting into character, it helped. If he told himself he was acting the part of a cock hungry whore, it made things easier, and he usually didn’t feel too dirty until he had finally orgasmed. Then he was left to sit and think about all the things he had done. 

It didn’t take long to walk to the crummy motel but it felt like forever to Gerard who couldn’t wait to get out of his heels. The man motioned to the door with the number six on it and Gerard stopped beside it while the man got out the key and unlocked it.

“Ladies first,” he smirked as he looked Gerard up and down.

“Such a gentleman,” Gerard teased but rolled his eyes as he stepped into the room. The man came in behind him and closed the door before he clicked the light on. Gerard was greeted by four men in front of him and he jumped back a little. “W-What is this?” He turned to the man who had brought him. 

“My friends,” the man said with a little smile. “You only charge a hundred for a fuck, there’s only five of us, that’s a hundred extra,” the man said, showing his reasoning. 

“N-No,” Gerard said, feeling a lump forming in his throat as he looked to the other men. “I...I don’t do multiples,” he said honestly. “I’m sorry but I don’t think I can do this,” Gerard said and pulled out the money, holding it out to the man. 

Gerard tried not to shake as there was nothing but silence and the five men looked to him. They seemed to have ignored what he said entirely as they all took a step closer to him. He could no longer hold back the shaking and he cleared his throat a little, trying not to panic.

“Please, just take your money and I’ll go,” Gerard said, his voice laced with fear. 

“No, keep it and stay,” the man smiled. “Not like you have a choice,” he added. 

Gerard went to interject but one of the men grabbed him from behind and slammed him to the ground.

“Mmph,” Gerard groaned as his face ached from being pushed into the rough carpet that covered the floor. “Stop,” he hollered as he felt one of the guys reach under his skirt and bring down his tight panties. 

“No!” He sobbed as realization was setting in. Two guys were pulling apart his legs while another held his arms, he could feel someone pushing in between his legs. “No!” He screamed loudly.

“Shut him up,” the man between his legs hissed. “Give him something to help him calm down.” 

A man came in front of Gerard and pushed his dick against Gerard’s lips that instantly pursed and he shook his head away from it. The man harshly ripped at his jaw and painfully pushed at his cheeks until his mouth opened. Gerard let out a sob as the man’s tip pressed into his mouth right after another man had dropped a pill on his tongue. He felt the man's tip push the pill down his throat and he coughed a little but he had swallowed it, he whined and shut his eyes. 

“Suck,” the man grumbled as he pressed in a little more. Gerard refused and felt hot tears pouring down his cheeks. “I said, ‘suck’,” the man shouted and yanked at Gerard’s hair painfully before he slapped his cheek, harshly.

Gerard let out another sob before he found his mouth weakly sucking at the man. The man groaned and Gerard could hardly breath through his running nose and the man started bobbing Gerard’s head against his pulsing hips. 

“Fuck, yeah,” the man mumbled mindlessly. “He does have a nice mouth,” he commented to the man that had brought Gerard to them.

Gerard closed his eyes and told himself not to make a big deal about this. The more he struggled, the worse it would be. He feared that if he put up too much of a fight, that they might harm him, and take him away from Mikey. He knew he would have to pretend that he wanted this. Maybe, if he was good and behaved, they would be nicer and he could keep his money. He felt disgusting but he forced himself to bob his head and get a better suction on the man.

“Ha, whore’s getting into it,” the man said with an amused look down at Gerard’s head bobbing over his dick, he let out a breathy moan. 

“Yeah, he loves giving head,” the man behind Gerard said. “He just needs to relax,” the man assured.

Gerard felt a finger probe at his hole and made a little noise into the man’s heavy cock. He slowly tried to pull his legs up and the men cautiously let him, letting go of his ankles. He got his knees up a little to slightly raise his ass and he pressed back against the man's lubricated finger. He knew this was what he had to do to keep himself from being beaten, he had to want it, he had to lose himself.

“Yeah, you want something in your little cunt,” the man laughed at Gerard’s eagerness. Gerard hummed into the man’s dick and bobbed his head faster. The man pressed two fingers into Gerard and smirked at how easily the whore spread, he knew this hole was fucked, and often. Gerard dropped the man’s cock from his mouth to let out a throaty moan but he kept stroking the man’s reddening member, spreading his spit over it. 

“Yeah,” he whined and found himself bouncing back against the man’s digits as he started fucking him with his fingers. “Oh,” he fussed before he put his mouth back on the man’s dick in front of him and began sucking again.

* * *

“Oh, no more,” Gerard fussed as he laid with his back against one mans chest and another was laying over him. One dick was buried balls deep inside him and the man on top was gently trying to get his inside the cum filled hole. 

They had been fucking Gerard for hours, all taking their turns. Gerard hadn’t had a break yet and was nearly a babbling, cum covered mess. Things had definitely ended up in their favor. Gerard had turned into a full blown fantasy. He had fucked them all, sucked them all off, and now he was taking two cocks like a champ. 

His skin was red and his hair was messy and all over, drenched in his sweat from his excursion and cum from the different men. The man finally got his tip inside Gerard and he moaned before he sighed out. “Yeah, there...fuck,” the man breathed and slowly pushed in to the hilt, spreading Gerard open.

“Oh,” Gerard fussed and tossed his head back as he had his legs spread wide for the men. “Yeah,” he whined and tried to wiggle his hips, wanting the dicks that stretched him to fuck him. “Fuck me,” he whined desperately and tried to bounce a little, moaning as they nudged his prostate. 

Gerard was punch drunk from his multiple orgasms and all he knew was that his hole was so stretch and full of cum that he would feel it for days. He was keeping himself safe for now, stuck in the mindset of a mindless whore who just craved cocks to fill him and use him.

“You sure you’re ready, baby,” the man on top panted, teasing and he slowly curled his hips into Gerard but popped them to perfectly strike Gerard’s spot.

“Yes, yes, yes,” Gerard chanted and whined out. Both men started thrusting into him and he just laid back helpless onto the man under him. He spread his legs wider and stroked his hard cock. “Oh,” he whined pitifully and kept repeating it with each inward thrust to his prostate. 

“You like your little cunt all full, don’t you?” The man beneath him groaned into his ear before he nipped Gerard’s neck. The man reach down and with slight difficulty, pushed two fingers in roughly beside his cock, hooking them into Gerard’s stretched hole. 

Gerard shrieked and let out a sobbing moan as his body shook. “Yes! Yes, I do,” he sobbed as his body was overwhelmed with pleasure and he thought he was losing it. “I...I’m going to cum,” he cried out and his body jolted when their thrusts picked up and they were slamming his spot without mercy. He began to babble, drunk with his orgasm.

“Man, that fucking X has him going crazy,” the guy beneath him laughed.

Gerard’s eyes closed and he screeched as he came so hard he saw stars. “Oh,” he fussed as they continued to fuck his poor, used hole. He heard one of them grumble out a, “Fuck,” and the other just moaned as he felt them both add to the cum inside him. He hummed tiredly and shifted his hips. 

They both pulled out of him and he found himself laying on his side, dazed. He shifted a little and felt cum dribble out of his ass and down his cheek. “Let me see you, baby,” Gerard heard as a gentle hand on his hip guided him to lay on his back and he did. The hand gently pressed one of his legs back and he pulled the other back, putting his hands behind his knees.

He looked down between his legs when he felt fingers running over his wrecked hole, he shivered. His head felt so heavy and he let it lay back on the bed and closed his eyes.

The man between his leg was recording the cum that dripped from Gerard’s gaping hole, without the wrecked boy really noticing. He hummed contently before he slowly pushed his fist into Gerard and moaned. Gerard fussed a little when the biggest part of the man's fist was pushing passed his rim, even though they were all pretty sure he had finally passed out. 

“He even wants to be fucked in his sleep,” one laughed and it encouraged the guy between Gerard’s leg to continue.

He gently fisted Gerard’s hole and recorded it. They listened to Gerard mewl and whimper as the fist moved around inside him. He harshly pressed against the boys prostate and Gerard cried out and cum dripped from the tip of his cock. The man kept harshly fucking Gerard’s ass with his fist until Gerard’s belly was spackled with the cum he had milked from him. 

The man pulled his fist out and recorded Gerard gaping hole that was dripping with all the cum the man had moved around inside him, his hand was caked in it. He laughed as Gerard looked up to him between his nearly lidded eyes. 

“You liked that, huh?” He said with a smirk and smeared the cum on his hand onto Gerard’s thigh. Gerard nodded weakly. “Good,” the man whispered against Gerard’s lips before he kissed him. The man mindlessly stopped the recording on his phone and set it on the bed as he pressed against the thin body beneath him.

Gerard kissed the man back and licked into his mouth with a moan. It felt so nice to have a body close to him when he was so out of it. He hoped the man would stay with him so he didn’t have to sleep alone but as he thought it the man was pulling away from him. He whined a little unhappily.

The men all dressed and soon it was only the guy Gerard knew from the week before left in the room with him. “Stay with me,” Gerard whispered as he looked up to the man from his spot on the bed. He remained lying on his back, too tired to move. 

“Nah, baby,” the man said with a small smile. “But here, there’s an extra four hundred,” the man said with a smile. He knew Gerard had liked it and all his friends hoped to have him again in the future. They figured that if they paid him well he’d keep coming back. It was also a hopeful reassurance that Gerard wouldn't report them. He tossed the money onto Gerard’s cum covered stomach. 

“Don’t you want to...lay with me for a little while? We can fuck again,” Gerard tried, forcing himself to sit up a little, even though his body was begging to stay laying. He just wanted someone to stay with him, he wouldn’t feel safe being so weak and alone, his head was spinning. 

“Nah,” the man said. “Someone has to get the kids up for school in the morning,” the man walked over to Gerard with a smile. Gerard looked down, it was setting in now, he was beginning to feel so vile. “I’ll see you again though,” the man whispered before he leaned in and gently kissed the hooker who kissed him back. “Thanks. This was fun,” he added with a grin. “Also, the room’s only paid up till three. I was going to let you sleep here but someone needs it at three so....you’re going to have to leave soon,” he added quietly. “Night, babe,” he winked.

The door closed and Gerard was alone. The room was silent as he sat in the filthy sheets with money stuck to his stomach by his cum. Gerard looked down and let out a shaky sob before he brought his hands up to his face. He curled up into the fetal position, despite the ache in his backside, before he fell onto his side and cried.

“Oh, God,” he wailed and tried to wipe himself off but the sheets seemed just as filthy. “It’s okay, it’s okay,” he whispered to himself and forced himself to stand, wiping the crumpled bills from his stomach. He cried out a little in pain once he was fully standing and limped to the bathroom. They had been rough on him and now that the rush was gone it was more apparent. 

He got into the shower and began to roughly scrub at his skin. “Oh,” he sobbed out and curled up into himself. “No, no, no,” he cried and hid his face with his hands. He felt so filthy. He had been fucked by those five men in all those different positions and he had liked it, had made himself like it. They had all came inside him, he whimpered as he tried to clean his hole.

He was pulled from his thoughts when there was a knock on the door out in the room. He slowly forced himself to stand back up and bit his lip, stifling a sob when his hole ached and a pain shot up his spine. He grabbed a towel and held it to his chest, hiding himself from whoever was behind the door.

“Y-Yes?” he squeaked when he heard another knock.

“You need to get out of the room,” he heard a man say angrily. “Your times up!” 

“O-Okay! One minute,” Gerard said shakily and he slowly eased himself around the room. It took him too long to get dressed, he could tell by the way the man kept banging on the door. Gerard counted out his money and carefully pushed the grand into his little, stuffed bra. 

He went to the door and opened it to see a short, fat man before him. He figured it was the owner of the motel. “I’m sorry,” Gerard whispered and limped by the man, trying not to twist his ankle in his heels. His legs were shaking terribly and it was hard to walk. He found hot tears running down his cheeks from the pain but he bit into his lip and forced onward, walking through the cold streets. 

“Hey, Gerard!?” Gerard closed his eyes when he heard the voice. _’God, please? Not now. Go away,’_ Gerard thought and he was about to just break down as Frank appeared in front of him.

“God, are you alright? You don’t look so good,” Frank said quietly and Gerard could see the concern on his face. 

“I-I’m fi-,” Gerard tried but he felt dizzy and his legs gave out. He waited to hit the tar but he hit something softer and heard a deep voice groan.

“I’ve got you,” he heard quietly in his ear and he pressed his head weakly towards the voice. He felt himself become weightless all of a sudden and it was nice. He let his eyes drop closed as he felt safe and warm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> O.O 
> 
> Sorry this is so late! I've been working my three jobs and this week I seemed to live in my car! 
> 
> I hope you like it! It's extra long for ya!


	10. Chapter 10

Gerard stirred a little but he didn’t want to wake up completely yet, he was enjoying being asleep. Things were quiet, his mind was unaware of his body, and it just felt nice to float in nothingness for a moment. He was warm and there was a calming scent that surrounded him, he felt protected. It reminded him of the warm hugs he would get from his mother when he was younger. When he used to be upset or scared, his mother could hug him and everything would feel alright, he missed that.

He slowly opened his eyes and stared up to a ceiling for a moment before he realized it wasn’t his own. He glanced around and saw familiar deep, red walls. He blinked a few times, letting his brain catch up to what he was seeing. He now knew he was at Frank’s apartment. 

He also realized now that he wasn’t in his street clothes, he was in a baggy shirt that was comfortable and a soft pair of sleeping pants. He shifted a little under the warm blankets and then jumped a bit when he had turned to his side, he had felt pain in his backside and lower back, and Frank was laying in bed beside him. 

Gerard calmed for a moment as he was letting the pain subside but he looked to Frank. The other male was still resting and Gerard noted that Frank had kept his distance since he was laying on the opposite side of the bed. Gerard figured that he hadn’t even meant to fall asleep since he was still dressed and lying on top of the covers. 

Gerard smiled a little at Frank as he let out these tiny little snores that were adorable. He figured he would wait for Frank to wake up before he’d get out of bed and let himself rest back down. He thought of Mikey and hoped that he was okay. He hated leaving him home alone all night. 

Gerard glanced around the room as he laid back in the warm, expensive bed sheets. He tried imagining that Frank was actually his boyfriend and that he lived here with him. That they had picked out the sheets on the bed together and painted the room after fighting over reds for days. Gerard had let Frank win of course when Frank had kissed him until he couldn’t be angry with him anymore. Then after a slight paint fight the room was done, painted perfectly, and he would have fucked Frank on the floor of their new bedroom while they were surrounded by boxes with their things in them. Both speckled with flecks and drips of paint. Oh, Frank would look so good with that deep red all over his chest. 

Gerard blinked and the image of them both on the floor disappeared into the back of his mind where he told himself to forget about it. He often fantasized about what it would be like to be in a normal, serious relationship, to be loved. He gently chewed at his bottom lip as he nuzzled his cheek against the soft pillow beneath his head.

“Hey,” he heard the tired voice of Frank behind him. He turned his head and saw Frank rubbing his left eye with the palm of his hand. “I’m glad you’re alright,” Frank said with a sleepy smile and Gerard wanted Frank to lean down and kiss him with those lips. 

“Thank you,” Gerard said quietly back to Frank’s morning voice. “I’m sorry about this,” Gerard squeaked and he truly was. Frank had gone through too much trouble for Gerard in the month they had known each other. 

“Hey, I feel honored,” Frank said with a little joking smile. “I mean, assuming I’m the only guy you faint on,” he grinned and Gerard blushed a little. “You feeling okay?” He asked after, knowing that Gerard might be sore.

“I-I’m okay,” Gerard lied as his lower half ached with a constant pulsing. 

“Well, let me get you some coffee at least,” Frank said and he slowly stood with a yawn before he stretch. “I’ll be back,” he whispered and Gerard smiled sheepishly at him before he watched him go. 

Gerard wanted this. He wanted this so bad it made him sick. He wanted someone to worry for him and make him coffee and make him smile and laugh every morning. Gerard looked down helplessly, knowing the odds of him achieving a guy like Frank and keeping him were slim in his situation. He was a prostitute with a baby brother who was sick and Gerard’s full responsibility. He sighed out softly and just looked out the large windows in Frank’s room, seeing the city.

“Here we go,” Frank said when he returned a few moments later and Gerard turned, seeing Frank carefully hold out a coffee cup to Gerard. Gerard took it and gently nodded his head, showing his thanks. “I got you these too,” Frank said and Gerard held out his hand, confused before Frank dropped two, little pills onto his palm. “They’re painkillers,” he commented when Gerard eyed them.

“Thank you,” Gerard said before he tossed them into his mouth and carefully sipped his coffee, swallowing them down. He hummed contently and gently laid back on the pillow behind him. He was warm and comfortable and he had coffee, it was like paradise. 

“So,” Frank started and Gerard turned his head, looking to him. “Since I do believe you won’t be much up for our date tonight,” Frank said and wasn’t finished before Gerard was interrupting him. 

“No! I mean...I can go, I’ll be fine,” Gerard said and did his best to smile. He could ignore the ache and the pain for a date with Frank. He had gone out on dates before in pain for less men, he would do it for Frank. 

“Hey, don’t worry about it,” Frank said with a small smile on his lips. “I was going to ask if you’d rather stay here for the day?” Gerard glanced up to Frank at this. “We could curl up on the couch in our pj’s? Watch some TV? I’d make you dinner?” 

Gerard found a small smile creeping onto his lips. He liked the idea, it sounded like something that a couple would do. He was about to nod before he thought of Mikey and he found himself frowning and shaking his head. 

“I have to go home now,” Gerard whispered, trying not to seem sad. He really wanted to spend the day with Frank, get to know him a little. Plus, it was warm and nice at Frank’s apartment. 

“Oh,” Frank said and looked a little disappointed, he glanced down into his cup of coffee and nodded. “Alright,” he added before he stood up and walked over to a nice armchair that was in the corner. He bent down and grabbed up his shoes, starting to pull them on. 

Gerard slowly stood up and only winced a little but he forced his legs to slowly walk him over to Frank, until he was standing before him. “Can...Can we go out tomorrow?” Gerard wanted to go out with Frank, he really did, and he didn’t want him thinking otherwise. 

Frank finished pulling on his shoes and stood up, coming close to Gerard. “I have plans tomorrow,” he said with a little frown as he looked into Gerard’s deep hazel eyes. 

“I...I can stay,” Gerard tried, thinking that maybe he could just call Mikey to check on him. He was worried that Frank was pulling away now. “I don’t have to go home,” he lied and bit his lip. He really was worried about Mikey but he also worried about losing Frank. This was his only chance at getting a guy who was comfortable with money and was actually nice. Frank wasn’t loaded, Gerard guessed but he figured that he could get a job, to make extra. 

“Hey, hey,” Frank said softly and lightly took Gerard’s hand. “Monday?” Frank asked with a soft, little smile. 

“M-Monday..? Monday’s good,” Gerard said and he found a smile sneaking onto his lips. 

“I’ll pick you up at five? We can grab some dinner and there’s a concert downtown...I don’t know if rock is your thing but it’s a bar and…,” Frank cut off and just smiled wide as Gerard was enthusiastically nodding. “They’re underground a bit but they’re good. I’ve seen them before,” Frank added.

“It sounds perfect,” Gerard said with a big smile on his lips and he found himself leaning into Frank before he pressed a soft kiss to his cheek. Gerard hadn’t been to a concert since before his parents had passed. He used to see them all the time but now he couldn’t afford it. Even the ones that were just in tiny little bars.

“Great,” Frank smiled and he gently rubbed his thumb over the back of Gerard’s hand for a moment before he dropped it. “Uh, I can take you home,” Frank said, remembering that Gerard had to go, he motioned to his bedroom door.

“Uh...my clothes?” Gerard asked shyly and bit his lip. He didn’t want to go home to Mikey dressed like that but he didn’t have anything else to wear. 

“Oh, I washed them,” Frank said suddenly. “Hold on. I’ll get them,” he quickly left the room and went downstairs. 

Gerard sat himself on the bed for a moment before he realized something, Frank hadn’t bugged him to talk. He hadn’t asked Gerard to tell him what had happened or if he wanted to talk about it. Gerard didn’t want to talk about it, at all so he was kind of glad that it hadn’t come up. He figured that Frank had known he would be too shy. He tried not to think about how much he liked this guy already. 

“Here we are,” Frank said and handed Gerard his clothes in a bag. “Don’t worry about changing if you don’t want,” Frank added and put his hands into the front pockets of his jeans. “You can wear mine home if you’d like,” he said with a shrug. 

Gerard looked up to Frank and just wanted to hug him. Gerard felt repulsed even holding the bag of clothing at the moment. He was remembering the night before and how the clothes had been stripped from his body, how he’d been fucked in them. He just kind of looked down and sighed, he was embarrassed that Frank had washed them, he knew that they’d been covered in cum and other bodily fluids. He was trying not to let it bother him but as his thoughts swirled he found himself growing bitter and uncomfortable around Frank. He figured that the other male must be judging him because of the state he had been in. He also thought about how Frank had changed him and was bothered even more by the fact. He wondered if Frank had done something to him while he had been unconscious. 

“Hey,” Frank said softly and sat beside Gerard with a gentle sigh. “I know...I know that something happened last night and I can understand if you don’t want to talk about it, I’m the same way,” Frank said and Gerard shot a side glance at him. “But...if you ever do need someone to talk to...about anything, I’d listen,” he offered, quietly but sincerely. 

“I...I appreciate the offer,” Gerard said quietly and looked back to the rug, that was his only comment on the matter. Now Frank was asking him about it, maybe he wasn't so great after all. “I...I’d like to go home now,” he said quietly and stood, hugging the bag of clothes to him. He wanted his little brother, Mikey would make him feel better. He didn’t need Frank’s help, least that’s what he was telling himself.

“Alright,” Frank said and stood, leading Gerard to the door. He wasn’t sure if he had done something wrong. He could feel that Gerard’s tension was bristling and kept his distance a little. 

Gerard pulled his heels on as he stood waiting by the door. He didn’t have any other shoes to wear and he knew he could hide them from Mikey in the baggy sleeping pants if he had to. He also pulled out his clean jacket and put it on since it was cool outside. He hugged himself and just waited for Frank as he stared to the floor.

“Are you ready?” Frank asked as he came up to the door and Gerard just silently nodded before he opened the door and walked out into the hall. Frank sighed a little bit as he turned to lock the door to his apartment. He wasn’t sure what to do with the boy, he seemed so hot and cold with his moods.

Frank lead Gerard to his vehicle once they were in the car garage and held open his door for him. Gerard slid into the passenger seat without so much as a nod at Frank and just looked down into his lap. Frank chose not to speak and closed the door instead before he went around and got in, his teeth still nipping into his bottom lip. 

The ride home was mostly silent and when they got to Gerard’s house Frank parked the car and looked to Gerard. “Hey,” he said and Gerard glanced back over his shoulder from where he was already bailing out the door. “Do you…Do you not like me or something?” Frank had tried to just ask this question with an air of not caring all that much but the question had came out a little vulnerable sounding and he wanted to kick himself. He didn’t know what it was that made Gerard so unbalanced around him, so he figured that Gerard just might not like him very much. . 

Gerard paused for a moment and looked down after Frank had asked him. He wanted to quickly shake his head and tell Frank that nothing was wrong but he figured something must be wrong with Frank. Why did this guy care? Why was he being so emotional after only meeting up a handful of times and only going out on one date that had been a failure in Gerard’s eyes. The more Gerard’s feelings and questions built up the more frustrated he got.

“Jesus, you’re so creepy,” Gerard snapped finally before he stood and got out of the car, slamming the door. He started quickly walking up to his front door and was waiting for Frank to holler a response but there wasn’t one. Gerard glanced back over his shoulder to just see Frank sitting in his car for a moment, looking down at his own lap. Gerard thought about going back and apologizing but then he heard Frank’s car pull away and drive off. 

“Dammit,” he whispered and rubbed at his eyes. The motion had brought the long sleeve of the comfy, baggy shirt up to his nose, and Gerard could smell Frank on it. He now remembered that he was in Frank’s clothes and felt even worse. “I’m such an asshole,” Gerard said to himself as he took his heels off one at a time and crammed them into the bag Frank had given him before he opened the door. 

Luckily, Mikey wasn’t in the living room so Gerard had time to hide his bag before the young boy came running out of his room. 

“Where have you been?!” Mikey shouted and it took Gerard aback a little. Mikey never raised his voice to Gerard. 

“I...I had a date last night. I told you,” Gerard said quietly, explaining himself. He limped towards the kitchen and grimaced a little. He wasn’t sure if the painkillers were wearing off already or if sitting in the car for so long had made him sore.

“You said you would be back! You didn’t say you’d be gone all night,” Mikey snapped angrily at his brother before he walked over and hit his arm. “You didn’t answer my calls!” 

“Mikey! Don’t hit me! My phone was off!” Gerard screamed back. He was having a bad enough day already and his head was throbbing. “I don’t have to ask you when I have to be home! I’m the adult,” Gerard spat and walked around his little brother.

“Yes, you do!” Mikey screamed back and slapped Gerard’s lower back with his hand. Excruciating pain shot through Gerard and it boiled up inside him. He turned quickly and harshly slapped Mikey across the face in his moment of pain and anger.

Mikey laid weakly on the floor for a few blinks worth of time before the pain registered in his face and his heart. His face hurt when it scrunched up so that he could let out the sob that had built inside him, he curled up on the floor and hugged himself. His ribs hurt from hitting the hard, tiled floor and he weakly ran his fingers over them.

“B-Baby..,” Gerard gasped out as his own eyes leaked over and he knelt by Mikey. “Baby, I’m so sorry,” Gerard said hysterically and tried to pick Mikey up into his arms but was denied by Mikey pulling away from him. 

Mikey quickly ran down the hall to his room and slammed the door in Gerard’s face. “M-Mikey! Please?” Gerard cried and tried the door but it was locked. “Mikey, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean it,” Gerard whined into the door but there was no response.

“Fuck,” Gerard sobbed and hid his face in his hands. He slowly walked over to the couch and sat himself down on it. He looked to the hands that he pulled away from his face as they shook. The right one that had connected with Mikey’s face was red from the hard contact.

Gerard just fisted his hands into his hair and cried as he remembered how hard Mikey had fallen. The sob that had came from his little brother had broken his heart and made him want to swallow a gun. He knew that he had done so wrong and he felt like the biggest failure.

He knew Mikey had just been scared for him. He always told Mikey when he’d be gone all night. When their parents had died it had taken Mikey three months to let Gerard out of his sight. Even then he would have random panic attacks and be filled with dread that something had happened and Gerard had died. So Gerard knew that Mikey’s screaming and being upset had been his fear. He had probably been awake for hours, nervously pacing, and crying, wondering where Gerard was and if he was dead. 

Gerard looked down and he wondered if the doctors had all been right. Maybe Gerard should have found a family that could have taken good care of Mikey. Was he being selfish by keeping Mikey with him? In his moment of hysteria and his hand still stinging from slapping his little brother, Gerard figured he was very selfish. 

It was at this moment that Gerard realized that he wished he could take Frank up on his offer. He wanted to talk and he just wanted someone to listen, to hear all the troubles that were trapped inside him. The ones he couldn’t worry his poor little brother with because they were too heavy for a ten year old to bare. Gerard was so tired of keeping everything in, carrying everything on his own. 

Gerard realized, he had called Frank a creep, he probably wouldn’t be seeing him again. There would be no talking. There would be no picking out bed sheets and paint for their bedroom. There would be no kisses and sex on the floor of their new apartment. Frank wouldn’t bring him coffee in the mornings and he certainly wouldn’t make Gerard smile anymore. Gerard hadn’t been stupid, he had known that all of his hopes and dreams were unlikely but that was the thing, they were hopes and they were his dreams. He had to have something to wish for but now he had nothing. 

Gerard just hung his head and let out a sob, he had ruined everything, and it wasn’t even noon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :(


	11. Chapter 11

It was Monday night and Gerard was standing on the street corner with his head hung. Mikey hadn’t talked to him since he had come home Saturday morning and Frank had never showed up at six for their date. Gerard wasn’t doing very well and it showed in his lack of interest for the customers. 

Gerard had enough money to pay his bills and didn’t have to be out working but he didn’t know if he could stay home for another minute. Mikey remained in his bedroom no matter how hard Gerard tried to get him to come out. He had probably apologized over a hundred times and had even spent the last night sleeping on the floor by Mikey’s door. 

Gerard didn’t have anyone and without his little brother he was getting shaky. There was no one to talk to, no one to care for, and no one to lay with him when he felt lonely. 

When he had realized it was about five he had dressed himself up and done his makeup and waited on the couch, looking out the window to see if Frank’s car would pull up. Somewhere deep inside he had figured that it wouldn’t but he had held onto the small hope that maybe Frank would show. 

Gerard just scuffed his foot softly off the ground and looked up to the sky. The pollution and lights from the city were drowning out all the stars above and he just wanted to see them so badly. He was trying to think about what he could do to make Mikey want to talk to him again. He couldn’t go another day, being ignored by his little brother, he loved him so much but he still felt the guilt of his actions and knew this was a just punishment. 

“Here,” Gerard turned to see the male prostitute who had given him a tampon a few weeks back holding out a little plastic bundle of items. Gerard looked at it and then to the man, confused. “It’s from Frank. He said to make sure you got some,” the man explained and nudged Gerard to take the package. 

“Frank...Frank was here?” Gerard asked and looked to the other dolled up male. Gerard instantly looked away, scanning the streets for Frank but he couldn’t spot anyone who looked like him.

“Yeah, just a few minutes ago. He was down the street a little,” the man motioned over to one of the street lights. “He said your names Gerard. I’m Chrystal.” 

“Nice to meet you, Chrystal,” Gerard said with a small smile as he looked to the man before him. “Is that a street name or…?” Gerard wasn’t trying to be rude, he was trying to understand the others preference. 

“Oh, I’m transgender,” Chrystal said and looked to Gerard. “Was born “Chris.”” She hissed the last part and made quotations with her fingers.

“Oh,” Gerard said and smiled a bit. He realized he shouldn’t refer to Chrystal as a man anymore. He looked at the delicate, honey brown skin and the braided hair. He figured that she must be taking hormones at the least, preparing for the change so that she could be the person she was meant to and he was happy for her. 

“So...did Frank...say anything to you...about me?” Gerard asked and knew he wasn’t very smooth about it. 

“Oh,” Chrystal snickered. “You went running after that, huh?” She asked and shook her head.

“What do you mean?” Gerard inquired, wondering if she knew more than he did about Frank. “I thought you said he was a good guy?!” 

“Oh, he is,” Chrystal said and she looked back to Gerard. “But you broke his heart already, didn’t you?” She asked before she giggled a little and shook her head.

Gerard looked down a little but rolled his eyes. “We went on one date! I doubt there was any heartbreaking involved,” he huffed but then he remembered back to sitting on his couch and his eyes watering when it was half past six and there was no way to pretend that Frank was just late. He had stopped himself though, knowing it was ridiculous to cry over someone he hardly knew but it had been more than that. It had been watching any hope he had of getting a good guy disappear. He knew he wasn’t good enough for someone like Frank. 

“Honey, you do realize that that boy has never asked anyone out as long as I’ve been around these streets. That boy has spent everyday out here bring us stuff and has never so much as suggested wanting one of us or anyone for that matter. He’s been single the whole five years I’ve known him. He saw something in you though, apparently,” Chrystal said and shook her head at Gerard, wondering how slow he must be. 

Gerard looked down at the little package of condoms, the sandwich, and the bottle of water that Frank had made for him. “He just...He came on too strong,” Gerard said honestly. “He told me I could talk to him about my problems and was asking if I liked him and stuff after only one date!” 

“You two have been wandering around these streets together for longer than you know, babe. He has been around you for at least a month and as far as I’ve seen he’s never treated you or anyone badly,” Chrystal said and she looked down the street at the other people who were shooting up with their new, clean needles. “And of course he told you that you could talk to him about your problems. He knows what you do for a living. Damn. How blind are you?” Chrystal shook her head and Gerard looked down a little. “Don’t go thinking you’re something special. He told me I could talk to him too, sat with me for over an hour, and guess what? He actually listened.” Gerard still kept his eyes to the ground as he took in her words. 

“That boy wasn’t trying to make you uncomfortable. I think you’ve just been treated like trash for so long that you can’t see something nice when it’s right in front of you,” she said and her voice was a little softer, Gerard looked back up to her. “What did you say when he asked if you liked him?” 

“I told him he was creepy,” Gerard mumbled sadly and looked back to the sandwich in his hand. He felt really horrible now after he took in everything that Chrystal was saying. Frank had just been trying to help him and he had pushed him away. “We were suppose to go out tonight...he didn’t show,” Gerard said miserably and looked up to the taller figure before him. 

“Well if someone told you they thought you were creepy would you show up?” She asked with a slightly amused face but there was also sympathy in it. 

Gerard shook his head before he opened the sandwich and took a bite of it. He was realizing now that he hadn’t eaten in the last few days since he had been so upset over Mikey. He slowly ate the sandwich and thought about how Frank had made it for him, he felt even worse.

“Look at the brightside,” Chrystal said and Gerard looked up to her as he chewed his sandwich. “He still got your dinner,” she joked and Gerard forced a small crooked smile. “Hell, I’m bad with this stuff,” she said and waved her hand. “Just...honey, I don’t think he’s dated a lot and he probably isn’t sure about a lot of it but I do know that he’s a good guy. He wouldn’t hurt you,” she said quietly and Gerard looked down. 

A car slowly pulled up to the corner and she looked back to Gerard. “This one’s yours,” she said and motioned for Gerard to do his little walk up to the car.

“No...I think I might just go home,” Gerard said with a small sigh. “You take it,” he said and motioned to it. He just really wasn’t feeling up for it tonight and knew any performance he gave would be weak. He didn’t even feel like he had the effort to walk up to the car and lean down to smile at the occupant. 

“You sure?” Chrystal asked and scrunched up her face, confused. Gerard nodded and pushed the condoms into his jacket pocket and put the water bottle half way into the other. “Well, you go home and think on it,” she said quietly to Gerard. “Because you upset my Frankie and I might just have to...stomp you,” she scrunched up her face just at the phrase. “Or whatever it is these bitches say these days,” she said with a smile.

Gerard felt a smile on his face as well and he actually giggled a little. “Okay, I will,” he said with a little wave. “Night, Chrystal.” 

“Hey,” she said, calling back his attention. “To answer your question from before, yes, Frank did say something about you,” she curved her lips a little at Gerard, remembering back to Frank’s words.

“What did he say?” Gerard asked, feeling like he might just die if he didn’t find out. He bit his lip and shifted a little, wishing that he had just seen Frank. Though, he knew that probably wouldn’t have worked out too well. Before talking with Chrystal he probably would have hidden if Frank had come by. Which only made him wonder if Frank had known that. 

_”Did he give Chrystal that stuff to bring me because he knew I’d leave but that I needed it? I can be such an asshole,”_ Gerard thought with a frown. 

Chrystal only smiled and shook her head. “Uh-uh-uh,” she giggled and Gerard huffed at her. “You’ll have to ask him yourself,” she said, hoping that Gerard would, so the two of them could work it out. 

“Maybe,” Gerard said with a frown and a shrug. “If I see him,” he said, trying to brush it off. “Well,” he glanced to the still waiting car, “Goodnight, then.” 

“Night,” she said with a singsong voice before she walked up to the car. Gerard smiled a little at her before he walked off towards home.

* * *

Gerard got home and walked straight to his room to so he could strip out of his outfit and change into his comfortable pajama pants and the Batman tshirt that he had had for so long the design was fading off of it. He decided to go into the bathroom to take his makeup off because he knew he’d fall asleep with it on if he didn’t do it right then. He looked at himself in the mirror for a moment. He still had a baby face and many of the guys and women on the street told him that’s why he got so much business. He wished for it to go away but then part of him was nervous that if it did, he wouldn’t make so much money.

Gerard was pulled from his thoughts by a rough sounding cough that came from Mikey’s room. He slowly walked across the hall to his little brother’s door and tried the knob, finding it unlocked. He pushed open the door and when he didn’t see Mikey in his bed he gently eased himself down onto his knees and looked under it. 

Mikey was curled up in his blankets with his face buried in them as he was resting. Gerard slowly moved a bit closer and let his eyes adjust a little better to the dark bedroom. He frowned when he saw the bruising on Mikey’s cheek, almost clearly a hand print mapped out on Mikey’s pale skin. Mikey had always bruised easily, even more so since his cancer but to Gerard it only made him feel worse. 

“I’m so fucking sorry, Mikey,” Gerard whispered to his sleeping brother before he reached under and fixed Mikey’s blankets a little so he was covered better. “I know I hurt you so bad,” he said to Mikey, even though he knew the other wasn’t hearing him. “There’s no excuse for what I’ve done. I can say that I was tired and when you slapped my back it hurt me so much more than it seemed but that doesn’t make it right,” Gerard said with a tiny, sad sigh. 

Gerard glanced to Mikey’s bruised cheek and felt his eyes watering, seeing how bad it really was. “Look at what I did to you,” he whispered and his voice shook as he tried not to let out a sob. “I can never forgive myself,” he whispered and looked down to his hands, nearly wanting to cut off the one that had harmed Mikey’s soft skin. 

Gerard knew he couldn’t linger in Mikey’s room. He didn’t want to wake him up and scare him by being there. He awkwardly leaned under the bed and pressed a tiny kiss to Mikey’s little cap that covered his head. “I love you, Mikes,” Gerard whispered before he got up and slowly left the room, being sure that he was quiet when he closed the door. 

He went into his room and sat on his bed, crossing his legs. It was at this moment that he reached under the bed and pulled out a well loved sketchbook. He opened it to the first page and smiled at the superhero’s he had sketched what seemed like a lifetime ago. He gently wisped his fingers over one and smiled sadly. These drawings had been the start of his portfolio for art school. Now looking at them only seemed to sadden him. He couldn’t remember the last time he had actually drawn anything other than mindless doodles. 

He carefully turned the page and kept glancing over the drawings that he had created. Sometimes he would catch Mikey in his room, looking through the sketchbook and he would ask Gerard when he was going to go to school for his art. Gerard would just take it from him and put it under the bed, telling him to forget it. 

So, after a few more moments of remembering, Gerard did the same. He carefully closed it before he leaned over and tucked it under the bed in it’s usual spot. He grabbed up the covers on his bed before he fixed them so that they covered him and laid back, clicking off the lamp on the side table. 

Gerard rolled over and hugged one of the thick pillows he had before he nuzzled into it. Gerard didn’t normally have someone to be intimate with and without Mikey to distract him, he was starting to feel so lonely. He closed his eyes, imagining that the pillow was a person. He had this perfect little scenario in his head of what it would be like to be laying there with someone who loved him. 

He even found himself mindlessly whispering things back to what the person would say to him if they really did care about him. He grew tired after a while and nuzzled closer to the pillow. “Goodnight,” he whispered to no one before his eyes dipped closed and he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :(
> 
> Gerard needs snuggles...Anyone?
> 
> Also, sorry this is a little late! I suck! But I got to meet Frank Iero and that was great! Who else is seeing him this tour?


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shout out to ["Simii69"](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Simii69/) for sending me a comment to remind me to upload! Here you go!

By Friday afternoon Gerard was just sitting at the table in the kitchen looking at his folded hands. Mikey still wasn’t talking to him or acknowledging him and Frank had avoided him on the street corner again on Wednesday night. He had given Chrystal another bundle for Gerard and had disappeared before Gerard had even known he was there. 

Gerard had been so upset that he had went to the next car and when the man said that he wanted a rough fuck, Gerard had gotten in. Normally he wouldn’t have but he was so upset and felt so horrible with himself that he wanted someone to hurt him. The guy had been more than rough when he gripped Gerard’s hips while Gerard was on all fours in the back of his car. Gerard had ended up with tears running down his face and blood running down his chin after the man had hit him too hard. He now had bruises on his hips, his ass, and his face but he knew that he deserved it. He thought about Mikey’s bruised cheek and every time the man had hit him or bit him or harshly thrusted into him he told himself that this was his punishment for what he did to Mikey. 

Now he just didn’t want to think or feel anything. He just wanted Mikey to talk to him, someone to talk to him, anyone. Gerard slowly stood and wandered down the hallway to his room before he collapsed onto the bed with a groan. His hips ached in the current position he was in but he didn’t move because it was kind of nice. 

He knew he would probably go out tonight. He could go to the rougher corner and make good money. He still had a lot left from last Friday he had spent with those five men but he had been trying not to think about it. He just figured it was better to make extra money than to wait for it to run out. 

Eventually he forced himself up and sat at his vanity, using his cracked mirror to fix up his face. It didn’t take too long before he looked good enough, in his opinion, and he stood going over to the closet to find an outfit. He decided to put on a pair of tight jeans instead of a skirt. He knew it would make things harder to maneuver but that he didn’t care, he didn’t mind if the men would just pull them midway down his thighs to fuck him. He found it was easier to imagine that he was being taken by a boyfriend or a lover who had to have him right then, after a date. 

He pulled on a tight shirt and fluffed his hair a little more in his mirror and sighed out before he walked out into the hall. “M-Mikey?” Gerard asked quietly as he stood outside his little brothers bedroom door. There was no response, like usual. “I...I’m leaving,” Gerard squeaked and held himself back from getting too upset when there wasn’t a response. “I love you,” Gerard tried and there was still silence. “Are...Aren’t you going to tell me to be safe?” Gerard asked since Mikey hadn’t said it to him all week when he had gone out twice, Mikey always said it to him. 

There was still silence and Gerard just frowned but nodded even though Mikey couldn’t see him since the door was closed. “Well...I’ll make you one of your dinners,” Gerard said quietly. “Be sure to eat,” he added before he went down the hall and got into the freezer. He got out one of Mikey’s microwavable meals and cooked it. “It’s ...It’s ready when you are,” Gerard said and stood by the doorway. “I’m...I’m leaving,” Gerard said again and glanced to Mikey’s door, hoping that it would open. “Bye, Mikes,” Gerard said quietly before he closed the door. He sighed out once he was outside and made sure the door was locked tightly.

* * *

“Yeah! Oh Yeah,” Gerard whined as he was being pushed into the rough bricked wall of a building. His ass was pushed out for the man thrusting into him and he bit into his lower lip as the man was roughly gripping at his bruised hips. Just as he had figured his pants were bunched around his thighs and the guy was desperately thrusting into him. 

“Baby, yeah that’s it,” Gerard whined as the guy started thrusting into his spot. He huffed and moaned as the guys thrusts increased at his words. “Give it to me,” Gerard said through his grit teeth and moaned louder when the guys thrusts were harsh against his prostate. 

Gerard kept letting out fussy, yeses with each of the guys thrusts. He couldn’t believe that he was so close to his own crgasm himself. “Yeah, just a little more,” Gerard whined and started pressing back into the man’s thrusts. “Oh, please,” he whined. 

“Yeah, baby, yeah,” the man rasped out and moaned as he continued to slam into Gerard’s hole until he came inside him with loud moans and he heard the whore whining into the brick wall that his face was against. He kept thrusting a little more, hearing the moans intensify, he knew the hooker was getting off from his thrusts. He pulled out when his cock got too sensitive to be inside the tight, pulsing hole. “Damn,” he moaned when Gerard’s hole tightened and his cum dripped down the whore’s leg. He moaned and leaned forward, kissing at the man's neck. 

Gerard hummed and tilted his head back so the man could kiss his neck better. His eyes were still heavy lidded from his orgasm as he glanced down the alley, when he heard voice. He saw another prostitute taking a packet of needles from tattooed fingers and tried to straighten up to get at his pants, wanting to pull them up. But the man behind him still had his chest pressed to Gerard’s back and his softening dick against Gerard’s ass.

“Hey, what’s the rush?” The guy purred to Gerard who was pushing him back. “Fuck,” the guy said when he saw Frank standing at the end of the alley looking to them. He quickly stood up straight and buckled his pants. “Later,” the guy said to Gerard before he walked to the other end of the alley, getting away from Frank.

Gerard kept his eyes down as he got his pants up and buckled them. He knew Frank had seen him and that he would obviously know what had been happening. He looked to the end of the alley and saw that Frank was gone from his spot. 

Gerard shifted a little when he felt the man’s cum caked to the inside of his thighs and smearing on his jeans. He didn’t like it but the man had paid two hundred to finish inside and Gerard knew he deserved to be used like a whore. 

Gerard quickly went to the end of the alley and looked both ways. He caught a glimpse of Frank turning down a different road. “Hey! Hey wait!” Gerard called after Frank and ran in the direction he had seen him go. He turned down the road and saw Frank handing condoms to a young girl who had stopped him. 

“Frank,” Gerard said with a little sigh and Frank turned to look at Gerard. There was an awkward air around them and he wondered how much Frank had really seen of him in the alley. “Hey,” Gerard said the only thing he could think of and he felt stupid for it. “How...How are you?” 

“I’ve…,” Frank paused with a small sigh and shrugged. “I’ve been alright. How about you?” He kept his hand on the strap of his duffle bag and Gerard noted how it was in front of Frank. Normally Frank shifted it to the side to better talk to someone, now he was keeping it between them. 

“I…,” Gerard stopped. He didn’t know what he was supposed to say. “I’ve been miserable,” Gerard admitted with sad eyes and just shook his head. “I…,” Gerard sighed a little. “Is...Is that offer to talk still good?” He hugged himself and looked to Frank sadly. He didn’t know Frank that well, that much was true but maybe that would help him. He needed to talk to someone about Mikey, about his problems, he’d just have to keep things worded right so Frank wouldn’t know that he had a little brother

Frank paused for a moment as he looked to Gerard but when he saw how sad and tired he looked, he knew he couldn’t turn him down. “Yeah,” Frank said with a little smile. He knew Gerard might find him creepy and that he might not want to date him but he could at least help the younger male. 

Gerard looked up to him with a little smile. “Really?” He noticed Frank had pulled his bag to the side and he smiled a tiny bit. When Frank nodded he could only smile more. “Can I buy you a coffee?” 

“Sure,” Frank said with a little smile and nodded down the road so Gerard would follow him. “So what’s going on?” Frank asked genuinely as he looked over to Gerard. 

Gerard sighed out defeatedly, wondering about where he could start. “I...I hurt someone...that I love very much,” Gerard said quietly. “I...I hit them,” he confessed and it felt good but made his eyes teared up all at once. Frank frowned as he saw Gerard’s eyes watering a little. “I just...I got so angry and he had hit me too but,” Gerard saw Frank’s eyes shoot up to his and he quickly continued, “but he didn’t mean to hurt me so bad. He didn’t know I was already sore. He’s a young kid,” Gerard said with a little sigh. 

“Is that what happened to your lip?” Frank asked quietly and motioned to Gerard’s split lip with a small frown.

Gerard shook his head and looked down. “Customer,” he muttered weakly and tried to hide his face. 

“Well,” Frank said quietly as he looked to Gerard, “sometimes we snap. I’m not saying that that should make it okay but it does happen.” 

“And with you,” Gerard said quietly, “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have snapped at you like I did. I guess...I don’t know. I don’t take guys sincerely,” he said sadly. “So when people say things I just get bothered,” he said with a sigh. “I wish I was better at words,” he confessed with a little smile. 

Frank smiled a little bit at Gerard and nodded. “Gerard, I know that I probably freaked you out a little and that’s my fault,” he said honestly with a shrug. “I have never really dated and I just figured...if you didn’t like me I didn’t want to keep bothering you by asking you out,” Frank confessed and looked to Gerard with a crooked smile. 

“I...I do like you,” Gerard admitted quietly and he glanced up to Frank with a small, bashful smile. Panic filled him though as he thought that Frank might not like _him_ anymore. He looked down and frowned a little, hoping his thoughts weren’t true. 

Frank smiled a bit and when Gerard’s hand bumped his since they were close together, he gently slipped his hand into Gerard’s and held it. He smiled a little more than he should have when he saw Gerard smile wide and blush terribly before he looked down trying to hide it. “I like you too,” Frank said back with a smile. 

Gerard was trying to calm the blush that was spreading over his entire face, he hadn’t heard that for a long time. If he did hear it now, he usually didn't have pants on. “So...would you go out with me again?” Gerard asked and bit his bottom lip with a shy smile. 

“I think I could do that,” Frank said with a smile and held open the door to the coffee shop for Gerard. Gerard smiled and walked by him and into the warm shop. Gerard took a better look at the shop this time. It wasn’t a great place but it looked clean and decent. 

“How do you like your coffee?” Gerard asked as he walked up to the register. “Are you hungry?”

“Two creams and two sugars,” Frank said with a little smile. “And I’m alright,” Frank said with a small smile, not wanting to take anymore money from Gerard than what he was paying for the coffee. 

“But if I get you something to eat, it would be considered a second date,” Gerard said with a smile and giggled a little. 

Frank smiled at Gerard and nodded. “This is true,” he said and then hummed like he was thinking. “You know, I bet I could go for a chocolate chip muffin,” Frank said with a smile. 

“Okay,” Gerard said with a smile and ordered Frank’s items before ordering his. They got their coffees and muffins in only a few minutes and were soon sitting in a booth. Gerard peeled off his jacket and sat it beside him before he leaned forward on the table and began to pick at his muffin. “So, I’m really glad that you let me apologize,” Gerard said with a bit of a smile. 

“I’m glad that you did,” Frank said with a smile that matched Gerard’s. He ran his eyes over Gerard for a moment and tried not to think about what he had heard and seen in the alleyway, he just looked down to his coffee. He knew if he thought about it too much his thought could go in two directions, sadness or excited, neither would be great for their date. 

“I do feel really bad about it and I owe you so many thank you’s,” Gerard said and shook his head a little, his hair swaying. “That night that you found me around here I really needed someone. I didn’t thank you enough and I really should have,” Gerard confessed with a crooked smile. 

“Don’t worry about it and you did thank me when you woke up,” Frank said and waved his hand like it didn’t matter. “You’d do the same for me.”

Gerard shook his head a little but realized that he actually would. Though, he hoped he would never find Frank on the streets unconscious, he didn’t want that to ever happen. “I would do it but I don’t ever want that to happen,” Gerard confessed and picked another piece of his muffin off. 

“Okay,” Frank said with a bit of a smile. “So I don’t want it happening to you again.” Frank sipped his coffee and bit into the top of his muffin. 

Gerard looked like he was about to spit out his coffee and Frank looked to him with a questioning stare. “You just bit into your muffin like a damn barbarian!” Gerard laughed and smiled. “That’s not how it’s done!” 

“You pick yours apart like a schoolgirl!” Frank smiled back and laughed at Gerard’s outburst. 

“No! Muffins are meant to be picked apart and cherished not bit into like an apple!” Gerard said with a giggle as he picked off another piece of his muffin. 

“Oh my God!” Frank said sitting straight up like he had realized something of huge importance. “You’re one of those people who cut your apples into slices,” Frank said and pointed at Gerard like he was accusing him of a crime but was still smiling wide. 

“Don’t judge me!” Gerard fell into a fit of laughter and hid his face with his hands. He laughed more when he looked across from him and saw Frank laughing so hard that his eyes were nearly closed and they were watering. 

“I have to confess something the could ruin any chances we have at a relationship,” Gerard said, forcing himself to act completely serious but then swayed and giggled a little. 

“Oh, God,” Frank gasped dramatically. 

“I also pull apart sandwiches and burgers if they’re thin enough,” he laughed as Frank looked horrified. They both laughed again and that’s when it hit Gerard, he was laughing, he was having fun. He couldn’t remember the last time he had laughed so hard. He had been miserable for over a week and now he was feeling better because of Frank, he was really happy that he had apologized. 

“Well, there are two types of people,” Frank said and motioned to himself. “People who eat things the way they should be eaten and then people who pick things apart like birds or rats….or other creatures of the night,” Frank said and laughed. 

“So I’m a creature of the night?” Gerard asked and quirked an eyebrow, trying to tease Frank by looking seductive. 

Frank had almost bit through his tongue when he had mentioned it, afraid Gerard would take it offensively. He was happy to see that Gerard was taking it like it was intended, as an innocent joke. 

“Well, they say they’re all good looking so…,” Frank smiled at Gerard. 

“So you think I’m good looking?” Gerard questioned and smirked, glancing up to Frank. 

“Definitely,” Frank said with a smirk back to Gerard. 

“I think it’s safe to say that I think you’re pretty good looking yourself,” Gerard stated boldly but then instantly blushed and looked down to his muffin with a small giggle. 

“Aw,” the girl behind the register whispered to the other and nodded towards Gerard and Frank’s booth. “These two have been giggling for over twenty minutes,” she said when the girl had looked at her confused. 

“Oh, that’s Frank!” The other girls said with recognition as she ran her fingers through her brown hair. The two had known Frank for over a year now. He usually came in once a week, they had never seen him with anyone. “Oh,” she cooed softly as Frank was smiling at Gerard sweetly. “Our little, Frank,” she smiled to the other girl. 

“Oh, look,” the girl named Melanie whispered to the brunette. They both hid a little as Frank was leaning closer to Gerard. 

“Oh, just kiss him,” Erica whispered against Melanie’s hair but was talking to no one in particular other than Frank who couldn’t hear her. 

Gerard had looked down bashfully and was now looking up through his long eyelashes after Frank had complimented him on his beautiful, brown eyes. His cheeks a little pink. 

“Oh, what a flirt,” Melanie giggled with a smile. “He’s so cute,” she whispered to Erica who nodded. “I almost want to say he’s out of Frank’s league,” she confessed and they both broke into a fit of giggles. 

“Though, Frank’s a sweetie. I’d date him,” Erica whispered as they moved a little to see the seated couple better. 

“Oh, God. Have you heard him giggle? He’s adorable,” Melanie added as she saw Frank smile at Gerard. 

They both bit their lips as Frank was leaning in a little and Gerard was looking down to Frank’s lip and seemed nervous but his eyes flickered shut. Both girls felt excitement building in their chests as they grabbed each other's hands and shook them a little, trying not to squeak. It was then that Erica bumped a coffee mug that had been sitting on the counters edge and it smashed when it fell to the floor. They both looked to the mug, still holding their hands in a tight embrace from their excitement before they quickly looked up to see Gerard and Frank looking to them.

“Shit,” Erica squeaked as her and Melanie hid behind the bar and broke into a fit of giggles.

“Alright, girls,” Frank laughed and shook his head. “Come out.”

They both awkwardly waved as they rose from behind the bar with deep red faces. “Frank? Who’s your friend?” Melanie asked with a giggle. 

“His name’s Gerard. Gerard this is Melanie and Erica,” Frank said with an amused smile and motioned to them both when he said their names.

“It’s nice to meet you both,” Gerard said with a little wave and smiled. He was trying to calm himself, he had been so closed to kissing Frank that his heart had nearly been in his throat. 

“So are you both dating?” Erica chimed in with a huge smile. 

Frank shook his head with a smile. “Trying to,” he said, motioning between himself and Gerard. 

“Aw!” They both dragged out the word in unison and had grabbed the other’s hand again. “That’s so cute,” they giggled. 

Frank smiled and shook his head. “You two are ridiculous,” Frank laughed before he finished his muffin. He got up and grabbed his plate and Gerard’s that was now empty, bringing them to the girls so they wouldn’t have to get them. “Here,” he said and handed them to Erica. “I’m going to take my _date_ home now,” Frank said dramatically and the girls giggled along with Gerard. 

Gerard stood and Frank held the door for him. “Bye girls,” Gerard purred and waved effeminately to them with a wink before he walked out and Frank followed after saying his own goodbye. 

He looked to Gerard with a blush and shook his head. “I’ve known them for a year or so, they’re like my baby sisters,” Frank said with a little laugh. 

“They tease you like family,” Gerard laughed. “My br-,” Gerard instantly bit his tongue and panic lept into him as he realized he almost mentioned Mikey. “They’re sweet,” he said with a smile, shaking his head like he had just messed up what he was saying. 

“They’re good girls,” Frank said with a smile and Gerard smiled back when Frank’s hand slipped into his again. “So, I know this is only our second date but...I really had fun,” Frank confessed and smiled a bit as he was walking Gerard home. 

“I did too,” Gerard blushed and looked down but smiled back at Frank and swayed his hand with Frank’s a little. He was realizing now that he really was having fun with Frank and they hadn’t done anything other than drink coffee and eat a muffin. He didn’t know that could be fun but he was starting to think that maybe it was just Frank. 

“So, would it be safe to say that I can ask you on a third date?” Frank asked as he was walking down Gerard’s road with him. 

Gerard smiled and gently bit his bottom lip and nodded. “I’d love to,” Gerard said, trying not to look too excited even though he really was. 

“Good,” Frank was happy that Gerard had given him another chance. He told himself that he would have to try and go slower with Gerard so he wouldn’t scare him away again but as he neared Gerard’s door with him he wondered if he should kiss him or not.

“I...I had a nice time,” Gerard said with a little smile and he turned to face Frank, pausing at his door. He was hoping Frank would kiss him, was lingering for him to do so. 

“I did too,” Frank said with a small smile. “I-I’m not sure about a lot of this,” Frank admitted shyly. “I don’t...I don’t want to push you too fast or upset you,” Frank said and looked at Gerard bashfully. 

“Well,” Gerard started and stepped closer to Frank, “I’ll tell you if it happens and you can tell me too.” 

“O-Okay,” Frank said quietly as he was too close to Gerard to concentrate on his words. He looked to Gerard’s lips before he leaned in a pressed his mouth gently to Gerard’s for the first time. 

“Mm,” Gerard quietly hummed against Frank’s lips and his eyes fluttered closed. He felt one of Frank’s hands snake around his hip and rest on his lower back and Gerard gently rested his hands on either side of Frank’s head. Gerard backed up a little bit and pulled Frank with him until he was back up against his door, he ran a hand through Frank’s hair and the other down Frank’s chest as he pressed his mouth a bit harder against Frank’s because suddenly, Gerard felt like he couldn’t get enough of it. 

“Too fast,” Frank breathed when he pulled his mouth from Gerard’s with a little gasp. He looked to Gerard’s red lips and deep hazel eyes and he just wanted to kiss him again and take back his last statement. He felt Gerard’s hand run over his chest a little more and the feeling made him breath out a little uneasily.

“I’m sorry,” Gerard squeaked out with a little breath and looked down shyly. 

“No, you’re alright,” Frank said with a smile. “I just might have had to bring you inside if that continued,” Frank said with a little giggle. 

“Oh!” Gerard said in realization and his eyes widened but then he giggled and blushed. 

“So, Monday, there’s a movie playing at the drive-in. It’s the last movie before they close for the winter. Batman, I think,” Frank said nervously and Gerard thought it was adorable. He liked that Frank was still bashful when asking him about a date like it was there first one. “It’s suppose to be a little warmer this week and the snow has melted and I...Well.. Did...I mean would you...wanna go?” 

“I’d love to,” Gerard said with a smile at Frank. “See you Monday,” Gerard grinned and leaned forward, pressing a tiny kiss to Frank’s lips. “Goodnight,” he said with a smile. 

“Night, Gerard,” Frank whispered with a smile as he slowly walked down Gerard’s pathway but was still watching Gerard go in by walking backwards. 

Gerard looked over his shoulder and saw Frank watching him and giggled. He saw Frank blush and then turn around to walk straight but glance back over his shoulder. Gerard smiled before he went inside and closed the door and locked it. He smiled wide as he rested back against the door with a content sigh. 

“G-Gee?” Gerard lifted his head from where it had been resting back against the door to see Mikey standing at the end of the hall. Mikey was shaking terribly and had tears running down his face. Gerard’s heart jumped as Mikey’s hands came out, reaching for him and were shaking so badly.

“Hey, hey, hey,” Gerard whispered and quickly went to Mikey kneeling in front of him. He brushed back the short, stray hairs that were sticking to Mikey’s sweaty forehead. “What’s wrong?” Gerard asked him and he feared that Mikey had been sick for days without telling him.

“I-I had a dream,” Mikey began and quickly jumped into Gerard’s arms, burying his face into him and hugging him tightly. “You...You died and I hadn’t talked to you or told you to be safe and…,” Mikey breathed in shakily. “Gerard, I’m sorry,” he cried and nuzzled closer to Gerard. 

“No, baby,” Gerard fussed with his eyes watering, sad that Mikey was so upset and scared. “It’s my fault,” he whispered sadly. “I am so sorry that I hurt you,” Gerard cried and pulled Mikey back a little to look at him, he held his little face in his hands.”I love you so much,” he said and kissed Mikey’s face all over. “I’m so sorry, baby. I’m so sorry,” Gerard whispered and kept kissing Mikey’s cheek with it’s faded bruise. 

Mikey felt Gerard’s kisses on his cheek and just heard his older brother keep saying that he was sorry. “It’s okay, Gee,” Mikey squeaked, just so happy that his brother was okay and that he was home. “I’m sorry too,” he whimpered. “I should have talked to you,” Mikey confessed. “I’ve missed talking to you and sleeping with you,” Mikey said before he wrapped his arms around Gerard’s neck. 

Gerard wrapped his arms around Mikey and pulled him up, holding him closely. He nuzzled Mikey so close and brought him into his room and laid him down in his bed. “Let me shower really quick and then I’ll come right back,” Gerard whispered. He would have just stayed with him but he had been with a customer. 

He quickly went into the bathroom and stripped himself down before he got in and scrubbed himself clean. He was happy that Mikey was talking to him again. It only took him about five minutes to get cleaned up before he went into his room and pulled on sleeping pants. 

“Back already,” he said with a small smile and pulled Mikey close to him. He was happy to see that Mikey wasn’t crying anymore. 

“Did...Did you have to work?” Mikey asked quietly as he nuzzled closely into Gerard and rested his eyes. 

“I did but...I ran into Frank and we went out on a date,” Gerard said with a little smile as he remembered it. “We’re going out on Monday,” Gerard smiled. “We’re going to see Batman at the movies.”

“Oh! Can I come?” Mikey asked excitedly. He loved movies and especially Batman, he really hoped he could go. 

“Well, not this time,” Gerard said quietly. “When you meet Frank I’m sure he’ll like you,” Gerard hoped what he was saying was true. “Then you can come out with us.”

“Well, do you like him?” Mikey asked with a little smile. He knew his brother went on lots of dates but Gerard never smiled like he had when he mentioned Frank and him going on a date. 

“I...I really do,” Gerard whispered with a big grin on his face. 

Mikey smiled and nuzzled into Gerard, happy that his brother was happy. “I love you, Gee.”

“I love you too, Mikes and I really am sorry,” Gerard whispered and kissed his brother’s cheek on more time. 

“I know you are, Gee. Now stop kissing me!” He squeaked and then giggled when Gerard playfully tackled him with kisses. “Save them for Frank!”

“Oh, fine,” Gerard said with a smile but pulled Mikey closer. 

“Night, Gee,” Mikey giggled a little and nuzzled closer. 

Gerard smiled as he held Mikey closely. He figured tonight was a really great night for him. Mikey was finally talking to him, had forgiven him, and Frank had forgiven him as well. He knew things were finally looking up for him. He hummed contently and nuzzled Mikey closer, soon enough he hoped that he might be able to get Frank to accept Mikey. At the very least get close enough to him to guilt trip him into staying and helping with him. He frowned a little when he thought about it but he knew that no matter how much he liked Frank, that Mikey had to come first. He kissed Mikey’s forehead and nuzzled his nose into his soft hair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I added this from my phone since I cannot get to my computer! 
> 
> Sorry if there is any errors and that this is late!


	13. Chapter 13

Gerard didn’t leave the house for the whole weekend, he spent it with Mikey. They stayed curled up on the couch and watched anything Mikey wanted. Gerard was happy to have things back to normal. It had been hell not talking to Mikey for a week so he was happy to see his little brother smile and giggle with him again. 

“Gerard?” Mikey asked as he got up from Gerard’s arms and began jumping on the couch at Gerard’s feet. 

“Yes,” Gerard said and glanced to Mikey, amused at his bouncing. He knew he should probably tell him to get down and not to do that but when Mikey was happy, Gerard was happy. 

“Are you going out with Frank tonight?” Mikey asked in a playful, teasing tone. Gerard nodded and draped a hand over his mouth to hide his smile. “Are you going to get dressed up all pretty?” Mikey giggled. 

“Oh, hush,” Gerard said with a little smile and playfully nudged Mikey with his sock covered foot. “But yes,” Gerard smiled playfully, “I will look very pretty when Frank comes.” 

Mikey giggled and jumped down on top of Gerard who groaned a little from Mikey knocking the wind out of him. “Will you tell me about the movie when you get home?” 

“Of course I will,” Gerard said with a smile. 

“Just make sure you don’t get distracted kissing, Frank,” Mikey teased more and giggled at Gerard’s shocked face. “You know you’re going to kiss him,” Mikey giggled.

“Oh, you think so!?” Gerard grabbed Mikey and started tickling him. “What if I kiss you?!” Gerard giggled and playfully kissed Mikey’s cheeks as he tickled him.

“Ew, no!” Mikey shrieked and squirmed away before he ran into the kitchen. “What’s for dinner? Can I have pizza?” Mikey asked as he looked to the fridge, opening it. 

“Maybe tomorrow night,” Gerard said as he laid on his side, looking to Mikey. “I have to get ready soon or I’d go get it tonight,” he told him honestly. 

“Frank could stop at a pizza place on the way home,” Mikey suggested with a smile. 

“Uh, who am I buying the pizza for if we’ve already eaten?” Gerard asked and raised an eyebrow. 

“Just tell him you’re hungry again,” Mikey said and giggled. 

“Tomorrow,” Gerard said with a smile before he got up and walked to his bedroom. Gerard groaned as he stretched in front of his vanity before he sat down. He started applying his makeup, knowing he wouldn’t need a lot with Frank being his date. Frank seemed to like him, even after he had seen him without makeup. 

“So,” Mikey said as he ran in and jumped onto the bed. “I get to go to bed at ten, right?” Mikey said with a smirk knowing what would happen. 

“Nine,” Gerard stated as he rubbed a little lip gloss onto his lips with his finger. He got up and slipped out of his sleeping pants before he grabbed up a nice pair of jeans he had set out for the night.

“Ten,” Mikey chirped and smiled as Gerard looked up to him seeming like he was going to tell him no but when Mikey pouted he saw Gerard’s resolve dissipating. 

“Ten it is,” Gerard said with a sigh but with a small smile still on his lips. He pulled on a nice shirt that was plain black and long sleeved. He turned to the side and looked at himself in the mirror before he ran his hands over the curve of his backside.

Mikey playfully wolf whistled at Gerard and laughed loudly when his older brother turned around and looked at him with large, shocked eyes. “You’re face,” Mikey wheezed out through his laughs. 

“You little punk,” Gerard laughed and playfully hit Mikey with a pillow. “You don’t need to be whistling at anyone for quite a long time,” he scolded playfully. 

“You don’t count,” Mikey teased and laid back on the bed and yawned a little. 

Gerard was fluffing his hair when there was a knock at the door. “Oh! He must be here.” Gerard said suddenly and Mikey sat back up. “He’s a little early,” Gerard said, rushing around to grab his boots and put them on. “I’m coming!” 

“I’ll see you tonight,” Mikey said with a smile. “Have fun.” 

“You be good,” Gerard said as he grabbed up his phone and put it in his pocket. “Call me if you need me,” Gerard rattled off as he picked up his jacket. 

“Be safe,” Mikey said and saw Gerard stop in the doorway and turned to him.

“I will. Always,” Gerard said with a soft, endearing smile at his little brother. “I love you,” he said quietly to his little brother.

“I love you too,” Mikey said with a smile and then waved. He watched Gerard leave and heard him open the door. He heard Gerard say his greeting and another voice respond and then the door closed. This was his cue, telling him they were gone and that he could come out. 

Mikey slowly walked down the hall and wondered what he would have for dinner. He figured he could warm up a can of spaghetti o’s.

“Oh, who’s this?” Mikey froze in his spot at the end of the hall and looked up with wide eyes as he saw, who he could only assume was Frank, standing in front of him. 

Mikey glanced to Gerard who was standing in the kitchen with flowers in his hand, and one of their mother’s vases in his other hand. He looked to Mikey and his face made Mikey so upset with himself, Gerard just looked so sad and disappointed with him. 

“He’s...He’s my brother,” Gerard said quietly and he looked to Frank, waiting for him to suddenly remember something else he had to do. 

“Aw,” Frank said with a smile. “Hey, little man, I’m Frank,” he said and held his hand out to Mikey. 

“Mikey,” he squeaked quietly and took Frank’s hand shaking it. 

“Well, Mikey,” Frank said with a smile and was still leaning down to his level. “I was going to take Gerard out to see Batman tonight, would you maybe...hmm I don’t know, want to come?” Frank asked with a smile. 

“Can I?!” Mikey asked Gerard and couldn’t contain the excitement inside him. 

“Yeah,” Gerard said with a small smile but then he glanced to Frank, unsure of how this was going to end. 

“I’ll go get my beenie,” Mikey hollered before he ran down the hall excitedly and into his room. He grabbed up his hat and his jacket, pulling it on. 

“I’m...I’m sorry,” Gerard whispered to Frank now that Mikey was out of the room. He felt his eyes stinging, knowing he might cry but he held it in. 

“Hey, it’s fine,” Frank said with a smile at Gerard but he was a little taken aback and Gerard could sense it. Then again Gerard couldn’t tell if he was taken aback actually by Mikey or because Gerard hadn’t told him that he had a little brother. 

“I’m ready!” Mikey hollered and Frank opened the door for him, smiling as he ran by. 

Frank stepped out as Gerard closed and locked the door behind him. He turned to see that Frank had the top down on his mustang and watched in horror as Mikey crawled over the side instead of opening the door. He looked to the scuff on the side of Frank’s black door from Mikey’s foot. 

“If it gets too windy and cool just tell me,” Frank said as he held open Gerard’s door for him. “I had it down since it’s nice today. I figured it’d be my last chance til next spring,” he said with a smile. 

Gerard forced a smile and nodded as he buckled himself. “Mikey, buckle up,” he said to his little brother who was jumping around Frank’s backseat. Gerard felt humiliated and worried that Frank would get mad. “I’m sorry,” he whispered to Frank with a sad face, seeming to know that this was going to be his last time with Frank. 

“Don’t worry about it,” Frank said with a genuine smile and he reached over, gently grabbing Gerard’s hand for a moment before he started the car. 

“This car is so cool!” Mikey said with a big giggle and he reached forward to grab something to help himself sit forward and be closer to them. He managing to grab Frank’s seat belt from where it connected to the door and choke him a little. 

“Mikey, don’t!” Gerard said and took Mikey’s hand from the seat belt. “I’m sorry!” Gerard fussed again and looked to Frank with sad, worried eyes. 

“He’s fine,” Frank said with a reassuring smile and adjusted the belt from riding into his neck. 

Mikey held his hands up and giggled as the wind was blowing them around. Gerard looked down and just put his hand over his eyes with a little sigh, he just hoped Mikey would calm down when they got to the movies.

* * *

Gerard was sitting in the back, right seat of Frank’s car as he watched the movie. He had his head leaning on his fist, his elbow resting on the edge of Frank’s car. Mikey had sat between him and Frank the second they had gotten into the back. Gerard was mortified. Mikey had dragged Frank to the concession stand and had ordered so much food. Gerard had offered to pay for it but Frank had paid without a complaint, Gerard knew he was probably just being nice. 

Mikey jumped up excitedly at an explosion and dumped his large coke, the popcorn, and nachos all over the floor of Frank’s car. “Mikey!” Gerard hollered and quickly grabbed the coke but the top had already popped off and spilt everywhere. 

“I-I’m sorry, Gee,” Mikey squeaked and then looked to Frank. “I’m sorry,” he whispered and looked down. 

“Hey-Hey,” Frank said quietly. “Don’t worry about it, buddy. It’ll wash out. I’ll go get you some more coke,” Frank said with a smile.

“And nacho’s?” Mikey asked shyly and Gerard just wanted to die as he saw the nacho cheese and chips being crushed into Frank’s nice, black rug as Mikey asked for more.

“And nacho’s,” Frank said with a smile. “You need anything?” Frank asked Gerard who shook his head but said his thanks. Frank smiled and nodded before he stood and jumped over the edge of the car. 

Gerard waited until Frank had walked off. “Mikey, please?” Gerard begged. “I really like him,” he fussed and ran his fingers through his hair. “I don’t want to lose him before I have a chance to really get to know him,” he squeaked and just glanced over to where Frank was standing in line. Frank looked at him and smiled a bit when he saw that Gerard was looking to him. 

“I know,” Mikey said and looked down, frowning. “I’m sorry, I’ll try to be better,” he said quietly. Gerard went to speak again a moment later but he saw Frank coming so he just looked back to the screen. 

“Here we go,” Frank said with a smile and handed Mikey his coke and new nacho’s. 

“Thank you, Frank,” Mikey said with a smile and went back to eating nacho’s. He offered one to Gerard who gave him a tiny smile and took it. 

Frank carefully put his arm over the back of the seats and gently tickled the back of Gerard’s neck so he’d look at him. He smiled at Gerard when he did and kept gently running his fingers back and forth over the back of Gerard’s neck, pleased with how soft the skin was. 

Gerard smiled and closed his eyes, feeling content with Frank’s gentle touch, this made him feel like things were okay. He wanted to lean over and kiss Frank but Mikey was between them and he really didn’t want to kiss too intimately in front of Mikey. Though, before Mikey had come with them, he had planned on straddling Frank and kissing him to no end in the back of this car. 

Mikey shifted to rest his head back and bumped Frank’s arms. “Can you move your arm, please?” Mikey asked sheepishly since he wasn’t aware of Frank’s tender touches on Gerard’s neck. 

“Yeah,” Frank said with a small smile and took his hand from where it had been resting on Gerard’s neck. He leaned over, resting against the door as he looked to the movie screen. 

Gerard just frowned and wanted to kick something as his neck now felt cold without Frank’s hand resting on it. He found himself pouting and sulking in ten minutes as he just stared at the screen.

* * *

Gerard got in the passenger seat when the movie was over and just sighed before he looked down. Frank got into the driver's seat and looked to Gerard with a bit of a smile. Frank’s hand snuck over into the passenger seat and he laced his fingers with Gerard’s. 

Gerard really appreciated Frank’s multiple attempts to show him any amount of affection or adoration. Frank smiled bigger as Gerard was smiling again and leaned over to give him a little peck on the lips. 

“Ew!” Mikey said with a giggle but it had been loud enough to jump Gerard back and when he looked back Frank had already pulled away. 

Gerard frowned and rested his elbow on the window and his chin in his hand. He just covered his eyes and sighed out weakly. 

“Oh! Can we get pizza?!” Mikey asked from the back and Gerard just wanted to curl up and die for what felt like the hundredth time that night. . 

“Sure we can,” Frank said with a small smile and he found a place nearby before he pulled into it. 

“We go here all the time,” Mikey chirped excitedly. 

When they got parked Mikey quickly unbuckled and jumped over the side of Frank’s car again. “Michael! Use the door!” Gerard nearly shrieked as he was having enough of Mikey’s actions. 

“It’s fine,” Frank said with a small smile to Gerard to calm him since he was clearly upset. 

“No, it’s not! Don’t tell him that this is okay!” Gerard said angrily and Frank backed off at that. 

“I’m sorry, Gerard,” Mikey said quietly and looked down again. 

“It’s...It’s fine,” Gerard said with a sigh.

“Hey, buddy,” Frank said with a little smile. “Would you go pick us out a booth?” He asked. 

“Okay,” Mikey said with a little smile before he went in. 

Frank turned to Gerard and put his hands in his pockets. “What’s the matter, Gerard?” 

_”I don’t want you to leave me because I have a little brother. I know we’re not even really together yet but I really like you. Please, I swear he’s not that bad. You could learn to love him like I do, I swear. Just stick around and see it,”_ was what Gerard wanted to say but he couldn’t make himself say the words. He knew if he did than Frank would probably find _him_ creepy. 

“I’m just...I’m tired,” Gerard said and looked down with a frown.

“I’m sorry,” Frank said with a small frown. “I can take you home if you want? I understand,” Frank suggested, knowing that if Gerard was really tired that he might just want to go home and get some rest. 

Gerard quickly looked to Frank and he wondered if he wanted to just get rid of him and Mikey. “Do...Do you want to take me home?” Gerard asked shyly and looked down again. 

“No but if you’re tired, I can,” he said with a small smile. 

“I’m not that tired,” Gerard said, trying to see if Frank would press the topic of him taking Gerard home. 

“Alright,” Frank said with a little smile. “Come on. Let’s get pizza,” Frank said with a smile and took Gerard’s hand in his. 

Gerard smiled a bit and gripped Frank’s hand in his before they went in and sat at the booth with Mikey. 

“I ordered a large pepperoni pizza with extra cheese and cheese sticks!” Mikey said and giggled. He could get used to Frank, he paid for everything he ever wanted, it was nice. 

“I’m sorry,” Gerard whispered in Frank’s ear and rested his chin on Frank’s shoulder for a moment. “I’ll pay for it. Don’t worry about it,” he said to Frank before he pulled away a little. 

“I’ve got it. I swear, it’s fine,” Frank whispered and kissed Gerard’s cheek softly. Gerard felt Frank’s thumb running over the back of his hand. He smiled a bit and gripped Frank’s hand a little tighter for a few moments. 

They got their drinks and their food came soon after. Mikey instantly dug in and had a face full of sauce in under five minutes and Gerard couldn’t help but to give him an endearing smile. He knew he’d been a bit hard on Mikey tonight, he just hoped that he’d calm down a little. 

“Thank you, Frank,” Mikey said to the other male that sat next to his big brother, eating his own slice of pizza. 

“Don’t worry about it, bud. Thanks for coming with us tonight,” Frank said with a smile to Mikey as he let go of Gerard’s hand but then put his arm around him. 

Gerard smiled contently and scooted a little closer to Frank as he ate his own piece of pizza. This was nice, Mikey being here, and Frank was good with him. Gerard couldn't have asked for a better night. 

“I had fun,” Mikey said with a big smile. “Gerard goes out all the time with a bunch of guys and never takes me,” Mikey said with a little frown. 

Gerard’s eyes went wide and he gently kicked Mikey’s foot under the table. “Why’d you kick me?” Mikey asked Gerard with a frown. Gerard put his face in his hand and frowned when he felt Frank’s arm slowly come away from him. 

“It’s...It’s not like that,” Gerard whispered quietly to Frank with a frown. He felt overwhelmed and trapped a little as Frank was seeming closed off now. “I don’t go out on that many dates,” he said with a little smile, trying to force it. 

“But Gerard…,” Mikey had started, his face confused as Gerard was clearly lying but Gerard glared at him and he instantly quieted. 

Frank had remained quiet for the last five minutes and Gerard was getting more and more nervous. They all continued to eat in silence except for Gerard who just looked down and tried not to look too sad. 

“Can I take home the leftover pizza?” Mikey asked with a giggle as they had all finished. 

“Sure you can,” Frank said with a small smile. “I’ll go get you a box.” Frank got up and paid the woman at the register before he asked her for a box. 

“Are you okay, Gerard?” Mikey asked his brother quietly, seeing how sad he looked. Gerard didn’t say a word though and it only made Mikey even more worried.

“Here you go,” Frank said and handed Mikey the box.

Gerard leaned forward and helped Mikey box up the leftovers. He couldn’t believe that Mikey had asked for them but he didn’t want to say another word. He figured that he had said enough already.

* * *

“Thank you, Frank! I had fun,” Mikey said and he went to jump over the side of Frank’s car before he remembered how Gerard had told him not to. He opened the door and giggled before he closed it and asked Gerard for the keys. 

Gerard had given him the keys when Mikey had asked for them and he watched his little brother run up to the door and open it. Gerard slowly trudged up to the door himself before he turned around to face Frank, being surprised that he had even gotten out of the car. 

“Frank, I’m so sorry about everything tonight,” Gerard said quietly, trying to fix the many problems he figured they must have.

“He’s...He’s not good around other people,” Gerard confessed and then frowned, feeling bad, like he was saying that Mikey had problems. Mikey was just behind in certain communication areas. He had spent most of his life in a hospital with his chemo and that had put him behind in some areas. 

“Don’t worry about it,” Frank said quietly but gave Gerard a little smile. 

Gerard looked to Frank with sad eyes. Frank had looked so excited when Gerard had opened the door to see him there before him, holding flowers. Gerard had been surprised, no one had ever brought him flowers. Now, Frank just looked like he didn’t care all that much about what happened. 

“Thank you,” Gerard said quietly. “For everything.” Gerard figured, if this was the last time he was going to see Frank, he might as well thank him for the one really great night they had had, for all the times Frank had helped him, and for everything he had put up with tonight. 

“No need to thank me,” Frank said with a small smile and then he leaned in. 

Gerard’s heart stopped as he realized that Frank was going to kiss him and he knew that he might get a chance to see Frank again. He let his eyes slip shut and he slowly leaned forward. 

“Gerard?! Are you coming inside?!” Mikey called from inside and Gerard eyes had opened to see that Frank had pulled away from him. 

Frank gave Gerard a little smile and a nod. “Goodnight, Gerard,” Frank said before he turned and walked back to his car.

Gerard watched him go and his eyes watered a little. “Fuck,” he breathed before he turned and walked into the house and slammed the door loudly. He slowly trudged down the hall to his room and got off his jacket, throwing it down on the floor by his bed.

“I’m...I’m sorry, Gee,” Mikey squeaked when he saw Gerard was clearly upset. The door to Gerard’s room slammed loudly and Mikey looked down before he fussed and his eyes watered. 

Gerard landed on the bed and reached his hands down to rip off his boots and threw them hard at the corner before he rolled onto his side and hugged his pillow that had slowly become a comfort to him.

He knew that Frank wasn’t going to take him out again. Frank had never given Gerard his number and Frank didn’t have his. Frank would have set another date for them like he always did if he still wanted to see Gerard. 

Gerard knew he’d just have to find someone else. He wanted to forget Frank and it would make him feel better if there was somebody else to help him do it. He just couldn’t stop his eyes for watering as he thought about losing Frank. He knew it was stupid to cry over but he also knew that it was more than just losing Frank. It was realizing that he was never going to get a decent guy. Gerard just sighed and buried his face into his pillow, hoping to fall asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So much sads...


	14. Chapter 14

Mikey hadn’t slept with Gerard in a few nights. He knew his older brother was mad at him, even though he wasn’t completely sure why he was. He figured it had something to do with Frank but Mikey wasn’t sure. He figured it just had to be because Frank had found out about him. He didn’t know what it was but Gerard didn’t like men knowing about him. They apparently just didn’t like him. This sometimes made Mikey feel really bad about himself. He felt like a burden to his brother already but now he worried that he was making Gerard lose people that he really liked. 

Gerard hadn’t come out of his room much. Mikey had only seen him go to the bathroom and get something to drink a few times, though he had gone out one night on a date. He hadn’t eaten and he wasn’t cooking so Mikey had been making himself stuff in the microwave like usual. Mikey just wished that Gerard would talk to him again, it wasn’t that he was _not_ talking to him, he just wasn’t talking to him like normal. He wouldn’t ask how he was or come sit with him and watch television and they weren’t sleeping together anymore. Mikey just felt lonely. 

Mikey realized on the fifth day that he must be coming down with a bad cold because he felt terrible. He had thrown up his breakfast and he felt so cold even though his skin was sweating. His head ached and he felt dizzy when he walked. It got to the point that he just curled up in his bed and closed his eyes. The room didn’t spin so much when he was laying down but he still felt cold even though he was wrapped up in his blankets. 

Mikey really wanted Gerard as he laid in bed and his body ached. His back hurt and his stomach kept throbbing. Usually Gerard would baby him and help him get to sleep so he didn’t have to feel so sick and uncomfortable. He heard Gerard come out of his room and part of him hoped that he had heard him throwing up and was coming to check on him. 

“I’m going out,” Gerard said and Mikey could tell he was by the door. “I...I have an appointment and then I have to go to work,” Gerard spoke awkwardly, like he didn’t even want to be talking to Mikey. 

Mikey just frowned and hugged his stomach. He pressed his face into his pillow to muffle his sniffle before he nodded his face against it. “O-Okay, Gee,” Mikey called, trying to keep his voice from wavering. “Be safe,” he squeaked. 

“I will. Always,” Gerard said blandly before Mikey heard the door open and close. 

Mikey felt his stomach begin to churn and he cautiously sat up before he ran into the bathroom. He reached the toilet just in time for the last of his breakfast to come up and he weakly sunk to his knees. He whined and then he felt warm, dampness in his briefs and looked down, realizing he had soiled himself when he had puked again. 

He whined and carefully pulled down his briefs and sleeping pants and wiggled out of them. He got them into the sink and sat himself down on the toilet in time for more to drain out of him. He realized that he felt like puking again and quickly grabbed the little trash bin beside the toilet to throw up in. 

Mikey was reduced to tears when he was finally able to stand up from the toilet. His stomach muscles ached from throwing up so much and the diarrhea had seemed like it was never going to stop. Mikey had only been sick like this once before but he had been in the hospital with his big brother holding the bucket for him and petting his forehead with a damp rag. He had talked to Mikey to keep him distracted and had taken care of his soiled pants and bedding every time. 

Mikey looked to his ruined briefs and sleeping pants. He didn’t think he could wash them without throwing up but he knew Gerard would notice if he threw them away. He turned on the water and did his best to rinse them out but after a bit he just balled them up and threw them in the hamper they shared in the bathroom. He made sure to bury them in the bottom so Gerard wouldn’t see them. 

It then came time for him to rinse out the trashcan that had his puke in it. He didn’t enjoy that task any more than washing out his briefs and pajama bottoms but it proved easier. He threw up again once he had finished and had nearly messed himself once more before he got back onto the toilet. He just whined and hid his face, he was trying to get in the shower to get clean but was too afraid of throwing up or messing himself when he was in there. He just wanted Gerard to come home.

* * *

“Alright, Gerard. Just hold still,” Doctor Matthews told him and his face scrunched up in discomfort as he felt the doctor gently pressing the swab into the tip of his penis. He looked around the dingy room he was in. He went to the free clinic for all of his testing and he figured he was due for his std screening.  
He tried to get it done once every three months or so but sometimes he would let it wait a little longer, like this time. He hated getting it done but knew it was necessary with his job. He breathed out as the discomfort was still present. 

“And we’re done,” the doctor said and placed the long swab into a tube. “So, the testing will take about a week,” the doctor prattled on as Gerard fixed his pants. “But Gerard,” he said and turned his voice in a more serious direction. “I cannot stress condom use with you,” he said firmly.

Gerard looked down a little and felt his face warm. The doctor was aware of his occupation and of his habits. He answered all the questions he was asked honestly, something about the doctor always made him feel like he had to. The doctor had been stressing the point of him using condoms since he didn’t a lot of the time.

“I know it makes you more money if you don’t but it should no longer be an option,” Doctor Matthews said with a serious tone, stoning his deep blue eyes. “Oral, anal, it doesn’t matter,” he said with a sigh, “condoms, Gerard. You don’t know these men and you’ve been lucky that you haven’t caught something yet.” 

Gerard continued to look down but pulled his sleeve down from where they had taken his blood work. He knew what Doctor Matthew’s was saying was true but he just tried to ignore it. He needed the money really bad and if men paid extra to fuck him raw, he let them. Plus, it made it easier to pretend that it was someone Gerard trusted and he didn’t mind messy sex, he liked it. 

“Can I go now?” Gerard asked quietly with his arms crossed over his chest, his face towards the floor. He didn’t want to listen to the doctor guilt him anymore.

Doctor Matthew’s sighed through his nose and nodded his head. “Just be careful, Gerard. If something happens to you...who’s going to take care of your brother?” 

“Call me when you get my test results,” Gerard snapped before he walked out of the room. He didn’t want to listen to it anymore. He made his way out of the clinic and began the route to his corner. 

He didn’t want to admit it to himself but part of him was hoping that he would run into Frank. He was hoping that Frank would just say that he had forgot to set up another date with Gerard and still wanted to go out with him. Gerard knew it was a long shot but he just wanted it to happen so bad. He didn’t want to believe that he had lost his chance. 

Gerard did feel bad about how he’d been treating Mikey though, it wasn’t his little brother’s fault. He knew that but it still felt like it kind of was his doing. Things between him and Frank had been fine until Mikey had shown up and told Frank too much. Gerard had wanted to just duct tape Mikey’s mouth when he had mentioned _all_ of Gerard’s dates and how he went on so many. Gerard just hung his head a little though because it only made him realize how Mikey saw him. 

Mikey saw him as someone who went out all the time with a bunch of different guys for money and fun, that wasn’t him. He didn’t want to date most of those guys and he wished he could bring Mikey with him but he just couldn’t, things were complicated. He loved his little brother, more than anything but sometimes he wished he didn’t have the hardships that came with loving him. That thought alone made Gerard feel terrible about himself and he felt ashamed. He figured he should really spend some time with his little brother when he got home.

He got to his corner and picked himself out a spot, leaning against the wall under a dimming street light. He popped his hips forward and when a car would go by he would seductively swirl them. A few cars passed him by and he sighed before he looked up to the toxic sky above, the stars all hidden by lights and pollution. 

“Hey, you,” Gerard heard and for a second his heart jumped, hoping that it was Frank but when he turned he saw Chrystal. He tried not to let his heart and face drop too much in front of her. 

“Oh, hi,” he said and forced a bigger smile but then looked down. 

“Sorry I’m not someone else?” Chrystal smiled at Gerard a bit and leaned closer to him. She saw the he seemed unresponsive and down. “What’s wrong, baby?” 

“I went out with Frank again,” Gerard sighed out and ignored the empty feeling growing in his chest. “And it was nice and he was a nice and we were…,” Gerard started, thinking back to the night in the dingy little coffee shop.

“Nice,” Chrystal said with a little smile, finishing Gerard’s sentence. She wasn’t teasing him, only looking to him with saddened eyes. She could tell by Gerard’s face that this was not something that was being taken lightly. 

“Then he came to take me out and...he found out I had a little brother,” Gerard breathed out and leaned his head back against the rough bricks that were behind him. “But he didn’t care and that meant so much to me,” Gerard said with a sad smile and looked down. “Then my little brother told Frank about all the people I go out with and was just awful,” Gerard said and ignored his misting eyes. “He didn’t mean to be he just…,” Gerard squirmed in his spot, wanting the words to come. 

“He’s a kid, Gerard,” Chrystal said with a sad smile. “They say things and they act out,” she said fondly. “They’re only babies, they haven’t learned,” she leaned closer to Gerard and nudged his shoulder. “I’m sure Frank will ask you out again. He’s not like that,” Chrystal said with a smile. 

“Nope, he didn’t set up another date and hasn’t shown up. It’s almost been a week,” Gerard said with a sad frown. “Has he been around here?” Gerard looked hopeful now. 

“No,” Chrystal frowned and glanced around. “It’s odd though because he’s not usually gone this long. Maybe something happened,” she said and looked worried.

“Yeah, he doesn’t want to see me anymore,” Gerard purred out sadly and just looked down, feeling defeated. “He’s an asshole.”

“I’m sure you have nothing to do with it,”Chrystal said with a huff. “You are not the sun,” she snipped and looked to him. “Remember that.”

“What the fuck does that even mean!?” Gerard snapped back and glared at her. He was tired and irritated and didn’t want this girl being bitchy to him. 

“You’re stupid,” she sighed and rubbed her eyes but avoided her makeup. “You are not the sun, the world does not revolve around you! Stop trying to make everything Frank does now about you.” 

“I’m not! I’m just saying he stops dating me and then all of a sudden stops showing up where I work! That can’t just be a coincidence!” Gerard said bitterly to her and glared. He was pissed with her to say the least. 

“He wouldn’t do that because _I’m_ here. Frank loves me and has known me a lot longer than you,” she snapped back. “I know him and he’s not an asshole! I’m worried about him because he’s not here and I know it has nothing to do with you!” 

“You don’t know anything! You don’t even know what sex you want to be!” Gerard said, aiming low with his insult. He was upset about what Chrystal was saying. It was like she thought she meant more than Gerard did, that’s how he was taking it. 

“Don’t you dare pull that shit! I am a fucking woman!” The voice wavered and Gerard saw Chrystal point to her chest as her broad shoulders shook and her eyes watered. “I don’t need people like you telling me about my life! It’s mine so you can go fuck yourself!”

Gerard felt her shove him hard but he only frowned and held out his hands. “Chrystal...I...I’m sorry,” he said as she had turned away from him and was wiping at her eyes. “It...It was uncalled for. I am an asshole, you’re right,” he said and felt completely honest when he said it. “You’re beautiful and you’re right, I’m not the sun! I’m like...fucking pluto or something, they can’t even make up their mind on what I am! One minute I’m a planet then a dwarf star and then who the fuck knows!” He tried and desperately waved his hands around. 

He saw Chrystal shake a little more and frowned, feeling horrible but then he saw her smiling. “You’re so crazy,” she said and looked to him before she reached out and wrapped her arms around his neck. “I’m sorry I flipped out on you. I just...I’m worried about Frank and he’s a good guy, he wouldn’t do this to stay away from you. You could break his heart and he would still show up to make sure you were fed and had what you needed.”

Gerard weakly hugged around Chrystal’s middle and felt how warm she was, he nuzzled a little closer to her heat. “I know,” he whispered sadly and looked down. He knew that Frank was a great guy but that only proved that Gerard didn’t deserve him. He knew he wasn’t worth it for Frank.

“So...just wait, he’ll come back and ask you out again,” Chrystal said reassuringly and gave him a crooked smile. 

“Well, I have a date planned for this weekend with this guy I met anyway. We went out once already, he’s actually pretty sweet so…,” Gerard shrugged in a nonchalant way. 

“Well,” Chrystal said and seemed a little sad. “I hope it’s...nice," she chose the word that Gerard used to describe his date with Frank, hoping to sway his opinion. She didn’t want Gerard going out with anyone else, she knew he needed someone like Frank, deserved someone like him. 

Gerard looked up at her because he did think of Frank, just like she had intended. “Me too,” he spoke so quietly that it almost wasn’t heard over the car pulling up. “I have to get this,” he said before he slowly walked towards the car, swaying his hips in his tight jeans. 

“Hey, baby,” Gerard purred to the man and puckered out his lips a little. “Wanna have some fun?”

* * *

Gerard didn’t end up getting home until a little after two in the morning and when he walked through the door he was ready to drop. He sighed and set his keys on the stand by the door before he shrugged out of his jacket and set it on the coat rack. 

With his hands on his hips Gerard looked around the house and was surprised to see how clean it was. He figured Mikey had to of cleaned it for him, now he just wondered how long ago he had done it. He hadn’t came out of his room much the past week and when he did, the last thing he had looked for was the state of the house. 

He hung his head a little before he walked to the bathroom and stripped his filthy clothes. He lifted the clothes in the laundry basket to put his work clothes in the bottom like always when he felt something cold and wet touch his hand. He scrunched up his face before he lifted the clothes in the laundry basket to find the drenched article of clothing. He looked to Mikey’s briefs and sleeping pants and saw the slightly discolored white fabric. 

Gerard instantly forgot about his shower and went to his room. He pulled a shirt on with his boxers and walked into Mikey’s bedroom, quietly pushing open the door. He looked to see his little brother curled up on his bed with the trash can from the bathroom on the floor beside it. He leaned to look into it and frowned when he saw it was full of vomit. He could also smell something foul that could only be described as excrements.

He cautiously walked up to Mikey’s bed and pulled back the blankets. He frowned, seeing that Mikey had messed the bed and was still sleeping. He knew his little brother had probably been so tired that he hadn’t even felt it. 

He wondered how long Mikey had been sick, since he hadn’t seen much of him recently. He felt his brother’s forehead and he was warm but not burning up, he figured he must have some sort of stomach flu. 

Gerard carefully got Mikey’s covers off and balled them up before putting them on the floor. “Alright,” he whispered before he lifted Mikey carefully and tried to ignore the wet pajama bottoms caking to his arm. Mikey stirred a little before he nuzzled into his older brother and yawned.

Gerard brought him into the bathroom and by then he knew Mikey was awake by the way he hung his head and his cheeks were a deep pink. “I’m sorry, Gee,” he squeaked.

“It’s okay, baby. Why didn’t you tell me?” Gerard frowned, it seemed like Mikey never wanted to tell him when he was sick lately. He carefully had Mikey stand before he helped him out of his dirty pajamas and briefs, placing them in the sink. 

“I...You’re mad at me,” Mikey said quietly and still looked to the floor as his brother was cleaning him up. 

Gerard stopped a moment and looked to his little brother. “Mikey, I'm not mad. I just...I was sad but I’m okay now,” Gerard said, trying to convince them both.”And don’t ever think that means that you can’t come to me when you’re sick,” Gerard said quietly and brushed back Mikey’s hair, kneeling so he could look into his eyes. 

“Okay, Gee,” Mikey said quietly but he still felt bad for making his brother sad. 

“Hey, let’s get you in the shower and I’ll go change your sheets, okay?” Gerard said, trying to make his little brother feel better. He gave him a tiny smile, trying to get one back. 

“Okay,” Mikey said with a tiny smile before he hugged himself to his big brother. He was happy that Gerard was home, taking care of him. 

Gerard got the shower going for his brother before he went back into Mikey’s room. He stripped the fitted sheet from the bed and even removed the pillowcases, figuring he should get it all done at once. They didn’t have a washer and dryer so Gerard figured he’d be making an early, weekly trip to the laundromat. 

He got a bucket with some cleaner and tiredly scrubbed at the mattress as he yawned. He was worn out but he wanted to make sure that his little brother was taken care of and he still needed to shower himself. Once the mattress was cleaned Gerard dumped the bucket of water outside. 

“You okay in there?” Gerard asked as he sat himself down on the toilet. He rubbed at his burning eyes and muffled a yawn that had slipped from his mouth.

“I’m alright,” Mikey said quietly. He silently shut off the water and when he pulled back the curtain Gerard was there to wrap him up in a towel. 

“I got you some pajamas. They’re in on my bed. You can sleep with me tonight, if you want?” Gerard tried as he carefully dried Mikey’s hair. He felt like there was a wall between Mikey and himself and it saddened him. He knew he had created that wall and it made him feel worse. For every minute he had avoided Mikey, a brick had been placed to build this hypothetical wall between them. 

“Okay,” Mikey said with a small smile before he padded around his older brother, clutching tightly to his towel. 

“I...I’m going to shower real quick and I’ll be in, okay?” Gerard asked and Mikey just nodded to him before he went into Gerard’s room. 

Gerard frowned and stripped off his outfit slowly before stepping into the shower. Mikey had used up most of the hot water so Gerard didn’t linger long to enjoy the water’s spray, like he did most nights. 

Gerard went into his room and pulled on some briefs and a shirt before he carefully crawled over his bed to Mikey. “Mikey?” Gerard whispered and saw his little brother shift a little. “I love you,” Gerard hummed against his little brother’s ear before he pulled him close.

“I love you too,” Mikey quietly squeaked before he rolled over to face his brother. He wrapped his arms around his neck and nuzzled close. “Night, Gee.”

”Night, Mikes,” Gerard whispered and pulled Mikey closer to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is late, I seem to be doing this a lot lately! So sorry! Life has been crazy and all over the place. 
> 
> Thank you all for being so patient. Enjoy!


	15. Chapter 15

Mikey was laying on his older brothers bed and looking at the ceiling. “So, what’s his name?” Mikey questioned quietly and turned to look at Gerard’s reflection in his cracked mirror as he applied lip gloss.

“Jason,” Gerard said mindlessly as he fluffed his hair and smacked his lips. 

“Are you going to see a movie?” Mikey asked and sat himself up. He felt a bit better, he hadn’t thrown up today and he no longer worried about messing himself. 

“No, he’s taking me to the theater,” Gerard mumbled as he pulled on a jacket. “We’re going to see Sweeney Todd,” he said with a small smile as he sat down to pull on his boots.

“That sounds like fun,” Mikey said but he honestly liked the idea of a movie better. He just was trying to make Gerard happy about the date since Frank wasn’t the one taking him. 

“I’ve always wanted to see Sweeney Todd,” Gerard said with a small smile. “Maybe it’s a sign or something,” he tried and playfully stuck out his tongue at his little brother. “Bed by nine,” Gerard said with a smile as he checked his buttons on his shirt again. 

“Ten!” Mikey giggled at Gerard who just shook his head.

“Ten,” Gerard said with a small smile and kissed the crown of Mikey’s head. “Now be good, baby,” Gerard whispered and gently fixed Mikey’s cap.

“Be safe, Gee,” Mikey whispered and hugged his brother around his middle, tightly. 

“I will. Always,” Gerard leaned down and kissed Mikey on the cheek softly. He looked down at his baby brother’s face a moment longer before he had to pull away. “I’m meeting him at the theater. He’s got a lot of money, I didn’t want him seeing our house and getting spooked,” Gerard confessed.

“Why?” Mikey asked confused. “What’s wrong with it?” Mikey looked around, trying to see what it was that might scare the man so badly that he would leave.

“Nothing,” Gerard said with a smile before he kissed Mikey’s cheek again. “I’ll see you tonight,” Gerard hummed as he walked down the hallway to the door. “Night, Mikes! Wish me luck!” Gerard chimed as he was about to shut the door.

“Good luck, Gee!” Mikey called and waved before his brother closed the locked door. Mikey’s smile slowly faded after Gerard was gone. He didn’t know what to feel. He wanted his brother to be happy but he wanted him to be happy with Frank. Frank had been nice and Gerard had really liked him. Also, Mikey liked that he had been asked to go too. Sure, he had ruined a lot of the night but he still was happy that someone had finally asked him. He didn’t like being home all alone.

Mikey had been sitting on the couch for about twenty minutes, flicking through channels, and muttering to the television since he didn’t have anyone for conversation. He really just wanted Gerard to come back home and spend some time with him. As he was thinking about when Gerard would be home there was a knock on the door. 

Mikey was so excited in the belief that Gerard had come back that he forgot the rules that Gerard had for him. One of those being, never open the door when home alone. He quickly pulled the door open and his face of excitement changed to one of confusion. Gerard wasn’t the person standing before him, it was Frank, looking shy, and holding a long red rose in his hand. 

“Hey, Mikey,” Frank said with a smile to the younger boy. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a chocolate bar. “I thought you might like this,” Frank said and smiled more when Mikey excitedly took it.

“Thank you, Frank!” Mikey said and he didn’t quite know what to think. He was happy that Frank was back. He grabbed the man's hand and pulled him into his house, closing the door. 

“Is...Is Gerard home?” Frank asked as he looked to Mikey who was closing the door behind him. 

“No, he went on another date with Jason,” Mikey said as he ripped open his candy bar. 

“Who’s Jason?” Frank asked and tried to hide his slightly upset expression from Mikey. He knew it was ridiculous, it was his own fault, he hadn’t called. He would have but he didn’t have Gerard’s number. 

“Gerard said he’s this guy with a lot of money. He’s taking Gerard to the theater to see a play. Sweeney Toad,” Mikey said, wondering if that was right as he was fighting with the wrapper on the candy bar..

“Don’t you mean, Sweeney Todd?” Frank questioned with a smile even though he was a bit saddened on the inside. He gently took the bar from Mikey and opened it for him before handing it back.

“Yeah! That’s it!” Mikey said as he bit into his candy bar. “They went out last week and ate somewhere I guess,” Mikey shrugged as he chewed his chocolate with a happy face.

“Well,” Frank said with a small smile, “Since I no longer have a date tonight. I was wondering if maybe you’d like to come with me to have some fun.”

“Where?” Mikey questioned, nearly foaming at the mouth to get out of the house. 

“Oh, I thought maybe we could go to an arcade. Play some laser tag, go carts, and eat too much pizza,” Frank said with a small smile. Even though he wasn’t going to get his date he figured he could at least take Mikey out for some fun; he had planned on taking the young boy anyway. He knew he was stupid for expecting Gerard to just be there and ready to go out with him.

“Really?!” Mikey jumped up and down and almost couldn’t breath. “Please?! Please?!” Mikey had grabbed hold of Frank’s hand now and was jumping all over. 

Frank laughed and smiled endearingly at Mikey. “Yeah,” he said with a smile. 

“I’ll put on my shoes!” Mikey hollered as he quickly ran down the hallway. 

Frank glanced around the kitchen a little with one of his hands in his pocket and the other holding the red rose he had brought for Gerard. He figured he had missed his chance but he accepted it. He knew he should have found a way to get ahold of Gerard. Things had just came up and had kept him away, he looked sadly to the soft petals on the rose.

Frank looked up and saw a picture on the refrigerator and leaned in to see it better. There was Gerard, younger than he was now, sitting in a hospital bed asleep with a very sick looking Mikey sleeping with his head on Gerard’s chest. Frank frowned softly as he figured Mikey must have had some form of cancer because of his lack of hair. He smiled a little at the picture though. 

He walked over to sink and saw the vase that had held the flowers from last week, now empty. He filled it with water before he placed it on the window sill behind the sink and placed the rose in it. 

“I’m ready!” Mikey said as he ran down the hallway, looking to Frank.

“Alright, let’s leave your brother a note. I don’t think we’ll be gone later than him but we should still be sure,” Frank said, not wanting Gerard to come home and panic. 

Mikey quickly wrote a small note to Gerard explaining that he had gone out with Frank and would be home before ten. Though, he had to ask Frank how to spell arcade. Frank made sure to add his phone number to the bottom in case Gerard wanted Frank to bring Mikey home earlier. 

“Let’s go!” Mikey said excitedly and he got out the door with Frank, locking it before he closed it.

“Uh...do you have a key?” Frank said motioning to the now locked door. 

“Yeah, it’s under the toad,” Mikey said and pointed to a faded, large clay toad on the lawn. 

“Okay,” Frank said with a laugh as they neared his car. He opened the door for Mikey and watched the little form get in before buckling.

* * *

Gerard was sitting in the seat next to Jason and was looking to the stage, watching Mrs. Lovett sing about having the worst pies in London. He couldn’t help but think that he could really end up liking Jason. The man was sweet and he really had a personality that Gerard could love. He also hadn’t even pressed the subject of sex on their first date, another plus. 

Gerard had forced himself to try and forget Frank on their first date and now it was easier. He figured that Jason could soon be better than Frank in just a few more dates. He just needed to get over Frank, he could try. He also tried to ignore how much easier it had been to connect to Frank, he didn’t know why things were harder with Jason.

Gerard felt Jason’s arm drape over his shoulders and he tried to relax a little. He also tried to ignore how it made him uncomfortable. He figured this might just be a ploy to get Gerard to kiss him, many men had used the move on him. He hadn’t felt the discomfort when Frank had tried it with him in the car but Gerard figured it was only because Mikey was between them but then again, he had wanted to kiss Frank. 

He forced himself to smile at Jason and he gave him a little peck on the lips. “Thank you for bringing me,” he whispered with a little blush. 

“No problem. Thank you for coming with me,” he breathed before he lightly pressed his mouth to Gerard’s again. 

Gerard wanted the kiss to stop after a few moments and he leaned back a little to give Jason the hint. Jason didn’t stop, he pressed Gerard’s head closer so he couldn’t move away so Gerard just kept kissing back. Luckily he pulled away a little later and Gerard forced a smile.

Jason linked his fingers with Gerard’s and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek. “Was that too much?” He looked worried and Gerard couldn’t be upset with him anymore. He had to realize that maybe Jason was just a regular guy and really didn't want to push Gerard too far. 

“A...A little,” Gerard looked down and blushed a little. “I’m sorry,” Gerard whispered and looked to Jason.

“Don’t be sorry,” Jason said and his face was sincere. “Just, tell me,” he said with a smile.

“Okay,” Gerard said and he smiled genuinely to Jason before he looked back to the stage but didn’t stop thinking about his hand in Jason’s.

* * *

“Frank, you’re awesome!” Mikey cheered as he was picking up all the tickets that were printing out of the machine. The machine kept cheering, ‘Jackpot.’ “Can I get one of the huge stuffed pigs!” 

Frank laughed and helped Mikey pick up the tickets. “You can get whatever you want, they’re all yours,” Frank smiled at Mikey’s excitement. 

Mikey giggled and jumped up and down before he wrapped his arms around Frank and rested his head on his lower chest. “You’re great, Frank,” Mikey hummed with a smile.

Frank looked down and saw the little form wrapped around him tight. “You’re great too, Mikey,” Frank said softly and gently ran his fingers over Mikey’s cap before he wrapped an arm around Mikey’s back. 

They finally managed to get all their tickets picked up before Frank brought Mikey over to eat. They sat across from each other with a large pepperoni pizza between them and two cokes. 

“So, Frank,” Mikey said as he gnawed on a chunk of cheese, “Do you have brothers or sisters?”

“Uh,” Frank wiped at his mouth with a napkin. “No, I don’t. I would have loved to of had a brother or sister though.”

“Parents?” Mikey asked as he chewed his pizza.

“Uh...my mother passed away when I was younger and I never knew my dad really but he passed away as well,” Frank said with a little shrug. 

“I lost my parents when I was eight,” Mikey said sadly and looked down. 

“Gerard told me. I’m sorry, Mikey,” Frank said with a little frown.

“It’s okay, Frank. I have Gerard,” Mikey said, trying to look on the brightside. “Who do you have?”

Frank was quiet for a moment before he realized the answer. “No one really,” he said quietly. “Some friends though,” he added, trying not to seem too pathetic because he was friends with some of the people from the streets. 

“Frank...did...did I scare you away from, Gerard?” Mikey asked sadly and bit at his lip. 

“Hey, no,” Frank said sincerely and shook his head. “I...I wanted to take Gerard out again but...he wasn’t home,” Frank said quietly. 

“Yeah, Gerard seems to like Jason,” Mikey said with a frown. He didn’t want Gerard to like Jason, he wanted Frank to be with Gerard. 

“Hey, don’t be upset. If Gerard likes him that’s good,” Frank said honestly and smiled. 

“But he’s not you and I really like you,” Mikey said with a little smile. 

“Well, I like you too,” Frank said with a smile. “If Gerard doesn’t mind I’d still like to hang out with you. I’ve always wanted a little brother,” Frank said. 

“Really?!” Mikey said excitedly and he couldn’t help but think about how funny things were now. A guy wanted him now but didn’t want Gerard, things had turned around. 

“Really,” Frank said with a smile. “Now eat your pizza,” Frank said with a little laugh.

* * *

“I really had a good night,” Gerard murmured against Jason’s lips as he was waiting beside the road for his cab. 

“Are you sure I can’t take you home?” Jason asked as he gently tugged Gerard’s coat a little closer around his neck. “I hate to think you’re taking a cab home when I could just bring you. It’s not even a ploy to get into your house. I swear, I would stay in the car,” he offered with a sincere smile.

“No, it’s fine but I appreciate it,” Gerard said with a smile and kissed Jason again. The night had turned out really well between the two of them and Gerard was really starting to like Jason. 

“So, can I take you out again?” Jason asked with a smirk as he hooked his fingers into the belt loops of Gerard’s tight jeans. 

“I think it’s safe to say that you can,” Gerard said with a smile, a tone of light pink covered Gerard’s cheeks. 

“What about Wednesday?” Jason asked with a smile at Gerard’s cute, shyness. 

“In the middle of the week?” Gerard questioned but smiled, he didn’t have a problem with it but he knew that Jason worked.

“I don’t want to wait until next weekend,” Jason said and the charm in his smile made Gerard lightheaded. “So, I could pick you up at six and we could go eat and see a movie? Something a little less fancy? We could relax a little.” 

Gerard smiled and bit his bottom lip, it sounded perfect, and he couldn’t help blushing from Jason wanting to see him again so soon. “Okay but I’ll meet you there,” Gerard offered. “Where do you want to eat?” 

Jason smiled a bit and shook his head, “Alright, there’s a place called Andrew’s a few blocks from here, do you know it?” Gerard nodded, it was a nice place. “We can go and order some meat pies?”

Gerard giggled and kissed Jason once more. “Sounds perfect,” Gerard hummed before he pulled away when the cab pulled up. “I’ll see you, Wednesday,” he said with a tiny wink. “Night.”

“Goodnight, Gerard,” Jason said with a smile and a small wave. He watched the cab pull away from the curb and smiled.

* * *

“Alright,” Frank said as he pulled up outside of Gerard and Mikey’s house. He turned to look to Mikey and saw that he was fast asleep. 

Frank got out of the car and went around to the front lawn. “Alright, Mr. Toad,” Frank said to himself and lifted the heavy clay toad. He saw the key under it in the soil and picked it up before he went and unlocked the door. He popped the door open a little before he went back to his car and opened the passenger seat door.

“Here we go, buddy,” Frank whispered as he unbuckled Mikey and slowly lifted him. Mikey squirmed a little before he wrapped his arms around Frank’s neck. “I’ve got you,” he whispered and Mikey calmed, his head sagging onto Frank’s shoulder. 

Frank slowly walked into the house, being careful of Mikey’s head and feet. He walked into the boy’s room and gently placed him on the bed. “Okay,” he said to Mikey’s sleeping form as he unlaced the boys shoes. He took them off before he grabbed up Mikey’s sheets, noticing they seemed to be too big for the bed, he covered him up. 

Frank smiled down at the content looking boy before he slowly left the room. He went out and got the pizza out of the back of the car. He brought the leftovers and the large, stuffed pig in and put the pizza on the counter before he brought the large pig in to lay next to Mikey. Frank was about to walk out before he paused in the kitchen. He didn’t know if he should leave Mikey but then he knew that Gerard had left Mikey alone to begin with. 

Frank left the house after checking on Mikey one more time and locked the door. Once he was outside he placed the key back under the toad in the yard and smiled at it a little, it was hideous. 

He got into his car and pulled down the street a little. He felt odd watching the house like some stalker but he felt wrong leaving Mikey alone without Gerard being home yet. 

It was half an hour later that a cab pulled up and Gerard got out. Frank leaned a little closer to the windshield so he could see Gerard better. Gerard looked gorgeous and was in a nice outfit, Frank smiled a little at him. 

He shook his head and started his car before he turned around and drove down the rest of the road and turned in the direction of his apartment.

* * *

Gerard’s head turned and he watched the rear end of a black Mustang turn off his street. He looked to the empty spot for a moment and his mind instantly went to Frank. He wondered if that was a foolish thought but then he couldn’t remember the last time he had seen a Mustang even drive down the street. 

He walked up to the front door and unlocked it before he stepped in and set down his keys. He groaned as he shrugged out of his jacket and let out a little yawn, part of him was saddened not to see Mikey awake, even though it was after ten. 

His senses instantly picked up the scent of pizza and he turned to see the box of pizza sitting on the counter, labeled from the local arcade. He was clearly confused and picked up the paper that was sitting beside it.

_”Gerard,_  
Frank came! We are going to the arcade to play games! I will be home by ten!  
Love you!  
Mikey" 

Gerard swayed a little in his spot as he read the note ten times and looked to the phone number that was written at the bottom with, ‘Frank’s Cell,’ written on top of it. He realized he was holding his breath and let it out. 

Gerard quickly went down the hall to where he saw Mikey laying in bed, worn out. A large, pink, stuffed pig laid by his head and Gerard smiled at it a little. He sat himself down next to Mikey and gently pet back his hair, he looked fine, not that he had worried about Frank hurting him. 

“Gee?” Mikey tiredly whispered and his eyes cracked open enough to look up to his brother. 

“Yeah,” Gerard said softly. 

“Did you have a good date?” Mikey asked and smiled a bit.

“Yeah, I did. Jason’s really great,” Gerard whispered. “Where...Where did your piggy come from?” 

Mikey gasped like he was surprised as he turned and saw it. “Frank won a lot of tickets at the arcade! He gave them all to me!” Mikey said excitedly but his voice was a tired whisper. “He brought me a chocolate bar too! Oh! He got you a flower. I think it’s in the kitchen,” Mikey said with a yawn as he rubbed his soft pig.

“Did he...say anything about me?” Gerard asked quietly and tried not to look obvious but he didn’t figure that Mikey would notice anyways. 

“He asked if you were home,” Mikey offered with a small smile. “I told him you were on a date with Jason though,” Mikey said with a small shrug. 

“Oh,” Gerard said and nodded but he looked down a little. “Well, I love you,” he whispered before he leaned down and kissed Mikey’s cheek. 

“I love you too, Gee,” Mikey said with another yawn, this one louder. “Night,” he whispered and nuzzled into his pillow as he held onto his pig, his arm not long enough to even wrap halfway around it. 

“Night, Mikes,” Gerard whispered before he left the boy’s room and stood out in the hall, pulling the door closed. He looked down the hall to the kitchen before he walked to the sink, seeing the lone rose sitting in the vase on the sill.

Gerard gently reached up and lightly brushed his fingers over the pedals before he quietly sighed and looked down. “Fuck,” he mumbled and rubbed at his eyes.

Gerard walked down the hall to his room and landed on the bed, hoping to just sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, I didn't take forever to update! 
> 
> The plot thickens!
> 
> Hope you enjoyed!


	16. Chapter 16

Mikey wasn’t sure what had happened to Gerard but he had been mostly okay before he had received a phone call early Monday morning. Now he was curled up on the couch in his pajamas watching TV, looking miserable. Mikey stood at the end of the hall and looked to him as he chewed on his bottom lip. 

“Gee?” Mikey asked quietly and looked to his older brother. “Is there something wrong?” 

Gerard slowly looked to his little brother and shifted on the couch. “Um...no. I’m okay.” Gerard said and looked back to the television. “I um… I have an appointment tomorrow. I have to go see the doctor.”

“Are you okay?” Mikey asked and walked over to sit next to his older brother. He was really worried now. 

“I am fine. I just have to go and get a shot and a prescription,” Gerard said quietly and continued to stare at the screen playing before them.

“It’ll be okay, Gee. Do you want me to go with you? I’ll hold your hand when you get your shot,” Mikey said with a small smile, trying to be helpful. He knew that Gerard hated needles and he just wanted to help.

“No,” Gerard said flatly and shifted to cover himself more with the blanket he was wrapped in. “It’s better for you to stay home.” 

“Oh, okay,” Mikey said quietly and looked down for a moment. “When’s your appointment?” 

“Around noon,” Gerard sighed and rubbed at his eyes. 

“Okay.” Mikey got up and walked towards the kitchen where he got himself water from the sink. He sipped it before he noticed the wilting rose in the vase over the sink. He grabbed it and walked over to the trash can with it.

“Hey, uh,” Gerard stood up and slowly wandered over. “I’ll take care of that,” Gerard said as he took the rose from Mikey’s hand. He walked down the hall and into his room with it. He was gone for a few moments before he came back out, without the rose. He walked back over to the couch and laid down, covering up again.

Mikey felt like his brother didn’t want him around. He frowned and looked down, he’d been feeling that way a lot lately, he didn’t want to though. He wanted his older brother to be happy again and to love him. He slowly turned and figured he would just go to his room and not bother Gerard anymore.

“Hey,” Mikey turned when he heard Gerard call him. “Come here,” Gerard whispered and opened his arms, pulling his blanket open.

Mikey smiled a bit and walked over, hiding into Gerard’s chest. He felt loved when Gerard wrapped him up in his arms and the warm blanket. He nuzzled his nose into his brother's neck and yawned.

“I love you, Mikey,” Gerard whispered and kissed Mikey’s hair softly. “I’m sorry I haven’t been here for you.” Gerard knew he’d done wrong by being so distant with Mikey. He wanted to break down the wall between them. “I know I haven’t made you feel important lately and that’s wrong,” he added. “You’re the most important thing to me.” Gerard nuzzled his nose into Mikey’s cheek. 

“I know, Gee,” Mikey squeaked and he placed his tiny lips on Gerard’s cheek. “You don’t have to tell me,” Mikey smiled and he contently rested his hands on Gerard’s sides. He felt the warm skin that covered Gerard’s ribs but frowned a bit when he touched them. “Gee, you’re really skinny,” Mikey commented and frowned. 

“That’s good. I used to be pudgy. Remember?” Gerard said and drastically puffed out his cheeks, just trying to get Mikey off the topic. 

Mikey giggled and smooshed Gerard’s cheek, giggling more when Gerard’s mouth blew a raspberry. “I’ve always loved you. It doesn’t matter what you look like,” Mikey smiled. 

“If only everyone felt that way,” Gerard said with a small smile but Mikey sensed there was an underlying problem by Gerard’s tone. “But I’ve always loved you too.” 

“Even when I was really sick and I lost all my hair...and I...got real pale...and thin...and my skin was gray?” Mikey frowned and fidgeted uncomfortably. He tried not to sound so vulnerable and sad but his voice came out that way.

Gerard kissed the top of Mikey’s head and pulled him so close. “Always, always, always,” Gerard whispered and snuggled closely to his little brother. 

“I was ugly then,” Mikey said sadly. 

“You were never ugly,” Gerard said firmly but tender enough that Mikey looked up to him. “I have all those photo albums in my room and they are full of pictures of the cutest little boy I’ve ever seen,” Gerard said with a bit of a smile before he kissed Mikey’s forehead. 

“You’re the best older brother I could ever have,” Mikey whispered before he hid himself into Gerard’s chest. 

Gerard smiled as he felt so good with Mikey close to him. “And you’re the best little brother I could ever have,” Gerard hummed back. He kept his arms tightly around Mikey as he watched his show and Mikey napped.

* * *

“S-So what is it again?” Gerard asked quietly as he was sitting on the exam table. He was trying not to look at the needle that Dr. Matthews had in his hand. 

“Penicillin. It will wipe out the syphilis,” he said quietly as he prepped the needle. 

“And the prescription will wipe out the chlamydia?” Gerard asked quietly, still looking away. He didn’t want to see the needle and he really didn’t want to make eye contact with the person who knew he had two stds.

“Yes. You’ll have to take them for seven days,” he said and Gerard got nervous when he felt the wet, cold swab rubbing over his arm. “Gerard, I only say this because I care about your health. When they said you had tests come back positive I was scared you had HIV. You need to use condoms, all the time.”

Gerard’s eyes watered but he nodded. When the doctor had called him on Monday he had almost had a heart attack. When he heard he had positive results he almost fainted and still had felt horrible, even knowing they were treatable. He had just felt dirty and wrong knowing he had contracted diseases from strangers. 

“Here we go” the doctor quickly stuck Gerard and did it as quickly as possible before he pulled the needle out. He knew how badly Gerard hated needles. “All done,” he said as he pulled the needle from Gerard’s arm. “So, will you think about this next time?”

Gerard nodded and sniffed as his nose was running. “I was so scared,” he admitted as he hugged himself. ‘I...I thought it was going to be bad and I was going to die or something. What would happen to Mikey?” Gerard covered his face as he broke down. “I just kept thinking about what you said last time.” 

“I know but it’s okay. Within the week you’re going to be clean again but this was a warning, Gerard,” Dr. Matthew’s said, seeing that Gerard was finally taking him seriously. 

“I know. Thank you,” Gerard said and sniffled again before he stood up and hugged his doctor. 

“You’re welcome, Gerard. Now go home to your brother,” Dr. Matthew’s said with a bit of a smile as he let Gerard go.

Gerard let out a little laugh that mixed with his sob before he nodded. He slowly left the room and just tried to forget everything that had happened inside it.

* * *

“I’m home,” Mikey heard Gerard holler when he came through the door. Mikey quickly got up and ran out of his room. He saw Gerard open his arms and he ran up to him and jumped up, hugging him. “Oh, my heavy, baby,” Gerard giggled and he held Mikey to him. “I missed you.”

“I missed you too,” Mikey smiled and kissed Gerard’s cheek before he rested his head on his shoulder. “Was the doctor okay?”

“Yeah, the doctor was fine,” Gerard said as he carefully set Mikey on the counter so he could take his pills.

“What are those for?” Mikey asked, glancing to them nervously.

“They’re just for headaches,” Gerard lied. 

“Oh,” Mikey hummed and leaned back a little before frowning. “Do...Do I give you headaches?” 

Gerard dry swallowed his pill before he put them in the cupboard and turned to Mikey. “No, never,” Gerard said and smiled at his little brother. 

“Are you working tonight?” Mikey asked and hoped his older brother wasn’t going out. He missed his brother and now that they were getting along again he wanted him home all the time. 

Gerard thought for a moment on it. He knew he was low on money but his ego wasn’t really up for it. He figured he could go on his date tomorrow and then work the next day. He figured he really shouldn’t sleep with Jason, so he was hoping it wouldn’t come up. 

“No, I’m going to stay home with you,” Gerard said with a smile and saw Mikey return it. 

“Can we invite Frank over?” Mikey asked with a smile and looked to his brother. 

“Oh, um, I don’t know,” Gerard said and looked down a little. He really didn’t know if Frank would want to come hang out with them. He also didn’t know if it would be a good idea for himself to be around Frank. He figured it could be bad, especially when he was suppose to be going out with Jason. He couldn’t just throw him away, he was a nice guy and he had the money that Gerard needed for Mikey’s bills. 

“Maybe in a few days,” Gerard said and walked over to the fridge, looking into the freezer. “Hm, how do you feel about chicken patties and french fries?” 

“Sounds good.” Mikey was watching Gerard with a smile. Gerard hadn’t cooked anything in a long time, it was nice to seem him doing it again, even if it was just frozen dinner. “Gerard?” Mikey watched his older brother turn and look at him, asking what he wanted with his expression. Mikey was going to tell Gerard that he thought he should go back out with Frank but then he also knew that Gerard said that he liked Jason so he said nothing. 

“What?” Gerard asked with a small laugh at his quiet brother. 

“I love you.” Mikey figured that was a better response, he didn’t want to make his brother feel sad. 

“I love you too,” Gerard said with a smile before he kissed Mikey’s forehead.

* * *

“Well if you hold still it won’t take so long!” Gerard laughed as Mikey squirmed and giggled. “Why is cutting your toenails such a chore?” 

“Because your fingers tickle,” Mikey squeaked and giggled as he kicked his toes lightly. 

“Done!” Gerard laughed after he clipped the final pinky toe. “Jeez, you were cutting me to death with those blades,” Gerard teased before he set the clippers on the coffee table and laid back down, pulling Mikey to lay with him again. 

“One scratch and you screamed like a little girl,” Mikey teased back. 

“I will need stitches!” Gerard screeched dramatically. 

Mikey giggled and nuzzled his brother. “You’re so funny.” 

Gerard smiled as he wrapped his arm around his little brother, He was glad that Mikey was having a good time. He couldn’t remember the last time that he had spent so much time with Mikey. He was enjoying himself more than he had in a while. 

“So, is it okay if I still go out with Frank sometimes?” Mikey asked shyly after a moment. 

Gerard was a little taken aback by the sudden question and he glanced down to his little brother. He knew that Mikey didn’t get to go out and do much, that Frank could be a good thing for him. He sighed through his nose silently and nodded. “I think it would be good for you to go out with Frank. It could be a lot of fun,” Gerard said and did his best to smile. 

He knew it was going to be odd to see Frank around from time to time but he figured he could put up with it for Mikey. “Just make sure you don’t call and bug him to take you somewhere. He’s usually pretty busy,” Gerard added. 

“I won’t,” Mikey said and smiled wide. “I’m just going to call and give him our number,” Mikey said as he jumped up and got the phone. 

“O-Oh? Right now?” Gerard suddenly felt nervous and the phone Mikey was holding seemed more like a bomb. He shifted a little and sat up as Mikey dialed. 

Mikey set down the paper with Frank’s number on it once he was done dialing and sat by Gerard. He listened to the phone ring and he prayed that Frank would answer.

Gerard subtly shifted himself closer to Mikey so that he could listen to the phone ringing. He bit his lip when he heard the phone click like someone was answer.

“Hello?” Came Frank’s voice.

“Frank!” Mikey said excitedly.

“Hey, buddy,” Gerard heard Frank greet Mikey happily and he smiled a little. 

“I wanted to call you so that you’d have our number! I wanna see you again,” Mikey said hopefully. “I had fun the other night! Thank you for taking me!”

“I told you that you don’t have to thank me. I had just as much fun,” Frank said. “When did you want to hang out again?”

Mikey looked to Gerard and pulled the phone from his ear. “Can we go out tomorrow night when you’re not home?” 

Gerard smiled for Mikey and nodded a little. “Tell him to come around five if he can,” Gerard said. He was secretly hoping that he could see Frank a little before leaving for his date. 

“What about five tomorrow? Can you come?” Mikey asked and Gerard smiled endearingly as Mikey silently crossed his fingers.

“Really!?” Mikey nearly jumped up and down on the couch and grinned wide. “Okay! Will you be here?” Mikey suddenly asked Gerard.

Gerard hesitated before he nodded, wondering why Frank had asked Mikey to ask him. He could tell that Mikey had asked for him. 

“Yeah, he will,” Mikey said and then smiled. “Alright. I’ll see you tomorrow. Okay. Bye Frank.” Mikey shut off the phone and went to put it back on the base. 

“He said he wanted to talk to you before we leave so he can make sure that you’re okay with it and that he has your number,” Mikey finally explained. 

“Oh,” Gerard said and nodded but he smiled. Something about the fact that his number was going to being in Frank’s phone made him feel good.

Gerard was happy that he had the excuse of the date because then he would look really good when Frank came to pick up Mikey. He didn’t know if that was a bad thought to have when he was supposed to be going out on a date with a guy he liked, he kind of felt a little guilty. 

“Well I’m going to be here,” Gerard said with a bit of a smile. 

“Good. No flirting,” Mikey teased and giggled. 

“I will do what I want!” Gerard laughed at Mikey.

“So you still like him?” Mikey tried to hide how hopeful he was. 

“Well, a bit, yeah,” Gerard said with a little nod.

“Why don’t you ask him back out?” Mikey suggested and smiled a little.

“I would but I’m dating Jason right now and I don’t want to mess it up. He’s actually a really nice guy,” Gerard said with a small frown. He almost wished that Jason had ended up being an asshole. 

“Well, will you ask him out again if Jason dumps you?” Mikey asked. 

“I might,” Gerard said with a small smile and he couldn’t figure out which he wanted. He didn’t want Jason to dump him but part of him did because then he could ask Frank out. He just sighed through his nose, he didn’t want to keep discussing relationships with Mikey. “Alright, enough of this.”

“Hey, come cuddle me?” Gerard asked and smiled a little. 

Mikey ran over and jumped onto Gerard before he nuzzled into him and went back to watching the TV with him. He yawned after a while and his eyes felt like they were burning but he didn’t want to go to sleep, he wanted to finish his episode and spend more time with Gerard. He thought he’d be able to keep himself up but soon his eyes dipped closed and he was lightly snoring.

“Oh, baby boy,” Gerard whispered and picked Mikey up with him. He went down the hall and carefully placed Mikey down in his bed before going out to shut off the television. He yawned and stretched before he checked that the door was locked and went back to his room. 

He carefully scooted Mikey over before he laid behind him and pulled Mikey’s back to his chest and wrapped him up in his arms. “I love you,” Gerard hummed to his sleeping brother before he fell asleep himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I know this is kind of a filler chapter but things still happened and there was some bro love! 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed!


	17. Chapter 17

Gerard had hurried around to get ready early so he’d look cute when Frank arrived. It didn’t take long but he cleaned up the house a little and found himself nervously pulling at his fingers when it was about the time for Frank to arrive. He was pacing around in the kitchen and trying not to stare out the window every time a car went by. 

“I’m ready,” Mikey said with a smile as he came out of his room. He was excited to go out and spend some time with somebody, anybody. He was so tired of being home alone most nights. 

“You look cute,” Gerard said with a smile and fixed Mikey’s small beanie. “He should be here soon,” Gerard comment and his heart jumped into his throat, almost stealing his words when there was a knock on the door. 

“He’s here! He’s here!” Mikey cheered and ran to the door, unlocking it.

Gerard ran his fingers through his hair and sighed out, trying to calm himself. He could do this, he just had to focus on what he wanted to say and do but his problem was, he didn’t know what he wanted to do or say.

“Hey, buddy,” Frank said with a smile and he handed Mikey a small piggy. “I figured he could go with your fat mama pig,” Frank joked with a laugh.

Mikey squealed and giggled as he grabbed the pig from Frank. “He’s perfect,” Mikey said with a large smile. “What are we going to do tonight?”

“How do you feel about a movie?” Frank asked with a smile as he walked into the house a little more. His eyes met Gerard’s and he shot him a small smile and a wave before putting his attention back on Mikey. “And I need someone to help me pick out bed sheets!” 

Gerard realized he must have problems when he found himself longing to go pick out bed sheets with Frank instead of going out with Jason. He just turned himself so he wasn’t looking towards Frank anymore, he couldn’t keep staring at him. 

Mikey nodded and giggled at Frank’s mention of bed sheets. “Let me go put my piggy away! I’ll be right back!” Mikey quickly turned and ran down the hallway.

“Hey,” Frank said, looking to Gerard’s back. 

“Hey,” Gerard said quietly, turning himself around to face Frank. There was a moment of silence between them. “I...Thank you for taking him out. He…,” Gerard crossed his arms and looked down a little. “He really needs a friend,” Gerard said and tried not to frown sadly but he did. 

“It’s not a problem. He’s a great kid,” Frank said with a bit of a smile. “I enjoy spending time with him,” Frank said honestly. He didn’t have a lot of friends or people to hang out with so being able to hang out with Mikey was fun for Frank as well. There was no pressure with Mikey, that made things a lot easier for Frank. 

Gerard smiled sadly and looked to Frank, it meant a lot to him that Frank liked Mikey. Then Gerard looked down, he thought he should explain himself to Frank. Let him know that he hadn't intended on going out with someone else if he had known that Frank would be back. 

"Frank...about the other night when you showed up and I was gone on a date I...," Gerard went to finish but Mikey came out of his room. Now things felt more awkward between him and Frank since he had brought up Frank coming to take him out. 

"I'm ready," Mikey said with a smile and then went to Gerard, hugging him. "I love you," Mikey said with a smile. 

"I love you too, babe. Be good for Frank and be safe," Gerard whispered before he kissed his brother's cheek and fixed his beenie again with an endearing smile, it was never straight. 

"I will. Always," Mikey said with a smile and Gerard kissed the top of Mikey's head. “Let’s go!” Mikey said excitedly and ran past Frank and out to his car, leaving the two alone for a moment.

Gerard didn’t have the words to even begin to explain anything now and he just felt stupid and awkward as he looked to the floor. He had somehow managed to make things even worse without knowing it was possible. He just kept his arms crossed over his chest, hugging himself as Frank hesitated. 

“Hey,” Frank said softly and Gerard shifted his eyes up to him. “We’re okay,” Frank said gently and gave Gerard a small smile. 

“We are?” Gerard asked and he felt like a huge weight had been lifted from him, he almost wanted to cry from the relief. 

“Yeah,” Frank said with a genuine smile, even if it was only a little one. “I understand and you don’t have to worry about it. This Jason guy is really lucky,” Frank said with a bit of a smile. Gerard looked at Frank, confused and it only showed Frank how badly Gerard had been treated by men in the last few years to think so little of himself. 

“You look gorgeous,” Frank complimented softly, signifying what he meant. He smiled when Gerard’s cheeks went pink and he looked down, his gaze shy. “I hope you have fun. I better go before Mikey starts honking the horn,” Frank joked with a playful smile. “I’ll have him home by ten,” Frank said before he waved and headed out. 

Gerard followed him to the door so he could wave to Mikey who was sitting in the passenger seat of Frank’s car. Mikey smiled wide and waved back to him and Gerard felt even more relief. Mikey was happy, he wasn’t going to have to stay home alone, and Gerard preferred it that way.

* * *

“So you like art?” Jason questioned with a smile as he sipped his wine. 

“Yeah,” Gerard said shyly and kind of shook his head. “It’s silly really but I just really love to create things. Anything,” he sighed dreamily, thinking over the days when his room was stocked with art supplies. “I haven’t done much of it recently though. I hope to get back to it one day,” he said honestly as he sipped his water. 

“Are you both ready to order?” The waitress asked with a small smile as she came up to the table. 

Jason ordered his own plate and Gerard had picked out a pasta dish that had sounded good and was about to hand the waitress his menu when Jason interjected. “Oh, I’ve had that. It’s really heavy and the sauce isn’t so great. Maybe you’d like the chicken canzanese, it’s better.”

“O-Oh,” Gerard said and had his menu held in midair to the waitress. He felt like he should at least see what the dish had in it but he felt too awkward. He didn’t want to make the waitress wait longer and he just felt embarrassed. “That’s fine,” he said with a smile and a shrug before he handed his menu to the waitress. “Thank you,” he said to her with a bit of a smile. 

“So, can I ask you another question? And I hope you won’t find me rude,” Jason said with a small smile. 

Gerard nodded to him as he fixed his posture where he had slouched a bit in his chair. He gaze his undivided attention to Jason now.

“What’s with the makeup? Do you like wearing it?” Jason asked and motioned to Gerard’s eyes. Gerard could tell by his tone that he didn’t really care for it so he figured he should say that he didn’t. 

“Oh,” Gerard motioned to them and swallowed a little. Truth was, sometimes he did like wearing it. He just liked the way he looked when he had it on, he’d never had a date bring it up before but then he couldn’t remember the last time he’d been on three successful dates like he had been with Jason. “No, I just know that some men like it,” Gerard lied. 

“Well you look nice with it, don’t get me wrong, you’re beautiful but I think it would be nice to see you without it,” Jason said with a charming smile and Gerard returned with his own. “Maybe on our next date I could see you without it?” Jason suggested this with a smile and a nonchalant air about it, like it didn’t matter either way but Gerard was worried about messing up their next date if he said no.

“Sure. Like I said, I don’t really care for it anyway,” he said with a smile but he really didn’t know if he would be comfortable. His makeup was like a mask he could hide behind, he didn’t like going out without it. He’d only ever gone out with someone without makeup on once and it was...Frank. Gerard bit his lip and looked down as he thought about it. He hadn’t felt awkward without it with Frank, it had seemed like it didn’t matter. 

“Good. Then it’s decided,” Jason said with his charming smile and Gerard instantly forgot his discomfort and smiled back. 

“So,” Jason sighed out with a smile. “What do you do for a living?” 

This part was always hard for Gerard because he couldn’t lie exactly but he couldn’t divulge the whole truth. If he lied that would lead to him explaining later and possibly upsetting his partner but if he told the truth, he sometimes lost them anyway and sooner but Gerard knew sooner was better. 

“I’m an escort,” Gerard said calmly, hoping the topic would remain a calm one. 

“Oh, like...you go out with men who hire you?” Jason asked cautiously, looking at Gerard with slightly squinted eyes, like he was trying to figure him out. 

“Yes,” Gerard said, retaining his calm voice that signified that there shouldn’t be anything wrong with that. 

“So is that good business?” Jason asked as he sipped his wine again but Gerard noted he took a bigger amount than normal. 

“It is. It pays my bills and keeps me taken care of,” Gerard said and moved his gaze to a nearby couple instead of Jason’s eyes. 

“Well, what if you had a man to take care of you? Would you quit?” Jason asked and tilted his head a little, like he was trying to catch Gerard’s attention. “If things got, serious?” 

“I would,” Gerard said strongly and smiled a bit, returning his eyes to Jason. He knew Jason was taking this seriously and was going to be alright with it and he had hinted towards them becoming something serious, Gerard like the sounds of that.

* * *

Frank’s eyes eased open a little and he saw his television screen playing a cartoon on it. He slowly eased up his head and glanced around before he noticed a comfortable, warm weight leaning against his side. He smiled softly as he saw Mikey nuzzled into his side and yawned a bit after. He was about to let his head sink back down onto the back of the couch when it snapped back up and he checked his phone. It was a little more than half past eleven and he had five missed calls and three voicemails. . 

“Fuck,” he hissed before he slowly eased himself up and Mikey down on the couch. He managed to do it without waking the small form and walked over to the kitchen. He saw that the calls were all from Gerard and checked his voicemail. 

He heard the automated voice tell him he got the first one at half past ten. “Hi, Frank. It’s Gerard. I don’t mean to be a worry wart but I got home and Mikey’s not here. Just wondering when you’ll both be getting back. Call me please?” 

The next message came at about eleven. “Frank, it’s Gerard again. I really need Mikey home, it’s late, he shouldn’t be out still. I...I’m not mad just please bring him home. Call me.” Frank rubbed at his eyes as he could hear how Gerard’s voice wavered on the border of fright. 

The next message had been only a few moments before half past eleven. “Frank…,” there was a pause, like Gerard didn’t even know what to say. Frank hung his head as Gerard sounded like he was frantic and about to cry. “Please bring Mikey back. I need him home right now. I...It’s so late and you’re not calling me and we….we said ten. _You_ said ten and it’s almost midnight. Just…,” the phone clicked and the automated voice told him there was no more messages on his phone. 

Frank quickly dialed Gerard’s number, seeing it was almost twelve now, and it hardly finished the first ring before Gerard picked up. “Frank! Frank bring him home to me now! I can’t believe you!” And Frank looked down because Gerard was wrecked on the other end of the phone, he was nearly sobbing. 

“Gerard...Gerard listen I’m so fucking sorry. We fell asleep on the couch watching cartoons! I brought him back here after the movie and going shopping so we could eat and we both fell asleep I didn’t mean for it. You have to know that I didn’t do this on purpose and I know it’s no excuse but he’s okay, please calm down,” Frank rattled nervous and roughly dragged his fingers through his hair, pushing it back. He glanced to Mikey;s sleeping form on the couch, his chest gently rising and falling. 

Frank closed his eyes as Gerard just started sobbing on the other end of the phone. “I...I was so scared,” he squeaked and Frank could hear his harsh breathing. “My mind went through every possible scenario and it got so dark and scary. Please bring him to me,” Gerard cried and Frank found his own eyes watering. He had scared the ever living shit out of Gerard and he felt so fucking bad for it. 

“I will. I will put him in the car right now Gerard. I am so sorry. Are you okay?” Frank asked, his voice timid as he asked the question and he wiped under his eyes gently. 

“I just need him,” Gerard cried through the phone and Frank nodded.

“I’ll be there soon. Do you want me to stay on the line with you until I get there?” Frank offered as he slowly went over to Mikey. The boy was worn out, Frank knew that was certain, and he didn’t know if Mikey was really ready to wake up yet. “Come here,” he whispered gently when Mikey stirred a little, feeling Frank’s arms sneak under him. 

Mikey yawned tiredly and clung to Frank before he rested his head against his chest. “Frankie?” Mikey asked quietly but his eyes were still closed and he sounded like he was still asleep. 

“Yeah. I’m right here,” Frank whispered softly as he was carrying Mikey out and the phone was still cradled against his ear by his shoulder. Mikey seemed to calm after that and nuzzle closer to Frank, falling back into complete slumber. 

“Please just call me if anything holds you up?” Gerard asked and Frank quietly said that he would before they both hung up.

* * *

Gerard was sitting on the couch with one of Mikey’s hats clutched in his hands. He had been so afraid when he had come home to an empty house. His mind had gone to possible accidents, one of them getting hurt, or even worse, that Frank had taken off with his little brother. Gerard had started shaking, started sobbing, he half believed that he had ripped out most of his hair but it was still there, just in a messy form of it’s former self. 

He thought back to how relieved he had been when Frank had explained that they had just fallen asleep. Gerard was now a bit calmer but he knew his glistening eyes and shaky voice wouldn’t go away until Mikey was back in his arms and safe. He then thought of when Frank had went to get Mikey. He had heard Frank’s gentle voice and then Mikey ask his name.

_“Yeah. I’m right here.”_

Those words played in Gerard’s head, spinning in circles. Frank’s voice had sounded so tender and caring for Mikey and that was something Gerard wanted for Mikey, for someone to care for him. He bit his lip softly and wonder about if it was a bad idea to keep going with Jason when Frank was so much easier. Frank knew about Mikey and Gerard’s job and held none of it against Gerard. He just sighed and knew he had to keep trying with Jason, even if he wanted to go back to trying on being with Frank. 

Jason seemed to have more money and so far was doing alright in Gerard’s book. They even had another date, that would be four successful, fun dates that Gerard had had with Jason. He figured it wouldn’t matter to try going out with Frank now anyway. He had heard that Frank didn’t date much so he could just let his relationship with Jason run it’s course and if things didn’t work out, he could go back to Frank 

Gerard's head slowly rose up when he heard a car door shut and he turned his head to look out the window, seeing the black Mustang parked out front and Frank running around the hood to the passenger side. Gerard quickly got up and went out the front door, seeing Frank carrying Mikey too him. 

"Gerard, I am so sorry," Frank whispered as Mikey remained asleep in his arms. 

"Just give him to me," Gerard nearly whined as he carefully took his little brother from Frank. He checked over him and saw that he looked completely fine, not a mark on him. 

Frank stood where he was as Gerard went in, not sure if he should follow or not, he knew Gerard could be mad at him.

"Frank, please come in?" Gerard whispered before he brought Mikey to his room and laid him down. Gerard was okay now, everything was now that Mikey was in his bed where he belonged. Gerard had paced the hall and each time he had passed the door and seen the bed empty his stomach had churned. 

Frank came in the house and quietly closed the door. He felt horrible for what he had done so he crammed his hands in his pockets and just looked to the floor. He could hear Gerard in the bedroom softly cooing to Mikey as he was taking off his jacket and shoes. Frank figured that Gerard wanted to give him a piece of his mind and Frank completely understood. He shouldn’t have fallen asleep with Mikey. 

Gerard slowly came out of Mikey’s room and ran his fingers through his hair before quietly sniffling. He rubbed at his eyes a bit, smearing the remainder of makeup he had on. He huffed before he let his arms fall, making a quiet smack when they hit his legs.

Frank frowned as he looked to how worn out and worked up Gerard looked. “Gerard...I know it doesn’t change anything but I am so sorry,” Frank breathed out with a small sigh. “I didn’t mean to scare you and I know I was foolish. I shouldn’t have fallen asleep. I’m an idiot,” Frank rambled before he just hung his head again. 

Gerard slowly walked up to Frank before he wrapped his arms around him and sniffled. Frank had brought Mikey back and that was all Gerard could think of at the moment. Mikey looked perfectly fine and was contently sleeping now. Gerard rested his head onto Frank’s shoulder and let his eyes slip shut when he felt Frank’s hands run over his back to sooth him. 

“I’m not mad,” Gerard whispered since his mouth was so close to Frank’s ear. “I was just scared. I know you didn’t mean to do it on purpose,” Gerard hummed and God it felt good to be so close to someone. Frank was warm and his arms hugged onto Gerard tightly and he smelt so good. Gerard didn’t get this much with another person, genuine intimacy. Frank’s fingers were tenderly running through his hair while the arm around his waist held him close and tight to Frank. He felt so safe and he just wanted to nuzzle himself into Frank and not let go but he did. Gerard slowly eased himself away from Frank and just looked at him for a moment.

Frank looked to Gerard and resisted every urge inside him that told him to use the hand that was still lightly resting on the back of Gerard’s neck and to pull Gerard’s mouth to his. He wanted to kiss the younger man and show him that he cared but he let the hand slide from Gerard’s neck when he saw a small hickey there and thought of Jason. Frank wanted Gerard but he wasn’t going to go about it the wrong way. Gerard didn’t deserve that. 

Gerard could sense Frank pulling away from him more now and let him go before he bit his lip and looked to his feet. “Did you both have fun?” He asked quietly, looking back up to Frank. 

“Yeah, we did,” Frank said with an endearing smile that was only slightly weighed down by the recent scare he’d put Gerard through. “He ate popcorn at the movie theater,” Frank stopped and laughed a bit, “the whole bag. I figured that I had let him ruin his dinner but he was fine. We went back to my place and I made him a cheeseburger and fries. Oh! And he actually helped me pick out bed sheets.” Frank giggled a little at the last part. 

Gerard smiled a bit as he heard about Mikey’s night, happy that he had had fun. “What color are the bedsheets?” He asked, wanting to picture them with the dark red walls of Frank’s room. 

“We picked out black,” Frank said with a smile. 

Gerard knew how warm and soft Frank’s bed always was. He often thought about Frank having him over and messing around in those sheets. Now he could picture them both rolling around in the dark sheets with the red walls, Frank above him, looking down at him like he meant so much and was so special as he drove Gerard crazy by rolling his hips. Gerard looked down at the thought, he knew no one would ever find him special. 

“Well it’ll look nice in your room,” Gerard said with a bit of a smile and tried to hide his yawn. 

Frank smiled at him before he took a step back. “I’ll let you get some rest.” Frank said beginning to leave for the door before he stopped, his hand on the knob. “I forgot to ask...did your date go well?” 

Gerard glanced up to Frank, waiting to see a face that was hopeful for disaster but he didn’t. Frank was asking him with a face that just said he was curious for Gerard’s sake. Gerard had kind of wished that Frank would show a little jealousy at first but then realized that it was nice for Frank not to give him a hard time. 

“Y-Yeah,” Gerard said quietly and hugged himself again. “We’re going out again on Saturday,” Gerard said with a small shrug and a smile. 

“Good,” Frank said and he looked and sounded sincere. “Can...Can I take Mikey out on Saturday? I can understand if you’d rather I didn’t after tonight,” Frank said with a crooked frown. 

“No...No I want you to take him out,” Gerard said with a bit of a smile. “He really likes you, Frank,” Gerard hummed out as he looked to the other man. 

“Well, I really like you both too. Night Gerard,” Frank said with a warm smile before he left through the door once Gerard had waved at him.

It was after Frank had left that the words sunk in, that Frank liked them both. Gerard smiled bigger than he should have before he went through the house, clicking off a few lights. He made sure to lock the door before he went down the hall and crawled into Mikey’s twin bed with him, pulling him close. He kissed Mikey’s forehead and let the smaller body burrow into him as he rested his own eyes. Gerard yawned before he nuzzled against the top of Mikey’s head and let himself find sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is late. I had a friend come over for a night, which turned into a week, and he brought his kids. I was distracted playing with little ones! Forgive me! 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed it!


	18. Chapter 18

“Frank?” Mikey asked as he tilted his head back from his spot in the grass. Frank had picked him up in the early afternoon and they were both now in the park having a picnic. Frank had asked Gerard if he had wanted to come, if he had time before his date but he had said he couldn’t. Mikey had seen how badly his older brother had wanted to. 

“Wassup, kiddo?” Frank asked from his spot next to Mikey, laying on his back with his arms behind his head. He tilted his gaze to Mikey, looking at him through his aviators. 

“You like my brother, right?” Mikey asked and he rolled onto his side, letting himself rest his head on Frank’s soft, gray shirt. 

“Of course I do, bud,” Frank said with a bit of a smile, wondering where this was going. Mikey always seemed to have underlying thoughts. Frank could tell by the way Mikey would randomly voice things and then stop himself, like he had thought better of speaking his mind. 

“Even though he has me?” Mikey asked insecurely and looked down a little, playing with a piece of grass with his fingers. 

Frank smiled, sadly. He figured that Mikey had been through as much as a hardship as Gerard. Maybe not quite as severe but still all the same. Mikey had been hidden like he was something bad but Frank understood Gerard’s intentions. He didn’t want Mikey meeting all the men that came into Gerard’s life. It wouldn’t be healthy for Mikey to meet these people and then to lose them. Frank hoped he could be something steady for Mikey. 

“Especially because he has you,” Frank said softly and he leaned over, kissing the top of Mikey’s head. He felt the small body nuzzle closer to his side and he smiled a bit more before he rested his head back. He moved one arm from behind his head and wrapped it around Mikey. “You’re awesome, Mikey.”

Mikey smiled and hugged onto Frank. This was the only other person besides Gerard he was beginning to spend regular time with and he liked it. It was nice to have Frank around.

Frank could hear kids laughing and he looked over to the park where more of the kids were, kids Mikey’s age. “Hey,” Frank said quietly, having an idea. He figured Mikey would be too shy to make friends on his own so he would have to help him, trick him into it, in a way. “I wanted to go play tag with those kids but I don’t want to go by myself. You wanna come with me?” 

Mikey glanced over to the kids chasing each other around and then looked to Frank shyly. “I-I don’t know,” he said and his face was a little uncomfortable. 

“Please?” Frank asked and playfully pouted out his lips. 

Mikey smiled a bit at Frank’s goofy expression before he nodded. “Okay, I guess so,” Mikey said with a little smile before he stood up. He reached out and grabbed Frank’s hand, helping him up, even though Frank didn’t pull on him much. 

“Let’s go,” Frank said with a smile and Mikey walked up beside him and grabbed onto his tattooed hand. Frank had on a gray, blue flannel button up which he had left unbuttoned with the gray shirt under it. He had the sleeves rolled halfway up his arms, which allowed Mikey to get a better look at Frank’s tattoos. 

“You like pictures too?” Mikey asked and looked to Frank’s arms.

Frank noticed where Mikey was looking and smiled a bit “I do,” he said honestly. “I like my ink,” he said being a bit more specific. 

“I like them too,” Mikey commented and rubbed at Frank’s arm a little. 

Frank was getting closer to the group with Mikey and he could see the boy shying back a little, trying to hide behind Frank. He knew he had to distract the boy. “So, Mikey? What are you going to be for Halloween?” 

Mikey looked up to Frank and looked confused. “Is it soon?” 

“Yeah,” Frank said with a little laugh. “That’s why there’s all the orange leaves and pumpkins around. The ghost decorations,” Frank said the last sentence with a playfully spooky voice and tickled under Mikey’s chin. He smiled when the boy giggled and pushed his hand away. “It’s in two days,” Frank said with a smile. 

“Oh, I guess Gerard forgot,” Mikey said with a little shrug. 

“Well didn’t your teacher tell you at school?” Frank asked, now hesitating a little ways away from the group of kids. 

“I’m not going to school,” Mikey said mindlessly before he instantly regretted it. He remembered that he was suppose to say that Gerard was teaching him at home. He didn’t know if Frank would get him in trouble or not. “I mean...Please, don’t say anything!” Mikey instantly squirmed a little in his spot and fussed. He was scared Frank was going to say something to the lady who came to their house sometimes. Dressed in a gray skirt and jacket. She always carried her bag with her and had a shiny pen and a notepad. She made Gerard scared. 

“I...I won’t,” Frank said and looked to Mikey sadly. He would have pried more but he didn’t see the point in upsetting Mikey. He hoped to let it go. “Well, after we play here a little while, we can go pick you out a costume and get ice cream. How’s that sound?” 

Mikey smiled a bit now, forgetting his mistake and instantly thinking of candy and ice cream. He hadn’t been able to go out a lot of Halloweens because of how sick he had been. “Yeah,” he said happily.

“Good,” Frank said with a wide grin. “Now let’s go play tag.”

* * *

Gerard had shown up as promised, without makeup, and he felt so uncomfortable about it. His skin was nearly crawling from the unfamiliar feeling. Jason said he liked it though, better even, and Gerard calmed a bit but he still felt naked without it. 

“I found this place through a friend. It’s a little hole in the wall,” Jason said over their meal. He had ordered for Gerard, wanting him to try a certain plate. Gerard didn’t really care for it but he was eating it because he was starving. He hadn’t been working the last week because he had to wait for his medication to wipe out his chlamydia. It was supposed to be gone now and he needed to get back to work. There was hardly food in the house, so naturally, he hadn’t eaten anything to let Mikey have it. 

He thought back to his doctor telling him he needed to gain weight, that he was going to get sick but he didn’t care. He needed Mikey to stay healthy so he wouldn’t get sick again. 

Gerard glanced around the room and noted that the place with dimly lit. That atmosphere was nice but it wasn’t over the top. He was starting to notice all the places he went with Jason had low lighting and seemed to be a hole in the wall. But the food was always good and Gerard thought that less lighting was romantic and gave them privacy, he liked it. 

This was their fourth date and to his standards, they were doing pretty good. If they could make it to date six than Gerard would break his record of the most dates he’d ever had with the same man. Gerard figured he should put out tonight, Jason had been hinting towards it a little, and Gerard knew, in his mind, that he owed him that. Jason had waited three dates without even hinting about bringing Gerard home, and now he was. 

“You’d love my apartment,” Jason said with a small sip of his wine. “It’s full of art,” he added. Gerard had nearly snorted at the first line since he had heard it so many times but his interest was peaked when he heard art. 

“Really?” He asked and smiled a bit across the table. 

Jason seemed to smirk back and nodded. “I bet you’d love it,” Jason said and sat down his wine glass. “Would you like to see it?” Gerard hesitated for a moment, he didn’t feel up for sex, in all honestly, he felt a little sick but he didn’t want to mess things up. He nodded his head with a forced smile and watched Jason motion to the waiter for the check. He figured he would go and try and if his sickness didn’t stop he would just say something. Jason didn’t seem like the type of guy who would treat Gerard unfairly.

* * *

“The vampire is a solid choice,” Frank said with a giggle as Mikey playfully hissed at him. Mikey was resting in the cart as Frank pushed it. He hadn’t realized how easily Mikey tired and when the boy had collapsed while playing tag Frank had almost had a heart attack. He had only tripped but he was panting hard and his face was red. Frank had gotten him a water and made him sit out a few rounds. He had just imagined having to take Mikey to the hospital and having to call Gerard. 

“What are you going to be?” Mikey asked with a smile as Frank was putting things in the cart for ice cream sundaes. Mikey had admitted to being tired and just wanting to go to Frank’s house after getting the costume. Though, since it was later in the day they figured they would go back to Mikey’s to have them. 

“Maybe a Frankenstein,” Frank said with a smile at Mikey. 

“That’s perfect!” Mikey giggled and then started coughing. Frank worriedly moved closer but then Mikey stopped. “I’m okay,” he said with a small smile. 

Frank sighed in relief before he started bringing the cart towards the register. He didn’t know how Gerard was strong enough to deal with this much worrying. Frank was still so shaken up from Mikey collapsing that everything made him scared that Mikey was hurt or needed a doctor. 

Frank started loading things out of the cart and Mikey handed him the items. “Frank? How old are you?” Mikey asked curiously. 

“Twenty-five,” Frank said with a smile as Mikey handed him the ice cream. 

“I’m ten,” Mikey said as he picked up the sprinkles. 

“Well, I’ll be twenty-six on Halloween,” Frank said as he took the sprinkles. “When’s your birthday?”

“September something,” Mikey said with a shrug. He couldn’t remember the number even though Gerard had told him. He smiled and handed Frank the pumpkin he had picked out, Mikey had been so excited when Frank had let him pick one. 

“Oh, so you just turned ten,” Frank commented as he nodded to the girl ringing up their items. 

“Yeah. Gerard drew me this cool picture. He was going to go to art school,” Mikey said thoughtfully as he watched Frank pay and carefully place the bags in the cart, mindful of Mikey’s legs. 

“He told me,” Frank said with a little smile as he remembered their date. 

“I want to get him a book to draw in for Christmas,” Mikey said quietly. “But I don’t have money,” he shrugged.

“Well, when it’s Christmas I’ll take you shopping for him, how about that?” Frank asked with a smile, already seeing Mikey’s excitement. 

Mikey squirmed excitedly. “Thank you, Frank!” 

“Don’t mention it,” he said before lifting Mikey from the cart to set him down by the car.

* * *

There hadn’t been as much artwork as Gerard had hoped for but then again he had been hoping there would have been enough to keep them busy all night. An hour later and they were seated on Jason’s couch a glass of wine in their hands. Jason’s apartment was certainly an expensive one and the furniture and decor only proved the fact further. 

“You know,” Jason’s voice drew Gerard’s gaze from his glass. “You are really beautiful,” he said, smiling when he saw Gerard blushing. “I almost wish I could turn you into a work of art and have you hang on my wall every day so I could look at you.”

“I wouldn’t go that far,” Gerard said with a shy smile on his lips. 

“I would. I collect beautiful things and you are truly beautiful,” Jason responded when Gerard looked away from him and back to his wine glass. 

Gerard was trying to keep the pink color of his cheeks to stop from going to red. There was something about Jason that made him almost feel special, admired. “Well, if things work out,” Gerard said, pausing to sip his wine, “you might just get to see me everyday.”

Jason smiled at this before he leaned forward and gently pressed his lips to Gerard’s. He only pulled away to set down his glass and to take Gerard’s, also setting it on his expensive coffee table. Gerard bit his lip a little but stopped when Jason turned to him and just forced a shy smile. 

Jason leaned over Gerard, slightly pushing him back to lay against the armrest. “Stop me if I go too far?” He whispered against Gerard’s lips before he kissed him and pressed their bodies together. 

Gerard still didn’t feel too great but he was forcing himself to deal with it for the sake of another date. Jason was proving to be more and more of a perfect match for Gerard’s needs. He had the money, he was sweet, and he seemed caring. Now there was sex, Gerard would have to see how well he did with that. He figured this would have to be something that Jason was bad at since he was so great at everything else but Gerard could deal with it, he just needed someone to care for him and Mikey. 

When Jason’s hands started groping at Gerard’s hips he paused and Gerard didn’t notice at first but then he did, his phone was vibrating in his pocket. 

“Do you need to get that?” Jason asked and Gerard just shook his head. “You didn’t even check it,” Jason said with a small laugh.

“There are more important things,” Gerard purred before he pulled Jason back into him and kissed him. He knew if it was Mikey he would keep calling so he figured he would just wait and see. 

Jason’s mouth moved quickly to Gerard’s mouth and Gerard tried to ignore how good it felt. He was skilled with his mouth that was for sure, he couldn’t deny it. He then felt hands on his belt buckle and tried to just tell himself that he was okay with it.

* * *

“He didn’t answer,” Frank said to Mikey before he went back over to the table in the kitchen where they had the ice cream out. “Is he always so late?” 

Frank had come home with Mikey and they had made their sundaes. Frank had then put everything away and noted how empty the cupboards and freezer was. He had shamelessly glanced into the fridge and seen how empty it was as well. It was now almost eleven at night and Frank just didn’t feel right leaving Mikey alone. 

“He’s probably at Jason’s house,” Mikey said with a little shrug. “Sometimes he doesn’t come home until morning,” Mikey added with no sign of emotion to the matter. 

“Well, let’s get you ready for bed then. It’s late,” Frank said with his hands on his hips. 

“Can I watch one cartoon before bed? Please?” Mikey pouted, giving Frank his best begging face, it always worked on Gerard. 

“Alright, one,” Frank said with a smile before he went over to the couch, letting Mikey lead. They both sat down and Mikey turned on the TV before he wrapped his arms around one of Frank’s and rested his head onto Frank’s shoulder. 

Frank turned his head a little to look down at Mikey and he found a soft smile on his lips. This was nice. Being in Gerard’s house with Mikey nuzzled close to his side was one of the best feelings, he couldn’t deny it. It was nice to have someone to spend time with, to care for. 

Frank grabbed up a blanket that was on the edge of the couch and carefully draped it over Mikey, letting the young boy lay with his head in his lap. “You warm enough?” Frank asked quietly as he could see that Mikey was already growing tired. 

“Yeah,” Mikey hummed contently. “Thank you, Frank.”

“You’re welcome,” Frank said with a soft smile and gently pat at Mikey’s head softly, touching the hat that rested there. 

It wasn’t ten minutes later that Mikey was fast asleep, snoring on Frank’s lap. Frank tried to deny how tired he was but playing outside with Mikey all day and the fact that he had been up early was not helping. Frank had thought about leaving but he didn’t like the idea of leaving Mikey to wake up alone. He told himself he would wait a little longer.

* * *

“J-Jason…,” Gerard whimpered out as the man above him was pressing into him repeatedly. Gerard couldn’t deny it, Jason was good at this. It had only taken him a matter of moments to find Gerard’s spot once he had been inside him and he wasn’t stopping. He had slowly opened Gerard up with his fingers and sucked him off. Gerard had shamefully came inside of Jason’s mouth and apologized repeatedly. Gerard just wasn’t used to being the one getting treated. 

Now Jason was between his legs fucking him to his next orgasm. “Oh God,” Gerard whined and tilted his head back, panting out as he gripped at Jason’s back with his bitten down nails. 

“Yeah, I’m gonna cum,” Jason panted in Gerard’s ear as his thrusts got a little more erratic but still kept driving Gerard crazy. 

“Oh, fuck! Me too, me too,” Gerard fussed and started rolling his hips down into Jason’s thrusts. “Yes, yes, yes,” Gerard chanted and he moaned when he felt Jason’s lips on his neck. 

Then Jason gave him five more hard thrusts and Gerard saw stars when his orgasm hit and Jason came into the condom, buried deep inside of Gerard. They both slumped together and panted harshly as they came down from their intense high. Jason had never heard anyone make noises like Gerard did when he came and he had to admit that it had driven him over the edge. 

Gerard fussed and ran his fingers through Jason’s dark brown hair. He pressed his lips to Jason’s messily and felt the other man kiss him back deeply. 

“You’re one of a kind,” Jason purred against Gerard’s lips, making him smile. 

Gerard nuzzled himself into the blankets and yawned softly. He found a soft smile on his lips when Jason curled up behind him and wrapped an arm around him. He felt content for a moment but then he found himself wondering about Mikey. He wondered how his day had gone. Frank had shown up saying they were going to go on a picnic. Gerard had wanted to go so bad but then he knew they wouldn’t be back in time for his date. Frank had shown up early and everything, he almost looked a little disappointed when Gerard had said that he couldn’t go. 

He nearly wanted to crawl out of bed and get his phone but he figured that Mikey was asleep and Frank had gone home, if he had not gone to bed already. Gerard figured everything was fine and he would just go home tomorrow morning to ask Mikey how his day had been. He nuzzled himself closer to Jason, happy for the close contact and intimacy he so badly craved. 

On the floor next to the bed, Gerard’s phone quietly vibrated again, signifying that someone was calling. Jason could hear it faintly but Gerard made no sign of hearing it. Jason said nothing and only pulled Gerard into him closer, wrapping him up tight in his arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, Gerard is getting some mad feelings. Closeness with another person makes him weak. 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed it!


	19. Chapter 19

“I just, I really need to get home,” Gerard said shyly as he scratched at the back of his head gently. He was in last nights clothes though they were more wrinkled and crumpled now. He figured he should be used to doing the walk of shame by now but he wasn’t. He had woken first and dressed but then Jason had woken up. He had first accused Gerard of trying to sneak out on him but then calmed down after Gerard just assured him he had something at home he needed to attend to. 

“Oh, come on. Stay for breakfast,” Jason said with a small smile as he walked up to Gerard, still naked and kissed him gently, threading his fingers into the younger boys hair. 

“I can’t,” Gerard pouted and hoped it wouldn’t be a problem. 

“What? You got a kid or something?” Jason said with a little snort as he looked to Gerard, waiting for an answer. 

“N-No,” Gerard stuttered out before he just sighed. He figured he could get it out now, at least if Jason got mad, it would save Gerard some of his feelings. “I...I have a little brother,” Gerard said quietly and looked down a little. “He’s had cancer and he’s just getting over it. My parents passed so he’s my responsibility now.” Gerard waited but he didn’t lift his gaze, he was just waiting for Jason to throw him out. 

“Gerard,” Jason said quietly but then paused. “I’d ask why you didn’t tell me but I can understand,” Jason said but when Gerard glanced up there was a small smile on his lips. He softly brushed his fingers through Gerard’s hair and nudged his cheek. “I’ll take you home,” Jason added softly. 

“You’re...You’re not mad?” Gerard questioned as he watched Jason dress. 

“Of course I’m not,” Jason said as he pulled on a shirt. “Why would I be? You having a little brother doesn’t change anything. I still like you,” Jason smiled before he came over, after pulling on his pants. He pressed a soft kiss to Gerard’s lips. “We’ll get some breakfast on the way home.” Gerard smiled wide and kissed Jason back.

* * *

Frank was snoring quietly, curled up with Mikey on the couch when he heard the door open. He was a little groggy at first as he let his surroundings sink in but he protectively pulled Mikey into his chest. He yawned a little and nuzzled into the side of the boy’s head, letting his mind slip back into his subconscious. 

“Who the hell is that?” Jason asked as he looked to Frank laying on the couch with a small boy he guessed was Gerard’s brother; Mikey. 

Jason had brought Gerard home and he didn’t much care for the neighborhood or Gerard’s house but he said nothing. He figured this was why Gerard never wanted him to see his house. It was a trashy little dump of a house. As he was thinking this, he eyed the linoleum in the corner of the kitchen that was cracked and beginning to rip up. 

“Oh,” Gerard said, a little surprised to see Frank still with Mikey. It was at this point that Frank lifted his head from Mikey's and looked over to Gerard and Jason. “Morning,” Gerard said quietly and tried to ignore how much he liked seeing Frank asleep with Mikey on the couch. 

“Morning,” Frank said groggily and slowly got himself up, careful not to wake Mikey.

Gerard looked at Frank in his jeans and gray shirt, his buttoned up plaid shirt a bit wrinkled from sleeping in it. He looked so cute that Gerard had to smile at him, seeing him pet down his messy hair. Gerard wanted to hug him around his middle, he looked so soft and warm. He cleared his throat lightly and pushed the thought away.

“Oh, this must be Jason,” Frank motioned to him. “Nice to meet you, man. I’m Frank.” Frank held out his hand to the other man with a smile and Jason slowly took it.

Jason eyed Frank up and down, seeing the tattoos and he noted that Frank didn’t talk very proper. He figured this kid must be some homeless man who stayed at Gerard’s sometimes. 

“And he is?” Jason asked, dropping Frank’s hand and making no sign of reciprocating Frank’s greeting. 

“Oh, he’s um…,” Gerard glanced to Frank and then back to Jason. He could sense Jason’s displeasure with Frank’s presence. “He’s Mikey’s babysitter,” Gerard blurted out and wanted to bite off his tongue when he saw Frank’s face look a little hurt and confused but the other man said nothing. 

“Ah!” Jason said looking from Gerard to Frank. “Nice to meet you,” Jason said. “I suppose it’s time you were heading home then?” 

“Well, actually I wanted to talk to Gerard about yesterday. When Mikey was playing in the park-,” Frank began, looking to Gerard but Jason was shaking his head and Frank looked to him.

“Couldn’t it wait? It’s so early and Gerard wants me to meet his little brother,” Jason said with a bit of a smile. 

“Uh...yeah,” Frank said only casting Gerard the smallest of glances. “I guess so,” Frank said with a forced smile that showed no actual joy on his features. “Just uh, tell Mikey I said I will see him the next time you need me,” Frank said as grabbed up his jacket from where he’d set it by the door. 

“Here’s a little money for your trouble,” Jason said and handed Frank a few twenties. “Since I kept him from you both all night,” Jason added with a knowing smile. “That enough, _man_?” Jason said, using Frank’s expression. 

“Sweet, dude,” Frank said back sarcastically and did his best not to glare at Jason but he figured if Jason wanted to treat him like an idiot, he would enjoy acting like one. “Later,” Frank said bitterly towards Gerard before he left. 

“Well, you might want to consider getting another sitter,” Jason said with a small hum at the end. “He’s a bit rude.”

“Well, he’s good with Mikey,” Gerard said as he tried not to frown about Frank’s exit. 

“I could pay for you to get one that’s better for Mikey than him,” Jason said, matter of factly. “One that’s not covered in tattoos and probably has a drug problem.”

“We’ve only been on four dates and I couldn’t do that. Mikey loves him,” Gerard tried with a bit of a smile but he hoped that Jason wouldn’t push it. Gerard figured that he would have to call Frank later and apologize to him. 

“Well if you’re certain,” Jason said with a small smile. "So is this him?" Jason asked as he walked over to Mikey's sleeping form. 

"Well I would hope so," Gerard said in a playfully sarcastic tone. He saw Jason frown a bit and looked down with a frown of his own. "Sorry," Gerard said. 

"He looks pretty good for just getting over cancer," Jason commented and Gerard smiled a little proudly. 

"I've done my best for him," Gerard commented quietly. 

"I bet you were a lot of help to him but he must be pretty strong to pull through it. It’s not like you actually fought his cancer with him," Jason said as he looked to Mikey's sleeping form. “You just did what’s expected of you.”

Gerard nodded a little and he hugged himself, he felt a little uncomfortable as Jason was leaning over Mikey, examining him so close. 

"We should let him rest," Gerard tried. "He played outside with Frank at the park the other day. He still gets worn out very easily." 

"I would like to take you both out to dinner. So I can meet him properly. I will call you tonight with the details, around five," Jason said. 

Gerard smiled at Jason sweetly. "I can't wait," he cooed. He walked up to Jason and pressed a kiss to his mouth. 

"Have a good day, babe," Jason said with a small smile before he left.

* * *

Gerard had gotten Mikey breakfast when Jason had stopped at a drive thru to get them something. Jason had paid for it and it kind of made Gerard happy, just knowing that Jason didn’t mind getting something for his little brother; even if it was just breakfast. When it was nine, Gerard decided he should wake Mikey up.

He went over to the couch and laid down behind Mikey, where Frank had been. He smiled a tiny bit as he could still slightly smell Frank on Mikey. “Mikey, babe,” Gerard whispered quietly and kissed the back of Mikey’s head. “Time to wake up,” he purred and smiled when he felt Mikey stir a little. 

Mikey fisted at one of his eyes before he carefully rolled over to face his older brother. He yawned and stretched a little. “Morning, Gee. Where’s Frank?” Mikey asked before he glanced around the room for him. 

“He woke up earlier and had to go home,” Gerard said, only lying a little. He didn’t want to stress Mikey when there probably wouldn’t be a problem. He knew Frank had been a little upset but he figured that it wouldn’t end up being a big deal between them. “Did you both have fun?” 

“We did!” Mikey said with his quiet, sleepy voice all filled with excitement, making Gerard smile. “We went to the park and ate for a little bit but then we just kind of laid together in the grass. It was really nice,” Mikey said with a smile. “Then we talked about Halloween and played tag with the kids at the park! I met one boy, named Eric, and Frank said we could go to the park next Saturday, if it’s okay with you, so I can play with him again. He was really cool.” Mikey rattled off excitedly. 

Gerard took this all in with a smile but then he thought about Halloween and couldn’t believe he hadn’t put that much thought into it. He figured it was mostly because the houses in his neighborhood didn’t decorate or celebrate the holiday, not because they were against it but because they couldn’t afford it and didn’t care. 

“Well, that sounds like fun. No wonder you were all worn out,” Gerard said with a grin at his little brother. 

“I know. I scared, Frank,” Mikey said with a slightly nervous tone as he laid on the couch with his brother. It was nice like this. With the sun shining through the window behind the couch there was a warm light cast over them both and he enjoyed it. 

“Oh? What did you do to poor, Frank?” Gerard asked with a little smile. 

“I had been running too much and laughing. I knew I should have sat down but I didn’t,” Mikey said and he hoped Gerard wouldn’t get upset with him. “I just got real tired all of a sudden and the next thing I knew Frank had me in his arms and he looked really scared,” Mikey said. 

“Mikey we’ve talked about this. When you get tired you can’t overdo it,” Gerard said with a little sigh and pet back Mikey’s short, stray hairs. “But I know you were just excited,” Gerard said and nodded a little. “Was Frank really upset about it?” Gerard was now thinking back to how Frank had said that he wanted to talk about yesterday, with Mikey in the park. He also thought over the two missed calls from him that he had woken up to this morning. 

“He cried a little,” Mikey admitted and he remembered back to it. He had felt really bad seeing Frank that upset. He knew he’d scared the other man horribly. “But he just had me sit in his lap and sip water for a little while. He was going to take me to the hospital but I told him that it happened sometimes and that I would be okay.” 

Gerard sighed a little through his nose, now feeling horrible for not having asked Frank to finish telling him about what had happened. He knew how scary it was when Mikey collapsed, he couldn’t imagine being in Frank’s place with no idea as to what was happening. 

“Well, I got you breakfast. Why don’t you come eat and I’ll call Frank?” Gerard offered and when Mikey nodded he got up with him. Mikey sat down at the table and sipped the orange juice that Gerard had just put out for him before waking him up. “I’ll be right back, babe,” Gerard said before kissing the top of Mikey’s head. 

Gerard walked down the hall to his room and got out his phone. He went to his recent calls and looked to Frank’s name. He hesitated for a moment before he clicked the button to place the call. He listened to it ring and began unbuttoning his shirt, wanting to put on some fresh clothing. 

It was the fifth ring when Frank finally answered the phone and his greeting wasn’t his normally cheery one. It sounded a little distant and cold, put off. 

“Uh, hey,” Gerard said, smiling shyly even through the phone. “I um...I wanted to call you and explain somethings,” Gerard said before he gently bit down on his bottom lip.

“Alright,” Frank said simply and added nothing else to it. 

“I uh...Well, I hadn’t planned on going back to Jason’s last night so I’m sorry I didn’t make it home or answer your calls for one,” Gerard said and paused for Frank to respond. When he didn’t, Gerard continued nervously. “Also, I didn’t mean to call you my sitter. That wasn’t fair of me but…but things are really working out for me with this guy and I don’t want to ruin it,” Gerard said honestly before he chose to bite on his thumbnail instead of his lip. There was still silence. 

“And I....Mikey told me about what happened in the park,” Gerard said quietly and sat himself on the edge of his bed. “Are you okay?” 

There was silence on the line for another moment before a weak sigh. “Gerard, I had just...when he fell I got so fucking scared,” Frank admitted. “I mean, I’m not used to caring for someone and I just…,” Frank stopped, not being able to find the words.

Gerard waited to see if Frank would continue on his own and when he didn’t, Gerard urged him on. “What, Frank?” 

“I’ve...I’ve already gotten so close with him and I just want to know that this Jason guy...That he’s not going to change that,” Frank tried quietly. He knew he didn’t have much of a place to ask this of Gerard but he wanted it. He had no one and Mikey had become such a fast, instant joy to Frank. It was nice to be able to care for someone, to feel needed like Mikey made him feel. 

“He won’t,” Gerard promised with a small, sad smile at how close Frank had already gotten to Mikey. It meant a lot to Gerard to know that Frank was getting as attached to Mikey as Mikey was to Frank. 

“I hope not,” Frank said before he paused. “Him falling at the park…,” Frank said quietly, grabbing back Gerard’s full attention. “I was so worried that something serious was happening. I was scared that I was going to have to call you and tell you that I had hurt him.” 

Gerard frowned at how sad Frank sounded. “Listen, even if it had been something serious, it wouldn’t have been your fault. Mikey being sick is no ones fault and I would not have put that on you. I should have told you how easily he can wear himself out. It was my fault if anything,” Gerard told Frank. 

“Well, all the same, I’m sorry I didn’t make him take it a little easier,” Frank said with a soft sigh. 

“It’s fine, Frank,” Gerard said, finding a content feeling inside him. 

“So, when am I watching Mikey again?” Frank asked, hoping to know when he could. 

“Oh, well,” Gerard said and he leaned a little to make sure Mikey was still at the table down the hall, he was. “Jason actually wants Mikey to come with us, on our next date,” Gerard said before he bit his lip. “He’s going to call me tonight to make the plans,” Gerard said with a frown. 

“But this is good,” Gerard tried when Frank was quiet for a little longer than he would have liked. “He accepted Mikey. He wants to get to know him,” Gerard said. 

“Well, I’m happy for you...that it’s working out,” Frank said and Gerard wondered if the sincerity in his tone made Frank just as nauseous as it did Gerard. 

“Thank you,” Gerard said quietly and looked down. Now when there was a pause, neither had words to say.

“Well,” Frank said eventually, “just let me know. If anything, let me know so I can make plans with Mikey. If that’s okay?” 

“That’s fine,” Gerard said with a little smile. “I’ll talk to him about it too.”

“Alright. Well, let him know I said, ‘hi,’” Frank said with a small smile. 

“I will,” Gerard said with a small smile of his own. 

“Bye Gerard,” Frank piped.

“Bye,” Gerard said before he ended the call and stood up.

Gerard was going over the thoughts in his head as he got himself out of his clothing from last night. He figured he should shower and that it would help him have time to think. He just wasn’t sure about everything and he didn’t know what it was. He figured it would have been harder to get Jason to accept Mikey but things had played out smooth. Jason was going to call him at five and they were all going to go out. Everything was turning out alright.

* * *

“Gerard? Why do you keep checking your phone?” Mikey asked quietly from his spot on the floor. He was sitting with his back against the couch and it seemed like every time he glanced to Gerard he was looking at his phone. 

“Oh, well,” Gerard said before he cleared his throat, trying not to think about how it was six now and Jason still hadn’t called. “My new friend Jason...he was going to call me. We’re going to all go out together soon,” Gerard said with a bit of a smile. “He’s really excited to meet you, Mikes.” 

Gerard wasn’t expecting the face that Mikey gave him. He had been waiting for Mikey to be over the moon but he almost seemed disappointed. “What’s wrong?” Gerard questioned. 

“Well...it’s just,” Mikey looked down a little and played with his bottom lip. He didn’t know if he should voice his true feelings but then he didn’t want to lie to his older brother. “I’d rather go out with Frank.” 

Gerard paused for a moment as he let Mikey’s words sink in. “You can still go out with him. We’re just going to go out with Jason this time together. He wants to get to know you, Mikey. Things are going pretty well between me and him.” 

Mikey tried not to show his disappointment but failed. He didn’t want things to work out with Jason. He wanted them to fail so that his brother would get back with Frank. He liked Frank a lot and didn’t see how Gerard could just like this other guy instead. Mikey had never met Jason but he would bet his stuffed piggy that he wasn’t as fun as Frank was. 

“You should be excited about this,” Gerard said, almost angrily. It seemed like he could never do anything right for his little brother, no matter how hard he tried. He found a good choice for them, a solid choice. Jason had money and was really interested in Gerard, enough so to overlook Mikey. “He wants to take you out and get to know you. You’re lucky he didn’t just leave me like everyone else has because I have to take care of you!” 

It was a moment later that Gerard’s words sunk in and he heard what he had said to his little brother. Mikey didn’t move from his spot on the floor but his head was hung like he should be ashamed. 

“Mikey...I didn’t…,” Gerard rubbed at his eyes and sighed at himself. “Mikey it...that came out wrong.”

Mikey got up from the floor and started walking to his room. “Michael! Don’t walk away from me! We were talking!” Gerard hollered and stood up, pointing to the floor where Mikey had been. He saw his little brother turn to him, his eyes gleaming with tears.

“I wish you had died instead of mom and dad!” Mikey screamed back loudly before he ran to his room and slammed the door. 

Gerard wavered a little in his spot before he hung his own head and his tears were running down his cheeks before he realized he had even begun to cry. He dropped down onto the couch and put his face in his hands. “Me too,” Gerard whispered quietly to himself as his tears fell heavily.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh no....
> 
> -Sorry this is late! I had family problems at home and couldn't really get the time to update. But here it is!


	20. Chapter 20

Gerard dragged himself in through the door as the first light of the day was coming up. He carefully maneuvered the bags in his hands that felt like bricks to the table and started emptying them. He put the items he had bought away and scratched weakly at the back of his neck before he went into the bathroom and turned on the shower. He stuck his hand in and felt the water until it got warm enough for his liking. 

He stripped himself of his jeans and tight shirt, throwing them into the hamper. He rested his hands on either side of the sink as he leaned back a little, stretching the muscles in his back. He kept opening his mouth and closing it, trying to relieve the pain in his aching jaw. He glanced up at himself in the mirror for only a second to see his disheveled hair and messed up makeup from the multiple rough blowjobs. He sighed out before he got himself into the shower and just stood under the spray, trying to block out the world. It helped for a moment until his thought began to kick in. 

He looked down after a moment and figured he had earned another good cry. Jason hadn’t called him and his little brother wished he was dead. It all felt like too much, especially after he had to spend another night out on the streets, selling himself for any cash he could get. 

Frank had came through the alley and Gerard had only ducked away, hidden from him. He hadn’t wanted Frank to see him then because he was so miserable and he worried he would only begin to cry again. He knew Frank would ask him what was wrong or if he was okay and he knew he wouldn’t have been able to bare it. 

He had finished up on the corner at about four in the morning and before going to the store he had stopped at his parents grave. 

__

_Gerard walked through the long dark rows of headstones before he had come across the one with the name Way on it. Upon seeing it he had collapsed onto his knees and let out a sob. He fisted at his hair and just cried as he sat on the soil that covered both of his parents, who lay beneath the earth._

_“Mommy...Daddy…,” he had cried, now laying on his stomach, pressing his cheek against the grass as if it were both of their chests and they would hug him._

_“I can’t do this,” he sobbed. “I try so hard for Mikey and I know he wishes that it was me who had died and even though…,” Gerard sniffled harshly and coughed. “Even though I agree with him it just hurts so bad,” he sobbed._

_“You could have done so much more for him than me,” Gerard cried. “I’m failing him. I lost the house...I lost my car...I can hardly keep the fucking lights on,” he wailed. “I...I…,” he sat himself up a little and looked up to their headstone before the sight made him cry harder and hide his face into the ground again. “I know that I’ve failed you both,” he sniffled and whined._

_“I just...I wish you were here and everything was okay,” he breathed into the earth, down to his parents. “This isn’t fair. Why did you have to leave us?”_

__

Gerard wiped at his burning eyes and slowly reached up turning off the water in the shower. He quickly dried his hair before he wrapped the towel around his waist and went to his room, finding boxers. The sun was up now and his phone told him that it was almost seven in the morning. He just felt so tired.

Gerard crawled onto his bed after he had gotten into his boxers and a tshirt and let himself curl up in his blankets. He closed his eyes, wanting a break from his mind and his thoughts.

* * *

“Sh,” Gerard hissed out mindlessly as a noise was disturbing him. His mind came into consciousness a few moments later and he realized his phone was ringing next to him on his nightstand. He blinked for a second before he instantly thought of Jason and shot up in his bed. 

He grabbed at the phone desperately, almost knocking it onto the floor before he saw that it was in fact Jason. He hurried flipped open his cheap, plastic phone and answered it. 

“Hello?!” He said hurriedly and was disgusted by his groggy sleeping voice. He cleared his throat. “Jason? You there!?”

“Hey. Sorry I didn’t call last night. Things got pretty crazy with work,” Jason said quietly. “Are you?...Were you sleeping?”

“Oh, I…,” Gerard wracked his brain. “I got up really early this morning and I was just resting my eyes a little,” he lied before he pulled the phone from his ear to check the time. His eyes bulged as he saw that it was nearly three in the afternoon. He figured it was because Mikey hadn’t woken him up that he had slept so long. 

“I see,” Jason said with a little smile. “Well, I checked my schedule and I’d love to take you and Mikey out tomorrow night. I’d pick you both up around four?” 

“Y-Yeah,” Gerard said and then found a small, happy smile on his lips. “That sounds perfect.” 

“Alright. Make sure he wears something nice,” Jason added lightly.

“Oh, yeah. Of course,” Gerard said quickly. “He’ll be perfect. I promise,” Gerard said, wanting to make sure that Jason wouldn’t change his mind. 

“I’m sure he will be,” Jason said. “If he’s anything like his brother he’ll be just as perfect as you,” Jason said with a smile. 

Gerard blushed and looked down. “We’ll see you tomorrow,” Gerard said happily. 

“See you then, babe,” Jason said back before he hung up. 

Gerard jumped up and pulled on pants before he went to tell Mikey about their date before he stopped at his door. He didn’t know if Mikey still hated him and he didn’t want to bother him if he did. He bit at his bottom lip before he timidly knocked on the door. 

“Mikey, please let me in? I have something I really need to talk to you about,” Gerard said quietly before letting out a little sigh. “And I’m...I’m really sorry about what I said. It was wrong and I don’t think of you like that. I just...I’m a horrible older brother, I know this but I try,” Gerard whispered. 

There was silence for a few more moments and Gerard sighed out before he opened the door, going into Mikey’s room. He saw Mikey’s empty bed and walked over, slowly crawling onto his knees and looking under the bed but Mikey wasn’t there. He quickly got up and went out into the kitchen and then the living room when he didn’t see his little brother. 

“Mikey!” Gerard nearly sobbed as he ran to check the bathroom but he wasn’t there either. “I...I….Mikey…,” Gerard couldn’t breath, his heart was in his throat. 

He quickly ran outside and looked around. “Mikey!” He hollered and then saw his neighbor out on her porch smoking, she looked over to him. “Have you...Have you seen my little brother?! M-Mikey!” Gerard asked, not bothering to wipe the tears streaming down his cheeks. She shook her head. “Fuck,” Gerard cursed before he went back inside and paced quickly. 

He wanted to call the cops but that could lead to social service and Mikey might just be right nearby and fine. Then if he didn’t call the cops, Mikey could be hurt or dying somewhere, and that would be worse than the state taking him from Gerard. 

Gerard was panicking and crying as he was mumbling to himself in a quick, uneven tone. He didn’t know what he was going to do. Then Frank instantly came to mind and he got his phone, shakily trying to bring up his number. He managed and when he heard the phone ringing he bounced in his place until Frank picked up. 

“Frank! Frank, you have to help me!” Gerard cried out desperately.

Frank didn’t know what was happening but Gerard’s voice instantly had him in a panic and he stood up from his couch and instantly went for his jacket. “I’m on my way to you. What happened?” 

“M-Mikey...we...we got in a fight yesterday...last-last night. He’s...He’s gone. He left,” Gerard was sobbing and hugging himself, now on the couch, he squirmed. 

“I’m in my car. I will keep an eye out for him on the way there. Just...you’re not fit to go looking for him,” Frank said honestly and he quickly dodged a car that had pulled out in front of him. He was honestly speeding and it was his fault so he didn’t bother honking at the person. “I’ll be there soon!” 

Gerard hung up and he felt his arms shaking so he just hugged himself tightly. Gerard tried not to fuss but he found himself whimpering regardless. “He’s okay. He’s okay,” Gerard whispered to himself and closed his eyes. 

It felt like an hour but soon Frank was walking through his front door and Gerard walked up to him. “Thank you,” Gerard cried and wrapped his arms around Frank’s shoulders. “I just didn’t know who else I could call,” he hid his face into Frank’s shoulder and just let himself cry for a moment. 

“It’s going to be okay, Gerard,” Frank said quietly against Gerard’s ear. “Now if he goes out with you around here, where do you take him? Where do you guys go often?”

“I...I don’t know,” Gerard cried. “I mean sometimes we go into town to get something to eat other than that there’s really nowhere else.” 

“What about like...a park or a quiet place? Somewhere he can be alone? If he’s upset that might be where he is,” Frank tried and he was keeping his voice steady, even though he was panicking almost as much as Gerard. 

“I don’t know...I don’t even know how long he’s been gone,” Gerard sobbed. “I’m such a horrible person. We...We fought last night and he went to his room. I left around seven and I didn’t get home til this morning. I was working last night and I went to my parents grave and then the store and I…,” Gerard stopped and looked to Frank. “Frank…,” Gerard said in realization. 

“Let’s go,” Frank said quickly and grabbed Gerard’s hand, heading out to his car with Gerard. He quickly pulled open Gerard’s door for him and went around to his own, getting in. 

Gerard knew the odds were slim but their parents grave was the only place he could think of Mikey going when he felt upset. It was where he had went and he had to admit that Mikey was more like him than either could imagine. He quickly gave Frank directions and shook in the passenger seat. 

Frank quickly pulled up next to the cemetery and waited for Gerard to come around the car before they both headed in. Frank held Gerard’s hands and followed him through the rows until Gerard stopped and let out a sob. Mikey was a few rows down, laying in front of a tombstone. 

“I...I need to talk to him,” Gerard said before he sniffled and wiped at his cheeks. 

“Alright,” Frank said quietly before he took off his jacket. “Put this on. It’s cold,” Frank said and helped Gerard put it on his bare arms. “Go ahead. I’ll wait back for you both,” Frank said softly and gave Gerard a little smile. “It’s going to be okay.” 

“Thank you,” Gerard whispered before he turned and walked down the row slowly. Frank took a few steps back and rested himself back against the wrought iron fence. 

Gerard slowly walked up to Mikey and knelt down in front of him, seeing him resting, he could see that Mikey had tear stains on his pale cheeks. He sighed out a little and just let himself calm for a few more moments before he reached out and brushed his hand over Mikey’s cap. 

Mikey’s eyes slowly came open and he looked up to Gerard for a moment. “I lied,” Mikey whispered with a sad voice and saw Gerard look at him confused but still tenderly pet at his head. “I don’t wish you died instead,” Mikey said before he started to cry again. “I’m sorry, Gee,” Mikey fussed before he wrapped his arms around his older brother. “I love you,” he whispered against Gerard’s ear. 

“I love you too, Mikey and I’m sorry. I didn’t mean what I said. I’m just so happy that I still have you,” Gerard cried and hugged Mikey tightly. 

Mikey nuzzled himself closely to his older brother before he pulled away a little. “Isn’t this Frank’s jacket?” 

“He helped me find you,” Gerard whispered and kissed Mikey’s temple. 

Mikey glanced over Gerard’s shoulder to Frank. He lifted his fingers that were gripping Gerard’s shoulder to wave a little at him. He smiled a tiny bit when Frank waved back. 

“I’m sorry I ran away,” Mikey squeaked. 

“As long as you promise me that you were going to come back,” Gerard whispered and kissed Mikey’s cheek now, so happy that he was here with him again. “And that you’ll never scare me like that again.” 

“I promise. Both,” Mikey said with a little smile before he kissed Gerard’s cheek. “Can we get something to eat? I’m hungry,” Mikey admitted.

Gerard laughed a little and nodded but he sniffled. “Of course we can,” he said before he got up and held onto Mikey’s hand. 

“Hey, Frank,” Mikey said when they got closer, feeling a little embarrassed about all the fuss. . 

“Hey, bud. You okay?” Frank asked, looking down to Mikey. 

“Yeah. I’m sorry I scared you,” Mikey said and kept his gaze down. 

“It’s alright, Mikey. Let’s get some pizza. What do you say?” Frank asked and Mikey smiled and looked up to him now, nodding. “That’s my man,” Frank said with a smile and took Mikey’s other hand. 

Gerard glanced over to Mikey and saw the big smile now on his face and then to Frank with a big smile on his face. Finally, Gerard realized, he had a big smile on his own face.

* * *

Frank was sitting on one side of Mikey while Gerard was on the other as they were in a corner booth. Mikey liked this, he felt warm and safe between Gerard and Frank. 

“So, Mikey, are you going out after we eat?” Frank asked before he sipped his coke. “For halloween?” 

“Oh, I forgot to get you a costume,” Gerard said and frowned.

“Frank got me a vampire costume,” Mikey said as he remembered. Gerard smiled at Frank and mouthed, ‘Thank you.’ Frank nodded a little and smiled at Gerard. 

“So after we eat we can go home and get you dressed up,” Gerard said with a smile. “Then we’ll take you out.” 

“So Frank’s coming?” Mikey asked hopefully. 

Gerard just noticed what he had said and turned to look to Frank. He didn’t mean to sign Frank up to go out with them. He didn’t know if Frank had other plans. 

“If you both would have me, I’d love to,” Frank said with a smile. In all honesty, Frank had been sitting at home alone and with today being his birthday, it had made him feel a bit heavy. He was happy to be with people, especially Gerard and Mikey. 

Mikey smiled wide and so did Gerard before they both went back to eating their pizza. “Oh! Happy Birthday, Frank!” Mikey said excitedly before he wrapped his arms around Frank.

Frank laughed a little and hugged Mikey back. “Thank you, Mikey.” He had honestly hoped that Mikey had forgotten so there wouldn’t be a big deal made but then he realized, it was nice to have someone remember.

“I didn’t know today was your birthday,” Gerard said and pouted. 

“Well, it’s no big deal,” Frank said with a smile. 

“How old are you?” Gerard asked, now realizing that he really didn’t know Frank’s age, he felt like he should. 

“Twenty-six,” Frank said with a little smile at Mikey who was obnoxiously trying to chew off a thick piece of cheese that was dangling from his pizza. 

“I would have never guessed you were eight years older than me,” Gerard said with his eyebrows raised a little. It didn’t bother him, just surprised him. Gerard was used to older men in too many ways. 

“Your brother is trying to say I’m an old man,” Frank whispered to Mikey with a smile, teasing Gerard. 

“Oh, shush! I am not,” Gerard said before he laughed. 

“Let me go pay for this,” Frank said grabbing up the bill. “Maybe they’ll give me the senior discount this time.” He said with a smile before heading over to the register. 

Gerard smiled as Frank walked off, he shook his head and sipped his coke. He felt eyes looking at him and glanced over to see Mikey staring up to him. “What?” Gerard questioned, seeing the slight mischief on his little brother’s features. 

“You like him,” Mikey said with a smile before he took the last bite of his pizza. 

“Mikey,” Gerard scowled a little before sighing out a bit because he couldn’t lie. He looked over to Frank in his ratty jeans, his band tshirt, and jean jacket and he couldn’t deny it. He wanted Frank, more than anything he wanted him. He was good with Mikey and he was sweet and he cared but Gerard had reached a new point. He knew he couldn’t be with Frank because he couldn’t shamefully just use him to take care of himself and Mikey. It was wrong. 

“We’ll talk about this later,” Gerard said with a small smile to his little brother. 

“Alright, let’s go home and get you ready,” Frank said as he came up to the booth. Mikey stood up on the seat and jumped onto Frank, giggling when he swayed and groaned a bit. “It seems I have formed some sort of growth,” Frank said and playfully tried to pull Mikey off him. “Oh well, it’s cute, I can live with it,” Frank said with a smile before he shifted Mikey onto his back. 

Gerard slid out of the booth and smiled a bit when Frank outstretched his hand to help Gerard stand up. “Thank you,” Gerard said with a little smile and Frank hummed in acknowledgement but didn’t let Gerard’s hand go. Gerard smiled as he walked out of the pizza shop with his hand in Frank’s and with Mikey holding onto Frank, riding on his back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aw, schucks! 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed!


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I have apparently been displeasing people with my lack of updates. Let me tell you first that I am very sorry but also, I have been busy. 
> 
> Some people seem to believe that I am 17 years old sitting in my bedroom doing nothing but watching netflix. Well I'll let you know I am in my early twenties and I work at three different jobs. I work a minimum of 50 hours a week and sometimes I work overnight. I also have a family, a messed up situation with my older sister, and my little sister got in a car accident and wrecked her car last week, she is thankfully okay. I am also in a relationship, I hardly have time for the ones I'm closest too so sometimes I don't have time to get online. My company is opening a new building next week for a grand opening and I've been spread very thin. 
> 
> Someone said I promised to update weekly and that I had lied so I'm going to retract the weekly updates. I WILL UPDATE WHEN I CAN. There will no longer be a somewhat set time because I dislike being called a liar and coming back to an inbox of snarky comments. 
> 
> I will keep this going for the people who read this and enjoy it without expecting me to bend over backwards to upload when it's not convenient for me. I was going to start uploading another story I've been writing so I would have three going but the comment has made me realize I shouldn't because it's only going to upset people when they have to wait a week or two every so often for an update. I'm sorry but this has really put a sour taste in my mouth towards this site and uploading.

“So...I have to be honest, you saved me,” Gerard said with a smile as he walked down the sidewalk with Frank. Gerard had put on some makeup to make himself look like a skeleton and Frank had a rubber Frankenstein mask pushed up his face so that he could look at Gerard. “I forgot about Halloween and his costume,’ Gerard said, now frowning a little. 

“Hey, you’ve had a lot on your mind,” Frank said softly and smiled a bit as Mikey excitedly ran to the next house. 

“I can pay you back for the costume,” Gerard offered. He didn’t feel right with Frank paying for things. 

“Not happening,” Frank said with a bit of a smile. “It was a gift for Mikey,” he added and when his hand bumped against Gerard’s again he laced their fingers together. 

Gerard liked it, he couldn’t lie but he worried about leading Frank on, he didn’t want to do that. He figured if it went beyond holding hands then he would stop it, more for Frank than for himself but for right now, he was going to let himself enjoy this. 

“Well all the same, thank you, Frank,” Gerard said quietly and he smiled when Frank looked to him with a content one. 

“Thank you for letting me into your life and Mikey’s,” Frank said and nodded ahead to Mikey who was running towards them. 

“Frank! Frank! I got so much candy!” Mikey giggled loudly and held out his bag, showing Frank and Gerard. 

“I’m totally stealing a snickers when we get home,” Frank said with a laugh as he tried to reach into Mikey’s bag only to by playfully batted away. 

Home? Gerard was looking at Frank who had leaned down a little to better talk to Mikey. Frank had just referred to being at Gerard and Mikey’s as home. Gerard didn’t know how much he should read into it though. He figured he was just paying too close attention to something miniscule and unimportant. Then again, he wondered if he was trying too hard to make it feel like Frank wanted to be with them. 

“Well, I get a twix,” Gerard said and stole one from Mikey’s bag as he playfully held it out of reach of Frank. 

“Hey!” Mikey giggled as Gerard opened the wrapper. “No fair! You’re old! You don’t get candy,” Mikey said before he squealed and hid behind Frank when Gerard playfully swatted at his head. 

“He’s trying to attack me, Frank!” Mikey giggled. “Save me!” Mikey crawled up Frank’s body until he was situated on his back. He yawned and tried to hide it but found his head resting on Frank’s shoulder. 

“I’ve won’t let him get you,” Frank said with a smile before he looked to Gerard with an endearing one as he felt Mikey’s warm breath on his neck. “What do you say we head home?” 

“Okay,” Mikey said before he nuzzled his forehead into the back of Frank’s shoulder, slumping against him. 

“Here, baby,” Gerard said quietly and took Mikey’s heavy bag of candy. 

Frank and Gerard stayed quiet as they walked home but it was comfortable. The night turned out to be a decent temperature for the last day of October in New Jersey and they were grateful for it on the walk home. 

“Is he asleep?” Frank whispered. 

Gerard glanced up from the ground to look at Mikey and he smiled before he nodded. “Yeah, he is,” Gerard said quietly. He saw Mikey’s little cape blowing slightly in the wind. “I can take him if he’s getting heavy,” he offered. 

“Nah. Kid doesn’t weigh a thing,” Frank said with a smile as they continued walking towards Gerard’s. 

“Hopefully I can get those fake blood stains off his chin,” Gerard said mindlessly. “Jason…,” Gerard paused for a moment before he figured it was too late to stop now. “He’s taking us out tomorrow night. It’s going to be somewhere nice.” 

Frank looked down a little as Gerard said this before he smiled a bit for him. “That’s good,” Frank said, looking back up to Gerard. “You deserve someone who can take you to nice places,” he said honestly. Frank knew he had never taken Gerard out anywhere really nice and he wondered if that had been one of the reasons they weren’t together now. It wasn’t that he didn’t think Gerard deserved it, they just made him uncomfortable. But he knew that if it was something Gerard like, then he should be with someone who would take him. Though Frank fully believed now, that if Gerard wanted to go somewhere nice, he would sit through the discomfort for him to be happy. 

Gerard just smiled a bit before he nodded and looked to his little brother again, peacefully resting on Frank’s back. “He’s tuckered out,” Gerard whispered and brushed back a piece of the black hair from Mikey’s wig. 

“He’s done a lot of running around,” Frank said honestly. “It’ll be easier to steal my snickers now,” Frank teased.

Gerard laughed a little but stopped when he heard Mikey’s voice, low and quiet. He turned to see a sleepy smile on Mikey’s face, his eyes still closed. 

“You touch my candy and I’ll break your fingers.” 

Frank laughed and just shook his head. “Alright. Alright, I won’t touch it,” Frank smiled and then shook his head. “Kid is serious about his candy,” Frank whispered, leaning into Gerard.

“I heard that,” Mikey tiredly drawled as Frank walked up the steps onto their porch with him. 

Gerard just smiled as he got out his key and unlocked the door. He quickly opened it so that Frank could come inside with Mikey. 

“I’m gonna set you down, bud, okay?” Frank asked as he squatted a little to lower Mikey down. Mikey nodded and slowly slid off Frank’s back, standing. He swayed for a moment and Frank gently grabbed his arm. “I’ve got you,” he said with a little smile and Mikey smiled back. 

“Thank you for coming with me,” Mikey said sleepily and pressed his cheek into Frank’s chest before he hugged onto him. 

“You’re welcome, Mikey,” Frank said with a bit of a smile as he hugged the small form and gently rubbed over Mikey’s back. “Thank you for letting me come,” Frank added before Mikey slowly pulled away. 

Mikey walked over to Gerard and reached into his bag, pulling out a snickers. “Happy birthday,” Mikey said with a bit of a smile and handed it to Frank. 

Frank smiled like he had just gotten the best gift in the world and Gerard couldn’t stop himself for smiling as well. He thought it was the cutest thing and he was proud of his little brother for being so sweet. 

“Thank you, Mikey. This is the best gift ever,” Frank said before he gave Mikey another hug. 

Mikey smiled and hugged onto Frank before he let go. “Night, Frank,” Mikey whispered before he walked over to Gerard and hugged him too. He leaned up on his tiptoes to kiss Gerard’s cheek. “Night, Gee. I love you.” 

“Night, baby. I love you too,” Gerard whispered before he let his brother go. He watched him heading for his room and smiled. “You’re brushing those teeth, right?” He smiled more as Mikey tiredly swayed himself towards the bathroom door instead. 

“He’s a trip,” Frank said with a smile. 

“He is that,” Gerard smiled, looking back to Frank. Now things felt a little awkward, he didn’t know what to do with Frank now. “If I had known it was your birthday I would have gotten you something,” Gerard said now, trying to make some form of conversation. 

“Ah, don’t worry about it. You let me spend the night with you guys and I got a snickers,” Frank said with a smile. “This is one of my best birthdays ever.” 

Gerard laughed a little at that. “Well, I’d hate to see a bad one,” Gerard said playfully but something told him he should regret it by the look that ghosted Frank’s features for a moment. “I-I’m sorry,” Gerard said and frowned. “Sometimes I don’t know when to shut up.” 

“Don’t worry about it,” Frank said and he shrugged a little with his hands in his pockets. “I too have been known to put my foot in my mouth on occasion,” he added with a smile, making Gerard feel a little more at ease.

“Did you...Did you want something to drink? I think I have some soda?” Gerard offered, feeling a little trapped and unsure of what to say or do at the moment. He started going for the fridge. 

“Nah, I’m alright. I should probably head home. It’s late and I don’t want to keep you up,” Frank said, motioning over his shoulder to the door. 

“Well, if you want,” Gerard said before he hugged himself. Gerard watched Frank head for the door and knew he had to say something else before Frank left him. “Hey, Frank?” Frank turned and looked to Gerard, showing him that he was listening. 

“Thank you,” Gerard cooed quietly as Mikey had just went into his room. “I was in a really scary place today and you...you saved me,” he said honestly. He looked up to Frank, trying to show the sincerity in his stare. 

“Don’t worry about it,” Frank said with a little smile. “I’m just glad that you’re both okay. Don’t ever feel like you can’t call me. I’m here for you,” Frank said quietly. 

Gerard looked up to Frank when he heard the last sentence and he really wanted to kiss him. He wanted to show Frank how much he appreciated him but he forced himself to look down. 

“I...Well…,” Gerard just stopped trying to talk. He didn’t know what to say to Frank or how to respond. Gerard slowly walked up to Frank and timidly hugged him, hoping it was okay but when he felt Frank grip him tightly, he knew it was. 

Gerard hadn’t had someone who cared for him in a long time and the feeling was overwhelming and it was strong. He prayed that Frank wasn’t just saying the words without really meaning them because Gerard would do anything for Frank to mean those words. 

Gerard let his head rest on Frank’s shoulder and he closed his eye when he felt them flare a little from Frank’s tender hands rubbing at his back. He felt like he should give Frank something for treating him like his but then he knew that wasn’t how things were suppose to work. He figured if Frank was really who he said he was he didn’t owe Frank anything and it was a nice feeling. 

Frank was warm and he felt nice pressed close to Gerard. It was nice to be close to someone without it having to lead to something or be at the ending of something. It was nice for someone to show him affection without wishing to receive something in return. Gerard didn’t know how much time he had spent pressed up close to Frank but he knew he was beginning to grow sleepy. 

“Thank you,” Gerard squeaked and gently nuzzled himself into Frank’s shoulder. 

“For what?” Frank asked, turning his head a little to look to Gerard who looked content and had his eyes closed. 

“For you,” Gerard said tiredly, not fully awake enough to grasp what he had said. 

Frank felt a comforting warmth spread throughout his chest from Gerard’s words and his cheeks warmed. “I’m happy I found you,” Frank said quietly, knowing Gerard probably couldn’t hear him. 

Gerard began to sag against him and Frank carefully leaned down to slip his arm under Gerard’s leg. He carefully lifted him and pulled him into his chest, Gerard stirred for a moment and then opened his eyes just a crack, looking into Frank’s with his tired ones. 

“Please don’t hurt me,” Gerard whispered, his eyes watering. Gerard was tired and in his mind Frank was going to bring him into his room and he was going to touch him like every other guy had, use him. They had only gotten close or wanted him for this one thing and he didn’t want Frank to be that way. 

Frank shushed Gerard gently as he brought Gerard down the hall to his room. “No, please? Please? Please?” Gerard whined quietly, pathetically. Mikey stirred a little in his sleep as he heard his brother’s fussing. “Frank, don’t.” Gerard cried as he fisted at Frank’s collar. 

“Hey, you’re okay,” Frank breathed as he gently laid Gerard down and watched the boy squirm a little. “I’m not going to hurt you,” Frank cooed and gently brushed back Gerard’s hair. He leaned down and gently started unlacing Gerard’s boots. 

Gerard made a slightly discontent sound but it wasn’t the normally quick fingers that were trying to rip out his laces and take his boots off. Frank was just slowly easing the laces off his aching feet. He felt his shoes come off and sighed contently now as he nuzzled into his pillow, more asleep than awake at this point. 

Now that Gerard was content with Frank being there he was pulling away. Gerard reached out tiredly and moved his hand around. “Frank? Stay,” Gerard breathed and waited for the warmth to come back to him, he soon felt it. Frank’s hand in his hand. “Don’t leave,” Gerard squeaked. 

“I’m right here,” Frank whispered quietly and laid himself down beside Gerard but stayed on top of the covers. “I’ll stay with you until you’re asleep,” he said quietly and he found his hand gently reaching out and running through Gerard’s hair. 

Gerard hummed contently and pressed his face into Frank’s hand. Frank looked up when he heard barefeet on the hallway floor. Mikey was standing in the doorway, hugging himself. 

“Frank..? I had a bad dream…,” Mikey whispered, looking pretty upset.

“Come here,” Frank whisperer and reached out for Mikey. Mikey quickly came over and wrapped his arms around Frank, laying himself against him. “You’re okay,” Frank whispered and rolled over gently as he pulled up the covers, setting Mikey underneath them and close to his brother. 

Mikey nuzzled close to Gerard but held onto Frank’s hand, holding it to his chest. Frank watched as Gerard instinctively wrapped his arm around Mikey and protectively placed his cheek against Mikey’s, sheltering his face. Gerard’s hand that was against Mikey’s back reached out and gently gripped at Frank’s shirt. Frank smiled softly and rested his hand against the one Gerard had on his chest. 

He watched the two brothers resting in front of him and smiled as one of his hands rested on Gerard’s that was on his chest and the other was being held by Mikey and pressed against the young boys chest. He was connected to the two of them and he felt warm and content. He found his eyes resting and even though he told himself not to fall asleep he did. It was officially one of the best birthdays he had ever had and this was his last thought before losing consciousness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aw, boys. <3
> 
> Hope you enjoyed.


	22. Chapter 22

He had his clothes on, that was the first thought that had came to Gerard’s mind. His eyes weren’t even open yet and here he was, shocked that a man had taken him to bed and he wasn’t waking up sore and naked. Gerard’s eyes slowly came open and he rolled onto his side, seeing if Frank was still in bed with him but he wasn’t, he was alone. 

Gerard’s curiosity got the better of him and he quickly got up before he padded out of his door and down the hall. He saw Mikey seated at the kitchen table eating eggs and bacon, he also had toast. Gerard glanced around the living room and the kitchen for Frank but he wasn’t there.

“Morning,” Gerard said softly and kissed the top of Mikey’s head. “Did you make breakfast?” Gerard asked with an eyebrow raised. 

“Morning,” Mikey hummed with a content smile before he shook his head. “Frank did. He just left, said he had work to do but to tell you he was sorry he didn’t stay til you woke up,” Mikey said with a small shrug. “He made you breakfast though,” Mikey motioned to the microwave. 

Gerard pressed the button to pop open the door on the microwave and sure enough there was a plate for him inside. He smiled a little as he thought of Frank making breakfast for him.

“He also got that,” Mikey said and pointed to the corner of the kitchen and Gerard turned. 

Gerard stared at a brand new coffee pot and his eyes widened a little. He hadn’t gotten anything from someone in a really long time, besides when Frank had gotten him flowers. He smiled as it beeped for the preset time Frank had put in and instantly started perking. The smell of coffee filled the kitchen and Gerard nearly shuddered from how amazing it smelt. 

Gerard smiled and waited contently for the coffee to finish making before he poured himself a cup and sat down across from Mikey. He knew Frank had probably only left a few moments before he’d woken up because his food was still warm. Gerard took a small sip of his coffee and found his eyes closing and he hummed as he breathed in the aroma. He would definitely have to thank Frank a million times. 

“So, Frank stayed the night then,” Gerard said more than asked as he looked across the table to Mikey but he almost felt like he needed verification. 

“Yeah. You asked him too,” Mikey said as he looked up to Gerard. “You were in bed and he was going to leave but you asked him to stay.” Mikey chewed at his eggs for a moment before he spoke again. “I had a bad dream and had woken up so I heard you. I came into bed with you,” Mikey said and frowned a little, he really wanted his dreams to stop being so terrifying. 

“Oh,” Gerard said, confused. Normally Mikey would wake him when he had a bad dream. 

“Frank held me before he laid me next to you. He stayed close to us...I felt like…,” Mikey stopped himself and just looked at his plate. 

“What, Mikey? Gerard asked quietly over his coffee. 

“Like we were safe,” Mikey said and his mouth went crooked. Gerard frowned and looked to Mikey but then gave a small smile. “When I woke up he was holding onto you and I was between you both,” Mikey said and he had a small smile. “Mom and dad used to do that...when I was sick,” Mikey said quietly and looked down to his plate. 

Gerard remained quiet because any time his parents were mentioned he felt a pang of sadness. He knew what Mikey was talking about, he had seen his parents hold Mikey when they feared he was growing too weak. His mother would curl up with Mikey hidden into her chest and their father would lay behind Mikey and wrap his arms around them, holding them close. He looked down at the memory.

“I think mom sent us, Frank,” Mikey said with a voice so quiet it was almost impossible to hear. He didn’t know how Gerard would react to that assumption so he remained quiet after that. 

“That’s…,” Gerard looked across the table to his little brother and knew he had to choose his words carefully. “Frank’s just a nice friend. That’s all,” Gerard said but he kept a soft smile on his lips for Mikey’s sake. “We have to go out with Jason tonight though. Maybe mom sent him to take care of us,” Gerard said, only for Mikey because he knew his mother would have disapproved of Jason. Gerard didn’t know what it was, Jason seemed fine but he had a feeling his mother wouldn’t like him. He knew she would have gotten on perfectly with Frank though. This lead Gerard to think that Mikey’s statement was more likely to be true. 

“Maybe,” Mikey said but his voice didn’t seem very convinced. “I just...I don’t feel very good. Can’t I just stay home?” Mikey asked and looked up to his brother.

“No,” Gerard said firmly, giving his brother a stern stare as he ate his breakfast, it was good. “You’re going to have to wear your nice clothes,” Gerard said, waiting for the groan he knew would come. 

“Ooh!” There it was. “But I hate them! They’re itchy! You said I only had to wear them when the social worker comes,” Mikey protested and crossed his arms across his chest. He hated the clothes and what they represented. He just casted his eyes to the ground and tried not to look at his brother. He didn’t like the idea of going out with Gerard and Jason anyway, he wanted to stay home and have Frank over. 

“Just for tonight. He’s taking us somewhere nice,” Gerard tried as he looked across the table to Mikey and sipped his coffee. He didn’t understand why Mikey was being so stubborn. He just wanted this to work out and for someone to help care for Mikey, Jason could do that. 

Mikey sighed through his nose but he nodded weakly, maybe Jason would be like Frank. “Okay. I’m going to go take a bath,” Mikey said before he got up and headed into the bathroom. 

Gerard sighed a little like Mikey had but let it go. Mikey was at least trying and that was all Gerard could really ask for. Gerard finished his breakfast before he grabbed up Mikey’s dishes with his and washed them. He knew he didn’t have to start getting ready for a little while longer. He figured he could crash on the couch and turn on some cartoons, that might attract Mikey into snuggling with him for a little while. Gerard poured himself another cup of coffee with a fond smile before he went into the living room and sat down on the couch.

* * *

“Hold still!” Gerard ordered as Mikey kept fidgeting. “You’re hair’s all gross from being in your hat all day,” Gerard sighed as he brushed at Mikey’s little hairs. 

“I don’t want to leave my hat,” Mikey said with a frown and tried to grab it from where it was by the sink. 

“Mikey, we’re going to a nice place, you can’t wear it,” Gerard said before sighing and rolling his eyes. 

Mikey bit his lip and just looked down, holding still. He didn’t know who Jason was but he was nervous now. Gerard was making him feel really uncomfortable. Mikey was now wondering what he was going to say or do all night. He didn’t like not wearing his hat though, it made him feel vulnerable. He still had spots on his head where his hair hadn’t grown in properly and it embarrassed him but if Gerard didn’t want him to wear that hat he wouldn’t. 

There was a sudden knock on the door and Mikey felt his heart jump into his throat. He didn’t know what Jason would look like and he had visions of a scary monster on the other side of the door. He’d never met anyone that Gerard had dated before Frank and he figured he was different than the others. 

Gerard quickly rushed out to the door and pulled it open, smiling wide when he saw Jason. “Hey,” he gushed and leaned in, kissing Jason’s cheek. 

“Hey beautiful,” Jason purred and smiled at Gerard before his eyes went past Gerard, looking to the hallway. Gerard turned and saw Mikey standing there nervously. 

“Oh, Jason. This is Mikey. Mikey this is Jason,” Gerard said, having moved so that he was behind Mikey, his hands resting on his shoulders. 

“Hello, Mikey,” Jason said before he walked over to him and held out his hand. Mikey looked at him for a moment a little confused before he put his hand into Jason’s and he felt the man grip his hand. Gerard watched the awkward transaction and he couldn’t help thinking about when Frank had met Mikey. Frank hadn’t even known about Mikey and had done better at easing his little brother’s nerves than Jason did, having known of Mikey. 

“Hello, Jason,” Mikey said quietly and looked down. He then remembered the thin patch of hair on the back of his head and looked up again. 

“He should really wear a hat if his hair hasn’t grown in properly,” Jason said and Mikey looked down again. Gerard frowned and found himself glaring at Jason as Mikey looked like he was going to break down. 

“You said we were going somewhere nice,” Gerard said firmly. 

“Well we can go somewhere else,” Jason said just as firmly back to Gerard. 

Mikey thought he was ruining his brothers date with his new boyfriend and his eyes watered. “Gerard, I’m sorry I don’t have hair; it’s going to grow back,” Mikey tried as he looked up to his brother. “It’ll grow back,” Mikey cried as he looked to Jason now. 

Gerard frowned and his own eyes flared at how upset Mikey was now. “I think you should go,” Gerard said as he looked to Jason. “Mikey, baby it’s okay. Go to your room,” Gerard said quietly when Jason hadn’t left. Mikey only hung his head and slowly walked to his bedroom door before going in and closing it. 

“What the fuck were you thinking?!” Gerard hissed angrily at Jason. “You have upset him. Now he’s going to hate you and to be honest I’m not very fond of you right now either,” Gerard snapped. 

“I was just saying it would probably make him more comfortable,” Jason defended, holding out his hands innocently. “He looked uncomfortable. I just figured he’d feel better not having to be all dressed up,” Jason tried and frowned. “Gerard, I’m sorry.” 

“Like he shouldn’t be able to go somewhere nice because his lack of hair might bother someone! He had fucking cancer,” Gerard said angrily and he was turned away from Jason now, frowning.

“I know but I wanted him to be comfortable. I-I’m sorry. I’m just...I was so nervous that I wasn’t going to make a good impression and now I’ve messed it up. I know how much he means to you and I just wanted him to like me,” Jason said sadly and looked down. “I worded everything wrong. I’m an idiot,” Jason said sadly and turned a little. “I’ll go. I understand,” Jason said miserably before he took a step towards the door. 

Gerard wanted to stay mad but he figured he needed to give Jason the benefit of the doubt. He turned but still had his arms crossed. “Wait,” he said and he wanted to bite his tongue off but he refrained. “It’s just…,” Gerard walked closer to Jason and whispered instead, not wanting Mikey to hear. “You need to be careful with him, he’s very impressionable and he has a hard time being around people. Just be nice to him,” Gerard breathed. 

“I’m sorry,” Jason said and nodded. “I’ll do better. I swear,” Jason whispered and glanced to Mikey’s door. “I don’t want to lose you,” Jason said with a coy smile. “I just got you,” he said a little bashfully. 

Gerard blushed a little and looked down shyly with a small smile. “I’ll go get him.” Gerard said a moment later before he went to Mikey’s room.

* * *

Mikey had taken a lot of coaxing but he had finally agreed to leave his room. They were now all seated in a nice restaurant with their drinks. Mikey was doing his best not to talk or do anything wrong. Mikey wasn’t really paying attention to his brother or the Jason. They were talking about something, he wasn’t sure. He heard words like ‘stocks’ and something about the market but it meant nothing to him. 

Mikey glanced around the room boredly and yawned a little, covering his mouth. It was then that he thought he saw someone familiar and he did, there was Frank. He was halfway across the room, sitting across from some girl.

“Gerard! Gerard!” Mikey said and pulled on his brother’s arm.

“Mikey, you’re interrupting,” Gerard said with a small smile and a sympathetic glance to Jason. “What is it?

“It’s Frank!” Mikey said and pointed to him before he looked again. “Can I go say, hi?” Mikey asked and he looked back to his brother and saw Gerard’s expression almost looked angry as he looked to Frank. 

“No, he’s eating,” Gerard said quietly but firmly.

“Gerard, please?” Mikey asked with a frown but Gerard only shook his head. Mikey frowned and slumped in his chair before the waiter placed their food in front of them. Mikey made a face at it, Jason had ordered it for him. 

Gerard did his best to bring his attention back to Jason and his food but his eyes kept sweeping over to Frank. It didn’t matter how much he told himself not to, his eyes strayed. Frank was sitting at the table with a brunette and she was dressed in this really pretty black dress with her hair done up. Gerard wanted to go over and ask Frank what he was playing at but he knew there was no way that Frank could have known that they would be at this restaurant. Also, Gerard knew he had no place to ask with his own date sitting across from him. 

“Gerard?” Mikey asked a few moments later. “I don’t like it,” he said and glanced to his plate shyly. “It tastes funny.” Gerard had figured Mikey wouldn’t care for the plate to begin with. He knew that Mikey didn’t like dishes with pasta beyond spaghetti and meatballs but he had let Jason order it. 

“It’s fine. Just eat,” Gerard said and forced a small, begging smile towards his brother. He saw Mikey frown a bit but go back to picking at his food a little, he looked displeased. 

Jason looked over to Mikey and saw his face and smiled a little bit. He leaned over to him and nudged him gently. “Do you want to get out of here and go get some burgers and shakes?” 

Mikey looked up to Jason and he found a bit of a smile on his lips before he nodded quickly. “Please?” Jason laughed a little and nodded before he motioned for the waiter and then asked for the bill. 

“I-I’m sorry,” Gerard fussed, trying to make things better in case they were wrong. 

“Don’t worry about it. I used to hate this stuff when I was his age too,” Jason said with a soft smile. 

Gerard smiled fondly at Jason, he was so great it made Gerard dizzy. He leaned over and pressed a gentle kiss to the corner of Jason’s mouth. Jason smirked back over to him and held his hand under the table as they waited for their bill.

Once the food was paid for and they were on their way out Gerard shot one last glance at Frank but he didn’t let it bother him. Jason’s arm was around him and Gerard had his hand resting on Mikey’s shoulder. He had what he needed, he just needed it to work out.

* * *

“F-Fucking...h-hell,” Gerard fussed as he was on his knees, propped up on his elbows with Jason behind him, gripping his hips. Jason was rubbing over his prostate and Gerard’s eyes rolled back into his head and he let out a heated moan. 

“Fuck,” Jason panted into Gerard’s ear, rolling his hips harder as he grinded into Gerard’s ass. Gerard was tight and his body was warm under Jason’s hands. “You’re so gorgeous,” Jason babbled before he leaned his forehead down between Gerard’s shoulder blades and mouthed at Gerard’s skin there. 

“Oh,” Gerard whimpered and closed his eyes tightly. His mind was all a haze as Jason’s cock was pressed into him tight. He couldn’t think of anything but his ass taking Jason’s cock. He was panting loudly and listening to his bed squeaking from Jason’s thrusts that were growing faster. 

Mikey had gone to bed a few hours ago so he knew they were safe to make a little noise. He wouldn’t wake up and come in on them. 

Gerard reached a hand back and fisted it into Jason’s hair. He had his arm fully extended to hold himself up and he cried out as Jason delivered a perfect thrust to his prostate. “Ugh! Fuck!” Gerard huffed and kept his hand in Jason’s hair. “Fuck me!” 

Jason moaned and mouthed at the side of Gerard’s neck. “You sound so hot, baby,” Jason mumbled into his ear and continued to thrust in the same motion that had made Gerard call out, bringing the boy beneath him to pieces. 

Gerard felt one of Jason’s hand tightly gripping his hip and the side of his ass, pulling him apart a little. Gerard collapsed when his arm gave out and pressed his face into the pillows as he keened for Jason to make him cum. He felt Jason’s other hand grip his shoulder to press him down into his thrusts. 

Gerard was babbling, that was the only word for it, he was punch drunk and losing it. He wanted to reach down and fist at his cock but Jason grabbed his hands before he could and pinned them above his head. 

Gerard was beautiful like this. His back was tense and taunt. It was perfectly arched, perking his little ass up for Jason and he had to moan as he watched Gerard’s ass swallow his cock repeatedly. Gerard sounded like he was nearly sobbing and Jason could pretty much see Gerard’s red, throbbing cock without it even being in view. 

“You’re going to come from _this_ ,” Jason moaned and delivered Gerard a deadly thrust to his prostate.

Gerard arched and cried out with his arms still pinned above his head. He felt his cock leaking and shooting between his legs, smearing on the sheets and his stomach. “Jason! Ah!” Gerard nearly shrieked and his body shook as he was orgasming without his cock being touched, he’d never experienced this and it was too much. “Oh, fuck,” Gerard whined pathetically as Jason still thrusted. “It’s so much,” Gerard babbled. “Yes! Yes!” He sobbed and his feet kicked at the bed on either side of Jason’s hips as he felt like he was going to explode.

“Fuck!” Jason nearly shouted and then moaned out loud and breathy as he thrusted a bit more and came. “Jesus,” Jason gasped before he released Gerard’s wrist and saw how red they were from his tight grip. He slowly leaned forward and kissed at Gerard’s wrists. Gerard whimpered when Jason’s cock slipped from his used hole. 

Gerard laid completely still, he was about to pass out right there. He felt his body moving and he peeked his eyes open to see Jason pulling him onto his chest. He’d removed his condom and cleaned himself. He gently cleaned off Gerard’s stomach and covered them before sighing out contently. 

“You’re amazing,” Jason breathed and rested his eyes. He smiled when he felt Gerard nuzzle closer to him. 

“I’ve never been fucked like that,” Gerard said and giggled tiredly, sounding dazed. 

“I’ve never _fucked_ anyway like that,” Jason laughed a little before he gently brushed back Gerard’s hair. He sighed out contently as he glanced around Gerard’s room. It was quite a beaten up home and when he glanced to the cracked mirror on the vanity he pulled Gerard closer and kissed his forehead.


	23. Chapter 23

Mikey was sitting on the couch and watching his cartoons with a bored expression. It had been two weeks since he had went out on the date with Jason and Gerard and they had gone out a few more times. Mikey had lied and said he was sick the last time so he wouldn’t have to go, he didn’t like Jason. He had asked Gerard to call Frank to come get him but Gerard argued that if Mikey was too sick to got out with him and eat with Jason, he was too sick to see Frank. Mikey should have seen that one coming. 

“Gerard?” Mikey asked, seeing his brother sitting at the table. He was going through bills and his hair was standing up in every direction, like it normally was when he had all the envelopes and papers out in front of him. “Can I call Frank?” Mikey asked quietly.

Gerard looked up to Mikey before he looked back down and he didn’t answer. If he was being completely honest, he was ignoring Frank. He felt childish for doing so but he was hurt that Frank had gone out with someone else, not that he was in the wrong for doing so. Gerard had sort of believed they had some secret understanding but he knew now that they hadn’t. Then again, who was he to hope that Frank would just wait around for them to possibly go out again. Even if they did end up going back out, there was no guarantees that their relationship would even last.

Frank had called him a handful of times and now it had been about four days since Frank had attempted to call him. There was three voicemails on his phone that he hadn’t bothered to listen to. Gerard remembered Frank asking him to still let him see Mikey, no matter the outcome of Gerard’s relationship with Jason and he knew he wasn’t upholding his promise. 

“Gerard?” Mikey questioned when his brother didn’t respond to him, seeming to daze off. 

“Oh, um...Maybe later,” Gerard said quietly before he sipped his coffee and looked back down to his bills. He had been out all night, the last two nights, and figured he would have to go out again tonight. 

“That’s what you always say,” Mikey sighed before he laid back down on the couch and looked to the television, crossing his arms over his chest. 

“You have an appointment next week,” Gerard mindlessly reminded Mikey as he picked up one of the bills he had been looking at. 

“Yeah, whatever,” Mikey mumbled as he continued to stare at the cartoons playing on the screen of their small television. 

“Hey! Don’t give me an attitude,” Gerard harped as he looked to his little brother. “I don’t know what your problem has been the last week or so but you need to fix it,” Gerard stated as he dropped the bill and gave Mikey his full attention.

“Fine!” Mikey said and stood from the couch, going over to stand in front of Gerard, across the table. “I hate Jason! He’s stupid and dumb!” Mikey said and pointed towards the door like Jason was standing there. 

“Well that was a little redundant,” Gerard said with a sigh, looking to the stack of bills in front of him, beckoning to be paid. 

“Ever since we went on that date with him you won’t let Frank come over anymore,” Mikey stated angrily and glared at his brother. “You’re just jealous because Frank doesn’t like you as much as he likes me!” Mikey shot at his brother and crossed his arms over his chest. 

Gerard looked up to his brother at this and squinted his eyes a little before he rubbed at them. “Mikey, that’s not true. I’m glad that Frank likes you, I am, it’s just... Jason is my boyfriend and he wants to get to know you. You have to get to know him because we’ve already been talking about moving in together,” Gerard said the last sentence slowly. He had wanted to wait a little longer before discussing this with Mikey. 

He had been going out with Jason for almost a month now and they were already discussing moving in together. Gerard could have never imagined things working out so perfectly. Jason had told him that he was worried about Gerard living in that neighborhood and that it wasn’t safe for Mikey. Gerard thought that it was sweet that he cared so much already. No, Jason wasn’t amazing with Mikey but he tried and he had already mentioned taking care of Mikey. Gerard had mentioned his _escort_ work life and how that might intervene. Jason had told Gerard that he could get done and they would figure something else out. Gerard was excited, especially since he had spent the last two nights in dirty motel rooms and cars fucking strange men. 

“I don’t want to live with him! I like our house here!” Mikey said with his eyes wide. He couldn’t believe his older brother was going to move him away to go live with Jason of all people, it wasn’t fair. “I don’t like him!” Mikey huffed and then frowned. 

“Well, you’re going to have to like him because I can’t afford all of this!” Gerard said a bit louder than intended as he held up the stack of bills. “I’m still fucking paying off your chemo and blood work from last year. We’re…,” Gerard slumped back at this as his eyes watered and he just shook his head and looked down. “Fuck,” Gerard weakly whimpered before he rested his elbows on the table and rubbed at his leaking eyes. He hated to cry in front of Mikey and to let him know they were hardly getting by, Mikey didn’t need the worry. “I’m sorry,” Gerard squeaked through his hands that still covered his face. 

Mikey frowned as he looked to his older brother. He hated to see him cry and he hated to see him so worked up like this. He slowly walked around the table and wrapped his arms around Gerard before he rested his cheek against the top of his older brothers. Gerard only cried harder as Mikey comforted him. 

“I love you,” Mikey said quietly and nuzzled into Gerard’s soft hair. “I’m...I’m sorry, Gee. I...I promise, I’ll like him. I will,” Mikey tried before he pulled away a little and looked to Gerard. “It’ll be nice...to live with him. I’ll see you more,” Mikey said with a small smile. He was trying to make the best of the situation. He didn’t want to live with Jason and he didn’t want to leave their house but if he could see Gerard more and make his older brother happy, he would do it without complaint. 

Gerard took a few moments to pull himself together and wiped at his nose before he looked to Mikey. “I’ll be home with you everyday. We’ll get you back in school, everything is going to work out,” Gerard whispered before he hugged his little brother, he hoped that everything he said would be true.

* * *

Gerard was standing on the corner, bouncing in place because of the cold wind that was blowing. It was the beginning of the third week of November now and the weather was showing. Mother Nature was being pretty cruel Gerard thought. The wind was blowing, it was supposed to start snowing soon, and Gerard felt a little numb after only an hour. He had rode a guy in his car already and had given another a quick handjob but he didn’t have enough money to leave yet. 

Gerard pulled the collar up on his tight jacket, trying to block the wind from blowing against his neck and freezing ears. With his hands stuffed in his pockets, the tips numb, he looked for any oncoming vehicles. He needed to see them before they saw him because his current stance was not an alluring one. 

Gerard saw someone walk up beside him and turned a little in his spot, expecting Crystal but it was Frank and Gerard suddenly felt like he couldn’t breath. He looked down to his feet that kept him standing in his spot on the sidewalk and couldn’t quite understand why they weren’t running away from Frank. 

“You haven’t answered my calls...,” Frank said and the sadness and defeat in Frank’s voice made Gerard flinch a little. “Did I...Did I do something wrong? By...By staying that night?” Frank asked before he looked up to Gerard and there was a frown resting on his features. 

Gerard wanted to talk but he didn’t know what to say. Frank hadn’t done anything wrong by staying but it felt like he had. If Frank had left Gerard could have felt like things weren’t so perfect when Frank was around. Mikey loved Frank and Gerard had been starting to and that was the whole problem.

“You’re...You’re not right for me and Mikey. You just...You shouldn’t come around anymore,” Gerard said, trying to sound firm but it came off a little quieter than he had intended. He had sounded meek and unsure and it didn’t help that he couldn’t bring himself to look Frank in the face when he said it. 

“Not right? Wait, wait, wait,” Frank said and moved his bag onto his other shoulder, coming to stand in front of Gerard now. “What are you even saying? I have done nothing wrong and if I have I want you to tell me. Did I...Did I overstep when I stayed the night? Did I...,” Frank looked down and frowned a bit at just the thought of what he was going to say. “Did I hurt you?” 

Gerard made the mistake of glancing to Frank’s face and seeing the worry and sadness mixed in with so much sincerity was eating him up inside. He frowned and shook his head before he looked down but he didn’t speak because he couldn’t. He didn’t know how to tell Frank that he was trying to pull away. He was falling for Frank and it was only going to ruin everything. Jason was planning on taking care of him and Mikey, he couldn’t jeopardize that. 

“Gerard, please? I just need to know what I did. It’s not fair to me for you to do this,” Frank said, a little upset that Gerard seemed to be sidestepping him. “Did...Is this Jason or something? Does he not want me coming around you anymore or something?” 

“No!” Gerard shot back and groaned, rolling his eyes. “What is it that you get from seeing me and Mikey, huh? Why do you keep coming around? Why do you want to take him out so much?! Are you some sick freak who gets off on kids?!” Gerard shouted just trying to make the situation go away. He knew he was going about it wrong but he didn’t know what else he could do. Frank wasn’t going to drop it and it was better if he just went away for good. If he disappeared, Gerard felt, that the world would right itself. 

Frank took a small step back, like Gerard’s words had physically pushed him away, which only made Gerard wondered how badly the push had been emotionally. Frank look down a bit and Gerard swore he’d seen his eyes flare up a little. Frank cleared his throat and rubbed his eyes before he looked up to Gerard. There was sadness in his eyes mixed with hurt and anger and hints of betrayal. Gerard frowned a little as Frank took another step back. 

“Frank I...,” Gerard tried but Frank held up his hand and shook his head. 

“You’re full of shit!” Frank snapped and it made Gerard step back now. “I help...I help you and you want to act like I’m some pedophile or something?”

Gerard’s anger boiled inside him from Frank yelling at him and he found himself stepping forward again. “Help me how?! By staying the night and pressing up against my little brother!” Gerard was drawing the attention of a few of the other hookers on the street now with his loud voice. 

“I stayed because you asked me to! He had a bad dream and came into the bed! I didn’t do anything to him,” Frank said back, his voice lower than Gerard’s and he seemed eerily calm for someone being screamed at. 

“Well it doesn’t matter because you’re not going to be seeing us anymore! I’m moving in with Jason and he’s going to take care of us and-and everything is going to be perfect! We don’t need you anymore! You were just a backup plan incase things fell through! That’s all you were! Wake up and realize I used you,” Gerard screamed and everyone was now watching the two of them. 

Frank looked hurt for a second and he looked down but then he looked up at Gerard and just stared. Gerard was waiting to be punched or harmed in some way, he figured he had gone too far. 

“You can’t lie to me,” Frank said and he stepped up closer to Gerard who backed up a little. He was worried Frank was only going to try to hit him. 

“I’m not lying,” Gerard said, forcing his voice not to waver. 

“That night...when you reached out to me and you asked me to stay... You were hardly awake enough to even know what was happening but you wanted me there! Because you’re scared and you don’t want to be alone! You’ve been through so much and you’re just hurt and you're lost and confused,” Frank said sympathetically. “You’ve been raising Mikey and doing everything you can to take care of him. I know…,” Frank looked down a little and it was now that Gerard realized his eyes were watering. 

“I know that you’re not sure what you’re feeling and that sucks so bad,” Frank said and frowned a bit. “But don’t push me away. Even if you’re going to be with Jason, I can be here for you, for Mikey. I would never do anything to ruin your relationship with Jason or to jeopardize it. I just... I can’t lose you and Mikey now. You’re all that I’ve got,” Frank said quietly as he looked to Gerard with a crooked frown. 

Gerard found a sob escaped him and he brought his hands to his face, he’d been crying too much today. Frank was too good of a person and it made him hate himself. How could someone be so kind to him when he was so cruel? Gerard shook his head and just looked down. 

“I’m sorry,” he groaned and continued to look down. “I...I…,” but he couldn’t say anything, he didn’t know what to say. He found himself at a loss for words around Frank more than anyone else. 

“Gerard,” Frank said softly and gently touched Gerard’s arm so he’d look to him but he didn’t. “It’s okay to be scared sometimes,” Frank whispered as he gently grabbed Gerard’s hand and held it in his. 

Gerard cried and found himself wrapping his arms around Frank, burying his face into his shoulder, and it felt so good when Frank hugged him back. “I’m so fucking sorry,” Gerard sobbed and he squirmed in Frank’s grip, feeling so foul. 

“It’s okay,” Frank whispered and kissed the side of Gerard’s head as he rubbed his back. “Just don’t push me away,” Frank whispered into the soft strands of Gerard’s hair. 

Gerard closed his eyes and nuzzled closer to Frank, gripping the man's jacket like he might disappear. “I won’t,” Gerard squeaked and then cried as he buried himself into Frank. He couldn’t believe himself for saying it. He had such a hard time trusting people, letting them in. It was as if Frank had a special way of wiggling into his heart and he felt himself warm in Frank’s grip. 

“Good,” Frank said and found a small smile on his lips as he continued to rub at Gerard’s back gently. 

"I didn't mean anything I said," Gerard said before he sniffled and found himself relaxing into Frank. 

"I know," Frank said and he hugged Gerard tighter. He was glad that things were okay between them and that Gerard had in fact only been trying to push him away because he couldn't bare the thought of Gerard actually thinking he would hurt Mikey. 

Gerard couldn't believe that Frank had seen through him and known that he didn't mean any of the words he said but then, Gerard was grateful. Gerard was just unsure in their relationship and he found it hard to trust. With Frank asking nothing of him and Mikey he figured there had to be some underlying cause. Something Frank was getting without Gerard's knowledge. But Gerard was realizing, Frank was proving himself through and through.

It was now that Gerard realized the problem, he was beginning to fall in love with Frank but it wasn’t right. Gerard wanted Frank so bad it hurt him to be so close to the other male and know they were nothing but friends and that’s all they could be. Gerard had promised himself and Mikey that he would take care of his little brother’s needs first and that meant giving up Frank. Jason was stable, he had money, he was a decent guy and he wanted to move Gerard and Mikey in with him in only another week or two. It was best if Gerard just let Frank go but how could he when he had never experienced a love like this in his whole life. Frank made Gerard feel like he mattered and was worth something and Gerard couldn’t let that go but he couldn’t emerge himself in the glorious being that Frank was. 

“Are you going to be okay?” Frank asked softly as he continued to rub Gerard’s back. 

Gerard nodded but he didn’t want to pull away. He wanted to stay with his face in the crook of Frank’s neck where his scent was the strongest and just have Frank continue to shield him from everything. Gerard had never been in love before, this was the first time, and he knew he couldn’t have Frank, it ate away at him. So he would shamefully linger in Frank’s arms for another few moments before he pulled away. 

“There we go,” Frank said with a gentle smile before he brushed Gerard’s cheek with his fabric covered fingers. “Here,” he said quietly and handed Gerard a tissue he had in a packet in his bag. 

Gerard nodded his thanks and blew his nose before he wiped it. Frank could see how shaky and red Gerard’s fingers were and he pulled off his own gloves before he held them out to Gerard. 

“Oh, no. That’s okay,” Gerard said, gently pushing the gloves away but it didn’t help. Gerard’s fingers were like ice against Frank’s warm hand and it only made Frank push the gloves towards him again. “Are you sure?” Gerard asked worried, nibbling at his bottom lip.

Frank nodded his head and put them into Gerard’s hands. “You have to keep warm. You’ll get sick,” Frank said as he watched Gerard nearly moan when he pulled on the warm gloves. “Don’t need you fainting on me again, huh?” Frank smiled a bit more before he stepped back. “I uh…I have to finish my rounds but...if I come back...will you be here?” Frank asked, seeming hopeful.

Gerard nodded a little bit. “I still have to make a bit more,” Gerard said quietly as he glanced for more cars. 

“Well, if you get cold, you go home, okay? Or even if you make your money,” Frank said.

“Are you...Are you coming back?” Gerard asked shyly as his hair blew a little with the cold wind. 

“Yeah. I’ll walk you home,” Frank said before he checked his watch. “Like an hour?” 

“Sounds good,” Gerard said with a little smile and Frank returned it before he stepped off the sidewalk to cross the street. 

Gerard smiled and watched him go, it didn’t matter if he was freezing, he would wait.

* * *

Gerard was in the backseat of a man’s care, straddling him and mouthing at his neck. They were both still fully clothed and for good reason, Gerard pulled away from the man a little. “You got the money?” Gerard asked and held out his hand to the man who was panting a little. 

“Yeah. I’ll give it to you when we’re done,” the man mumbled as he began mouthing at Gerard’s neck. 

“No. I get paid upfront I told you,” Gerard said with a small sigh. 

“It’s alright. I’m good for it,” the man breathed and gripped Gerard’s hips, rolling them

Gerard was flustered and pulled away. “If you’re not going to pay me I’m getting out,” Gerard said and tried to pull away from the man to sit beside him but was harshly grabbed. “Stop it!” Gerard said as he was a bit panicked. The guy started pushing him down against the seat and getting on top of him. 

“No! I said, ‘stop!’” Gerard whined but threw his fist and luckily connected with the man’s jaw. The man backed off for a second and grabbed his face. Gerard took his moment and pulled on the door handle with his shaking hands. The door opened and he awkwardly twisted, trying to get his hands on the ground to crawl out. The cold cement met his fingers and he tried to grasp at anything to pull himself out from under the man that was laying on him.

“You bitch!” The man screamed and grabbed Gerard by his hair.

“Help!” Gerard screamed before the door was slammed again and the man punched him.

* * *

Frank was pacing a little in his spot. He had come back now that it had been an hour and wondered if Gerard was going to come back. He didn’t know if Gerard had just went home or had left with a customer but he didn’t want to leave and have Gerard come back. After a little while he sat down, leaning his back against the brick wall of one of the buildings. 

Frank glanced to his watch and saw that it had been two hours since the two had parted. He figured that Gerard must have gone home but he wanted to be sure. He waited for another half an hour and when Gerard didn’t return Frank went to his car a couple of blocks over and started driving to Gerard’s house.

* * *

“Try getting away from me,” Gerard heard the man mumble against his ear. Gerard had his eyes nearly closed because every time he opened them, everything span. 

The man had Gerard’s pants pushed down to his knees and was roughly thrusting into him. Gerard could hardly comprehend what was happening as he was pushed harshly into the old cushions of the beat up car seat. He knew there was blood coming from his head because it was running down his cheek and some had gotten into his mouth. 

“M-Mikey…,” Gerard whimper pathetically as his vision was darkening. Everything was going away and his fingers weakly dug into the fabric of the seat as he tried to hold on. He was losing consciousness and the pain he was feeling scared him. He couldn’t die, he wasn’t ready, things were going to be okay now. How could this be it?

“Frank..?” Gerard quietly whispered as his mind was somewhere else now. He was back in his bed and there was Mikey, pressed close to him, and Frank holding them both close. This felt okay, it felt nice. 

The man cursed before he pulled out of Gerard with a groan. The man had used a condom, luckily for Gerard but not because he thought the prostitute may go to the police but because he didn’t want to risk catching something himself. 

The man put himself away and then looked over to the younger boy who was bunched up over the middle seat, his head and shoulders resting on the seat next to it. Gerard’s neck was awkwardly craned in this position and his throbbing head had been pressed into the door repeatedly. 

“Hey! Hey, wake up!” The man hollered as he shoved the hooker roughly. The younger boy remained limp and simply fell to his side, unmoving. “Shit,” the man breathed and reached over, his fingers fumbling around for a pulse. He couldn’t find one but he’d never really been good at checking to begin with. He felt around Gerard’s neck, sure he’d feel at thrumming against his fingers but there wasn’t one. Fuck, he had just killed this kid. 

“Okay, okay,” the man breathed out hurriedly before he got out of the car. He went around to the other door and when he opened it, he realized the problem. Blood had poured from the prostitutes head and down the side of his seat. The man swore, knowing he would have to bleach the blood out. 

“Fuck it,” the man said as he reached in and pulled the younger male out of the vehicle, holding under his arms. He didn’t bother fixing the kids pants, he just left them down as he dragged him down the alley. The man groaned as he hoisted the heavy body up and dragged him further, looking for a place to hide him. 

The end of the alley was littered in trash and this looked promising. The man dragged Gerard to the corner and threw him down roughly before he began kicking garbage over his body. He then grabbed a few of the trash cans and placed them in front of Gerard. He backed up after and smiled as he noted he couldn’t see the boy back there unless he really looked. 

He threw a quick glance around to make sure no one saw him before he ran back to his car and rubbed his hands together. It was freezing. He went back to close the door and saw a pair of gloves sitting on the seat, he figured they belonged to the now dead prostitute he had picked up. He was about to keep them since they were a nice pair but then wanted nothing tying him to the scene. He quickly threw them down before he backed his vehicle out of the alley and took off as flurries began to drift down from the sky.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ... :(


	24. Chapter 24

Frank knocked quietly at Gerard’s door, he knew it was almost three in the morning, and Gerard may already have gone to bed. He saw a light turn on inside the house, casting an eerie glow on the tiny porch, and he felt bad, thinking he had woken Gerard or Mikey up. He was expecting the door to open but it didn’t, he waited another moment and could hear the floor creaking on the other side, timid motions. 

“Mikey? Is that you? It’s me, Frank,” he said, hoping not to scare the younger of the two brothers. 

Mikey quickly unlocked and opened the door to Frank and jumped into his arms, looking scared and sad. “W-Where’s Gerard?” He cried and Frank was a bit taken aback by the strength Mikey was gripping him with. 

“He’s not home?” Frank asked as he stepped in, trying to get Mikey out of the cold. “I figured he would be here by now,” Frank said as he closed the door but still kept a strong arm around Mikey. 

“I want Gerard,” Mikey cried and buried his tear stained face into Frank.

Frank didn’t know what to do or say. Mikey was a shaking mess and he wanted his brother. Frank understood but he didn’t know how he could help Mikey. He didn’t want to bring Mikey with him to go look for Gerard. It was the middle of the night and the alleys weren’t the safest places. 

“Mikey, listen to me,” Frank whispered gently and he knelt down but still kept the boy close to him. “I have to go look for him. Now, I need you to stay here for right now. It’s late and it won’t be safe for you to come with me,” he tried explaining but it only seemed to make Mikey worse.

“No, don’t leave me! I don’t want you to die,” Mikey cried and went back to gripping Frank, burying his face into his shoulder. “You died in my dream,” he cried, shaking. “Everyone I love dies in my dreams,” Mikey whimpered and fussed against Frank. 

It took Frank a moment to understand Mikey and when he did he felt more affection for the little boy. Mikey had, in his own way, told Frank that he loved him. Frank held Mikey close to him and pet the boys hair. “I love you, Mikey,” Frank whispered and kissed the side of his head. 

“I love you too,” Mikey said, pulling back from Frank to show him his tears and pouted lip. “Please, don’t leave me?” 

“Come on,” Frank said and he stood up, hugging Mikey close to him. “We’ll go find him.”

* * *

“Mikey…”

“Frank…”

“Frank...hel-,” Gerard coughed roughly and his eyes peeked open for only a second before he closed them again. Gerard could hear a ringing in his ears and he felt dizzy, nauseous. “Pl-Please..,” he whined like it would somehow help him. He couldn’t move, he just couldn’t. His body was tired, it hurt, it was cold. He wasn’t aware enough to even realize his pants were still pulled down. 

“Frank…,” he breathed before blacking out again.

* * *

Frank had brought Mikey but had made him stay in the car while he was asking around but always staying within sight. By now, most of the people who worked the streets had gone home but there were a few people left out. 

“Did you see a boy?” Frank began as he was talking to a young girl with a nose piercing and blonde hair. He believed her name was Emily, he often gave her needles. He described Gerard as best he could and she didn’t seem to recall him until Frank pointed out where he normally stood. 

“Oh, yeah! Pretty boy,” she giggled and nodded. “He got in a car a few hours ago,” she said, pointing down the road. “Went that way. I saw the car go by a little bit ago but he didn’t get dropped off.”

“So you saw the car?” Frank asked, almost not believing her completely, she was normally too high to really focus. He just didn’t imagine her seeing the car happen to drive by.

“Yeah,” she said before she sniffled harshly, rubbing at her nose. “I know the guy. He picked me up once, refused to pay up and then got really mad. Kind of forced himself on me but hell that shit happens when you have this job,” she shrugged. “It’s just best not to try and fight the john’s when they get like that,” she said. “He sped off so I figured he had another rough transaction.” 

“W-Wait,” Frank said, blinking so he could process everything she had said. “Why haven’t you reported him? Emily...Emily he raped you,” Frank said sadly as he looked to the girl. 

“Yeah, well so did my mom’s boyfriend and when I tried telling her about that I got kicked out,” she said with a shrug and hugged herself. “Now I’m out on the streets. Telling the truth has never done much good for me,” she said, scuffing her foot.

Frank frowned sadly as he looked to her. “You should still report him,” he said to her.

“Who the fuck are you to say so? You some rich, pampered dogooder! Thinking you can just come out here and pity us junkies and whores to make yourself feel better,” she snapped angrily. “You don’t know what it’s like to live like this! To have a hard life, just fuck off,” she said before she pushed by him roughly.

“Hey, please, it’s not like that. I just have to find my friend,” he said sadly as she kept walking. “Please, Emily? His little brother is sitting in my car and he needs him.” Frank was trying to think positively about Gerard’s situation but if truth be told, he had a sinking feeling in his gut, and he wanted to ignore it. 

“Or what, you’ll take away my needles?” She harped and rounded on him. She was taller than him now standing up on the curb while he was still on the street. 

“Emily, I would never do that,” Frank said with a little sigh. “You need them. I just...I just need your help. I swear I won’t ask anything from you ever again,” he pleaded and his eyes showed his sincerity. 

“Fine,” she huffed and kicked her foot of the sidewalk. “They went down there,” she said and pointed a few alleys down, a good ways away. 

“Thank you! Thank you, Emily,” Frank said and he gently touched her arm before he ran over to his car, getting in.

“Does she know where Gee is?” Mikey asked as he looked over to Frank.

Frank paused for a moment before realizing Mikey had meant Gerard, he figured ‘Gee’ must be a nickname. “Uh, maybe. I have to go down here and talk to some people,” Frank said, pulling up in front of the alley. “Now, please, don’t leave the car,” Frank said as he feared what he might find but didn’t want to think on it. 

“Are you warm enough?” Frank asked as he looked to Mikey who was in his jacket and had his gloves on. Frank had also wrapped Mikey’s legs up with a blanket he had had in the backseat. The boy nodded and Frank realized he couldn’t avoid getting out of the car any longer. 

“You’ll come right back...right?” Mikey asked timidly.

“I promise,” Frank said with a little smile before he opened his door. “Be right back,” he said before he closed his door and went around his car, heading into the alley. He locked the doors when he left Mikey in the car and didn’t dare to leave it running. He knew a Mustang drew enough attention without the keys inside with a child. 

Frank found his feet walking slowly, looking for any signs that someone had been here. He walked a little ways down but stopped when it began to grow darker in the alley. He was scared, he wouldn’t deny it, he was nearly shaking from it but he told himself it was just the cold. 

He was about to turn back when his eyes caught something laying on the ground. He walked over and picked up the pair of gloves he had given Gerard. His heart leapt into his throat and he walked a little further down. 

“Gerard?” Frank called as he rounded a corner. “Gerard?” He hissed into the darkest part of the alley, waiting for his eyes to adjust. After a few moment he saw some trash bins at the end and a lot of trash on the ground. He was scared because if Gerard wasn’t here he could be anywhere. Frank half hoped that he had just went home and was okay. That he had gotten away and just dropped the gloves when he had ran for it. 

Frank was about to turn and go back to the car when the trash by the bins shifted and he jumped from being startled. “H-Hello?” Frank cursed himself as his voice shook, he didn’t sound very intimidating. “Who’s there?” 

“F-Fra..,” came a weak wheezing sound from behind the trash bins. 

Frank was about to bolt before his mind caught up and he ran towards the end of the alley. He quickly but carefully moved the trash bins before he started tearing through the pile of trash. He felt someone under it all and choked on a sob as he unveiled Gerard’s face. Blood was covering the left side of Gerard’s head and caking his hair to it, the side of his head was swollen. 

“G-Gerard,” Frank whimpered as he saw the hardly conscious boy before him. “I-I’m here. I’ve got you,” Frank cried and began clearing the trash from Gerard’s body. “O-Oh God,” Frank said as he saw Gerard’s pants pushed down and blood was dried to the inside of his thighs. 

Frank turned when he felt bile surge up his throat and coughed roughly as he threw up over the garbage that Gerard had been left in. He panted after and whined as Gerard didn’t move or respond to him. 

“I’m going to...It’s going to be okay,” Frank breathed before he reached down and carefully got Gerard’s pants up, keeping his gaze innocent. “C-Come here,” Frank whispered and he carefully reached under Gerard’s knees and back and hoisted him up.

Gerard couldn’t see Frank and he couldn’t talk to him but he could hear him. Frank was here, he was holding Gerard, and if Gerard had been conscious enough to do so he would have sobbed. He had been certain that he was going to die but here was Frank, carrying him to safety. 

When Frank rounded the corner he froze as Mikey had been staring toward the alley, waiting for Frank to come back. When Mikey saw Gerard’s body limply laying in Frank’s arms. Frank knew he would never forget that face, it would forever be burned into his memory as the saddest thing he’d ever seen. 

He watched Mikey struggle with the door before he threw it open and ran to Frank, sobbing. “Gee! Gee!” Mikey cried and grabbed onto his brother, he cried as he could see the blood and how lifeless his brother looked. “No, Frank, no!” Mikey cried and leaned his face down, onto his older brother’s chest.

“Mikey, it’s going to be okay,” Frank tried, his own eyes still pouring. “We’re going to get him to the hospital,” Frank said and straightened a little. “Help me get him in the car,” Frank tried as he neared the vehicle with Gerard’s limbs lifelessly dangling from his arms.

* * *

Twenty-three hours. That was how long Frank had been waiting for Gerard to wake up. Every minute felt like it’s own hour as he watched Gerard lay in the hospital bed with gauze wrapped around his head. Mikey was curled up beside Gerard on the bed, he had finally passed out a few hours ago. He had cried for so long that he had worn himself out. Frank was praying for Gerard to wake up before Mikey. He felt so helpless and it was killing him. He wanted to fix everything but he couldn’t. 

“Does he have insurance?” The nurse was asking Frank an hour later. She had come to the room to discuss how Gerard was going to pay for his treatment and the fact that he was taking up a room while unconscious. 

“Uh, I don’t think he does,” Frank said and scratched the back of his head. “Uh, listen,” he said reaching into his back pocket for his wallet. He pulled out one of his cards. “Just send all the bills to that address. I’ll take care of it,” Frank said with a nod to her. “Also, his little brother...Michael Way, he’s a patient here, has cancer. I want to...I want to start paying for his bills as well.” 

“Sir, this will be expensive. It would really be best to discuss insurance or for him to be moved,” she said quietly as she glanced towards the door that was a few steps away. “Mr. Iero, I’m not saying you don’t have the money but...is this a wise choice?”

“It’s fine. I’m not worried about the price. Just make sure he’s cared for,” Frank said quietly to her before he turned, walking back to the room. 

He stood in the doorway for a moment and looked to Gerard laying in the bed with Mikey right beside him. They had performed a rape kit on Gerard and were waiting for him to wake up and consent to them using it to find his attacker. Frank just rubbed at his burning eyes and sighed softly as he looked to Gerard’s bruised cheek and black eye. He needed him to wake up because he was growing even more worried with each passing hour.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Gerard. :(


	25. Chapter 25

Gerard didn’t know much upon awakening but he knew that he was warm and that he could feel someone beside him. He forced his eyes to open and then closed them from how bright the light seemed to be. He waited another moment before easing them open slowly and letting himself adjust to the change of lighting. Once his eyes had been open a moment he realized it really wasn’t that bright in the room he was in, he just hadn’t been ready for it. 

His vision was fuzzy and he had to blink a couple of times to clear his eyes. Gerard could tell that his head didn’t hurt nearly as much as it had and he figured that had something to do with the fact he was in a hospital room. He glanced to his side when he heard a small noise and looked down to see Mikey resting close beside him, curled up into a tiny ball. 

Gerard’s eyes watered a little and he ran a gentle hand over the cap on Mikey’s head, pushing it back a little. He had been scared that he would never again get the chance to see his little brother, now he was here, right beside him. He saw Mikey’s boots on the floor and that he appeared to be in his pajamas but had a jacket draped over him. Gerard had seen that jacket before, he had worn it. He glanced over to his other side and then looked down.

Frank was seated in the chair, close to Gerard’s bed but his head was resting on the mattress, and he was sleeping. He looked worn out and disheveled as he laid there, his head gently pressed into Gerard’s side. Gerard smiled a little weakly from his tired state but he reached up and gently threaded his fingers through Frank’s soft hair. He appreciated this man like no other and he knew he’d never be able to repay Frank for what he had done. 

Frank shifted a little in his sleep when Gerard’s fingers ran through his hair and his eyes opened. He didn’t move though and Gerard figured Frank must still be tired. Frank’s hand that had been resting on the bed reached up and his fingers gently brushed over the skin on Gerard’s wrist. 

Neither spoke a word, they just stayed quietly, and Gerard was content. He was calm because Frank was with him and he was gently rubbing at a bruise on his pale wrist. He felt safe with Frank beside him, like nothing could happen to him and Mikey, it was a good feeling. 

“I was…,” Frank whispered before he just shook his head and closed his eyes. Gerard frowned a little but urged him on by gently brushing his fingers over Frank’s cheek that had grown a small amount of stubble from his long stay at the hospital. 

“I was just...I was scared,” Frank admitted sheepishly. “I was scared you weren’t going to wake up. Mikey was so upset. I didn’t mean to let him see you like that but I couldn’t avoid it and…,” Frank just sighed and closed his eyes. 

“Frank...everything is going to be fine. I’m just so happy that you came to look for me,” Gerard whispered back. He smiled a little as Frank took Gerard’s hand from his hair and held it, placing delicate kisses on the bruised knuckles before resting his cheek against it. 

It was then that there was a quiet vibrating across the room in Gerard’s jacket that was folded and placed on the table. Frank pulled back a little and Gerard felt his hand was cold without Frank’s warm cheek and breath on it. 

“It’s been going off for a while,” Frank said quietly as he scratched at his messed up hair. “Do you want me to get it for you?” 

“Uh, yeah. I guess so,” Gerard said before he glanced away from Frank. It was like the spell was broken between them now and Gerard realized, Frank wasn’t his. For a few moments it had felt like he was and he wondered if Frank had felt it too. 

Frank came back and held out Gerard’s phone to him. He clicked on the screen and saw that he had twenty missed calls. His face scrunched up in confusion but then he saw the date and time. He’d been asleep for almost two days. He was supposed to go out with Jason the night before. 

“Frank, why didn’t you answer it?” Gerard asked a little desperately. 

“I..Wha-...Gerard, I’m not just going to answer your phone. That’s rude,” Frank said honestly. 

“He’s probably worried sick,” Gerard said as he went through a couple of texts he had. Some were asking why Gerard hadn’t shown for their date and if he was on his way. There was mostly bitter texts after that, then none. “You could have told him I was here!” 

“Gerard, I didn’t know who it was! I still don’t,” Frank tried to explain, seeing as Gerard was getting upset with him.

“It was Jason,” Gerard said with a sigh. “The one who’s supposed to be here,” Gerard said as he looked to his phone but then he realized how he sounded. He looked to Frank with an apologetic face. “I..I didn’t mean it like that,” Gerard said quietly. 

“It’s fine. I get it,” Frank said with a little shrug but his sad expression and the way he looked only to the ground told Gerard that he didn’t get it. Frank’s hands were in his pockets and he scuffed his foot a little. “I’m going to make some calls. I have to check up on some stuff,” Frank said before he walked over to the door. “I’ll be back,” he said quietly but still just didn’t look at Gerard, he motioned down the hall before he walked out. 

Gerard frowned and looked down a little before he just told himself to let it go. It wasn’t his job to make Frank happy, it was his job to make Jason happy. He quickly pulled up Jason’s number and dialed it, listening to the phone ring. There was no answer and Gerard frowned before he listened to the voicemail and waited for the beep.

“Jason. It’s...It’s me,” Gerard squeaked and shifted a little but was mindful of Mikey resting. “Um, I got...I got hurt and I’ve been at the hospital. That’s why I missed our date. I’m so sorry,” Gerard frowned, feeling guilty. “Please, call me? ...Bye,” Gerard hung up the phone and rubbed his eyes weakly.

* * *

“Frank?” Mikey asked as he was sitting across from the other in the hospital cafeteria. Mikey had woken up and had been really happy to see his brother awake as well. Everything was okay now and was going to work out, in Mikey’s mind but now Frank seemed upset and Mikey didn’t know why.

“Yeah, Mikes?” Frank said a little blandly as he helped Mikey open his coke.

“Gerard calls me that,” Mikey said with a smile but then remembered his question. “What’s wrong? Why are you sad?”

“I’m not sad, bud. I’m alright,” Frank said as he placed the can back in front of Mikey who picked it up and sipped it. “Just tired,” he said quietly and gave Mikey a small smile. “And…,” Frank sighed in defeat. “I’m just worried about your brother.”

“He’s okay,” Mikey said with a little smile. “Jason called him back and he’s coming to see us. That will make him happy,” Mikey said before he took a bite of his pizza. 

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m sure,” Frank said, doing all he could to keep the bitterness from his tone which was easy since he just let the sadness smother it. “I’m happy he found someone for you both,” and Frank almost wished that he was lying but he wasn’t. Truth be told, he cared for the two brother’s enough to let them be happy, even if that meant him going away. He had known them for two months and even though he knew that wasn’t a very long time, he realized he had come to care for them too strongly. Connecting to them since they had so much in common, more than either of the brother’s knew. 

Mikey just ate his lunch and sipped his coke as he sat with Frank who was picking at his own. Mikey didn’t like Jason, he knew that much for sure but he would like him for Gerard’s sake. He remembered back to what Gerard had said about him needing to like Jason more than he liked Frank and he frowned. Mikey really liked Frank, he loved him, he didn’t think he could like Jason like that.

* * *

“No, I’m sorry,” Frank heard Jason saying as he brought Mikey back to Gerard’s room. “I just wish you had found a way to get a hold of me,” Jason said quietly, speaking to Gerard.

Frank rolled his eyes. He knew that Jason’s words would make Gerard feel bad and it wasn’t something that Gerard could control. He had been unconscious for God sakes. 

“Mikey!” Jason said with a smile and Mikey mimicked it, trying to be nice to Jason. “You been taking good care of your brother for me?” 

“Yeah,” Mikey said with a smile and sat beside Gerard on the bed, looking to Jason. 

Frank shot a glance to the large bouquet of flowers sitting on the stand next to Gerard’s bed and the balloons floating from them. There was a small teddy bear between the flowers, holding a heart that said, ‘Get Well Soon.’ Frank forced the tiniest smile onto his face as Gerard was looking to them and gently touching the petals, seeming happy. 

“Oh, hey,” Jason said, just realizing Frank’s presence. “Fred?”

“Frank,” he quietly corrected and sighed through his nose, he had to like this guy. 

“Frank, right. I’ve got Mikey, you don’t have to watch him anymore. You can just head on home,” Jason said with a small smile, seeming helpful but Frank wondered if there was something underlying in his gaze.

“Yeah...Yeah.... Alright,” Frank said before going over to his jacket and pulling it on. Mikey quickly got up and ran over to Frank, hugging onto him.

“Do you have to go already?” Mikey asked in a whiny tone. “I haven’t seen you in a long time,” Mikey tried as he looked up to Frank and left his cheek resting against Frank’s shirt. 

“I know, bud but I don’t want to be in the way,” Frank said quietly to Mikey but he knew Jason had heard. Frank noted Jason made no attempt to correct Frank’s accusation. “I’ll pick you up next week and we’ll go sledding or something,” Frank suggested with a smile. “It’s supposed to snow more.”

“Promise?” Mikey whispered and nuzzled himself closer to Frank.

“I promise,” Frank whispered tenderly before he leaned down to kiss the top of Mikey’s head and hugged him tight, kneeling so he was easier for Mikey to hold onto. 

“I love you, Frank,” Mikey said quietly as his head rested on the man’s shoulder. 

Gerard had been looking down shyly at his hands but he raised his head when Mikey spoke the phrase to Frank. Mikey never said that to anyone except for him now, it was weird to hear it directed at someone else. He heard Frank return the phrase and this really got him looking. Jason cleared his throat awkwardly and gave Gerard a glance before shifting his eyes towards Frank and Mikey.

“Mikey, come on... Frank has to go,” Gerard said quietly and he felt bad because he didn’t even want Frank to go. Frank had just saved him and now things felt distant between them, it made Gerard feel heavy and wrong. 

“Be good,” Frank whispered and kissed the top of Mikey’s head once more before he adjusted the boy's hat. “Bye, bud,” Frank said with a small smile at Mikey. Frank then went like he was stepping towards Gerard but Jason was standing in the way and Frank thought better of it.

Gerard noticed and he frowned as Frank just turned away from him and headed to the door. “I hope you feel better,” Frank muttered quietly and finally glanced up to Gerard but only for a second before he nodded his head and left. 

Gerard frowned and instantly felt his chest tighten, knowing Frank wasn’t going to be back to check on him. Things had been perfect that morning when he and Frank had woken up but then Gerard had ruined it by saying the wrong thing and hurting Frank. 

“Well, you don’t look that upset when I leave,” Jason said with an air of it being a joke but his eyes said differently. 

“Oh, I...No,” Gerard stuttered quietly and shook his head, trying to get a hold of his tongue. “He was just...the one who found me,” Gerard said. “I don’t know. I guess it just makes me uneasy that he’s not here now.” 

“Well, I’m here now so it’s all going to be fine,” Jason said with a smile before he leaned down and kissed Gerard gently. “Now, we have some things to discuss. We can’t have you working anymore and I don’t want you living in that neighborhood.”

“Not...Not in front of Mikey,” Gerard whispered, trying to avoid it a little at the moment. He was still uneasy without Frank around him. Frank had been the one to rescue him and keep him safe, now he was gone, and Gerard felt exposed. 

“I thought you might say that so I got someone to watch him for a little bit,” Jason said and pointed towards the doorway where an older lady now stood. “Here name is Yvette. She’s great with kids,” Jason smiled but then he saw Gerard frowning. 

“I don’t want him going with her. I don’t know her,” Gerard said and he held onto Mikey’s hand. “You should have just let Frank stay and watch him.”

“Frank was tired and needed his rest,” Jason tried and frowned. “Yvette won’t leave the hospital with him. It’s fine. You’re overreacting,” Jason said with a sigh through his nose. 

Gerard frowned as he thought he was making Jason mad with him and then just looked to Mikey, wanting Mikey to decide for him. “W-Will you be okay?” Gerard asked and eyed the older woman with fear. She dressed like a social worker and part of him was scared that this was all a ploy to take Mikey away from him. 

“I’ll be fine,” Mikey lied for his older brother. Jason had shot him a look when Gerard hadn’t been paying attention and he didn’t want to upset Jason and in turn, upset Gerard. He didn’t want to leave Gerard’s side or go with this horrible looking woman but he did. 

Gerard watched Mikey walk away, seeming unsure before he glanced back to Jason. “What do we need to talk about?” 

“I’ve already begun the process of moving your things to my place,” Jason said firmly as he sat on the edge of the bed. “The movers are there now, boxing things up.”

“You what!?” Gerard shot up in bed a little before he winced and laid back. “I...Why would you do that?” Gerard asked, feeling like he was being violated. Jason didn’t have a right to tell people to move his and Mikey’s things. He was thinking of all his work outfits in the closet that some man was going to see and pack up. 

“I...Gerard, I care about you and Mikey so much,” Jason said quietly. “I know it hasn’t been that long between us but...I want you safe and protected. I want you to live with me,” Jason tried and he took Gerard’s hand gently in his. “Please, Gerard? I’ll let you redecorate the whole place and you can just stay at home and be with Mikey. I’ll take care of you both. I’ll take care of everything if you’d just be mine.”

This was it. This was what Gerard had wanted to hear for so long it almost made him sick but then, in the back of his mind, there was Frank. He didn’t want Jason to say this to him, he wanted Frank to. He wanted Frank to take care of him and Mikey but he knew his chances only grew slimmer and slimmer with each passing day. Gerard’s eyes watered at the thought.

He looked down before he tried to calm himself and then looked back up, feeling like he was going to throw up when he looked to Jason’s expectant face. “Please, Gerard? Will you be mine?” There was another pause after Jason asked this. 

“I will,” Gerard whispered and before he knew it, Jason was kissing him deeply. A single tear escaped down Gerard’s cheek as he moved his lips with Jason’s but all he wanted was Frank.

* * *

Mikey was sitting on the floor of his empty bedroom, hugging onto the stuffed pig Frank had bought for him. He didn’t like that they were moving and that all of his things were no longer in the house that he had come to call home. This had been the first solid place he had had with Gerard since their parents had died. They had bounced around for so long that when they had finally stayed in this house for a couple of months, Mikey had felt safe again, now they were leaving it.

Mikey looked up as he heard someone walk into his doorway, Gerard was standing before him with a crooked, saddened smile. They had only stopped by for a moment, to grab a few last minute things, and so Mikey could say goodbye like he wanted.

“You know,” Gerard said quietly and he came over and sat cross legged next to Mikey. “I’m going to miss this place,” he sighed out. “We’ve had a lot of good memories here,” Gerard whispered before he pulled Mikey into his lap and held him tightly.

Gerard had just gotten out of the hospital a few hours ago and they were leaving for Jason’s after this. He didn’t know how he felt about it, seeing his home empty. It made him uncomfortable but he was trying not to think about it. He would move in with Jason and Mikey would get a better life.

Mikey nuzzled himself into Gerard and sighed out through his nose softly. “We’re going to be moving away from mom and dad,” Mikey whispered quietly. He was thinking about his parents who were buried near their home. He didn’t like the idea of moving across town and leaving them.

“We’ll come back and visit them,” Gerard promised as he gently rubbed Mikey’s back and glanced around his empty room. He gently sighed out through his nose and tried not to think too heavily on it. He never thought it would be so hard to leave this crummy little house they lived in.

“Who’s going to live here now?” Mikey asked quietly, trying to imagine who would take his room after he was gone.

“I don’t know,” Gerard said honestly and then was thinking about who would take his own room. The one that Frank had stayed the night with him in and held him and his little brother. The first night Gerard had spent the night with a man and he hadn’t slept with him.

“I wish we could just stay here,” Mikey said quietly as he gently pulled on the ear of his stuffed pig.

“I know but this is going to be better for us. Jason has a really nice place and you’ll have your own room and everything,” Gerard tried even though he agreed with Mikey entirely. He couldn’t let Mikey know that he didn’t want to go because they had to. Gerard had worked for this for so long he would be an idiot to pass it up.

“I’ll try it...for you,” Mikey said with a small smile before he slowly stood up and sighed a little. He stuck out his hand to help up Gerard. When Gerard stood up, Mikey wrapped his arms around him. “I love you,” Mikey said quietly. “I’m excited,” he lied.

“I love you too and you’re still not very good at lying,” Gerard said with a little smile.

“You said that’s a great trait to have though,” Mikey said and smiled a little bit.

“It is,” Gerard said quietly and fixed Mikey’s crooked hat with an endearing smile. “Jason is going to take good care of us,” Gerard whispered and he really prayed that he would. He had only known Jason for about a month, he couldn’t honestly vouch for the guy but it was a better option.

“I hope so,” Mikey said quietly and then took Gerard’s hand in his and took one more look around the room. “I’m ready,” Mikey whispered before he walked out with Gerard but then let his hand go and walked outside to Jason who was waiting at the car.

Gerard stopped at the end of the hallway and looked into the living room, it was empty but he could pretty much see the couch there with him and Mikey on it. Both laughing as Gerard was tickling Mikey and they were watching their cartoons. He could see their breakfasts in the kitchens and when he glanced down the hall it was like he could see his bed with him and Mikey curled up on it. Gerard sighed and wiped the dampness from his eye and straightened himself up. He walked out of the house and closed the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took a while! Christmas has been crazy! 
> 
> I hope everyone has a great holiday! 
> 
> I also hope you enjoyed this chapter! :)


	26. Chapter 26

Mikey was staring out the window of Jason’s car at the large skyscraper that he called home. Mikey’s eyebrow raised and he glanced forward to Gerard. He didn’t understand how this could be someone’s home. It looked nothing like the house he and Gerard had lived in. It didn’t even look anything like the house he had lived in with his parents. 

“Do you like it?” Jason asked, glancing over his shoulder to see Mikey in the backseat looking up at the building. 

“It’s okay,” Mikey said and looked down to his stuffed pig. 

Jason glanced to Gerard who gave him a crooked smile. “He’ll get used to it,” Gerard whispered and reached over, grabbing Jason’s hand. “We appreciate this,” Gerard said with a little smile. 

“Well, alright. Let’s go inside,” Jason said with a little smile before he got out of the vehicle. 

Mikey went around to the trunk and waited for it to open and Gerard joined him. “Hey, you two. The boys will get it,” Jason said and motioned to the young kid with a vest who he was handing his keys to. 

“Oh, come on, Mikey,” Gerard said with a little smile. 

Mikey grabbed onto Gerard’s hand and started walking with him up to the large doors of Jason’s _home_. Mikey was looking around the large entrance of the building. There was a lot of people and Mikey pressed himself into Gerard’s side and hid his face behind his brother. 

Jason glanced down to Mikey and then to Gerard. “He’s shy,” Gerard whispered quietly so that Mikey couldn’t hear him. 

“Well, there are classes for that,” Jason said with a little smile. “We can get someone to help him,” he added. 

Gerard glanced down to Mikey and gripped his hand tighter. He didn’t look at his brother as someone who needed help. He was just shy, lots of kids were. He was out of his element and probably overwhelmed. Gerard only nodded and smiled though because he wanted Jason to be happy with him. 

Mikey continued to hide behind Gerard even when they were in the elevator because there was an older woman in there with them, eyeing Gerard and Mikey. They weren’t dressed like the other people in the building, Mikey even noticed it. Gerard stepped in front of his brother a little more to keep him from the woman's stare. 

The woman then looked him up and down and he could see the disgust on her face. Gerard would normally say something to the woman but this was where Jason lived, he didn’t want to upset him so he shamefully looked down and remained silent. 

Finally the door dinged and the woman got out, Gerard felt better without her there. He sighed a little and rubbed at Mikey’s back. “You okay, baby?” 

“Ye-,” Mikey squeaked but was interrupted by Jason. 

“You shouldn’t baby him,” Jason said quietly and Gerard found himself glaring at him. “I’m sorry. I was just trying to help,” Jason said before he turned away, looking towards the ground.

Gerard instantly felt like he had done wrong and frowned. “I’m sorry. It’s my fault I’m just overprotective,” Gerard said quietly and looked to Jason. He leaned forward a little and rested his chin on Jason’s shoulder. “Do you forgive me?” Gerard pouted playfully and then smiled when Jason smiled to him. 

“Of course,” Jason said and pressed a gentle kiss to Gerard’s mouth. 

The elevator dinged again and they stepped off and onto Jason’s floor. Gerard had dropped Mikey’s hand and the boy continued to stand on the elevator and hug onto his pig. He was scared of stepping onto the floor and who else might be around. 

“Come on,” Gerard whispered and motioned for him to follow. 

Mikey hesitated before he quickly ran forward and grabbed Gerard’s hand, hiding behind him again. They walked down the hallway until they got to the last door and Jason got out his keys. 

“You’re going to love it Mikey,” Jason said and smiled down towards the young boy who then darted his head behind his older brother. Jason turned and opened the door, stepping out of the way so Gerard could go in first. 

Gerard had seen the apartment the night he had come back to Jason’s place so he just tried to guide Mikey in. “There’s the kitchen,” Gerard said pointing so Mikey would glance out around him and he did. 

“Yeah and you’re welcome to anything in there. It’s all yours, buddy,” Jason said with a bit of a smile to Mikey who then went back to hiding behind Gerard.

“Gee? Where’s my room?” Mikey asked so quietly he hardly made a sound.

Gerard knelt down in front of Mikey, prying the boy's arms from around him. He knew Mikey hated new places and change but he had been hoping that he would take this better. “It’s down that hall,” Gerard pointed, knowing where the spare bedroom was. “And if you need me and Jason in the middle of the night, we’re-,” but Mikey walked around him and instantly went down the hallway to the room where his things were. He quickly went inside and shut the door. Gerard sighed and rubbed at his eyes a little before he stood up. 

“Hey, hey, hey,” Jason whispered and came over to Gerard, wrapping his arms around him, pulling him into a hug. “It’ll be okay. He just needs to adjust,” Jason said with a small smile as Gerard wrapped his arms around him. “Give him some time. He’ll come around,” he whispered and rubbed at Gerard’s back. “Okay?” 

“Yeah,” Gerard whispered and nuzzled himself into Jason. He was looking over his shoulder though, to Mikey’s door down the hall.

* * *

Gerard had made dinner for everyone, trying to show Jason that he was useful, and could be helpful. Mikey still hadn’t left his room and Gerard hadn’t pressured him to but it was time to eat now and he needed to come out. Gerard walked down the hallway and passed the office door where Jason was taking a quick work call. 

Gerard gently knocked on the door before he opened it and stepped inside. Mikey was nowhere insight and Gerard slowly walked forward and knelt down on his knees, looking under the bed. Mikey was curled up with his blankets and stuffed pig, awake but just laying there.

“Mikey, it’s time to eat,” Gerard said quietly. “Come out of there,” he tried and he reached under, gently petting Mikey’s head. 

“I’m not hungry,” Mikey said quietly with a frown on his face. 

“Mikey, it’s dinner time. Come out and at least try to eat something. Please? For me?” Gerard asked gently. He kept gently petting over Mikey’s soft cap before he heard the door creak behind him and saw Jason standing in it. “We’ll be out in just a moment,” Gerard said, forcing a small smile. “Dinner’s on the table,” he said quietly.

“Alright,” Jason said with a small smile to Gerard before he eyed Mikey laying under the bed suspiciously and left the room. 

“I’m not hungry,” Mikey repeated and just looked over to the corner of the room, avoiding Gerard’s stare. 

“Well,” Gerard said with a gentle sigh, “just come out if you get hungry, okay?” Gerard gently brushed his hand over the back of Mikey’s head and let it trail down over his brother’s neck. “I love you,” Gerard tried quietly. “It’s going to get better. I promise,” Gerard whispered before he retracted his hand and stood up. 

Mikey rolled over and faced the wall as he held onto his pig tightly and waited for Gerard to leave his room. Mikey didn’t like their new places. It was different and it was weird and nothing like their old home. All of his toys and things were here but they were moved around and all looked different in the new setting. He also didn’t like the smell of his room, it just smelt like plastic and cleaner, it bothered him. He wanted the slightly musty smell of his room and the warm brown carpet back. The floor in his new room was hardwood and it hurt him to lay on but he didn’t move. He felt safer under his bed than he did out in the open. He just wanted to go to sleep and forget about the fact that he wouldn’t be able to go home ever again.

* * *

Gerard was sitting across from Jason quietly eating and he found that the air was awkward. He didn’t know if it was just him or if Jason could feel it as well. He was trying to think up something to say, to make things feel easier between them. His eyes shifted to the empty seat beside him where a place had been set for Mikey but remained untouched. 

“Gerard,” Jason said to get the other man’s attention and once he had it, he continued. “I understand that Mikey is your little brother,” Jason said, treading carefully, “but I do think you need to be a little firmer with him. He clearly acts childish.”

Gerard’s jaw tightened a little and he shifted in his seat. “That’s not your fault though! I understand,” Jason quickly said, holding out his hand to try and calm Gerard. He was clearly already beginning to seethe. “But, I’m just _suggesting_ that, maybe now that he has a steady home, it’s time for him to grow up a little,” Jason said quietly, hoping not to upset Gerard. 

It was clear to Jason that Gerard had been letting Mikey do whatever he wanted and not challenging him. Jason knew that kids needed structure and stability, clearly Gerard hadn’t given that to Mikey. It showed in how Mikey did whatever he wanted to and Gerard didn’t make him do otherwise. 

“You should have him join us for dinner,” Jason said. “I would like him to join us for our first night together.” 

Gerard wanted Jason to be happy with him and Mikey. If he upset Jason, he was realizing, he and Mikey would be out on the street. Gerard instantly got a sinking feeling in his stomach.

“I’ll...I’ll go get him,” Gerard said before he stood and walked back down the hallway. He quickly went into Mikey’s room and knelt back down on the floor. “Mikey, come eat,” he said urgently. 

Mikey slowly rolled back over and faced Gerard. “I said that I’m not hungry,” Mikey said quietly. 

“Well I’m telling you to come eat,” Gerard said and motioned to the door. “Now get up and come out.” 

Mikey frowned at Gerard and hugged his pig a little closer. “I don’t want to,” Mikey said and looked down.

“Let’s go!” Gerard said sternly but quietly enough that Jason wouldn’t hear him. 

Mikey frowned before he slowly eased himself out from under his bed and stood up. He didn’t like that Gerard was making him but he wanted to listen to his older brother. 

“No, pig,” Gerard said and took the pig from Mikey’s arms and put it on the bed. 

“But Gee, I-,” Mikey started and his eyes looked saddened. 

“Stop it! If we upset Jason he could kick us out. It’s winter Mikey,” Gerard said, kneeling in front of his little brother so that he would understand why he had to behave. “So you need to listen to Jason and do whatever he wants you to,” Gerard said before he gently pet back Mikey’s hair that stuck out the front of his cap. “Okay?” 

Mikey nodded sadly and kept his gaze to the ground. “Alright, let’s go,” Gerard said before he opened the door to Mikey’s bedroom and let his little brother go out first.

“There he is,” Jason said with a smile. “Your brother’s a pretty good cook. This is delicious. You’re going to love it,” Jason said as Mikey sat down. He put some of the meal onto Mikey’s plate for him. 

“Thank you,” Mikey said quietly before he reached out for his fork and started eating. 

“I’m going to have to work tomorrow but I want you two to feel free to make yourselves at home, alright?” Jason said to them both. Gerard smiled and Mikey just stared to his plate. 

“Mikey has an appointment coming up. I’ll have to take him to that. His doctors on the other side of town,” Gerard said quietly. 

“Well you just let me know if you need anything, okay?” Jason said and looked to Gerard.

“Well, actually, I meant to talk to you about that. I think I still need to work because I have to pay for Mikey’s appointments and everything,” Gerard said quietly.

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll take care of it,” Jason said with a smile. “You can just be my escort,” Jason added with a grin but the comment made Gerard more uncomfortable than it should have. “Just tell me how much you need,” Jason spoke before taking a bite.

Mikey finished about half his plate and then stood up to leave. “Mikey. Did you ask to be excused?” 

Mikey looked to his brother, unsure of what Jason meant. He had never had to ask to be excused before. “I-I’m sorry,” Mikey said quietly and looked between Gerard and Jason. “May I go to my room?” 

“No, sit down,” Gerard said and he hated being this way with Mikey. He could see how uncomfortable and confused Mikey was with everything and Gerard could nearly feel his stomach acid burning inside him. He just feared Jason kicking them out. They would die out in the cold if Jason chose to make them leave. Gerard realized now that it was stupid of him to move in with Jason so early in their relationship. He just hadn’t really had a lot of time to think about it, the decision had been made for him. 

Gerard’s phone started ringing in his jacket pocket and Mikey mindlessly got up and answered it. He had always been allowed to at home so he didn’t think about it. He had answered before Gerard could stop him. 

“Frank! Hi!” Mikey said excitedly when the person responded to his greeting. Gerard noticed that this was the first time Mikey had smiled since Frank had left him at the hospital that morning. 

“No...we don’t live there anymore,” Mikey said quietly and frowned. 

Gerard frowned to Jason apologetically before he looked down. He figured Frank had gone to their house to see them only to see that no one was there anymore. 

“We’re living with Jason now,” Mikey said and walked towards his bedroom door. “Yeah, Gerard’s doing great.”

“Mikey,” Gerard said quietly, getting his little brother to turn around and look at him. “Tell Frank you’ll call him back after dinner,” he said. 

Mikey sighed and frowned before he turned back again. “Gerard says I have to go and sit at the table while they eat,” Mikey said quietly to Frank. He was frowning, Gerard could see it but then he smiled all big and nodded as if Frank could see him. “I love you too,” Mikey said quietly. “Night, Frank,” Mikey said before he hung up and then went back to sitting down at the table.

“So you and Frank are good friends?” Jason said with a small smile as he looked to Mikey. 

“Yeah, I met him when he was Gerard’s boyfriend,” Mikey said with a challenging look to Jason. He didn’t like him and he knew Gerard had made him get off the phone because of Jason, so it only made him dislike Jason more. 

“Oh, he was?” Jason asked and then looked to Gerard who just shook his head and had his mouth open like he wanted to speak but he couldn’t. 

“Yeah. He was really great,” Mikey said with a little smile. “Then you showed up,” Mikey said with a frown. 

“Well, clearly Gerard found something about me he liked. I just want to make you and Gerard happy, Mikey. I’m not trying to get in the way of you and Frank being friends. You can see Frank whenever you’d like,” Jason said with a small smile. 

“Now,” Mikey said, not looking away from Jason. 

“What?” Jason asked confused. 

“I want to see Frank now,” Mikey challenged. 

“It’s late,” Jason said as he looked back down to his plate.

“Liar,” Mikey said as he glared at Jason. 

“Excuse me?” Jason asked looking back to Mikey.

“Michael James! Go to your room!” Gerard said angrily. 

“Good. That’s what I wanted anyway,” Mikey said before he stood up and walked down the hall to his room and slammed the door. 

“H-He’s...He’s not normally like this. He’s just...He’s adjusting,” Gerard nearly begged as he looked to Jason. “I’m really sorry,” he said and frowned. 

“It’s alright but I do think I’m finished with my dinner,” Jason said before he stood up and walked down the hall to the room Gerard was supposed to share with him, quietly closing the door. 

Gerard frowned before he leaned forward and rested his elbows on the table and put his face into his hands. He stayed still for a few more moments before he got up and cleared the table of the leftovers and plates. He went into the kitchen started to put everything away.

* * *

Gerard slowly entered the bedroom after he had showered and stood with his back to the door. Jason was sitting on the bed, back to him rubbing at his neck. Gerard slowly kneeled on the bed and crawled over to him, he placed his hands on Jason’s shoulders and rubbed at the sore muscles. 

“I didn’t hear you come in,” Jason said with a small smile. “You’re so quiet,” he glanced back at Gerard who smile at him a little. Jason looked back down and softly hung his head forward, letting Gerard work his sore muscles. 

“Sorry, I’ll make more noise next time,” Gerard said teasingly before he giggled. 

Jason grabbed one of Gerard’s hands and kissed it before he turned and pressed his mouth against Gerard’s. Gerard slowly kissed him back and rested his hands on Jason’s shoulders from the front. This enticed Jason enough for him to leaned forward and press Gerard down against the bed. 

Gerard whimpered a little and turned his head away uncomfortably but Jason just moved his mouth to Gerard’s neck. “J-Jason,” Gerard said quietly and tried his best not to pull away. He had just been raped the other night and even though he had been unconscious for most of it, it was still fresh in his mind. 

“I-I don’t know if I want to do this...tonight,” Gerard said quietly but frowned. “It’s just...you know...the other night…,” Gerard whispered and shifted his eyes away from Jason. 

“Oh…,” Jason said and didn’t do well to hide his disappointment. “Okay. It’s fine, babe. I understand,” Jason said before pecking Gerard’s lips and pulling away. 

Gerard saw Jason’s disappointment and felt bad, he looked down but grabbed onto Jason’s arms. “No,” Gerard said. “I-I want to try,” he lied but he felt a little better when Jason smiled and didn’t question in. He crawled back on top of Gerard who closed his eyes and tried to ignore the sick feeling in his gut when Jason’s mouth was on his neck again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, Gerard...


	27. Chapter 27

“Baby?” Gerard cracked open his eyes when he heard Jason’s voice and yawned tiredly. It was still pretty dark outside he looked around in confusion.

“Jason..? Is something wrong?” Gerard asked and slowly sat up but Jason’s hand gently touched his chest, having him lay back down. 

“I’m just going to work,” Jason said with a little smile. He smiled at Gerard’s cute tired eyes and leaned in, pressing a kiss to his lips. 

Gerard smiled tiredly before he reached out and slipped his hand under Jason’s suit jacket, rubbing at his cloth covered side. “I wish you didn’t have to go,” Gerard whispered tiredly and shift himself a little closer to Jason’s warmth. He was still naked under his sheets and he wanted Jason to cuddle him again. He missed the warm intimacy already. 

“I know, me either,” Jason hummed before he kissed Gerard again and then his cheek. “You just have a relaxing day. Take a bath, read a book, rest,” Jason said quietly and carefully checked the bump on Gerard’s head. “I don’t want you to do too much and stress yourself,” Jason nuzzled his nose into Gerard’s cheek, feeling his warm skin. 

“You’re amazing,” Gerard said calmly as he was relaxing in Jason’s warm sheets. “I should spend some time with Mikey today though. I want him to get more comfortable here,” Gerard said quietly. “I’m still really sorry about last night,” Gerard whispered before he frowned. 

“Don’t even worry about it,” Jason said with a little smile. “I know this is a big change for him and he still doesn’t know me well enough. Also, maybe you could call Frank and have him watch him. Then you could have a relaxing day and Mikey will be happy,” Jason suggested. “I just want him to be happy.” 

“Alright. Well, I’ll call Frank then,” Gerard said with a small smile and he yawned softly. 

“Good,” Jason said with a smile before he gave Gerard a gentle kiss on his temple. “Get some more rest, baby. I’ll see you tonight.”

“Have a good day, babe,” Gerard yawned before he laid back down and curled up with the warm blankets. Trying to ignore that even though he had dreamed of moments like these, it just didn’t feel right.

* * *

Mikey had called and excitedly made his plans with Frank, now he was sitting by the door waiting. Gerard sat himself down beside him and gave him a little smile. “I love you,” Gerard whispered as he looked to Mikey who had been distant from him all morning.

“I love you too,” Mikey said, looking down to the stuffed pig he had in his hands. 

“Please don’t be upset with me? I just want you to be happy,” Gerard said quietly and gently took his hand. “I know this is different for you and it’s strange but it’s going to be better like this. Jason really wants you to be happy with him and here,” Gerard admitted and looked to his little brother. 

Mikey sighed softly through his nose and just looked to his pig with a frown. “I just miss our old house,” Mikey stated in a quiet voice. 

“I know. Me too but please try? You said you would...for me,” Gerard reminded him. 

“I will,” Mikey said defeatedly. 

There was a quiet knock on the door and Mikey quickly stood up before he flung it open. “Frank!” Mikey cheered and wrapped his arms around the man standing before him.

Gerard stood now and looked to Frank who was wearing a pair of jeans with the knees ripped out and a black shirt, his jean jacket over it. Gerard tried to ignore how good his hair looked as well, it was slightly disheveled like he had just brushed it back. Gerard gave him a small, shy wave and smile. 

“Hey,” Frank said with a bit of a smile. “How are you feeling?” Frank stepped in with Mikey and closed the door. He glanced around the large, expensive apartment. Gerard now glanced to the flowers in Frank’s hand and smiled a little.

“I’m good, better. Thank you,” Gerard said. He awkwardly tucked a piece of hair behind his ear and looked down a little. 

“I was going to bring you these last night but you weren’t at your house,” Frank said quietly and he held out flowers for Gerard. “Well, I guess your old house,” Frank added. 

“Oh, thank you,” Gerard smiled more now and took them from Frank. “And yeah, I’m sorry about that. Jason surprised us by moving us in with him,” Gerard said and tried to seem more excited than he was. Truth be told he would have rather waited a little longer, even with how badly his previous life was. 

“Well, that’s good,” Frank said with a bit of a smile. “Things must be pretty serious between the two of you then. Moving in together so fast.” 

Gerard kind of raised an eyebrow at Frank at his last statement. “Well, it depends on who you ask I guess. I really like him and he feels the same, I don’t think time should matter,” Gerard said defiantly.

“Oh, I wasn’t trying to...I wasn’t being rude. I’m sorry,” Frank said sincerely and was frowning a little. 

Gerard glanced downward and just chose to ignore what had just happened between the two of them. He would of had to admit that he had snapped at Frank pointlessly. “So what are you both doing today?” 

“Uh,” Frank said, noting Gerard’s choice to ignore his comment. “I figured we’d go to the comic book store for a little bit and then hit the movies or something,” Frank said with a smile and rubbed the top of Mikey’s head playfully. 

Mikey smiled and excitedly jumped up onto Frank, making him nearly fall over. “Umph,” Frank huffed before laughing and held onto Mikey, pulling him up properly. “You ready, bud?”

“Yeah,” Mikey said happily and nuzzled his face into Frank’s neck. “Bye, Gee.”

“Be safe,” Gerard said with a little smile. 

“I will. Always,” Mikey said with a smile before he turned his attention back to Frank. “Let’s go,” he squealed excitedly and giggled as Frank readjusted him on his back. 

“Are you sure you don’t want to come?” Frank asked, looking to Gerard. He saw Gerard standing there, hugging himself, and he was in this large apartment all by himself. 

“Jason wants me to stay home and relax,” Gerard said, remembering Jason’s suggestion and thinking a warm bath sounded nice. He was just trying to convince himself that it would be more fun to relax than to go with Frank and Mikey, he was having a hard time doing so. 

“Oh,” Frank said, nodding his head like he understood. “I guess sitter was a good title for me then,” Frank said in a slightly unamused tone. 

“Come on, bud,” Frank said with a smile, turning his attention to Mikey now. “I’ll have him back by seven,” Frank said, his voice noticeably dropping joy just by talking to Gerard instead of Mikey. Gerard tried to ignore the feeling that started seeping from his heart and spread throughout his chest. He nodded a little because he couldn’t bring himself to speak and then he just kind of turned away to hide how sad his eyes were.

“Frank, can I come live with you?” Mikey asked quietly as they were leaving out the door. Gerard heard him before the door closed and he hung his head before he rubbed at his eyes.

* * *

Gerard had only gotten into the tub a little before five and he found himself unable to relax. He was thinking about everything that was going on and it was impossible to find peace. He had upset Frank, again and Mikey was upset as well. He sighed out softly and sunk under the surface of the water, hoping it would somehow block out his thoughts. 

Gerard had a brief moment where he figured he could just stay under the surface and not come back up. He obviously knew he would die but the thought of the silence and his mind finally being at peace seemed like it would be worth the temporary struggle. But then, Gerard thought of Mikey and his mouth broke the surface for air. 

He sat there for a while, just trying not to think about anything when the bathroom door came open and he screamed before he saw Jason. “Jesus,” he breathed and had a hand on his chest. “I’m sorry,” he laughed a little before resting his head back.

“Well, so much for you relaxing,” Jason said with a little laugh before he walked over to the tub. “Sorry, baby,” he whispered against Gerard’s lips before he kissed them. 

“It’s okay,” Gerard said before he smiled a little bit. He would have been more self conscious if there wasn’t bubbles covering him a bit. There weren’t as many as he would have liked though. “How was work?” 

“It was alright,” Jason smiled. “I missed you though.” Jason started loosening his tie, letting it hang around his neck. “It was stressful.”

“I could help you relax,” Gerard smirked and gently pulled on Jason’s tie, bringing Jason close to him. He figured Jason was hinting for him to help him out and he didn’t want to disappoint him. He still wasn’t completely comfortable but he knew he could just put on his charm, he was good at pretending he was comfortable when he felt sick to his stomach. 

“Well, maybe not in this suit,” Jason said and pulled his tie from Gerard’s wet fingers. “This is a two thousand dollar suit,” he laughed. 

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Gerard said and frowned. “I didn’t mean to,” he felt bad now. 

“Don’t worry about it, babe. We can play later,” Jason said with a grin before he leaned down to kiss Gerard again, but had taken his tie off so it wouldn’t dip into the water. 

Gerard smiled softly into the gentle kisses but jumped when he heard noises in the other room. “Is someone here?” Gerard’s mind instantly went to a scary place where Jason had brought his friends back to use Gerard. 

“Oh, yeah. They’re bringing a gift for Mikey,” Jason said with a smile. “I think he’ll like it and it’ll be helpful for us,” Jason looked excited about it and it made Gerard smile. He was happy to see that Jason was excited to get Mikey something, this was what he wanted for Mikey. 

“Let’s get you out of the tub. We can have a little fun before they get back,” Jason grinned before he stood up and got Gerard a towel. 

The two men who had brought up Mikey’s gift from Jason were walking out of the house when Gerard started whining loudly from the bedroom. They both glanced to each other and raised their eyebrows before they shook their heads and left the apartment.

* * *

“I wish I could stay the night with you,” Mikey said quietly to Frank as they were riding up on the elevator. “I don’t want to go home with Jason. He’s weird,” Mikey said with a groan.

“Oh come on,” Frank smiled. “I’m sure he’s not that bad,” Frank said fairly. Mikey had been subtly and not so subtly voicing his negative opinion of Jason all night. Frank was trying to convince Mikey to give Jason a chance. 

“He’s boring. I don’t know why Gerard likes him,” Mikey admitted and rolled his eyes. 

“If Gerard does like him, you should try to be nice though.” Frank tried to show Mikey that treating Jason badly may be wrong. “Your brother might love him Mikey.” 

“I know,” Mikey pouted a bit and looked down. “But he’s not you.”

Frank glanced over to Mikey once he’d heard him and then knelt down slowly in front of him. “Mikey, I know you wish that Gerard and I were together but Jason’s a good guy. He’s taking care of you both and he doesn’t have to Mikey. He does it because he likes you both. Maybe you could give him a chance?” 

Mikey sighed a little but nodded. “Fine. I just wish Gerard had waited for you to come back.” 

Frank smiled innocently at Mikey. “Can I tell you a secret?” Mikey nodded. “I do too.” 

Mikey smiled at Frank and giggled. “Gerard and Frank, sitting in the tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-G!” Mikey laughed as Frank playfully swatted at him. 

“You said you would keep it a secret!” Frank laughed as Mikey ran down the hall to the door leading to Jason’s apartment. 

“Fine!” Mikey giggled before he knocked on the door. 

Gerard opened the door a moment later in his bathrobe and smiled when he saw Mikey. “Hey, baby,” Gerard smiled before he kissed the top of Mikey’s head and hugged him. “Hey,” Gerard said to Frank with a small smile. 

“Hey,” Frank said and came inside before he closed the door behind him. “He’s eaten,” Frank said nodding to Mikey who was finally letting Gerard go. 

“I’ll be right back. I’m going to go put my pig away,” Mikey said holding up his stuffed animal before he ran down the hall. 

“Thank you, Frank,” Gerard said as he hugged himself. “And about earlier, what I said, it was rude of me. I never meant it like that. Mikey’s just really missed you and I thought-,” Gerard stopped talking when Mikey screamed loudly from his room. 

Frank was running just as fast as Gerard to the end of the hallway where they both stopped in Mikey’s doorway quickly. 

“Mikey, what is wrong?!” Gerard asked breathily as his heart still pounded harshly in his chest. 

Mikey sobbed and pointed to his bed which Gerard finally looked at. He was guessing that this had been Jason’s present to Mikey. The bed was nice but there was one problem, it had shelves underneath it, keeping anything from getting under it. 

“I want my bed!” Mikey screeched before he sobbed. 

Frank didn’t know what was wrong but he didn’t like seeing Mikey so upset. “Excuse me?” Jason said, moving Frank out of the way of the door. Frank stepped back slowly and frowned a bit. 

“What’s wrong?” Jason asked Gerard, having heard Mikey scream from where he was in the shower. 

“You bought him a new bed?” Gerard asked, crossing his arms a little. “Jason, he likes sleeping under his bed sometimes,” Gerard said quietly. “We have to take the shelves out.” 

“I thought we discussed this?” Jason said with a frown, running his fingers through his damp hair with a sigh as Mikey kept crying.

“No, we did not discuss getting him another bed,” Gerard said, knowing he would clearly remember if he had said to get Mikey a new bed or not and if it had been discussed, he would have said no. 

“We discussed him giving up some of his childish behavior. I figured hiding under his bed would be a good one to start with,” Jason said. “Plus the bed wasn’t good for the floor,” Jason said, motioning to a few minor scratches on the wood. 

Gerard sighed weakly before he looked to Mikey. “Mikey...It’ll be okay. You’ll get used to it,” Gerard said, seeming defeated. 

Frank glanced between Jason and Gerard. He was beginning to understand why Mikey didn’t like Jason. Frank didn’t know what it was but Jason seemed controlling, like he was manipulating things but Frank figured his opinion might be biased since he liked Gerard and Mikey so much. 

“No!” Mikey cried and slapped at Gerard’s hand when he reached for him.

“Mikey, don’t hit,” Gerard said with a frown. “I know you’re upset but you can’t act like this.” 

“Get out! Get out!” Mikey screeched and started pushing Gerard and Jason out of the room. They both backed out before Mikey slammed the door. 

There was a little bit of awkward shuffling as Frank, Gerard, and Jason tried getting out of the small hallway. Frank just kind of scratched the back of his neck and went to the door. 

“Frank,” Gerard said with a little sigh as he walked up behind him. “Thank you...for taking Mikey out,” he was trying not to look as sad as he felt but he was failing. 

“Don’t worry about it, any time,” Frank said and he glanced to Jason who was just awkwardly standing behind Gerard, listening and watching them. He shifted and opened the door. “Tell Mikey I said, goodnight.” 

“I will,” Gerard said with a crooked frown. He felt like Frank was judging him for not standing up to Jason for Mikey but he hoped he wasn’t. “Goodnight.”

“Night,” Frank said with a small wave. “Later, Jason,” Frank said before he closed the door. 

Gerard slowly turned to Jason and hugged himself, he couldn’t hide his frown no matter how hard he tried. He had just talked Mikey into trying to like living here a few hours ago and now Jason had upset him more. He was more than a little upset with him at the moment. He had told him that Mikey needed time to adjust and he had taken away one of the things that brought Mikey comfort. It would have helped him feel more comfortable and in time, they could have gotten him the new bed. 

“I really wish you would have discussed this with me,” Gerard said quietly. 

“Gerard, we did discuss this,” Jason sighed and rubbed at his eyes. 

“No, we didn’t!” Gerard shot back. “You can’t just take something that makes him comfortable away. Especially when he’s still getting used to everything,” he explained. “It’s just how Mikey is.” 

“Do not snap at me,” Jason said with a glare. “I can’t deal with this. I have to work in the morning,” he said and held up his hands. He walked to the hall and went into their room before he closed the door a little louder than normal. 

Gerard frowned and looked down before his eyes teared up. There was just too much going on and he was overwhelmed and losing it. He had wanted his life to be like this for so long, had cried so many times believing it would never happen. Now that it was happening, he didn’t think he should be crying again already.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :,(


	28. Chapter 28

Mikey shot up a little from his sleep when he heard a quiet bang somewhere in his room. He was instantly nervous and hugged onto his stuffed pig from where he was curled up on the floor of the closet. He slowly eased himself onto his knees and reached for the handle before he gripped it and cracked open his door. He hesitated before he pressed his eye to the crack so he could see into his room. 

Someone was by his bed, kneeling on the floor, taking out the shelves. He figured it was Gerard at first but then to his surprise, when the person came up from reaching under the bed, it was Jason. He was quietly and carefully removing the boards before he set them over in the corner. Once it was out of the way he took one of Mikey’s blankets from the bed and put it underneath it, like Mikey had had it before the men had put in the new bed. 

Jason stood from the floor and went over, grabbing up the boards so that he could put them in a place that was safe for Mikey. He didn’t want the boy knocking them over onto himself. He walked down the hall and put them in the closet at the end, knowing he would have to move them later. 

Mikey had slowly came out of the closet in his room and crawled across the floor to the bed. He got under it and pressed himself back into the corner with his pig still under his arm. He had dragged the blanket from the closet with him and was no curled up and warm, he was happy. 

Jason had gone back to close Mikey’s door when he saw the closet was open and there was a new blanket sticking out from under the bed. He was going to just close to door but he decided he had to make some peace with Mikey, he wanted the boy to like him. 

Jason came into the room but only a few steps since he heard Mikey make an uncomfortable noise from under the bed at his entrance. “Mikey,” Jason started quietly, bowing his head a little. “Mikey, I’m really sorry that I took your bed away. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable here or upset with me. I just...I don’t have a lot of experience with kids and my parents were so busy working when I was a kid that… I just...I’m not sure how this is supposed to work. All I’ve ever had for an example is how my father raised me and I don’t...I don’t think fondly when he crosses my mind. I don’t want you to hate me, Mikey,” Jason’s voice was quiet but Mikey looked down a little as he heard him, glancing to where he could see Jason’s legs. “So, please, if I’m doing something wrong by you, just tell me, and I’ll fix it,” Jason said, trying to lean a little to see Mikey even the tiniest bit. He saw Mikey’s feet one socked and the other bare, he smiled a little. 

Mikey knew he had told his brother he would try and he could tell that Jason was trying so he knew he had to meet him halfway. “Thank you, Jason,” Mikey squeaked quietly and hugged his pig tighter. 

Jason smiled quite big when Mikey responded to him but tried to contain himself. “Thank _you_ , Mikey,” Jason said fondly. “I hope your appointment goes okay tomorrow. How about I bring home pizza after I get out of work?”

Mikey shifted a little. “I like pizza,” Mikey said quietly, looking more towards Jason now. 

“What kind of your favorite?” Jason asked, slowly squatting down so he could look at Mikey who slowly met his eyes from his place under the bed. 

“I like pepperoni...with extra cheese,” Mikey said quietly as he looked to Jason with a timid smile. 

“Well what about breadsticks?” Jason asked with a smile. Mikey smiled a bit more and nodded his head quickly. “Alright, pizza and breadsticks it is,” Jason hummed with a smile. “Goodnight, Mikey,” he said softly. 

“Night, Jason,” Mikey hummed before he nuzzled into his blankets and gently placed his pig under his head for cushion. He yawned gently as Jason was closing the door. 

Gerard was standing at the end of the hallway waiting for Jason. Gerard had laid himself on the couch for bed and when Jason had gone by, hours later, and into Mikey’s room he had been curious and a little nervous. But now everything was fine, if not better, and Gerard just wanted to kiss Jason for making Mikey feel okay again. 

Jason stopped at the end of the hall when he saw Gerard before him, standing in a baggy shirt and his boxers. “Thank you,” Gerard whispered quietly before he reached forward and wrapped his arms around Jason’s neck, pulling their mouths together. 

Gerard hadn’t planned on his feelings intensifying so much but they had. He was tugging at Jason’s hair and mouthing at his neck as he shimmied out of his own boxers. He pushed down Jason’s sleeping pants, now using both hands, and then gripped his erection, happy to feel him getting hard. 

“Gerard,” Jason purred, his breath slightly catching in his throat. “W-What about Mikey?” Jason asked, nodding his head back towards the hall. 

“You better be quick,” Gerard hummed in a voice that made Jason’s knees weak. With that Gerard turned, letting Jason’s erection go, and walked over to the couch. He bent himself over the back of it, kneeling, and pushed his ass out. “Fuck me,” he breathed and his back was arched in a beautiful curve that made Jason eye him closely. 

“W-We need lube,” Jason said after he’d already let his palms touch the globes of Gerard’s ass, the flesh was warm. “Mm,” Jason hummed before he spread Gerard apart and lapped at him. 

“UH!” Gerard released before he forced his face into the cushions of the couch. He’d never been rimmed before and this was a different experience. “J-Jason…,” he whispered brokenly as he jolted a little when Jason’s tongue went inside him. 

Jason’s tongue worked at Gerard for only a few more minutes before the younger male was pressing back into Jason’s face and fussing. He was opened up beautiful for Jason. He looked down at Gerard’s hole, damp and pink, glimmering a little in the dim room. 

“I’m gonna fuck you,” Jason mumbled in Gerard’s ear, feeling the heat coming from Gerard as he leaned over him. He pressed his dick against Gerard’s ass and grounded against it making Gerard fuss but moan as he slid back and forth over the pucker of Gerard’s hole.

“Please, give me your cock?” Gerard whimpered and he bit onto his bottom lip to stop from whining loudly. He hoped that didn't make him sound like a whore, he figured that he would wait on Jason's response.

“You gonna beg for it?” Jason teased and he pressed his tip in, moaning as Gerard’s hole swallowed him with ease. He had half a mind to slam inside completely when Gerard let out the pathetic little whimpers from his hole being stretched open. He pulled back out, moaning as Gerard gaped for only a second and then tightened back up.

“Please, Jason? I want it so bad,” Gerard whimpered and arched his back a little more.”I’ll do whatever you want me to,” Gerard fused and submissively pushed back and rocked his hips, rubbing at Jason’s cock. 

“What a good boy,” Jason purred before he guided his dick to Gerard’s hole. It was hard for him to slide in so he back up a bit and spat against the hole, making Gerard flinch and then moan. He lined back up and this time, slipped in a little easier. He let out a breathy moan and his head rolled back.

Gerard pressed his warm face into the leather couch cushion and just panted with his mouth open and his eyes closed. He was stretched, he was full, and it felt so good. He felt like he could stay like this forever, Jason buried inside him, and Gerard, all displayed out for him like a good little slut. 

Jason was looking down at Gerard’s ass and he pushed Gerard’s shirt up his body a bit so he could grab at the tops of Gerard’s hips where they curved in. He was enjoying Gerard like this heavily but he did know they had to be quick with Mikey in the other room. So once Gerard had started fussing and grinding back, Jason went for it, fucking into Gerard hard and fast. 

Gerard saw white and black as Jason fucked him good and hard. Everything was hazed over and all he could focus on was Jason’s cock, smashing into his bundle of nerves. He was chewing through his bottom lip, trying to be quiet but he couldn’t stop the constant fussing as Jason fucked into him roughly. 

“Oh, thank you, Jason. Thank you,” Gerard whined as he pressed his sweaty forehead onto the couch. The leather, their sweat, and their sex was all combining and the smell was driving Gerard nuts. 

“You’re so fucking hot,” Jason roughly managed to get out as he thrusted harder and kept burying himself into Gerard. “You love this don’t you?” Jason grumbled into Gerard’s ear before he spanked him, making Gerard yelp and then whimper. Jason could see Gerard’s cock start weeping cum when he spanked him. “Oh, you like it don’t you? You like it, huh?” Jason breathed into Gerard’s neck, feeling Gerard’s hair on his face. He spanked Gerard again and the boy nearly shrieked before sobbing in pleasure.

“Yes, Jason! Yes!" He called and he didn’t know what was happening to him. Gerard had never felt like this, wanted to be fucked like this. Then again, he’d never been fucked by someone who cared for him. It was always men who had paid and he had been forced to sleep with. Now that he could enjoy it and it was his decision, he wanted Jason to fuck him rough and dirty. He was cumming from it.

“I’m gonna make you cum,” Jason growled and Gerard’s whole body shuddered beneath him. “Do you want to cum?” Jason asked and nipped at Gerard’s shoulder. 

“Yes, I do,” Gerard whined and his head was spinning with the pleasure surging through him. Gerard’s forehead rested on the back cushion and his eyes opened, just focusing enough to see all the cum that had been milked from his cock and onto the leather cushion beneath him. 

Jason slipped out of Gerard for a second, making the other boy fuss desperately and try to force his ass back onto Jason’s cock. “Here,” Jason said, gently grabbing Gerard’s arm and having him turn.

Gerard turned like he was commanded, he was laying over the couch properly now but on his front. He moaned when his tip dragged over the leather cushion, covered in his cum. “Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me,” Gerard kept fussing as he could feel the dull pulsing of his prostate, as if Jason was still gently thrusting into him. 

Jason gripped at his base, trying to stop himself from cumming by the sight before him. Gerard was on his knees and his elbows. His body was glittering with sweat and he looked slick and Jason wanted to taste him all over. Gerard’s cock was red and hanging between his legs, a trail of cum connecting the tip to the spackled cushion beneath it. Jason saw Gerard shaking and his face was flushed and he was panting, he then let out a little moan when he saw Jason looking him over, and a little more cum followed down the trail from Gerard’s tip to the couch. 

Jason ran his hand over Gerard’s back since his shirt was now bunched up under his arms, revealing his pale back. “Here ya go, baby,” Jason breathed before fully burying himself inside Gerard who instantly tensed and arched, his head coming back, lifting up.

“Ah! Oh,” Gerard whined a little louder than intended and he felt like sobbing because Jason had given him back his cock and it felt so nice to be full again. 

Before Jason could even start thrusting Gerard was desperately rocking, fucking himself on Jason’s cock. “Oh, fuck, baby,” Jason moaned and gave Gerard a small slap on his ass, making the other cry out and bounce harder. 

Gerard was close and Jason could tell by how focused he was on fucking himself on Jason’s cock. He had his head down, forehead resting against where he had brought his hands together on the couch. His elbows were pressed down into the cushion to help his leverage and he would let out these desperate moans every so often when he’d hit his spot just right. 

Jason grabbed a hold of his hips and thrusted forward when Gerard began tapping his spot repeatedly, making the boy nearly shriek and then he was cumming. He was squirming and crying out and he was covering the cushion beneath him with his cum.

Jason buried himself inside Gerard with a half a dozen more thrusts, each making the boy whine loudly from being over sensitive before he came, buried deep inside him. 

Gerard fussed but moaned, feeling the load filling him. He laid completely still until Jason had finished and collapsed on top of him. He whimpered quietly as his cock was pressed into the leather cushion with his cum.

“I’m sorry,” Jason said quietly as he panted and tried to bring himself up from Gerard, not wanting to hurt him. 

“No,” Gerard said quietly and grabbed his wrist gently that was resting beside his head. “It’s okay. It feels good when you lay on me like that,” he quietly confessed. “I feel safe.”

Jason smiled gently and ran his fingers through Gerard’s hair on the back of his head. He smiled a little more at how messy it was now. He gently wrapped his arms around Gerard before he laid back down like they had before. 

“You’re perfect,” he breathed against Gerard’s ear before he kissed it. 

Gerard smiled big and blushed a little before he turned his head a little and kissed Jason. He nuzzled closer to him on the couch before he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry about the wait! Things have been crazy at home and at work! I'm hoping to get some extra writing done this weekend so that things can be updated more frequently. I hope everyone's been doing good.


	29. Chapter 29

Gerard had woken up in bed with his boxers back on and cleaned up. He had thought it was sweet of Jason to put him back into bed. There had also been a note left, wishing them luck on Mikey’s appointment, money, and Jason telling Gerard he would miss him all day. 

Gerard thought over the night before and blushed at himself for how he had acted but Jason seemed to have liked it. He just prayed that Mikey hadn’t heard any of it. Gerard walked out of the bedroom, knowing Mikey had to be up soon for his appointment. He was thinking about how he was going to wake Mikey up when he saw him sitting at the bar in the kitchen. He was eating his cereal and watching the small television on the counter. Gerard smiled a little as he heard Mikey’s cartoons.

He silently walked up to his little brother and ran his hand over Mikey’s forehead and cap before he pressed a gentle kiss to his forehead. “Morning, babe,” Gerard whispered before he sat himself beside Mikey in the stool next to his. “Did you sleep okay?” Gerard asked, gently grabbing Mikey’s hand to hold in his. 

“Yeah,” Mikey said with a small smile at his older brother. He took another bite of his cereal and glanced back to the television. 

“Are you ready for your appointment?” Gerard asked quietly, leaning in a little, hoping to catch Mikey’s gaze. Mikey nodded silently and kept eating his cereal. “Mikey, baby… Are you okay?” Mikey nodded again and looked into his cereal bowl. “Talk to me,” Gerard started commanding but found himself pleading. “You always talk to me. What is it?” 

“Can I go see Frank soon?” Mikey asked, not looking up from his bowl. “I miss him a lot,” Mikey said quietly. 

Gerard frowned softly and rubbed at Mikey’s back. “I miss him too, baby,” Gerard confessed. “Maybe we can call him and he’ll meet up with us for lunch. Would that be fun?” Mikey smiled a little more and nodded. “Okay, I’ll go hop in the shower and then I’ll call him, okay?” Mikey nodded again and he looked okay but Gerard didn’t like how quiet Mikey was being. He hadn’t said much since Gerard had spoke to him and it wasn’t like Mikey. He also didn’t crawl into Gerard’s lap or try to be close to him like normal. “I love you,” Gerard whispered, quietly to Mikey.

“I love you too,” Mikey said back but only in the form of it being a routine, not with any meaning. 

“Do you?” Gerard questioned quietly, watching his little brother’s eyes that were fixed on the television screen. Mikey only nodded his head and slurped more of his milk. 

Gerard just nodded before going into the bathroom to get ready.

* * *

Mikey's doctor had requested twice the normal amount of blood work. This made Gerard nervous and he held onto Mikey's other hand as the nurse took eight vials from his little brother. They had had a hard time finding Mikey's vein and had ended up fishing for a while. Mikey had silent tears running down his face but had sat still. Gerard wanted to hit the nurse for hurting his little brother so badly but he knew it wasn't her fault. She wasn't the only nurse to have trouble with getting Mikey's blood. 

They were both quiet as they sat in the room now, neither offering up anything to break the silence. Then there was a knock that nearly startled Gerard before the doctor came in. 

"Alright," he said before coming over to Mikey. "How are we feeling, bud?" 

"Okay," Mikey said weakly. "How are you?" 

"Good," the doctor said with a little chuckle. He took his stethoscope from around his neck and placed it in his ears. Without even being asked Mikey started his deep breathes the second it was placed on his chest. 

"Little raspy," the doctor commented. "You been eating regularly?" Mikey nodded and when the doctor looked to Gerard for confirmation he nodded too. "Well, good. You've gained 5 pounds since your last appointment." He said with a smile. 

He sat himself down on his chair and opens Mikey's file. "Alright, I ordered extra blood work because we had some iffy test results. Now I'm not saying there's a problem, just that we want to be sure that there isn't. " 

Gerard forced himself not to get nervous or too worried but he could feel the lump building in his throat, he was making himself breath through it. 

"But I would like to see him back in two weeks instead of a month this time.just want to keep on top of it," he added and wrote something down in Mikey's file. "Any questions?" 

Both brothers shook their heads in unison with the same glum look. The doctor frowned and looked to them both. "Everything is going to be okay. I don't want you to worry. Alright?" They both nodded again. "Also, Gerard, good job on getting his weight up. You're taking really good care of him." The doctor said. He knew how badly Gerard needed the reassurance, especially from him. When Gerard and Mikey's parents had died, he had suggested trying to get Gerard to give Mikey up. Gerard had refuses and nearly swapped doctors. 

"I'll see you both next time," he said before leaving.

* * *

"Why are we going to the park?" Mikey asked with a frown. "I'm tired. I want to go home," Mikey said miserably. 

"But aren't you forgetting something?" Gerard said with a little smile when Mikey looked to him confused. He nodded his head forward so Mikey would look. 

Mikey looked up and saw Frank walking towards them with a bag over his shoulder. "Frank!" Mikey screamed happily before he ran to him and jumped into his arms. 

Gerard smiled a bit more and walked up to them. "Hey, you," Frank said with a smile at Gerard. "I brought a picnic," he motioned to the bag. "Thanks for inviting me," he smiled and rubbed Mikey's back. 

"Thanks for coming," Gerard said with a smile. "He missed you." Gerard motioned to Mikey. Gerard had wanted to say, ' _we missed you,' but he didn't know if he could._

"Well, I missed you both too," Frank said with a smile as he set Mikey down finally. "How have you been, bud?" Frank asked Mikey. "How'd your appointment go?" 

"It was okay," Mikey said with a shrug. "They had to take my blood," Mikey said with a frown. 

"Aw," Frank said and frowned. "I'm sorry." 

"It's okay. Did you bring chips?" Mikey asked, nearly crawling into the bag Frank had. 

"Yeah, your favorite," Frank said and pulled out the bag for Mikey. 

Mikey held the bag up like a trophy and smiled before he grabbed up the blanket from the bag and walked over to the grass, finding a shady spot. 

"Thank you," Gerard said quietly to Frank. "You're really great with him," Gerard said, walking next to Frank, headed for the blanket. Gerard was ignoring how badly he wanted to be with Frank, like this. He was good with Mikey and he was sweet. Hell, he had saved Gerard's life and wanted nothing in return. All these thoughts were flooding Gerard’s mind as he was finally spending some time with Frank again.

"Nah. I just bring chips," Frank said with a bashful smile. 

"His _favorite_ chips," Gerard corrected with a smile as Mikey was sitting on the blanket, happily eating his chips. 

Frank smiled a bit as he sat down with Mikey and took the bag off from over his head. Gerard sat beside him and crossed his legs.

* * *

When lunch had been finished and put away Mikey had seen one of his friends and had wanted to play. Frank had gone with him at first since he was shy and Gerard enjoyed watching. Frank would run around with the kids at their speed and he would stay close to Mikey and keep an eye on him. 

Frank was coming over to Gerard now and breathing heavy with a big smile on his face. He dropped down and laid himself on the blanket as he panted. 

"They were trying to kill me and you just watched!" Frank playfully accused with a huff of laughter. 

"I knew I couldn't save you. There was no point in us both going down,' Gerard joked with a smile down at Frank. 

"Ah, alright," Frank laughed. "Fair enough," he hummed before propping himself up on his elbow, his head close to Gerard's arm. 

They sat for a moment and just watched the kids running around. "Hey, how did his appointment go?" Frank asked after a moment, just remembering to ask Gerard. 

Gerard didn't speak for a moment, he just watched his brother playing. "They found something off in his blood work...They say we shouldn't be worried though...not until the tests come back," Gerard said with a small huff after, he glanced down to the ground in front of him. 

"But you are... How could you not be?" Frank asked quietly. He sat himself up now, close to Gerard. He saw the saddened look on his features and he reached over and rubbed his back. 

Gerard found himself crying and he just kept his head down, not wanting Mikey to see. "I don't want him to know how scared I am," Gerard breathed with a small cry. "But I can't just act like everything is normal when he could be sick again. Frank," Gerard cried and his watering eyes met Frank’s whose were misty and it almost surprised Gerard to see Frank being emotional with him when most men wouldn't. "I don't want to lose him," Gerard finished brokenly. 

"I know," Frank whispered quietly before he pulled Gerard into him a little for comfort. "I'm not going to tell you not to be scared because I know that's impossible but we have to stay positive for Mikey," he said quietly. "Even if, God forbid, it does come back...You've done a great job getting him healthy. He can fight it," Frank told Gerard comfortably. 

Gerard looked to Frank and he really wished that he was his because he wanted to kiss him but he knew that he couldn't so he looked down. "I just hope that I can too," Gerard whispered before he wiped at his eyes and forced a smile to Mikey who was running up to them.

* * *

Gerard got home with Mikey just a few moment before Jason arrived with the pizza. Gerard turned and smiled, he felt like he had been out cheating on Jason now. He looked down and bit his lip a little at the thought. 

"Hey baby," Jason hummed before he pressed a kiss to Gerard's mouth. "How'd the appointment go?" He asked as he turned to set the pizza on the counter. 

"They...They said they found something in his blood...they took a lot more today for testing," Gerard said with a frown. "They said we shouldn't worry but...," Gerard frowned and shrugged before his eyes watered a little. "I am," he said, his voice breaking a little. He looked down and sniffled. 

"Gerard, if the Doctor says not to worry then why get worked up?" Jason said with a little sigh and a frown. 

"How can I not worry?" Gerard asked in partial disbelief, now looking to Jason. He couldn’t believe this was Jason’s excuse. He knew he shouldn’t dwell on it but it had only been a few hours and he was seeking comfort. Part of him was hoping Jason would be as good at comforting him as Frank was. He needed this to know things were right. 

"There's no point. It's not a big deal until the doctor says it is," Jason sighed, trying to show Gerard his reasoning and that Gerard was overreacting. 

Gerard couldn't believe what he was hearing and shook his head before he went to walk by Jason who grabbed his arm and stopped him. 

"Let me go," Gerard snapped and tried to roughly pull away before he felt his head jerk back and a pain in his cheek. He cried out in pain and held his face. 

"Baby, baby I'm sorry," Jason said quickly and gently pulled Gerard into him who was crying and holding his face. "You just...why'd you have to make me mad?" 

"You asshole!" Gerard cried and tried pulling away but he felt more pain where Jason was gripping his wrists. "You can't just fucking hit me!" Gerard nearly shouted. 

"Or what?! You'll leave me?" Jason asked and laughed. "Fine, go live on the street. I'll call the state on you so fast Mikey will be taken from you before you step out of the lobby," Jason threatened. 

"W-We'll go stay with Frank until I find a place," Gerard tried but his timid voice only showed how scared he was. He knew it didn’t help that he couldn’t look Jason in the eye when he said it.

"You think he'll take in someone like you? Remember how you were last night? You're not just a slut at work," Jason laughed. “Unless,” Jason said, seeming like he was realizing something. “Have you been slutting it up with him!?” 

“No!” Gerard looked down and his eyes watered as Jason talked. "And last night...It wasn't like that, I just...-"

"Begged for my cock like the biggest slut I've ever seen?" Jason interrupt and Gerard let out a little cry, letting Jason know that he was winning. 

"Gerard? Is everything okay?" Came Mikey's small voice from behind them. 

"Yeah, Gerard? Is everything, okay?" Jason asked, quirking his eyebrows. 

Gerard wiped his eyes and nodded. "Yeah, baby. Everything's fine," Gerard said, forcing a smile even though he felt so sick inside. 

"Is there pizza?" Mikey asked with a smile, looking to the box on the counter. 

"Yeah, bud," Jason said with a smile. "I couldn't break a promise now could I?" 

Jason grabbed the box and went to the table with it. Mikey went to follow him before he stopped next to Gerard. "I guess you're right, Gee. He's not so bad," Mikey said with a smile before he went to the table to get his pizza. Gerard felt like he was going to die.

* * *

Gerard was laying in bed with an ice pack to his cheek when he felt Jason crawl in behind him. Gerard chose not to speak and just laid still until he felt a hand dragging down his boxers. 

"Not tonight," Gerard said, rolling so Jason couldn't pull his boxers down. 

"Listen to how this is going to work," Jason said before he ripped the ice pack from Gerard's hand and threw it to the floor. He crawled on top of him and pinned Gerard's arms down roughly when he tried to protest. 

"You'll do what I say or I'll kick you out and you'll lose your brother," Jason said like it was no big deal. Gerard felt his eyes watering as his life was becoming more of a nightmare than it ever had been. "Understand?" 

Gerard cried and turned his face away before he was slapped and Jason roughly gripped his jaw. "Do you understand!?" He nearly shouted, reducing Gerard to tears and quiet whines before he nodded. "Good." 

Jason reached down and pulled Gerard's boxers down making the younger male cry more and put up a small protest. He rolled Gerard onto his front and pinned his face down to the mattress when he started fighting more. 

Gerard cried as his aching face was roughly pushed against the mattress. He didn't want to think about what was going to happen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ... Poor Gerard


	30. Chapter 30

"Gee?" Mikey asked quietly as he saw his brother sitting on the counter, staring out the window at the city. He had a cup of coffee in his hand but he hadn't sipped it for a while. "Are you okay?" Mikey asked innocently. 

"Oh...yeah," Gerard said, finally pulling out of his heavy thoughts. 

"What happened to your cheek?" Mikey asked with a frown before he crawled up onto the counter and then into his brother's lap. 

"I fell in the shower," Gerard said quietly but pulled a goofy face for Mikey. 

"I'm sorry," Mikey said before he kissed his brothers bruised cheek. He hummed contently after and nuzzled into his brother's neck. He looked out the window at the big city with Gerard. 

"I like it here," Mikey said with a small smile. "I like Jason too. We watched cartoons last night and he said he has Netflix and I can watch them all the time!" 

Gerard nodded a little with a small smile that he forced. He knew he couldn't leave now, like he had been contemplating. Mikey was happy and Gerard had promised himself that he would do whatever to make him happy. 

Gerard had been moments from calling Frank and begging him to come get them while Jason was at work but he knew he couldn't now. 

"You're really happy?" Gerard asked, hoping Mikey may change his mind. 

"Yeah," Mikey said, trying to make his older brother happy. He knew how much he liked Jason and if Gerard liked it here then he could too.

It was settled in Gerard's mind, they would stay. As long as Mikey was happy and cared for, his needs didn't matter.

* * *

Gerard was in the kitchen cooking dinner when he heard the door unlock itself and open. He found himself tensing as he heard Jason set down his briefcase and start walking up behind him. He bit his bottom lip and looked down to the pan in front of him. 

Jason's arm came around him and he flinched before he saw flowers and he smiled a little. He turned his face to Jason's and then he kissed him gently. 

"I'm sorry," Jason whispered and kissed Gerard's bruised cheek gently. 

"It's okay," Gerard forced out before he placed a smile on his face, a small one. 

"Hey Jason!" Mikey called as he ran into the kitchen. 

"Hey, bud," Jason said with a smile. "How is Batman and Robin doing today?" Jason said as he could hear the television playing. 

"Good," Mikey said with a smile. "Wanna come watch it with me?" 

"Heck, yeah," Jason said with a huge smile and followed Mikey into the living room. 

Gerard smiled a little as he went to get a vase he'd seen up in the cupboard. Maybe thing could be okay for them? It could work out if Gerard just let it, that's what he told himself.

* * *

Gerard had made plans to take Mikey out to see Frank again, It had been a few days and his bruise was mostly gone, he could cover it with makeup at least. He sat on the counter in the bathroom, applying concealer. 

“I just don’t see why you both have to go,” Jason said, standing in the doorway of the bathroom. “It’s my day off, you should be spending it with me,” Jason tried, guilting Gerard a little. 

“I know, babe but Mikey really misses him,” Gerard said with a frown. “It won’t be long. Just a few hours. We’re just getting lunch,” Gerard added, trying to convince Jason that it would be fine. 

“You know that bill came from when you were in the hospital…,” Jason said, purposely pausing for Gerard’s attention. “It was a pretty big one,” he added, looking to his nails. “I paid that for you,” he purred, his voice coming out like poison to make Gerard feel sick to his stomach. 

Gerard turned a little and looked to Jason. “M-Maybe I could come back? Just drop off Mikey,” Gerard said, knowing he couldn’t go after Jason had paid his bill for him, it didn’t feel right. 

“Why doesn’t Frank just come and pick him up? That’d be better,” Jason said with a tone that made Gerard’s hair stand up on his arms. 

“I’ll call him and ask,” Gerard said before he cautiously walked around Jason, not sure of him. He hadn’t hurt Gerard in the last few days but that one night was still fresh in Gerard’s mind. How Jason had pinned him down and forced inside of him. 

Gerard listened to his phone ring a few times before Frank picked up with a warm, greeting. Gerard ignored how his eyes felt like they were going to water as he had to tell Frank he couldn’t go with them. He wanted to go so badly. He wanted to get away from Jason’s gaze, even if only for a few hours. He was scared to be alone with him. 

“Hey. I was just calling to ask if you could come pick up Mikey? I’m just not feeling too well and I know how excited he is to go. I don’t want to upset him,” Gerard tried to sound convincing. 

“Yeah, sure. That’s fine. I’ll swing by, maybe in a few minutes?” Frank said, seeming to sound disappointed and Gerard was secretly hoping it was because he couldn’t come. 

“Okay. See you then,” Gerard said with a little smile before he hung up. At least he would get to see Frank. 

The second Gerard’s phone hung up and he set it down he blacked out for a moment and when his eyes opened again he was laying on the floor by the bed. He blinked lazily as his head span and he saw Jason standing at his feet looking angered and with a wild look in his eye, he was holding the hairdryer Gerard had been using. Gerard whined as his head was spinning and he brought his hand up to touch his temple where the pain was the worst. He pulled his hand away and saw blood covering his fingers, he cried harder. 

“You can’t tell him that you just want to spend time with me? You have to act like you’re sick?” Jason harped angrily and Gerard tried to register what he was saying. 

“N-No...I,” Gerard started but Jason was grabbing him up and he concentrated on getting his feet under him. 

“You what?!” Jason barked before he shoved Gerard and he slammed against the wall, only managing to stay standing by using the nightstand to keep himself up.

“J-Jason, please?” Gerard breathed out in a scared tone. 

Jason blinked and paced a bit before he seemed to calm. “B-Baby...I ...I didn’t mean to,” Jason said sadly and slowly walked up to Gerard who was physically shaking and tears poured from his eyes as he was frightened.

Gerard yelped from fear when Jason wrapped him in his arms and held him closely. “I’m sorry, baby,” he whispered and held Gerard tight, too tight. Gerard still had tears pouring from his eyes but he forced himself to hug Jason back out of fear of him lashing out again. 

“You just make me so angry sometimes,” Jason said with a small sigh and shook his head.

“I-I’m sorry,” Gerard squeaked out, his arms still shaking. 

“I don’t like hurting you but you do and say stuff like that and I can’t help it. Especially when I know that I just paid that huge bill and you’d rather spend time with some charity case,” Jason said to Gerard, his tone getting a little heated when he mentioned Frank in the slightest. 

“N-No,” Gerard said, trying to keep his voice from wavering. “I want to stay home with you,” Gerard lied and forced himself to nuzzle into Jason. “I’m sorry I made you mad,” he whimpered and flinched when Jason’s hand gently brushed through his hair. 

“It’s okay. If you do better I won’t have to hurt you anymore,” Jason said with a little smile. “Alright? Understand?” Gerard nodded the best he could and sniffled softly as he looked into Jason’s eyes. “I love you, baby.”

Gerard wanted to puke at the thought but he forced himself to look at Jason sincerely. He closed his eyes for a moment and just pictured Frank. “I love you too,” he whispered but when he opened his eyes and saw Jason before him again he found himself crying harder.

“Aw, baby. Don’t cry,” Jason cooed. “It’ll be okay,” Jason said as he rubbed Gerard’s back. 

There was a knock at the door to the apartment and Gerard looked to the bedroom door, like somehow he would be saved but then Jason pulled away from him. 

“Now you stay here and clean yourself up,” Jason said, pulling away. “I’ll make sure Mikey has everything and get him on his way. Go relax and take a warm bath, babe.” 

Gerard wanted to sob and scream for Frank to hear him, for someone to hear him. He was in so much pain and he was so scared, he didn’t want to be around Jason anymore but his thoughts went to Mikey and he simply bowed his head and nodded. He couldn’t risk being kicked out, especially when Mikey might be getting sick again, Gerard would be unable to keep Mikey, he would lose him. That was something that would hurt worse than Jason’s beatings. Plus, it had been a few days since the last once and Jason had been okay in those few days. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad?

Jason walked out of the room and shut the door before Gerard heard him go to the door. “Oh, hey,” came Frank’s voice, sounding surprised to see Jason. “Gerard home?” 

Gerard slowly walked over to the bedroom door before he sat himself down in front of it and pressed his burning temple to the cool wood. He wanted to be as close to Frank as possible, he wanted him so badly right now. 

“Yes but he laid down. He’s got some sort of stomach virus,” Jason said back and Frank seemed to hum a response. 

"Well, I hope he's okay. I know he's been a little nervous since Mikey's appointment," Frank said, his tone a bit sad. 

Gerard brought his hand up to the door and pressed it against the wood. He was praying for Frank to want to see him, to just come in here and save him so he didn’t have to be the one. He couldn’t leave, not now. He would lose his brother but he hoped that if Frank saw him in this state he would take them in and care for them. 

Gerard couldn’t believe that the pain in his heart was worse than the physical pain in his head. He had realized when he had told Jason, when he had pretended that Jason was Frank, that Gerard was in love with the other male. Gerard had never been in love before and knowing he couldn’t have Frank pulled at him painfully. 

It had taken Gerard more time to admit it to himself than for him to actually do it because as he was sitting on the floor in his boyfriend's expensive apartment, he realized he had loved Frank for far longer than he could have imagined. He remembered back to Frank coming to him when Mikey had run off. How he had held onto Gerard and helped him think. That had been it, that had been when Gerard had fallen for Frank way harder than anyone should ever fall for another person. But someone had cared and it had been so long since that had happened to Gerard.

Gerard heard Mikey come out and ask for him but Jason said that he was sick. Gerard wanted Mikey to come for him, to come tell him goodbye but he didn’t want his little brother to see him like this. He prayed he wouldn’t, even though he so badly wanted to be found. 

“He’s asleep, bud,” Jason said and Gerard could nearly see the stupid pout on his lips. “But I’ll tell him, okay?”

“Alright,” Mikey said. “Bye, Jason.”

“Bye,” Frank called and the door closed shut, seeming to lock Gerard inside. 

They were leaving. They were going to leave Gerard here alone with this sick man that had once appeared to be sweet. Gerard cried more out of fear as he heard the door shut and he knew he was in fact alone with Jason. He forced himself up and into the bathroom, he quickly started drawing the bath that Jason told him to take, not wanting to upset him. 

Gerard stood by the bathtub for sometime, just watching it fill up. He didn’t want to undress himself, he didn’t want to be naked and waiting for Jason to come in for him. But as he was thinking this, he jumped when Jason came up behind him and ran a hand over his chest. “Let’s get you undressed,” Jason breathed against Gerard’s ear and the younger male shuddered as he cried.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took so long! I hope it won't ever take this long again! 
> 
> Work has been crazy but I think most of it is over! I have been working 45-60 hour weeks the last month and a half and that has worn me out immensely and doesn't leave me much time to write like I wish. 
> 
> But here is the next chapter, please tell me what you think! And also, what you've all been up to!


	31. Chapter 31

It had been a week since Jason had hit Gerard with the hairdryer and forced him out of his clothes and into the tub. Things had been mostly calm besides small comments that Jason would make. Gerard was feeling very insecure in himself even though he knew he shouldn’t. But this was the man who took care of him, who was supposed to love him. Gerard was starting to believe all of what Jason was doing, was truly something he deserved. 

Gerard tried to push last night out of his head as he was standing in the kitchen, cooking dinner for Mikey and Jason. It was coming in waves, splashing him with reminders. How he had been in bed, riding Jason after they spent the whole night cuddling and watching TV. Jason had wrapped his hands around Gerard’s hips as he bounced but soon Gerard realized Jason was growing soft and Gerard had tilted his head forward and looked to him.

Gerard had asked him what was wrong and tried to be affectionate with him but Jason had kind of shrugged him off. It took a little while before Jason admitted, seeming reluctant, that he thought Gerard was getting fat and that he couldn’t help himself but to sometimes think about how so many men had been inside of Gerard. 

Gerard’s eyes watered a little even now as he stood in the kitchen, remembering back. He looked down at his body and gently touched his side, feeling his ribs that still protruded uncomfortably but to him felt like they were hidden behind layers of fat. Then he thought about how used up he was and how grateful he was to Jason for even bringing him into his home. 

Gerard would have never believed he would be like this before but now, it was all he could think of. Jason’s small comments throughout the week were leaving him feeling worthless and inferior. He told himself he would definitely cut back on eating. He had been so embarrassed when Jason had gone soft just by the sight of him. They had managed to finish but not with Gerard on top. Gerard had laid on his belly and pushed his ass up for Jason, just wanting Jason to touch him again, and make him feel like maybe he was a little less worthless for giving himself to someone who was technically his boyfriend. 

“Dinner smells great, babe,” Jason said quietly and pulled Gerard into his arms. He gently rested his chin on Gerard’s shoulder before placing a gentle kiss on the back of Gerard’s head. He hummed softly and rocked Gerard in his arms. “I hope you’re not mad at me about last night,” Jason whispered, sounding sad. “I love you, you know?”

Gerard nodded softly and forced a sad smile onto his lips. “I-I know. I just...I wish I could be better for you,” Gerard said sadly as he looked to the pan in front of him. 

“I know you do and you will be. I’ll just have to get over how many men have slept with you,” Jason said with a small sigh. “I’m trying. You have to know that,” Jason hummed. 

“I know,” Gerard squeaked out sadly. 

“It wouldn’t just be me. Other men would feel the same, babe,” Jason said quietly. 

“Frank didn’t,” Gerard dared to whisper as he looked sadly to the pan. A little bit of fight was bubbling up, telling him that this was just Jason, that there was nothing wrong with him. 

Jason pulled back and Gerard tensed, scared of being hit. “Frank never had to sleep with your nasty ass either,” Jason spat. “Bet he never even saw you naked. Fuck, I bet he never even tried fucking you. You used up slut,” Jason bitterly said before he walked back towards the living room, shaking his head. 

Gerard’s eyes watered at Jason’s words and then it really set in and then tears slipped from his eyes. Frank had never tried to sleep with him. Frank had left every time it had been offered to him and even the night he had stayed over, he hadn’t touched Gerard in anyway that could be considered sexual. Gerard looked down and closed his eyes before he let out a quiet sob, not wanting Mikey to hear him. 

This hurt more than anything Jason was doing to him because he was realizing that the person he was in love with, didn’t want him. That he hadn’t tried sleeping with Gerard because he had known all along what Jason was telling him. Gerard was a slut.

* * *

“Aren’t you going to come, Gerard?” Mikey asked quietly as his older brother was helping him put on his coat and his hat. Gerard had been quiet through dinner and hadn’t eaten much. Even when he had tucked Mikey in he just looked so sad but he had said he was still sick. 

“No. I don’t need to come with you,” Gerard said quietly as he put on Mikey’s gloves. Winter had finally kicked in full swing. It had held off and been pretty mild for the beginning to November but now the snow had finally come. Frank was finally going to take Mikey tubing like he had promised. 

“I know but I want you to,” Mikey said quietly, he felt like his older brother was upset with him or something. He wasn’t talking to him as much anymore and it seemed like he didn’t want very much affection. 

“I can’t change my mind now. I told Frank I wasn’t coming,” Gerard said blandly before he put on Mikey’s scarf. 

“He misses you,” Mikey said quietly and looked down a little. 

“Well, I don’t miss him,” Gerard snapped a little before he stood up and went to get Mikey a thicker hat. 

“Liar,” Mikey muttered.

“Excuse me?” Gerard said, rounding on Mikey and placing his hands on his hips. 

“You do too miss him!” Mikey countered. “Even if you’re Jason’s boyfriend, you can still be friend with Frank,” Mikey said with a frown. 

“I don’t want to be,” Gerard snipped again before putting on Mikey’s hat.

Mikey was about to tell his older brother something before there was a knock on the door. Gerard stood up quickly and unlocked it before he pulled it open, he wasn’t ready for what he saw. There was Frank, all bundled up and cute with a small hat on, waving at him but there was a girl, and she was cute. Her brown hair was under a hat and it looked soft and it was shiny. Her makeup was cute and she was pretty, so pretty, Gerard tried to regain himself.

“Oh, you brought a friend,” Gerard said with a small smile even with his heart in two piece, laying on the bottom of his stomach. 

“Yeah, Gerard, this is Ayla,” Frank said, motioning to her. 

“Ayla, that’s a different name,” Gerard said, forcing himself to be nice to this new girl. 

“My mother, she’s Turkish,” Ayla said. Gerard nodded at this and figured that was why she seemed to look a little different but it only made her even more strikingly gorgeous. Gerard was beginning to hate her. “It’s nice to meet you. I’ve heard all about you, Gerard,” she said with a bright, white smile, sticking out her hand.

“That’s strange. Frank’s never mentioned you,” Gerard shot back but forced a polite smile and shook her hand. 

She stepped back a little and looked down with a small frown, Gerard instantly felt bad. He couldn’t be the type of person who picked on others, it brought him too much pain. “But I’m sure that’s only because I’ve been so busy. I haven’t seen him in weeks,” Gerard tried to recover. 

“Oh,” she said, now smiling a little and nodding. Gerard felt a little better but he did see Frank giving him a look and he glanced downward, knowing Frank wasn’t overly pleased with Gerard’s phrasing. 

“Speaking of which,” Frank said, choosing to step in. “How’s your cold?” 

“Oh, it’s not quite gone yet. Few more days I hope,” Gerard said turning from Frank and looking to Mikey. He knew part of his cheek was still swollen from where Jason had slapped him last night. He had already figured that mentioning Frank would earn him a slap. He had covered it with makeup though. 

“Well, I hope you feel better. We miss having you come hang out with us,” Frank said with a little frown but he gave Mikey a little smile. 

“Yeah,” Mikey said quietly and frowned a little.

“Hey, now,” Gerard whispered and knelt down a little. “You go with Frank and Ayla and have fun, okay? Next week, when I feel better, we’ll all go out and do something, okay?” Gerard tried, wanting his little brother to be happy. 

“Okay,” Mikey said quietly before he kissed his brother's cheek. “I love you,” Mikey mumbled into Gerard’s shoulder as he hugged him. 

“I love you too,” Gerard whispered. “Be safe,” he whispered into his ear.

“I will. Always,” Mikey said with a little smile before he gripped Gerard tighter and then let him go. 

“Alright, bud,” Frank said and Mikey smiled before going out into the hall with Ayla, heading to go press the button on the elevator. 

“I hope it’s okay that she’s coming,” Frank said quietly, sort of asking. 

“It’s fine,” Gerard said, trying to seem indifferent as he hugged himself. “I know you wouldn’t bring anyone bad around Mikey.” 

“Well...get better because...I’ve missed you,” Frank said with a shy, little smile. 

“Don’t you think that’s a little inappropriate with your girlfriend in the hall?” Gerard shot back with a little glare. 

“W-Wha...Why is it inappropriate to miss you? You’re my friend,” Frank said, his features showing just how confused he was with Gerard’s sudden bitterness. “Don’t you miss me?” Frank asked, looking as vulnerable as ever.

“Not really,” Gerard said with a shrug. “Why would I? My life is perfect now and I don’t need your help anymore. I was just keeping you around for backup,” Gerard snapped bitterly before he crossed his arms. It felt like now all this hostility was building up and piling against him, making him angry at Frank. How could he bring that girl here when Gerard was already so upset and sensitive? Not that Frank knew that but in Gerard’s mind, it was like Frank had done it on purpose. 

“B-Backup?” Frank said, his face even more confused. “Oh, come on. Don’t act like you have no feelings for me. Gerard, we’ve been through too much together for you to act like that,” Frank said with a frown. He didn’t want to think Gerard had faked it all. It was crushing him to even linger on the thought. Gerard couldn’t have faked all those hugs and the night they had stayed curled up together, could he? Though, it seemed that when Gerard was angry with Frank, he told him this each time, he was worried it was true.

“Why do you care?! You show up here with some stupid, fucking girl on your arm and act like I should have feelings for you!?” Gerard shouted and then he realized what all this boiled down to, jealousy. Here was this beautiful girl who wasn’t some prostitute that had slept around to get by. She looked like she was some rich, college grad kid and she wanted Frank. How could Gerard ever get him when he was so worthless? 

“Gerard…,” Frank said calmly, frowning. “It’s not like that,” he admitted. “I just...I mean you’re with Jason and I thought...I thought that’s what you wanted?” Frank asked, looking up from the ground and at Gerard, trying to hold his gaze, only for Gerard to look away. 

“It is. You know what, get the fuck out of here! Mikey, come here!” Gerard shouted and Mikey walked back into the apartment, looking confused. “You’re not going with Frank, go get undressed.”

“But Gee I-,” Mikey tried.

“Go to your room!” Gerard snapped and Mikey frowned and his eyes watered before he did, sadly looking to Frank. 

“Gerard, please don’t take this out on him?” Frank begged and looked to Gerard. 

“He’s not yours to fucking raise! You don’t get a say in what I do with my little brother! Just get out!” Gerard shouted before he shoved Frank back and towards the open door. 

“Gerard, don’t do this?” Frank begged and his eyes were watering a little. “I don’t want to lose you guys,” Frank said sadly and he seemed like he was trying to breath through a lump in his throat as Gerard pushed him further out the door and into the hall. 

“We were never yours!” Gerard shouted before he went to slam the door.

“But...Gerard…,” Frank tried, his eyes now leaking. “I love you,” he said sadly, hoping Gerard wouldn’t push him out of their lives. Frank really did love Gerard and he loved Mikey, he didn’t want to be without them, to be alone again.

Gerard hesitated for a moment before Jason’s words were playing in his head and he frowned, he slammed the door closed and locked it before he rested his forehead against it and cried softly, bringing his face into his hands. 

“Sh, Frank,” Gerard heard Ayla whispering quietly through the door as Frank sniffled quietly. 

“That’s the guy you wanted me to meet?” She asked almost in disbelief. “Jesus, Frankie, you’re hopeless when it comes to love,” she tried, sounding playful but Frank only cried harder. “Alright, let’s go home.” 

Gerard pressed himself against the door and closed his eyes tightly, he felt his stomach churning. Frank had brought her here to meet Gerard because, clearly, Frank talked about him that much. Gerard remembered Chrystal telling him that Frank didn’t fall in love, that Frank didn’t have relationships. Gerard figured that this was why as he heard the last of Frank crying before he got on the elevator.

* * *

Days dragged by slowly for Gerard and he found himself walking around in a haze. It wasn't until he got the reminder phone call from the doctor that he woke up a little but it was only to feel fear. He remembered why they were going again so soon and he tried to ignore the sinking feeling inside him as he was riding with Mikey to appointment.

Mikey hadn't talked to Gerard hardly at all since the incident with Frank and Gerard couldn't say that he blamed him. He knew that he had been out of hand. He had tried calling Frank a bunch of times but every time he had his phone in his hand and his thumb above Frank's name he stopped himself. He didn't know where he would even start or what he would even say, so he just gave up on it all together.

Mikey was growing tenser as they neared the hospital and Gerard gently reached out and rubbed over his back with a frown.

"It'll be okay," he whispered to his little brother. "It's going to be nothing," he assured.

Mikey had chosen to remain quiet but he let his older brother rub at his back. He didn't want to say anything because he was scared and unsure. He knew there was a chance he would be sick again and he was too nervous.

They both made their way into the building and checked in before sitting in the waiting room. The nurse seemed to call their last name too fast and forever later all at the same time.

Once they were setting down in the room the nerves inside Gerard's body were on edge. They hadn't weighted Mikey, they hadn't taken his blood like normal, they were just getting right to it, and it made him queasy.

There came the fatal knock on the door and then Mikey's doctor walked into the room and the face he gave Gerard made his whole body run cold. Gerard brought his hands up to his face and just cried.

Mikey started crying too when the doctor looked to him. "Mikey," the doctor said before stopping. "I'm really sorry, bud but it's back again...your cancer."

Gerard let out a sob at the words and just hung his head further. He had tried so hard. Wasn't that enough? Shouldn't that make things okay?

"We need to start chemo in a few days," the doctor said quietly, frowning. "It'll keep it contained but...it's too large of an area to wipe it out. Normally...Normally we would have caught it soon enough but it's spreading rapidly."

Gerard just took his hands away from his eyes and sniffled, forcing himself to look at the doctor. He couldn’t stop the heavy frown on his face.

“He may need another bone marrow transfusion at some point,” the doctor said but he trailed off and just frowned. “I’m very sorry. I was hoping it wouldn’t come back,” he said quietly.

“I know,” Gerard said, his voice shaking. “Me too.”

* * *

Mikey had curled up in bed with Gerard when they got home and he was asleep before long. Gerard just held onto his little brother as he cried, not knowing what he was going to do. Mikey was just getting better and now he was sick again, Gerard didn’t know if he could handle it but he knew he had to for Mikey. He had to be strong for him.

Gerard was lying close to Mikey when he heard the bedroom door open and he turned, seeing Jason coming into the room.

“Hey, baby,” he whispered and came over, kissing Gerard on the forehead. “How’d the appointment go?”

“His cancer's back,” Gerard whispered and his eyes poured over as he said it.

“Damn,” Jason said with a little sigh. “Well, you’re going to have to do a bit more work around here. I mean, that’s going to be expensive,” Jason hummed at the end and just kind of looked to Gerard.

Gerard wanted to hit him, with everything in him he wanted to smack Jason across the face but he knew it was best not to. If Jason flipped out like he sometimes did right now, Mikey was between them and Gerard wouldn’t risk that.

“Yes, sir,” Gerard said quietly before he nuzzled his nose into the top of Mikey’s head and got closer to his little brother.

“Does he have good odds?” Jason asked mindlessly a bit later.

“We don’t know yet,” Gerard whispered as he held Mikey closer to him.

“Well, let’s hope that it’s either not bad or terminal. I don’t want to pay for too much of this,” Jason said with a little sigh.

“You piece of shit,” Gerard snapped and he shoved him away from him and Mikey.

Gerard flinched when Jason reached for him and then yelped before Jason’s hand wrapped around his throat. He squeezed tight and Gerard tried to gasp desperately without success. His eyes felt like they were bulging after a few moments. Gerard squirmed a little as Mikey laid beside him, still asleep.

“I will fucking kill you,” Jason said through grit teeth into Gerard’s ear. Gerard whined weakly and he felt dizzy and out of it. “Then I’ll fucking drop Mikey off to the worst fucking foster home I can find,” he snapped and Gerard wanted to cry but he couldn’t breath.

Gerard’s hands fought to rip Jason’s off his throat but he found himself growing weaker before he couldn’t even lift them and his vision went dark.

* * *

Mikey opened his eyes and found Gerard laying beside him unmoving. He shook his brother a little and when he didn’t respond he frowned but figured he was just worn out. He got up from the bed and walked slowly to the door, fisting at his sleepy eyes.

He heard the TV on in the living room and he went over to it before he saw Jason on the couch. Jason was laying over the couch and he raised his head a little when he saw Mikey. “Hey, buddy,” Jason said before he sat up a little bit and pat the cushion beside him. Mikey walked over and sat himself down on it.

“You hungry?” Jason asked quietly and brushed his hand over Mikey’s cap. Mikey nodded a little and looked to Jason before he yawned.

“I’m sorry about your appointment. Gerard told me how mad he is at you but I know it’s not your fault,” Jason whispered quietly.

“Gerard’s mad at me?” Mikey asked, his tone sad and confused.

“He said if you’d been better than you wouldn’t have gotten cancer again,” Jason said with a frown. “I know it’s not your fault, Mikey. Gerard will see that too, it’s just going to take some time.”

“Is that...Is that why he’s been so quiet and hasn’t talked to me?” Mikey asked quietly with a sad frown.

Jason nodded weakly and pulled Mikey into his side. “It’ll be okay, Mikey. Let’s go make something to eat, huh?”

* * *

Jason had woken up on the couch with Mikey laying on his side, snoring quietly. He smiled softly and brushed his hand down Mikey’s back before he let his hand rest on Mikey’s small butt, through his boxers. He gripped him a little and then rubbed over the covered flesh until Jason could feel his small erection on his thigh. He smiled and leaned over pressing closer to Mikey.

He waited until Mikey’s flesh was warm and his cheeks were reddened before he stopped and got himself up. He stood and smiled as he looked to Mikey’s flustered state.

Jason walked out of the living room as the bedroom door opened and Gerard slowly walked out, looking dazed and he leaned against the wall.

“W-Where’s...Where’s Mikey?” Gerard asked in a scared tone, his voice raw from the night before.

“He’s asleep, on the couch,” Jason said as he walked into the kitchen. “Let him sleep, he woke up last night and he hasn’t been out long,” Jason commanded when Gerard had started walking over towards the living room.

“Come get coffee,” Jason said as he poured some and yawned. He watched Gerard timidly walk into the kitchen and he handed Gerard his cup.

“Jesus, you need to shower and brush your teeth. You stink,” Jason said with a scowl. Gerard looked down before he slowly made his way into the bedroom. Jason smiled when he heard the shower turn on, things were really working out with Gerard.

Jason walked into the bedroom to change his clothes when he heard Gerard’s phone vibrating on the stand. He walked over to it and saw Frank’s name on the ID. He picked the phone up and answered it, not wanting to give Frank the chance to leave a voicemail.

“H-Hello?...Gerard?” Frank’s voice came through the phone, sounding a little rough.

“Frank, this is Jason. Gerard wanted me to tell you that he doesn’t want you calling anymore,” Jason said with a bland voice.

“Listen, we had a misunderstanding,” Frank began, “but it wasn’t supposed to be like that. I just...he has to understand.”

“Gerard’s going to have me block your number so you can’t call him anymore,” Jason said. “You need to let it go, Frank. He’s done with you,” Jason said.

“Please, just let me-,” Frank had been saying before Jason hung up the phone. He dropped the phone and stepped on it with his foot, cracking it to pieces. He then set it back on the stand and grabbed up his own.

“Yes, hi. I need to purchase a new phone and have it added to my plan,” Jason said after placing his call. “Yes, also, I need a number blocked from calling.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I took forever! I'm really bad at this! Enjoy!


	32. Chapter 32

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Forewarning: This chapter has dark and heavy content in it. Readers Discretion is Advised!

Gerard was sitting in the park while he watched Mikey playing with the other kids in the park. He didn’t know what was happening with his life but he knew this wasn’t what he had wanted. Mikey was pulling away from him, he was in a relationship where he hated his partner and was constantly being abused. He wanted to get away from Jason but there was no way that he could, especially with Mikey being sick again. Jason was good with Mikey, that was one plus, the two seemed to be almost closer than he was with his own little brother. 

Gerard glanced down to his phone in his hand and sighed, his breath coming out in a thick fog in front of him. His old phone had been broken, Jason said it had fallen off the nightstand and he wanted to buy Gerard a new one anyway. It had taken Gerard a long time to get used to the new touch screen but he was getting the hang of it. 

Frank hadn’t called him in a few weeks. Gerard figured he deserved it. He still had the same number as his old phone, Jason had been nice enough to make sure he could keep it, so he knew it was just a matter of Frank not wanting to talk to him anymore. 

Gerard felt guilty because he knew a part of him had only brought Mikey to the park in hopes of seeing Frank. He knew it was a long shot but he had been hoping. He needed someone to talk to, someone who would listen to him and not tell him that he was wrong to feel the way he felt. 

Mikey was sick again, this was tearing him apart inside, and he knew that if Frank was there, he would understand. Hell, Frank would probably be just as upset as Gerard, unlike Jason who had only complained to Gerard about how much everything was going to cost him. 

Gerard was realizing that he was horrible at making decisions. His life was a bust but as he looked to Mikey smiling, he felt like things would be okay because he was happy. This was all Gerard wanted, as long as Mikey was happy, he could live. Jason had helped Gerard prepare Thanksgiving dinner and that had been perfect. They had all set down together like a real family, Mikey had been happy. 

Gerard looked up to Mikey running around, the boy had gone through his chemo twice this week but the other kids were surprisingly understand about how Mikey couldn’t run as fast and seemed to tire quickly. Gerard just felt saddened as he had held onto his little brother who had shaken and thrown up multiple times during his first two sessions of chemo.

He let his eyes gaze over the park one more time and he found a heavy frown on his lips when he didn’t see Frank. He knew he was selfish but he just missed him so much. His heart was being pulled apart inside of him and there was nothing to help it. He knew he would just have to try to make the best out of the life he had.

* * *

“Baby? We’re home,” Gerard called as they walked into the apartment and Mikey walked to his room. 

“Hey, bud,” Jason said with a smile to Mikey and he pulled him into a hug. “Did you have fun at the park?” 

“Yeah! I played football with some of the kids there,” Mikey said with a smile. “Gerard wouldn’t let us play tackle though,” he said with a pout.

“Well, he just worries about you getting hurt, bud. You’ve got to be careful.” Jason said, pouting to Mikey.

“Yeah, I guess,” Mikey said before he smiled a little. “I’m going to go take a shower.” 

“Alright,” Jason said with a smile before he looked to Gerard.

“Hey, beautiful,” Jason said with a flirtatious smile.

Gerard couldn’t help but blush a little since Jason hadn’t said anything sweet to him in a while, no one had. Gerard didn’t even get anything from Frank now, this was all he had. 

“Hey,” Gerard said sweetly. “I missed you,” he said before he pressed a gentle kiss to Jason’s mouth. 

“I missed you too,” Jason hummed with a smile and he hugged Gerard closely. “You smell so good,” he whispered against Gerard’s ear as he held him delicately and swayed with him a little. Gerard blushed and looked down a little. “I got a sitter for Mikey tonight, I’m taking you out,” he said with a smile. “I want to show the whole town how beautiful you are,” Jason said with a big grin. 

“Stop it,” Gerard said as he didn’t think he could blush anymore. 

“It’s true. Look how beautiful you are,” Jason said before he kissed Gerard again. “I got you an outfit, it’s laying on the bed,” Jason said with a smile, “I’ll go tell, Mikey.” 

Gerard smiled wide before he quickly ran into the bedroom and looked on the bed. There was a cute red ribbon tie on a box and Gerard excitedly opened it. He nearly moaned as he felt the soft shirt rest on his palms. He knew that Jason could be harsh but sometimes he could be the sweetest thing and Gerard couldn’t stop himself from smiling as he got himself dressed.

* * *

Gerard was sitting across from Jason and things felt right, like before they had moved in together. Jason was flirting with him, he was smiling at him, he was doting on him. Gerard was feeling special and it was something he hadn’t felt in a really long time. 

“Thank you for tonight,” Gerard said with a bashful smile. “You were really sweet to plan this for me,” Gerard said and shook his head in disbelief. He sipped his wine and smiled at Jason from across the table. 

“I just knew we needed a night together,” Jason said with a soft smile. “Plus, I knew you deserved something special.I’ve been such an ass lately,” Jason said with a frown. “I don’t mean to be Gerard, it’s hard to explain...I just. Sometimes I lose it. I know it’ll get better if you can just be patient with me,” Jason said,

“You don’t even have to ask,” Gerard whispered before he leaned across the table and pressed a kiss to Jason’s mouth.

“And I’m proud of you for sticking to your diet and working out. I can’t believe you lost fifteen pounds in just a few weeks. I can nearly wrap my hands around your thighs,” he said with a little laugh as he smiled to Gerard. Jason had laid in bed with Gerard last night and had smiled as he counted each rib the sleeping boy had jutting out. Gerard’s collar bones also pushed out at this point and his hips were so thin that Jason could hold them in his hands. Jason had had to search far and wide for pants to even fit Gerard since he was so small now. 

Gerard blushed and looked down, he felt special, Jason was sleeping with him more now too, proving that his hard work was paying off. 

“Christmas is in just a couple weeks. You’ll be getting something special,” Jason smiled as he sipped his whine.

“J-Jason, please,” Gerard started sheepishly. “I don’t deserve it.”

“Of course you do,” Jason said with a smile. “I love you, babe.”

“I love you too,” Gerard whispered before he smiled. 

“Gerard?” Gerard lifted his head when he heard the voice and looked to where it had come from. 

“Chrystal!” Gerard said with a large smile before he got up and went over, hugging her. “Oh, my God! I’ve missed you so much,” Gerard nearly squealed before he wrapped his arms around her in a hug. 

“I’ve missed you too! I’ve been so lonely without you,” she said and pouted but her hands ran over his back. “Baby, you’re so skinny. Are you okay?” She looked at him worriedly. 

“I like the new hair,” Gerard said with a large smile as he gently lifted one of her new blonde locks. Trying to ignore what he thought was supposed to be a compliment but he knew he was still too big for anyone to find him skinny. 

“Oh, Thank you,” she said with a grin and looked to the piece Gerard was holding. “Frank said it was…,” she cut off a little and then looked to Gerard. “Hey uh...have you talked to Frank at all?” She asked shyly. 

Gerard shook his head and tried not too frown. “No, we got into a fight and…,” Gerard just waved his hand. “It’s just better if we don’t talk.” 

“Oh, well…,” Chrystal said with a little smile. “Oh! Hi, there! I’m Chrystal,” she said as she saw Jason finally. “You must be Jason,” she said with a pleasant grin. 

“Uh, yeah and I hear you’re Chrystal,” Jason said with a smile as he motioned to the conversation they had just had. She smiled and nodded. “I assume you used to work with Gerard.”

“Oh, well not together but yeah we shared the same area of expertise,” she said with a little wink at Gerard. “We miss him,” she said with a little frown.

“Well, Gerard doesn’t miss it so no offense, let’s hope he doesn’t come back,” Jason said with a little smile. 

“Oh, no! Don’t get me wrong, I’m really happy that he’s not on the streets anymore. Thanks for taking care of him,” Chrystal said with a grin. 

“Yeah, this isn’t really the place to discuss your line of work,” Jason said to Chrystal and glanced around the room at the other people who were dressed nicely. “What is someone like you even doing in here?” 

Gerard looked to Jason and frowned before he shot Chrystal an apologetic glance. Then Gerard saw it, Chrystal’s head cocked and he was just waiting for it. Chrystal didn’t take any type of attitude from people.

“I’m here having dinner with my friend _Frank_ ,” she said and cocked her hips and eyebrows in unison at Jason, like she knew something Gerard didn’t. “But don’t worry, I’ll crawl back down to the gutters when I’m done,” she said with a snap before she turned and walked through the tables.

Gerard found his eyes following her until she reached a table over in the corner. Frank turned his head and looked to her from where he was looking at the table, seeming distracted. He smiled when he saw her before he got up and hugged her. He looked her over with a smile before he pulled out her chair. 

Gerard forced himself to look away and sit back down with Jason who was looking a bit frustrated now. “I’m sorry,” Gerard said and shook his head. “She’s a bit of a firecracker,” he said and forced a small laugh. 

Jason sipped his wine and looked down a little. Gerard felt a sinking feeling inside. He looked down and frowned, he knew there night was ruined now.

* * *

Gerard was standing outside the restaurant with Jason, waiting for a taxi. Jason had been giving Gerard the cold shoulder for a while now and Gerard just wanted things to be okay. He gently tried to hold Jason’s hand but it was slapped away.

“I can’t believe you let him treat me like that,” Jason snapped bitterly with a glare. “Some fucking crossdressing whore!” 

“J-Jason, Chrystal’s a girl,” Gerard said quietly. “She’s transgenders,” Gerard explained quietly. 

“I don’t give a fuck! Someone who just wants attention is all it is,” Jason snapped bitterly and Gerard frowned because it seemed like Jason was only trying to convince him to hate him all the more. 

“Jason...she’s not like that,” Gerard said quietly with a frown, just hoping that he could get his boyfriend to see his side of it. 

“Shut your fucking mouth!” Jason snapped quietly and since people could see if he slapped Gerard he slapped the front of his tight jeans so no one would see it. 

Gerard flinched forward as the burning covered his groin and just looked down, trying to contain his watering eyes. He wasn’t crying because of the physical pain, that he could deal with. He had just hoped that their night was going to be a good one and had only ended up disappointed and being harmed.

“I’m sorry,” Gerard said quietly and kept his look down.

“This is why I shouldn’t be dating a whore! I take you out and all your slutty friends want to ruin my evening,” Jason snapped to which Gerard only continued to look down and his eyes watered more. “Are you happy with yourself?” 

Gerard just shook his head and held back a sob. “Jason, I said I was sorry. What do you want me to do? I can’t change it now,” Gerard pleaded sadly. 

Jason wrapped his arm around Gerard like he was pulling him close to keep him warm but Gerard soon felt pain as Jason roughly pinched at his side and twisted. “I want you, to shut the fuck up,” Jason whispered in Gerard’s ear. “You’ve ruined my night, like you ruin everything. I just wanted to take you out and have things be okay but you fucking ruined it,” Jason sighed. 

“I know,” Gerard said, his eyes watering more as he looked to Jason. “I’m sorry, Jason. Please, forgive me?” Gerard whispered but he felt the pain increase in his side and he let out a little gasp of a cry, trying not to draw the attention of the people on the street. 

“Did you not just hear me tell you to shut up?! Are you fucking deaf?...or just stupid?” He asked angrily and Gerard just cried more, the tears finally racing down his cheeks. “Huh?” Jason wanted Gerard to speak, he wanted him to answer the question so that he could hurt him again but part of him was hoping that Gerard would smarten up.

Gerard shook his head and looked down, sniffling quietly. “Good,” Jason said into his ear with a smirk. 

Gerard glanced to the side and he saw Frank standing by his Mustang, digging in his pocket for his keys. Gerard wanted to run to him, to tell him that he was sorry, for someone to hold him and he would owe them nothing in return. Gerard was realizing that Frank was really the only person who really loved him other than his little brother and he was starting to see that love felt way better than money. 

He prayed for Frank to look up and see him, to notice that he was there, then Frank did. Gerard’s eyes met Frank’s and he instantly had to look down because he remembered that his were full of tears and utter sadness. Frank looked like he was about to walk over but a cab finally pulled up and Jason opened the door before he forced Gerard in and then got in himself. 

Gerard just kept his look downward as the car pulled off, restraining from looking to Frank again, he knew he’d be beaten for it if he did. He just quietly sniffled as he hung his head and thought about how he had ruined Jason’s night. He wanted to apologize a million times but he knew his words were worth nothing and the other man would only tell him to be quiet. 

They were both silent the entire ride home and the whole way up to Jason’s apartment. When they reached the doorway Jason grabbed Gerard by the back of the head and slammed his head against the doorframe, knocking him out. Gerard laid weakly on his side and blinked only for a second before his world was dark. Jason bent over and picked him up before the door opened and Jason smiled to the younger boy across from him. 

“Passed out. He’s a drunk sometimes,” Jason said with a little laugh to the teen who nodded and smiled, moving out of the way so Jason could come in. “Let me just lay him down,” Jason said before he brought Gerard into the bedroom and laid him on the bed. 

He came back out and reached into his wallet. “Did you give it to him?” Jason asked the boy who smirked and nodded. “Good,” Jason handed him five hundred dollars.

“He’s shifting around in his bed now,” the kid said with a smirk as he headed to the door. “I hope you enjoy your night.”

“I will. Thanks again, Mark,” Jason smiled before he closed the door and locked it. 

Jason slowly went into the bedroom where Gerard was before he cuffed one of his wrists to the bed. He smirked at him as he stripped down to his boxers. He knew Gerard didn’t get him as excited as he’d been hoping for, the boy didn’t struggle enough when he was being raped and it was starting to become dull for Jason. 

He left the bedroom and went down the hall, slowly pushing open the door. He saw Mikey on the bed, looking dazed and he squirmed a little as he looked to Jason, reaching for him. He was letting out these quiet scared whimpers as his mind was spinning. 

Jason had paid the babysitter to slip Mikey a roofie and get him into his briefs, all had gone as planned as Mikey’s eyes rolled around in his head. If Gerard wasn’t going to give him the fight he wanted and he was paying all this money for Mikey’s bills, he was going to get something out of it, one way or the other.

He slowly crawled over the bed and placed his lips against Mikey’s. “J-Jason,” Mikey slurred out in a weak, scared voice. 

“You’re okay, Mikey. You won’t remember anything in the morning,” he whispered into the boy's ear before he slowly dragged down his little Batman briefs and smirked at the fussing he heard.


	33. Chapter 33

When Gerard finally woke up he wished he was still asleep. His whole head ached horribly and he felt an indescribable pain towards the front of his skull. He whimpered and shifted in the sheets a little as he was coming more and more aware of himself. He brought his hands to his face and rubbed before he hissed and nearly yelped when he rubbed his forehead. He whined weakly and felt warm tears running from his eyes. 

This wasn’t how things were supposed to be and it was all he could think as he laid in the soft bedsheets crying because he was in so much pain. His boyfriend was supposed to love him and take care of him, not cause more pain for him. He felt like he had suffered enough through his life but part of him believed this was all happening because of the person he had been. 

He had slept around with strangers in filthy motel rooms and cramped back seats. He had given blowjobs to fathers and husbands and this was how God was making him pay for all the bad he had done. He had tried his hardest to keep up with things the honest way. He had worked three jobs at one point but he had never been able to see Mikey and the daycare had taken most of his money. 

Soon enough he had to skip a day of work for one of Mikey’s appointments and got fired. Then one day he slept in a little too long when the power had been shut off and his alarm hadn’t woken him, he lost that job. Then he couldn’t afford for someone to watch Mikey and lost the last one. After weeks of desperately trying to make money through odd jobs one of Mikey’s bills came, with big red stamps on it. They had threatened to stop Mikey’s care unless a large sum of the bill was paid for. 

Gerard had gone to the library after hearing an idea from one of his neighbors and with tears in his eyes, he had posted an ad online. He offered up his virginity for a couple grand and by the time he checked his email again the next day, he had multiple responses. He picked the highest bidder and had slowly made his way, hanging his head in shame, to the motel the man had picked. 

The place had been filthy and the man had been far too old for a young sixteen year old boy, even if he was almost seventeen. Gerard closed his eyes tighter as he could still remember the musty smell that had been in the air as the man had roughly taken him. Gerard had gripped onto the man from the pain and cried through the whole ordeal. When the man had finished with him he had pulled out and gotten dressed. Gerard was in too much pain to stand or to move so the man had left him there alone. Gerard had laid still for hours and had sobbed from the physical and emotional pain. 

He never wanted to have sex again, he never wanted to be touched again but sadly, it had only been a few more weeks before Gerard found himself on the eve of his seventeenth birthday in the backseat of a car with another man. This one paid far less but the pain was still there and as the clock had changed to midnight, Gerard’s only gift for that birthday, was the man finishing inside him. 

Gerard cried as he hugged himself and he just felt so low because as bad as it had been sleeping with strangers on the streets, he was almost wishing to go back to it. There was nothing worse than this but he would have to pull through for Mikey and the thought only made him sick.

It was a good hour longer before the bedroom door opened, by now Gerard had managed to sit up and was gently cradling his face. He weakly lifted his head, looking to Jason.

“Damn, that’s a nasty bump,” Jason said as he came over with a tray of food. He gently set it on Gerard’s lap. “Let me see,” he whispered and gently brushed back Gerard’s bangs, making him flinch. 

Gerard looked down to the tray full of breakfast that Jason had brought him and for a moment he wondered if it was full of poison. 

“I figured you’d be tired today so I had a sitter bring Mikey out for a bit,” Jason hummed quietly. “He seemed a little hazy this morning. Is he like that a lot with his chemo?” 

Gerard weakly nodded, noting how Jason had dropped caring for him like the large bump on his head had just disappeared. “He...He gets pretty worn out,” Gerard said, his voice nearly a hushed whisper. 

“He almost seemed high,” Jason said with a little shake of his head. “Does he get sore sometimes too?” 

“Sometimes his muscles act up,” Gerard said but scrunched up his face a little. “But that doesn’t usually come until a little later.”

“Oh, well he said his back and bottom hurt this morning,” Jason said quietly. “He said it wasn’t too bad though.” 

“Must just be his muscle pains,” Gerard said mindlessly before he sipped his coffee. “Thank you for breakfast,” Gerard said quietly. 

“Don’t even worry about it,” Jason said with a bit of a smile. “You just stay right here in bed and I am going to spoil you all day,” he chimed happily.

“But...I thought you had work,” Gerard said, not showing how hopeful he was.

“Nah, I took the day off so I could be with you. I miss you and wanted to make up for last night,” he said quietly. “I love you,” he whispered before he kissed Gerard’s hand gently and rubbed it, holding it in his. 

“I love you too,” Gerard said with a tiny smile.

* * *

Jason had helped Gerard cover up his nasty forehead with makeup, then with his hair before he took him out, shopping. He wanted Gerard to pick out some things for Mikey. Christmas wasn’t far away and he was hoping to give Mikey a big Christmas. This made Gerard happy, that Jason loved Mikey, and wanted to spoil him. The two hadn’t exchanged the phrase yet but Gerard could sense Jason felt affectionate towards Mikey. Especially the way he would look at him sometimes. 

Gerard was standing in the middle of a toy store when his eyes landed on a stuffed pig and he instantly thought of Frank and Mikey. He bit his bottom lip before he reached out and gently picked up the small animal, looking down at it. Gerard knew that Mikey missed Frank horribly and he felt bad for keeping the two apart but he knew he couldn’t bring them together anymore. Frank had made no attempt to contact him and Gerard feared Jason becoming upset. 

Gerard knew that if Frank started coming around again, it would cause him relationship problems. Gerard gently rubbed at his bruised forehead just at the thought before he sighed out gently and set the pig back down. He couldn’t be thinking about Frank right now. Christmas was coming and Gerard had to find a way to get Jason something without using his money. 

Gerard had looked at suits and ties and everything a business man could want or need but it bored him. He was eighteen years old, he didn’t care about buying things people needed. He wanted to get Jason a gift that was fun and different but he really couldn’t think of anything that Jason would like. He bit his lip and wondered if that should be a problem. They had been together for over two months now, had lived together for one of those months. Shouldn’t they know each other well enough by now to know what the other might find to be a fun gift? Gerard wasn’t sure and he tried not to think on it too hard.

* * *

Frank was watching Mikey playing in the park, running around but today he was limping, and he would make faces like he was sore. Frank didn’t know how Mikey was doing or what was going on with him. He didn’t even know if Mikey had cancer or not, he had only heard of the possibility. He knew he could find out through the hospital but he didn’t want to find out through paperwork and faxes. He wanted Gerard to call him or to unblock his number. He couldn’t believe how Gerard had cut him off so heartlessly. 

Frank was watching Mikey play and occasionally the boy would walk over to someone, Frank figured it must be a sitter. The woman watching Mikey showed no actual emotion or care for the boy, she hardly watched him. Then again, Frank figured this could work to his advantage and he slowly jogged over to Mikey.

“Frank!” Mikey shouted loudly when he saw the other man and bolted to him before he jumped up into his arms and latched onto him.

Frank’s eyes watered as he held Mikey closely to him and he held himself back from sobbing. It had almost been a month since he’d seen Mikey and his heart felt like it was broken in his chest. It felt so good to know the boy was okay and to see him that Frank felt a little sick in his stomach from how light it felt. 

“I’ve missed you so much, Mikey,” Frank whispered before he sniffled and nuzzled closely to Mikey. “I love you,” he sniffled softly and looked to Mikey who lifted his head to see Frank.

“I’ve missed you too and I love you too,” Mikey said with a big smile that made Frank melt instantly. “Why won’t Gerard let me see you anymore?” Mikey asked sadly as Frank finally set him down but still held onto both of his hands. 

“I hurt your brother, Mikey. It’s my fault,” Frank whispered, knowing he would never say a bad thing about Gerard to Mikey or to anyone for that matter. 

“So...you don’t want to see me anymore?” Mikey asked sadly and started pulling away from Frank. 

“No! Mikey, no, I do want to see you but Gerard doesn’t want to hear from me. He’s blocked my number from calling him. He just, I hurt him and he can’t forgive me. You can’t blame him for that Mikey and you have to understand…,” Frank had to pause and breath out slowly so he wouldn’t cry more. “Even if we don’t see each other again...I love you, very much and I will never forget you.” 

Mikey’s eyes watered as he looked to Frank and imagined never seeing him again. “I love you too,” he sniffled. “And-and I won’t forget you either,” he whispered before he hugged Frank. 

Frank forced himself to pull away before he reached into his duffle bag and pulled out wrapped Christmas present. “I promised you that I would take you Christmas shopping to get Gerard something. I can’t take you but I did get you something to give him,” he whispered and then handed Mikey the boxes. “It’s a sketch pad and some drawing pencils. It’s a really nice set, Mikey,” Frank whispered, trying not to be sad. It had been a nice set, it had cost him a couple hundred but money didn’t mean anything to him when it came to other people’s happiness, especially the Way brother’s. 

“This one if for you from me and this is for Gerard,” Frank whispered and handed Mikey a large box for himself and a card for Gerard. “You can open them on Christmas, okay?” Frank said with a weak smile as Mikey was now smiling at the gifts. 

Mikey leaned forward and kissed Frank on the cheek. “Thank you, Frank,” Mikey said quietly before he put the gifts on the bench so he could hug Frank one more time. The older man gripped him tight and Mikey felt safe. “F-Frank?” Mikey whispered and he heard Frank hum back to him. “I have cancer again…,” Mikey said quietly, feeling like the other man should know.

Frank couldn’t help himself and he let out a sob before he gripped Mikey so tightly. He cried and he sniffled before he whispered to Mikey quietly. “You’re going to be okay, Mikey,” Frank whispered as he looked to the little boy before him. “Okay?” He asked and Mikey nodded. 

“Michael James!” They both turned to see the older woman who was Mikey’s sitter looking to them. “Get away from that man, now!” 

“I love you,” Frank whispered and hugged Mikey one more time, not wanting to let him go but he did. “Merry Christmas, Mikey.”

“Merry Christmas, Frank,” Mikey sniffled before he let Frank’s hand go. He watched Frank wave to him before he walked off and he frowned.

“You’re supposed to come when I call you,” the woman hissed, now behind Mikey. She slapped him on the back of the head and he whined.

* * *

When Gerard got home there was an older woman sitting at the table in the dining room. Gerard thought she looked like a strict, old school teacher and he looked to Jason confused. 

“This is Marianne,” Jason said. “Mikey’s new sitter.” 

Gerard glanced back to the woman and forced a polite smile on his face, though he couldn’t help but to think he wanted this woman nowhere near Mikey. She looked rather harsh and uptight, though Gerard knew he probably shouldn’t judge her right off. 

“Nice to meet you,” Gerard said as he had set down the shopping bags that were full of gifts for Mikey. “I’m Gerard,” he said with a smile and held out his hand. “Mikey’s brother.” 

She eyed his hand, now that she was standing, before she took it with a disgusted look on her face and walked right by him. “Call me if you need me again. That child needs discipline though, I will tell you that now,” she harped to Jason, ignoring Gerard entirely. 

“Did he misbehave?” Jason asked quietly as he looked to Marianne. 

“He acts like a child with no boundaries,” she said bitterly. 

“He’s ten,” Gerard said with his arms crossed over his chest.

“Well,” Marianne said, wrinkling up her nose. “I guess I know why he is that way. With his parental figure making excuse like that.” She turned from Gerard and looked to Jason. “I’d like to start watching him five days a week. I could have him in order in no time.” 

“I’m sorry but no,” Gerard snapped. He didn’t care if she wasn’t talking to him, Mikey was his, not Jason’s. “I don’t need you to raise my little brother.”

“Well, I guess I’ll just go and you can have a little hellion running around,” she snapped back before grabbing her coat and leaving, closing the door a little louder than needed. 

There was silence in the apartment now and Gerard swallowed to wet his dry throat as Jason glared at him. “You like to fucking humiliate me, don’t you?” 

Gerard instantly looked down and held his arms by his side, being submissive. He shook his head weakly and felt a lump forming in the back of his throat. Jason started walking towards him and Gerard flinched with the sound of each step. When Jason was standing by his side a tear slipped down Gerard’s cheek. 

“You worthless piece of shit,” Jason harped before he shoved Gerard down to the floor, hearing the younger man yelp. “I have told you to fucking keep you mouth closed,” he reminded and gave a swift kick, connecting with Gerard’s thin stomach.

Gerard sobbed out and tried to hide his stomach from more blows reaching it. He pressed his tear stained face against the hardwood floor and tried to seem as small as possible.

“Get up,” Jason hollered and when Gerard remained on the floor shaking he reached down and roughly grabbed his frail arm. “I fucking tell you to do something, you do it! Do you understand?!” He gritted out against Gerard’s ear. The boy let out a sob and nodded his head. “Go to your fucking room!” 

Gerard hung his head and slowly walked into their room before he shut the door. He stood by the bed shaking as he pressed a hand to his aching stomach. He slowly eased himself down on the bed and whimpered when his stomach muscles ached painfully.

Jason came in the room and shut the door before he locked it and Gerard looked to him with his tear stained eyes, filled with fear. Jason stripped off his jacket before his shirt and Gerard cowered back on the bed. 

“J-Jason...P-Please?” He whimpered and cowered back, earning himself a harsh slap to the face from Jason.

“Clothes off. Now!” He demanded.

Gerard sobbed quietly as he slowly unbuttoned his shirt under Jason’s harsh gaze. He got it off and then stood, cowering back, as he removed his pants. 

Jason looked over Gerard and how thin he was. There was hardly anything left to him at all, his once plump ass was now mostly gone and his stomach was beginning to suck in, behind his hip bones. Jason smirked and reached out, gripping Gerard’s hips, feeling the bones beneath what little bits of fat was left on Gerard’s body. 

“You’ve started eating more, haven’t you?” Jason snapped angrily. Gerard whimpered and shook his head, looking down at his body, trying to see which part of it was making Jason unhappy. There was a huge, red welt on his stomach from where he’d been kicked. 

“I don’t want you to eat for the rest of today, do you understand me?” Jason growled at Gerard who only nodded his head and tried not to sob because he was starving. 

“Kneel on the fucking bed, whore,” Jason ordered and backed up to remove his pants.

Gerard whimpered and felt more tears running down his face. He was in pain and he felt sick, he didn’t want Jason to touch him. He just wanted to curl up in bed and be cuddled up to. He wanted Mikey to be curled up to his chest and he wanted, he closed his eyes as he thought of Frank. 

“J-Jason, please? I-,” Gerard started but was harshly punched in the face, forcing him to land on the bed. He weakly curled up, covering his face with his hands, and cried. He felt Jason force his hips up into the air and slide down his briefs. He sobbed out brokenly.

* * *

Mikey was curled up under his bed, hugging onto his stuffed pig and looking to his bedroom door with fright. He’d heard Jason yelling at Gerard, he’d heard Gerard crying. Now there was noises coming from the bedroom that made Mikey hide his face into his stuffed pig. His big brother was sobbing and Jason was moaning. Something about Jason’s moans made Mikey uncomfortable and he wanted to never hear the sound again. 

He shifted and fussed as his sore bottom ached and he wanted to fall asleep. He wanted to forget what was happening and how his brother was letting out these throaty cries of pain. Jason kept calling his brother names and saying things that made Gerard cry more. Mikey whined and pulled his blanket over his head.


	34. Chapter 34

Jason’s eyes opened as he’d been in the process of dreaming about little Mikey and he cursed but smiled contently. Jason knew he was hard and he glanced over to his side and saw Gerard’s naked back, he smirked at the protruding shoulder blades. Jason didn’t much feel like fighting, he just wanted to bury his dick in something, and Gerard was the closest hole. He slowly rolled himself and pulled back the covers before he pawed around for the bottle of lube he’d used the night before. He found it and slicked up his fingers before he began to rub them over the pucker of Gerard’s hole. He also reached around and started fisting at Gerard’s dick with the excess lube. 

He pressed his hardened dick against the small of Gerard’s back and moaned. Gerard stirred and whimpered before he pressed back into Jason’s fingers and fussed, good whimpers, happy fussing. 

“You’re so fucking gorgeous, baby,” Jason purred the lie into Gerard’s ear. “You see how you get me,” he moaned and rubbed his dick between Gerard’s slick cheeks, taking his fingers away from his hole. He continued to stroke the younger male until he was a whimpering mess. 

Jason pulled Gerard’s ass apart before he slid inside him and moaned. “You like that, you slut?” Gerard whimpered and nodded as he pushed back in time with Jason’s thrusts. 

This was a thing Jason realized about Gerard, he liked to be fucked dirty. He wanted you to pull his hair and call him a whore but he wanted you to snuggle after and call him beautiful. Jason always just left him after and told him he was disgusting for acting that way. He knew how low it made Gerard think of himself and only added to Gerard’s lack of confidence. 

“Here, baby,” Jason purred and rolled them so Gerard was on top with his back to him. Gerard began bouncing like a perfect little slut and Jason let his eyes slip shut. He tipped his head back and closed his eyes before his hands found those tiny hips and Gerard was almost thin enough to be confused with Mikey, Jason smirked, it was just what he wanted.

He let Gerard bounce and moan but he blocked out Gerard’s noises and imagined the ones Mikey would make if he was with him. He came too quickly, filling Gerard’s ass as he was imagining Mikey instead. Gerard stopped his bouncing and slowly slid off, Jason knew that Gerard understood that once Jason finished, he didn’t want to be fucked any longer. He smirked as the cum slowly dripped from Gerard’s ass and his dick twitched as he imagined doing that with Mikey. 

Gerard hadn’t finished but that was no concern of Jason’s, he had to shower before going to work today. He got himself out of bed, not so much as glancing to Gerard before he went into the bathroom and closed the door.

* * *

Mikey was sitting at the bar and watching Gerard stand by the stove, cooking him breakfast. His older brother looked worn out and saddened. Mikey frowned as he couldn’t much remember the last time he had really talked to Gerard. He slowly slid down from his stool and walked around the bar. He reached his hands out and carefully wrapped them around his brother, resting his head on Gerard’s back. Gerard felt thin and the bones in his back pressed against Mikey’s cheek but he only nuzzled closer to his big brother. 

He heard Gerard let out a weak noise of sadness before he felt his older brother tightly grip his arms. “I love you,” Gerard whispered quietly and it made Mikey frown. It seemed like Gerard was always quiet now, he never wanted to talk too loudly. 

“I love you too, Gee,” Mikey whispered back before he kissed his brother’s back and breathed in his scent. He missed sleeping with his older brother and being able to curl up with him. He just felt like he couldn’t now with Jason being in the bed with Gerard. 

“Is my breakfast done?” Jason asked as he came down the hall and Mikey felt his brother tighten up and the spatula awkwardly hit the pan of eggs.

“Y-Yes,” Gerard weakly spoke before he began to fix a plate for Jason. “M-Mikey, baby, go sit back in your seat,” Gerard whispered. Mikey frowned but did as he was told. 

Gerard came over to the bar and carefully placed down Mikey’s plate in front of him before he quickly set down Jason’s, who was now seated beside Mikey. “Thank you, Gee,” Mikey piped with a smile to his older brother, wanting him to return it. Gerard did but it seemed to lack the glow it used to hold. 

“You’re welcome, baby,” Gerard whispered before he came around and placed a gentle kiss on the top of Mikey’s head. 

He sat himself in the seat next to Mikey and Mikey glanced to the small portion of eggs on Gerard’s plate. There was no bacon or sausage on his like there was on theirs and he had no toast or pancakes. 

“Gerard, aren’t you hungry?” Mikey asked quietly as he looked to his older brother. 

“N-No, baby. I just wanted a little something,” Gerard said with a smile, trying to keep his little brother oblivious to his hunger. 

“I’m amazed you even need that. Didn’t you eat earlier?” Jason asked with a glare that Mikey didn’t see, biting into his own piece of sausage. 

“O-Oh,” Gerard said and Mikey noticed how his brother seemed to sadly look at the eggs. “Yeah. You’re right,” Gerard said before he scraped his eggs onto Mikey’s plate. “There you go, baby,” Gerard whispered before he kissed the side of Mikey’s head and got up from the bar. He went around and started washing up the dishes. 

Mikey sadly looked to his brother before he looked to Jason. He had a feeling Jason was the reason for Gerard’s unhappiness but then he couldn’t understand why they would have moved in with Jason for him to be something bad. Hadn’t Gerard wanted to be with Jason because he made him happy? 

“So, Michael, how was your day at the park yesterday?” Jason asked as he took a sip of his orange juice.

Mikey wanted to test this out, see how nice Jason truly was. “It was good,” he began before taking a bite of his pancake. “I saw Frank too,” he said innocently enough. 

Mikey and Jason looked up when Gerard had dropped a plate he’d been washing. “I’m sorry,” he quickly squeaked before he got on his knees and started picking up all the pieces that had scattered over the floor.

“Frank, huh?” Jason asked, pulling his eyes from Gerard. 

“Yeah, I miss him,” Mikey said with a frown. 

“Well, he treated your brother badly. You shouldn’t miss him,” Jason said firmly. 

“He loves me,” Mikey added with a small smile. “He said he missed Gerard too and that he was sorry. Gerard forgives you when you’re mean,” Mikey said, reminding Jason. 

Gerard was now just shaking as he was kneeling on the floor, trying to get up all the pieces of the plate. Jason was looking to him with a bitter look in his eyes.

“Gerard? Can I see you in our room for a second?” Jason asked before smiling softly to Mikey.

Gerard seemed to restrain a whimper as he stood and looked to his little brother with a sad smile. “Hey, baby. You wanna eat your breakfast while you watch your shows?” 

Mikey smiled at this and nodded. Gerard turned on the small TV at the bar and plugged in the headphones they kept with it. He carefully placed them on Mikey’s ears before he turned the cartoons up. Mikey noted it was a little louder than usual but he didn’t mind as he watched the screen. 

His brother kissed the top of his head before he walked off with Jason and at one point, Mikey thought he heard something bang loudly but he figured it was probably the show. He kept hearing it over and over and figured it must be the headphones. He unplugged them for a second and plugged them back in, the banging had stopped. He looked up to see Jason walk by a moment later with his briefcase. He smiled at him and waved.

“Bye, Jason,” Mikey said with a smile before he went back to eating his breakfast and watching his show. 

It wasn’t long after before he saw the door open and Marianne walked in. Mikey frowned, he didn’t care for her a lot. She was mean to him and sometimes if he got excited she would pinch the back of his arm and tell him to quiet down. He shied away from her a little bit.

She came over and removed the headphones from his ears before she clicked off the TV. “When someone walks in the door you greet them!” She slapped the back of Mikey’s head. “Well are you going to greet me?” 

“G-Good Morning, Miss Marianne,” Mikey said weakly before he looked down. 

“You have chemo today with your doctor. Your brother doesn’t want to take you, so I am going to,” Marianne said, glaring at Mikey. 

“B-But, I always go with, Gee,” Mikey said, frowning as he imagined being at the hospital without his brother. Gerard held him the whole time he was getting his chemo and he took care of him. Mikey didn’t think Marianne would be as nice as Gerard. 

“Stop your whining and go get yourself ready! Now!” She harped and he quickly jumped up before he ran and got himself dressed. 

Mikey finished getting himself ready and stopped outside his brother’s bedroom door. “G-Gee? Can I say goodbye?” Mikey asked and frowned when his brother didn’t answer him. “Gee?” Mikey tried to open the door but found it locked. He frowned and looked down a little before he heard Marianne snap her fingers and motion for him to hurry up. “I love you,” Mikey said quietly to the door before he ran over to the older woman.

“You need to listen, boy,” she sighed before slapping the back of his head and shoving him out the doorway.

* * *

Mikey was sitting in his chair with the tubes connected to his arm and he felt nauseous. Marianne had left him, telling him he was old enough to go through it alone. Sure she was just out in the other room but he wanted someone to help him. She hadn’t brought him anything to read or to entertain himself with and told him he wasn’t allowed to watch any cartoons while he was here. She didn’t believe children should watch television so he was sitting in silence. 

Mikey felt like it had been forever but eventually the nurse came and unhooked him from his machine. He had thrown up a couple times and he felt horrible about it. His mouth still tasted like puke since Marianne hadn’t brought him a water like Gerard always did. He stood up slowly and he felt tired and dizzy but he stayed upright.

“Mikey, honey?” The nurse asked and Mikey looked to her. “Where’s Gerard today?” 

Mikey shrugged weakly and just gave her a little smile. She looked to him sadly before she gently pet his head and sent him towards the other room where Marianne was waiting and watching the news. 

“Ma’am, I’m ready,” Mikey said quietly and she looked to him and sighed.

“It’s about time,” she harped before she roughly pulled his shoulder, guiding him towards the elevator. He felt his stomach lurch and bit his lip before he fussed and just breathed through it. He just wanted to go home and see Gerard.

* * *

Gerard was curled up in bed, hugging himself, and crying. He weakly held his wrist and sobbed from the pain, he knew it was broken. He had went out and got an ice pack for it but it was still swollen, deep red, and purple. 

Gerard didn’t know where his little brother was and that scared him the most but then he heard the door to the apartment open and he forced himself up, wiping at his eyes. “M-Mikey?” Gerard asked as he walked out the bedroom and he found a smile on his face, not thinking about how badly he was hurting. Mikey ran up to him and hugged him tightly. “Hey, baby. Where have you been?” 

“He had chemo today. Maybe if you didn’t drink so much every night you’d remember,” Marianne said bitterly, eyeing Gerard’s rumpled state. 

Gerard looked to her confused but then he figured this must be the story Jason had given her to make up for his messed up state. “Yes, ma’am,” Gerard said weakly, looking down to Mikey. He wasn’t even thinking about her, he was thinking about his little brother and how guilty he felt. He had never missed any of Mikey’s chemo treatments, he hugged his little brother closer with his one good arm. 

“Are you fit to watch him do you think?” Marianne asked bitterly. 

Gerard nodded, keeping his face looking downward at Mikey. She made a small noise in the back of her throat before she left them alone, leaving the apartment. 

“Gee? What happened to your face?” Mikey asked quietly as he looked up to his older brother who looked so tired and messed up, his face bruised and swollen.

“I fell down the stairs,” Gerard said and forced himself to smile. “You know me with my big, old boots. Always falling over stuff,” he whispered before he gently pulled off Mikey’s cap with his one good hand. 

“What happened to your arm?” Mikey asked and looked to Gerard’s awkwardly placed wrist.

“Oh, I sprained it,” Gerard whispered before he carefully helped Mikey take off his jacket. “How...How was the doctor? I’m sorry I didn’t make it,” he said quietly with a frown. 

Gerard was used to talking in a hushed tone now. He figured, the quieter he was, the less Jason would notice him. Jason had claimed that Gerard still had feelings for Frank that morning and had shoved him down before kicking him into the wall. He had kicked Gerard’s head back into the wall until Gerard had passed out. Gerard had only woken up a few moments ago. 

“I-It was okay,” Mikey lied, seeing how worn out his brother looked, how worried. “Marianne was really good with me,” Mikey said and forced a small smile for his brother. He didn’t want Gerard to feel guilty about not being able to make it when he looked so tired and had fallen down the stairs.

“G-Good,” Gerard said and forced a small smile. “That’s so good,” he gently pet his hand through Mikey’s hair, happy that he’d been taken care of. “You feeling sick?” Gerard asked quietly. “Hungry? Tired?” 

Mikey smiled as his brother was doting on him with his affection, it had been a while. “Can I lay down with you for a while?” Mikey asked shyly, he missed his older brother’s attention so badly. He just wanted to be closed to him again. 

“Of course,” Gerard whispered with a gentle smile before he brought Mikey into the room he shared with Jason. He knew it would be okay, he had cleaned up from the fight earlier and Jason wasn’t supposed to be home for a few hours. 

They both crawled into the bed and Mikey was very careful about Gerard’s arm. He nuzzled into his big brother's chest and let out a content sigh, he was happy, and he felt so safe with his brother. He placed a soft kiss on Gerard’s cheek before he rested his eyes, so worn out from his doctor's appointment. 

“I love you,” Mikey hummed out tiredly.

“And I love you, baby,” Gerard whispered back to his little brother who hid into him and things felt perfect for the first time in a long time. He placed a gentle kiss on top of Mikey’s head and nuzzled into it. 

It wasn’t long before Mikey was asleep and Gerard did his best not to follow. He feared sleeping too long and Jason coming home to find them in his bed. He feared Jason becoming angry and hurting Mikey. Gerard realized this probably wasn’t a good place for Mikey if he had to fear him being hurt but then he knew, Jason hadn’t harmed Mikey, only cared for him. He couldn’t leave when Mikey had everything he needed and was safe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, September was a crazy month! I welcomed a new niece into the world and my other sister got married, all within 24 hours of one another! All the while I worked both my jobs and helped with the wedding and decorating. Also, preparing for family... BLAH! Now that the crazy part of the year is over, I plan to get more writing done! No more crazy waits!


	35. Chapter 35

Gerard stood in the kitchen preparing lunch for Mikey. It had been a few days since his broken wrist and he was starting to get used to the cast on his arm. He smiled softly as he looked at a bouquet of flowers that were sitting on the bar. Jason had bought them for him, they were lovely and smelt so good. Jason had been babying him ever since he had found out about Gerard’s broken wrist, and it felt nice to Gerard, to feel like he was loved again. 

 

“Mikey, baby, lunch,” Gerard hollered to his little brother who was sitting in the living room watching his show. He placed Mikey’s sandwich and chips on the bar, in front of Mikey’s chair, before he began cleaning up the items he had used. “Hey, you,” Gerard said with a smile to Mikey who winced when he got up in his chair. Gerard frowned at Mikey’s pained expression and came over to the bar. “Are you okay?”

 

“Y-Yeah,” Mikey said and forced a little smile for his brother before biting into his sandwich. “I think my muscles are just sore from my chemo,” Mikey said quietly as he picked up one of his chips and took a small bite from it. 

 

Gerard frowned and walked around the bar, feeling his little brother’s forehead. “Did you sleep okay?” He asked, looking into Mikey’s eyes for an honest answer.

 

Mikey looked down as he remembered a piece of a weird dream he had of Jason the night before. Jason had been in his bed with him and Mikey remembered how he had felt a lot of pain in his bottom and then it had started to feel good. He didn’t want to tell Gerard about the dream and have Gerard get mad at him. Gerard didn’t like Mikey talking about things like that, Mikey knew he especially wouldn’t be happy if Mikey was dreaming about Jason. Mikey was lost though, he didn’t understand why two boys would have sex like he had dreamed. 

 

“I...I had a bad dream,” was all Mikey allowed himself to say before he took another bite of his sandwich. Mikey also felt groggy but he figured that was probably just the chemo too, he wanted to nap after his sandwich, and hopefully lay with Gerard. “Can I lay with you after I eat?”

 

Gerard gave Mikey a soft smile before he brushed back his little brothers hair. “Of course you can,” he whispered before he placed a tiny kiss on Mikey’s cheek and went back around the bar, cleaning up from lunch. 

 

“Gerard? Where’s your lunch?” Mikey asked, noting his brother had hardly been eating anything for the last few days. It was like he skipped some meals all together and hardly ate anything when he did eat. Mikey glanced at his brother, frowning at how skinny he was. 

 

“Oh, I ate already,” Gerard lied and looked to his little brother with a small smile. 

 

Mikey frowned but nodded. “Okay,” he said defeatedly as he watched his big brother clean up the kitchen. He couldn’t get down the other half of his sandwich and he pushed the plate towards Gerard with a small smile. “Thank you, Gee,” he said quietly.

 

Gerard looked to the plate and frowned a little. He knew Mikey’s appetite dropped severely when he had to go through chemo but he was hoping it would have held off longer. He wanted Mikey to gain some more weight before he started losing it all over again. 

 

“Baby, don’t you think you could eat just a few more bites?” Gerard asked, coming around to his little brother with the sandwich. 

 

Mikey frowned as he looked to Gerard and then too the sandwich. He rubbed his stomach, trying to see if it would feel better. He felt all cramped up in his lower belly and it ached. Eating seemed to put more weight on it and he didn’t want to try pushing more on top of it. He shook his head with a frown. 

 

“Come on, Mikey. Please?” Gerard tried once more but sighed a little when Mikey shook his head. “Alright,” he said before he picked up the plate and took it away from Mikey, going to bag up the half of sandwich, incase Mikey got hungry later. 

 

He watched his little brother walk to his room with a slight limp and once he was done cleaning up in the kitchen he followed and curled up with Mikey on his twin bed. He kissed his little brothers temple and held him closely, breathing in Mikey’s scent.

* * *

Jason was standing in his office on the phone with Mikey’s hospital. He was wondering where all of Mikey’s bills were and where Gerard’s was as well. In all honesty, he hadn’t paid a cent to the hospital for the care of either of them but he wouldn’t let Gerard know that. He figured he should at least check in on the amount owed before problems arose and Gerard found out that Jason hadn’t been paying for anything. 

 

The woman on the other end of the phone was checking for him, seeing where the bills could have gotten hung up and what the current balance on the account was. Jason sighed out through his nose, knowing it would be some ridiculous amount. Even with Mikey having insurance through the state, it didn’t mean it wouldn’t be at a large number at this point. 

 

“Sir, are you still there?” The woman asked as she came back on the line and the annoying orchestra music stopped playing. 

 

“Yes, I’m here,” Jason said and rolled his eyes as he waited to find out how much Gerard was going to owe him for all of this. 

 

“It appears the balance for that account has been cleared. It’s being paid by an anonymous donor,” the woman said and Jason instantly stopped pacing and glared at the rug, his mind going to Frank. 

 

“That little puke,” he mumbled under his breath. “Oh, lovely,” he said to the woman with a smile. “Would it be possible for me to get a copy of that bill. Just so I can give it to my boyfriend. He wants to file it,” Jason said, lying through his teeth.

 

“We can email him a copy right now. Do you have his email address?” She asked.

 

Jason gave her his own email, saying it was Gerard’s and then got off the phone with her. He printed out the piece of paper and looked to it, seeing the balance had previous been a little over a hundred thousand dollars. 

 

“Where’d you get that amount of money?” Jason muttered to himself before he pushed his chair over to his desk. He picked up his phone and punched in the numbers he needed, listening to the line ring until someone picked up on the other end.

 

“Yes, Richard. This is Jason,” he said and hummed as the person happily greeted him. “Yes, Gerard’s working out perfectly and Mikey all the more,” he smiled contently. “Thank you for them by the way,” he said, laughing when Richard responded with one of his normal jokes.”Hey, listen, I need you to find out information about someone for me. He’s a friend of Gerard’s. His name’s Frank Iero,” Jason said and waited for Richard’s response. “I don’t know how it’s spelt,” Jason snapped a little. 

 

“No, I can’t ask Gerard. He’s not allowed to see him anymore,” Jason said, running his fingers through his hair. “Yes, he’s turning out a lot better than the last ones you found for me. Well, you were right when you said his little brother had stacked up some bills. Uh-huh. Well, thank you, Richard. Yeah, just call me when you find out about that Iero kid. Thanks. Bye.” 

 

Jason hung up the phone and looked back to the paid bill lying on his desk. He reached forward and snatched up a pen from it’s holder on his desk before he leaned over the document and wrote on it. _”Merry Christmas, Gerard.”_ He smirked at it, knowing Gerard would be so overjoyed and might start listening to him better, feeling guilty. 

 

Jason’s eyes glanced over to the drawer of his desk and he unlocked it before he pulled it open, taking out a thick file. He leafed through it for a few moments until he found the pictures of Gerard and Mikey his friend Richard had snapped for him and some that he had added on his own. He had paid Richard a good deal to find him a young man in need with a young child. Richard was into light human trafficking and he had set everything up for Jason to bump into Gerard. Mikey wasn’t Gerard’s child but the situation they were in made it easy for Jason to swoop in and control things. Sure enough, Gerard had moved in with him in a month, and he was easily control by emotions. 

 

If Gerard got to a point that he seemed ready to leave, Jason would show him affection, tell him he was beautiful, and Gerard would melt right back into him. Jason had made Gerard dinner last night, to spoil him. He didn’t let him eat a lot but he’d put a few crushed up sleeping pills in it. Once Gerard was out, Jason had made Mikey a milk shake with a roofie in it. Jason thought back to the night before with Mikey and worried he may have been a little too rough on him. Mikey had cried out and Jason remembered the sound had made his heart stop for a moment. 

 

Jason just sighed out as he looked to the pictures he had of Mikey. He had taken some of the boy last night. He looked at the one he had snapped when he was done with Mikey and the young boy was laying in the bed. Jason got up and locked his office door before he unzipped his pants.

* * *

“Gerard?” Mikey asked as he sat at the bar, watching Gerard hurriedly cook dinner. They had slept a little later than they had meant to, and Jason would be home any minute. 

 

“Yes, Mikey,” Gerard answered as he banged his wrist off the counter and hissed as it ached in his cast. 

 

“Are you okay?” Mikey asked with a frown, forgetting what he was going to say. 

 

“Y-Yeah, it’s fine,” Gerard mumbled as he felt it throbbing. He knew Jason would be home in twenty minutes and if dinner wasn’t done, he would be upset with Gerard. Things had been good the last few nights, he didn’t want to ruin them by messing things up. 

 

“My tummy hurts,” Mikey said a moment later with a whiny tone. He rubbed at it and huffed out as he leaned his head on the counter. “My bottom hurts too,” he whimpered. Mikey felt like he really had to go to the bathroom but each time he tried to set on the toilet he felt pain and he couldn’t get anything to come out. 

 

Gerard would have normally went over to comfort his little brother but he didn’t have time. He would be lucky if he could finish cooking by the time Jason got home. He got the plates out of the cupboard and the silverware before he went to the dining room and began setting the table. He then got out the glasses and nearly knocked them over since his hands were shaking so bad. He backed up before he remembered to grab napkins and salt and pepper.

 

“Gee,” Mikey fussed, wanting his brother’s attention. “I have to go potty,” he whimpered out. 

 

“Then go!” Gerard snapped and pointed down the hall to the bathroom. 

 

“But it hurts,” Mikey whined, his eyes watering a little. He really was in pain and his brother wasn’t showing him a care. 

 

“Jesus, Mikey,” Gerard said with a sigh as he began stirring the veggies he had in a pan, his wrist still throbbing. “What do you want me to do? Hold your hand while you try to go?!” He turned around and glared at Mikey.

 

Mikey had never seen his brother look at him so angrily and it made him feel guilty. He looked down before he hopped off the stool, he couldn’t help the small whine that came from his mouth as his backside burned. He slowly walked down the hall to the bathroom and shut the door. 

 

He whimpered as he slowly got down his pants and walked over to the toilet. Forcing through the pain and discomfort of getting himself to bend enough to sit. He felt hot tears run down his cheeks as he tried to push a little but more pain cut through him. He kept crying as he forced himself through it, hoping he would feel better when he was finished. 

 

He felt like he’d only been in there a few moments when there was a knock on the door. “Mikey?” Came Jason’s voice and Mikey instantly felt like he couldn’t breath. He didn’t know why but the thought of Jason coming in while he didn’t have his pants up made him scared.

 

“I’ll be out in a minute,” he said, trying to sound normal even with the waves of pain still coming. After a few more minutes, he had managed to go a little and it helped his stomach feel less cramped and tight. He got up from the toilet when he was finished and noted there was a little blood in the water. He just flushed the toilet and fixed his pants, knowing he didn’t want to bug Gerard when he was so angry. He figured it was just something to do with his chemo and he would be alright. He figured if it was really a big deal, Gerard would have helped him.

* * *

Jason was watching Mikey through dinner, he saw how the boy seemed a bit distant. He worried he hadn’t given him enough of the pills to make him black out entirely. He also noted the boy's limp when he came into the room and was glad that Gerard seemed to pay it no mind. 

 

“So, are you excited for Christmas, Mikey?” Jason asked with a smile. “It’s only about five days away.” 

 

Mikey hadn’t realized Christmas was so close and he nodded. His mind instantly went to the presents from Frank that were in his closet, hidden. “When will we pick out a tree?” 

 

“Oh, I have a fake one,” Jason commented. “It’s in storage, I’ll have someone bring it up and you can decorate it,” he said with a smile, taking a bite of his dinner. “It’s delicious, baby.” Jason said to Gerard before he leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on the other’s lips. Jason saw Gerard’s big smile and knew that he must feel pleased with himself. 

 

“Gerard and I always pick out a real tree though,” Mikey said, frowning a little. He didn’t want a plastic tree. 

 

“It’s amazing you could afford that,” Jason said, turning his attention to Gerard again. He sipped his drink quietly, wanting Mikey to drop it. He didn’t want a live tree in his home. 

 

“I would...work extra,” Gerard said quietly and he looked down to his plate. 

 

“Mikey, you should have more respect for your brother,” Jason said as he looked to Mikey and set down his drink. “You knew he was having sex with people for money and you asked for an expensive tree?” Jason looked up as he heard a fork clatter at both place settings.

 

Gerard looked like he was on the verge of tears as he looked to Jason. “What?” Jason asked coyly. 

 

Mikey looked to his big brother and he couldn’t think of anything to say. He’d heard people in the neighborhood talk about those people, people who would go out and touch other people for money. Mikey never understood it, it had made him think badly of those people. He couldn’t understand why anyone would do that, it was gross. Now he was looking to his big brother and he was being told that Gerard did that stuff. Mikey instantly got up from his chair and ran to his room, slamming the door. 

 

“Oh, fuck,” Gerard sobbed before he hid his face in his hands and cried. He had known that one day Mikey was going to figure it out but he had hoped that day would never come. He had his eyes closed but all he could see was his little brother’s sad, disgusted face, and it made everything so much worse.

 

“Oh, baby. I’m sorry, I thought he knew,” Jason whispered and rubbed at Gerard’s back. He made sure to pull the boy close to him, hiding his smirk. 

 

“N-No,” Gerard whined and he wanted to hit Jason, to pull away but he couldn’t because Jason was being sweet. He was caring for him when he didn’t deserve it because even his little brother thought he was disgusting. 

 

“I’m sorry, baby. I love you so much,” Jason whispered before he placed a gentle kiss in Gerard’s hair. He couldn’t help but smile because he enjoyed the sound of Gerard sobbing, far too much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone had a good Thanksgiving!


	36. Chapter 36

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***TRIGGER WARNING. THIS CHAPTER HAS DISTURBING CONTENT. DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE TO RAPE AND CHILD ABUSE. ***

Jason was getting shaky, he knew that much. Mikey was sitting on his lap, watching a movie, and he was trying not to get hard. Mikey had been distant from Gerard for the last few days, ever since he found out his brother had been a prostitute and Gerard was more than depressed. Jason had given him a pill to help him sleep and he was currently out but he didn’t have a roofie that he could give Mikey. 

Jason glanced to the Christmas tree in the corner that was decorated and thought about all the presents he had boughten for the boy. Tomorrow was Christmas Eve and Jason felt like he deserved something from the boy, for buying him all the toys he was going to get. 

Mikey shifted on Jason’s lap a little bit and laid his head on his shoulder. Jason knew the young boy was seeking comfort and closeness but it was getting hard to contain himself. He started rubbing at the boys back and he seemed okay with that, he just kept watching his show. It was when his hand slipped down a little that Mikey moved away a little and looked to Jason. 

“Don’t touch my bottom. It’s sore,” he said quietly with a frown. Jason wondered if Mikey could remember a bit of their last night together because he seemed more shy with his privates. He didn’t like anyone in the bathroom with him when he was washing and he didn’t like Gerard to help him change anymore. 

“I know. I was trying to rub it to make it feel better,” Jason said with a little smile before he placed a gentle kiss to the side of Mikey’s head. 

“It’ll help?” Mikey asked curiously as he seemed to inch a little closer to Jason.

“Yeah, baby,” Jason whispered and gently started to rub at Mikey’s bottom again. The boy seemed a bit uncomfortable but began to relax a little after a few moments.

* * *

Jason sighed out softly as he reached down and picked up his shirt from the floor. He looked back to see Mikey laying completely still on the couch, not making a sound. He hung his head a little and cursed quietly, the boy would certainly remember this. He hadn’t prepped the boy properly, hardly at all, he had just crammed in, and Mikey had felt wonderful like that. 

“Michael, you better not tell your brother about this,” Jason said with a firm voice and saw Mikey hug himself, like he’d just been awoken from his mind. The boy curled up into the fetal position and started crying, Jason could see blood coming from his hole, mixing with his cum. He looked away from the boy.

“I’ll tell him how much you wanted it,” Jason said, getting closer to the boy who flinched and whimpered.

“No,” Mikey weakly whined and buried his face against the cushion. “Gee,” he weakly whimpered, like his brother would magically appear to save him. 

“If you tell anyone,” Jason said before he roughly grabbed Mikey and rolled him over, making the boy scream a little in fear. “I will fucking kill your brother! Do you understand me?” Jason hollered and Mikey sobbed loudly before he nodded and cried more. “I’m not kidding, Mikey. I will slit his fucking throat! Then I’ll kill you, do you want that?” Mikey sobbed more and shook his head. “Good boy.” 

“You’re a little slut, just like your brother,” Jason said as he stood, pulling up his boxers. “Now get up, you need to shower,” Jason snapped. He watched Mikey roll over and wince before he slowly eased his feet onto the floor. He whimpered the whole time and when he stood he was nearly sobbing.

“J-Jason, it h-hurts,” he stuttered out and Jason watched blood start racing down his legs. 

Jason figured he must had torn something in Mikey and just prayed it wasn’t serious. He picked the boy up and carried him into the bathroom before he set him in the shower and turned it on. Mikey slowly sat down since his legs were shaking so bad and then curled up on his side. He whimpered and hid his face as his body kept shaking horribly. 

“You asked for this, Mikey,” Jason said, kneeling down to the boy. “And you liked it,” he whispered, he noted that Mikey cried louder. “You got all hard for me and then you came. You’re so disgusting,” Jason spat and the boy shook more and continued to cry loudly. 

Jason heard the door to the bathroom creak open and turned to see Gerard. He looked dazed and out of it but it didn’t stop Jason’s heart from jumping into his throat. 

“What’s wrong with Mikey?” Gerard whispered tiredly as he heard his little brother crying in the tub.

Jason quickly guided Gerard out of the bathroom and away from Mikey’s sobs. “Sh, baby. He just had a nightmare and wet the bed. He’s getting cleaned up. I’ve got him. You shouldn’t be up, baby,” Jason cooed lovingly as he carried Gerard back to his bed and laid him down. 

“Is he okay? Does he need me?” Gerard asked with his tired voice. Jason knew Gerard was out of it but was impressed by how much the man cared for his little brother. It only made him smile more as he thought about how he’d just ruined Mikey on the couch he’d fucked Gerard on previously. 

“No, baby. I’ll get him to sleep,” Jason cooed. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Gerard whispered before his eyes closed and he was out again. 

Jason went back to the bathroom and saw Mikey was gone. He followed the small trail of water into Mikey’s room and saw him under his bed. He was clutching onto his stupid, stuffed pig and Jason rolled his eyes. He walked over to Mikey’s bed and pulled back the covers before he pulled out his dick from his boxers and pissed on the sheets. 

He looked back under the bed to Mikey when he was leaving. “I mean it, Mikey. If you tell anyone, Gerard’s going to die,” Jason said. 

Mikey cried and hid his face into his stuffed pig before Jason closed his bedroom door.

* * *

Gerard didn’t know what had happened to Mikey the night before but his little brother had latched onto him the second he had woken up that morning and wouldn’t let go. Gerard was cooking breakfast and Mikey had his arms tightly around his brother with his face buried into his side.

“Did you have a bad dream?” Gerard asked quietly and he felt Mikey hesitate before he nodded his head against his side. “I’m sorry, baby,” Gerard whispered and gently rubbed at Mikey’s back. 

Gerard knew it must have been a really bad dream because Mikey had nearly ignored him the last few days, now it was like he never wanted to let Gerard go. Even when Gerard would walk across the kitchen to get something, Mikey just stayed with him, holding tightly. 

“Good morning,” Jason called happily and Gerard smiled at him, though his smile sunk when he felt Mikey shake a little. 

“Morning, baby,” Gerard said before he leaned over the counter to kiss Jason good morning. 

“What’s up with him?” Jason asked, motioning to Mikey with a small smile.

“Bad dream,” Gerard whispered with a frown and Jason nodded, understandingly. 

“Well, tomorrow’s Christmas, Mikey. Are you excited?” Jason asked with a smile to the young boy. Mikey didn’t respond though, he just kept his face buried into Gerard’s side. 

Gerard was nervous that Jason would get angered and gently pushed his little brother away, making him fuss. “Go sit by Jason. It’s almost breakfast,” he said softly to Mikey. 

Mikey looked like he might just cry when he glanced to Jason but suddenly hung his head and walked around the bar. Gerard put his hands on his hips and eyed Mikey, watching his movements. He seemed shaky and like he was in pain but he pushed himself up into his stool and Gerard dropped it. He turned back around to prepare their plates. 

When Gerard handed over their food Jason thanked him and Mikey gave him a weak smile before he began to eat his food, keeping his eyes down. Gerard was really worried about him but he knew that Jason didn’t like him to baby Mikey, so he remained quiet.

* * *

After breakfast was over, Mikey had gone to his room, and as Gerard had been going around, cleaning up the house, he didn’t give him that much thought. When he noticed it was lunch time, he started making something before he went in to get him. Gerard saw Mikey’s small, socked foot hanging out from under the bed and smiled gently. He quietly walked over towards the bed before he glanced into Mikey’s closet and red paper caught his eyes. He leaned in before he uncovered a present and smiled, he figured that Jason must have taken Mikey out to get him something for Gerard. It warmed his heart, thinking that Jason would do something like that for them. 

Gerard gently leaned down and looked to Mikey’s sleeping face before he smiled gently and brushed his hand over Mikey’s soft cheek. He didn’t know what was happening with his little brother lately and it really bothered him. Mikey had had a dream that had scared him so bad that he had wet the bed. It had been a long time since that had happened and Mikey always came for his older brother when he was frightened, this time he hadn’t. He had woken Jason instead. Gerard wouldn’t deny that he was a little saddened by it; it made him wonder if Mikey still loved him as much. 

He imagined that Mikey was still distant from him because he had found out that his older brother was trash. This thought made Gerard frown and retract his hand, he didn’t want to touch Mikey with his dirty hands. He rubbed them on his pant legs like it would clean them from all the filthy things they had done. 

With a soft sigh, Gerard glanced back to his little brother and found a sad smile on his lips. He glanced down to a dark spot on Mikey’s blanket and scrunched up his face, it looked a little like dried blood and this concerned Gerard. 

“Mikey, baby,” Gerard whispered and pet his little brother’s cheek again. “Mikey, wake up,” Gerard said before he gently shook his little brother. 

Mikey cried out in fright before he saw his brother was the one shaking him. “H-Hi, Gee,” Mikey whispered tiredly as he looked to his older brother. 

“Mikey, baby, is this blood?” Gerard asked with a concerned expression, point to the part of the blanket that had a patch of it. Mikey glanced to it and then to his brother, staying silent. “Mikey, answer me?” Gerard said, his voice a little more firm. 

“No, Gee,” Mikey said with a frown and shook his head.

“What is it then?” Gerard asked, gauging his little brother’s face for a reaction. He didn’t think Mikey would lie to him but the substance did look a lot like blood. Then again, he knew his little brother probably wouldn’t lie about something serious like that. 

“I don’t know,” Mikey said quietly and then looked down. 

“How did it get there?” Gerard tried with a frown. 

“I don’t know,” Mikey said and continued to look downward. “I just saw it last night. I wasn’t bleeding though,” Mikey said weakly. 

It was at this moment that Mikey pressed himself further back and Gerard frowned as his little brother seemed to shake a little. “Mikey, what’s..?” Gerard started but then he felt watched, he turned seeing Jason standing in the doorway. 

“Oh, hey,” Gerard said quietly before he glanced back from Mikey to Jason. “I just...I was getting him for lunch,” Gerard said, trying not to seem like he was babying Mikey. 

“Well, let’s go, Mikey,” Jason said and Mikey slowly eased himself out from under the bed but he was still shaking horribly.

“Baby, are you alright?” Gerard whispered and gently brushed back Mikey’s cap to feel his forehead. 

“I’m fine, Gee,” Mikey whimpered out as he got himself up, fully standing. 

“Alright, well…,” Gerard ignored the fact that Mikey wasn’t being honest with him. “Go on and set down, lunch is ready.” Mikey nodded before he headed towards the door and seemed to timidly walk by Jason. 

“I don’t know what’s wrong with him,” Gerard whispered as he watched Mikey slowly ease himself up onto his stool by the bar. They were far enough away that Mikey couldn’t hear them. 

“He’s probably just stuck on his bad dream,” Jason whispered before he lovingly massaged at Gerard’s shoulders. 

“I know but it’s the day before Christmas. I figured he’d be running all over the place...happy,” Gerard whispered, seeming sad. Mikey was normally a loud bundle of energy the day before Christmas, today he seemed distant and like he didn’t care. 

“I know but maybe he’s just trying not to get excited. I can’t imagine his last few Christmases with you were that fun,” Jason whispered quietly.

Gerard frowned and looked down, knowing what Jason was saying to be true. The first Christmas after their parents had passed had been spent on the street and Gerard had done all he could for Mikey. While Mikey had sat in a diner and ate a warm dinner, the first one in a long while, Gerard had gone into an alley with a man. He had needed the money to get Mikey a gift, it had been Christmas Eve. Gerard remembered how disappointed in himself he had felt when he handed Mikey the only package he had to give him, wrapped horribly in the stores plastic bag. His little brother had smiled though and had been very excited with his new toy. Gerard felt even worse in himself when he remembered that it was stolen less than a week later while they had been sleeping in an alleyway. 

“He’ll be excited when he sees the presents,” Jason tried and urged Gerard to smile a little. 

“I know,” Gerard said but as he looked to his little brother, he wondered if he would be.

* * *

Mikey had gone back into his room right after lunch and when Gerard had went in to check on him just a few moments later, he was already asleep. Gerard was trying to ignore this sick feeling in his gut as he looked to his sleeping little brother. He didn’t know what was wrong but he knew something wasn’t right. The way Mikey seemed to become timid around Jason reminded Gerard of himself when Jason would come around. He slowly checked Mikey’s face and arms but there weren’t any bruises on him. 

He leaned down under the bed a little more and gently lifted Mikey’s shirt. He noticed a few small bruises on Mikey’s lower back and wondered how the could have gotten there. He frowned softly as he looked to Mikey and he just wanted to curl up with his little brother. He didn’t want to believe anything wrong was happening to Mikey, so he forced himself up from the floor and left his little brother’s room. 

Gerard stood at the end of the hall and looked into the living room, staring at the lights on the Christmas tree. He had fought for this, for so long he had tried to find something nice for him and Mikey. Was this supposed to be it? Was Gerard supposed to be abused and mistreated while his little brother lived in constant fear? Gerard knew it wasn’t supposed to be like this and he knew he could leave and he could go back to working the street corners. But he didn’t know what he would do in the meantime. Who would watch Mikey? He couldn’t bring Mikey out onto the streets again. Gerard looked down before he rubbed at his eyes. There was no need for him to leave. Mikey was cared for and soon enough he would come around, he was just sick from his cancer, Gerard was sure of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this chapter was brutal. It starts getting better after this.


	37. Chapter 37

Christmas, it was Christmas morning and Gerard was laying still in his bed with a frown on his face. He could hear Jason’s snores beside him, he could hear the city beginning to slowly wake up outside, but there was a sound missing. Gerard was biting his lip and just waiting for the sound of his little brother’s excited footsteps. It was almost six-thirty in the morning and he hadn’t so much as heard his little brother stir. Gerard was waiting, praying, just hoping that Mikey would wake up today and be happy. 

Then he heard it, there was a quiet sound from the end of the hall, like a door opening but more distant. Gerard slowly pulled back the covered before he stood up out of bed and made his way to the bedroom door. He tiptoed out into the hall and then down to Mikey’s door before he gently knocked and opened the door. 

Mikey smiled in a worn way at his older brother as he was sitting on the bed. “Do you want to open, Frank’s presents?” Mikey whispered to his brother, knowing that Jason wasn’t awake yet. 

“Frank’s?” Gerard asked quietly, his face screwed up with confusement. “When did Frank give you these?” Gerard hissed as he came over to his little brother and sat with him on his bed. 

“A few weeks ago at the park. He had promised to take me shopping but you said we couldn’t see him anymore,” Mikey said, frowning a little. 

Gerard looked down and frowned a bit, he missed Frank, so bad but he had figured their friendship was over. Frank had never called him back. Gerard looked up to his little brother and took him in, he looked worn out, thinning, and pale. Gerard realized he probably looked about the same, just with a cast on his arm and more bruises. 

“I miss Frank,” Gerard quietly admitted to his little brother.

“Me too,” Mikey whispered before he slowly crawled over to his big brother, holding onto a box that seemed heavy. “This one's for you. It’s from me,” Mikey said with a smile and he leaned his head onto his brother’s shoulder. 

Gerard couldn’t help his smile, his little brother was close to him and so warm. Gerard kissed the top of Mikey’s head before he looked to the heavy present on his lap. “Should I open it now?” He teased and smiled, looking to Mikey for an answer.

“Yeah,” Mikey said with a smile and he nodded before he watched his older brother begin to tear back the paper. Gerard uncovered a solid wooden box that was a deep cherry color. 

Gerard looked at it confused before he slid back the wooden top and a set of expensive pencils came into view, set inside the wooden case immaculately. Gerard choked a little on his breath as he looked to it and his eyes watered a little. His fingers went out and delicated touched the pencils, ghosting over them.

“Do you like it, Gee?” Mikey asked, nudging his brother, hoping he hadn’t upset him. “I figured...you could start drawing again...since you like it,” Mikey tried to explain, certain his brother was now sad. 

“Mikey, they’re beautiful.” Gerard said with a little sob before he reached over and hugged onto his little brother. “I love you, so much,” Gerard whispered before he kissed him on the cheek. 

“I love you too,” Mikey said with a big smile, proud of himself. He was glad that Frank had gotten his brother such a good set, he seemed to love it. 

Gerard pulled away and glanced back to the set in front of him. He knew Frank had purchased this for Mikey to give to him and it broke his heart. Frank was such a good person and Gerard missed him so much, he briefly thought of trying to go visit Frank. 

“This one's from Frank,” Mikey whispered and he held out an envelope to Gerard. He watched his older brother hesitate before taking it into his own hands.

Gerard turned the envelope over and saw his name written across it in Frank’s handwriting, he smiled a little bit at it before he opened the card. Papers slipped out once he opened the top and he caught them in his hand before he looked back to the card, reading over Frank’s words. There was an apology from Frank and Gerard was confused about Frank saying that Gerard had blocked his number. Then he thought about how his phone had been broken and Jason had got him a new one, he was boiling on the inside. Frank mentioned the papers being Gerard’s present and told him that he missed him, before he wished Gerard and Mikey a Merry Christmas. 

Gerard closed the card and opened the papers on his lap. It was a letter from the hospital, telling Gerard that all of his bills were paid in full and that all future appointments and visits would be covered and paid for. There was no big total or anything else but Gerard felt like he had the largest weight lifted from his body and he stared at the paper in disbelief before he let out a shaky sob. 

“What are you both doing in here?” Gerard heard and he looked up to the doorway to see Jason standing there. “Where did these gifts come from?!” Jason asked pointing to the pencil set and what Gerard was holding. “Let me see this,” Jason snapped before he ripped the papers out of Gerard’s hands. 

“Baby-,” Gerard tried but Jason was already looking at the papers.

“Frank?!” Jason turned on Gerard and seemed to tower over him. “That fucking little prick! What?! You been having him over when I’m not home?!” Jason screamed and Gerard tried to say no and shake his head but Jason slapped him. “Huh?!” He threw Gerard down roughly and started kicking him. “You think you can fuck around on me?!” 

Jason picked up the pencil set in the wooden case and threw it at the wall, it smashed and Gerard sobbed as the pencil littered the floor and wooden case laid broken. 

“I got them at the park! Frank gave them to me!” Mikey tried as he was crying, seeing his older brother hurt. 

“You little shit,” Jason said, gritting through his teeth.

“Leave him alone,” Gerard forced out through his hoarse throat as tears came from his eyes. 

Jason glared down at Gerard before he bent down and grabbed Gerard by his hair and began to repeatedly smash his face against the floor. “You don’t tell me what to do!” 

“Stop!” Mikey screamed before he jumped onto Jason’s back and tried holding around his neck. He sunk his teeth into Jason’s shoulder and he heard the man scream. 

Jason growled and slammed Mikey against the doorframe repeatedly, hearing the boy wheeze and scream in pain before he reached back and grabbed the disoriented boy. He flung him over his shoulder and onto the floor with a harsh thud, the boy didn’t move.

“M-Mikey,” Gerard sobbed and tried crawling towards his little brother. “No,” Gerard cried as he didn’t see his little brother move. He got to him and pulled him up into his arms but Mikey didn’t open his eyes or move. Gerard sobbed uncontrollably as he saw his little brother laying completely still and hardly breathing. 

“That’s what that little shit gets!” Jason hollered as he watched Gerard holding the small body. “He should know by now to behave!”

“What have you done to him!? I knew you were hurting him,” Gerard sobbed, looking away from Jason and back to his little brother. “I just didn’t want to believe it,” he cried. 

“I’ve been fucking him,” Jason spat, smugly. He saw Gerard look up at him with his jaw dropped, a look of horror on his face. He then sobbed harshly before he leaned his face down to his little brother. 

“You’re lying,” he cried and pulled Mikey closer. “You didn’t do that. You didn’t hurt my baby brother,” Gerard whined out hysterically as he began rocking but then he thought over the last few weeks. Mikey seeming hazy, being sore, not wanting to go to the bathroom and being bloated. Gerard wanted to throw up, he felt like he could if he just let himself. He had only moved in with Jason and had stayed through the abuse in hopes that his little brother would have a better life, now knowing what Jason had done Gerard was broken. Not for himself but for what had happened to his little brother, this was all Gerard’s fault. He’d been so busy paying attention to making Jason happy that he hadn’t given his brother enough attention. 

“I did, I fucked him on the couch right where I fucked you and he came just like you,” Jason spat at Gerard who flinched in disgust and shock. “While you were fucking sleeping in the bedroom.” Jason knelt down beside Gerard with a smirk on his face. “And there’s nothing you can do about it,” he hissed.

Gerard was staring at the wall, his sadness was beginning to bubble into anger and he grit his teeth as his hand felt for a pencil on the floor. He found it and gripped it tight before he turned and looked to Jason and spit in his face. Jason swung for him but Gerard was faster, he drove the pencil right into Jason’s eye before he shoved him back, knocking him over. 

He heard Jason screaming in pain as he scrambled to his feet, clutching Mikey to him. He ran for the door and unlocked it before he ran out into the hall sobbing. He quickly went to the elevator and got inside as he heard the door to the apartment open down the hall.

“I’m going to kill you,” Jason screamed as he ran towards the elevator. He could heard Gerard sobbing and repeatedly pounding the button for the elevator to go down. The doors closed right as Jason reached them. 

Gerard sobbed as he held Mikey close to him and shook. What was he going to do? What had he done? How could this have happened? 

It was Christmas and once again Gerard found himself out on the streets with his little brother.

* * *

Mikey was sitting in a diner, blankly staring to the big fogged up window beside him before he looked back down to the plate of food in front of him. He wasn’t too hurt from Jason beating on him but he was still sore as he sat in the small booth. His brother had left him here for a little while, saying he would be back, so Mikey kept staring out the window, hoping that Gerard would appear soon.

* * *

Gerard’s face was pressed against a cold brick wall and he was using everything he had not to just start sobbing as a man was thrusting into him. He was back to this. He was back to begging men to fuck him for pay. He was so tired and he was so weak, he’d been doing this all day. He had left Jason’s in his pajamas, so he slept with a few men he would have normally passed on to get money for clothing for him and Mikey. Then he had slept with a few more to get Mikey a decent coat. Then another to get his brother a meal. He had felt horrible setting his unconscious little brother down on the alley floor to have sex only a few feet from him but he had had to do it. He knew Mikey had woken up and seen him at the end of it, the man pulling out and Gerard shyly pulling up his pants. Though he didn’t much figure it mattered. He knew his little brother must hate him enough by now. 

The man pulled out of Gerard once he was finished and fixed his own pants before he shot a term of gratitude in Gerard’s direction and then left. Gerard looked down at himself before he sniffled and slowly shimmied up his tight jeans and buttoned them. He needed a little more money, he wanted to get Mikey a place to sleep tonight. He went back out to the corner and hugged himself as the cold wind blew by. He knew he should have gotten himself a jacket but he couldn’t waste money on himself when his little brother was without a home. 

“Oh, honey. I never wanted to see you here again,” Gerard heard from behind him and turned to see Chrystal. He looked to her and was going to speak but a whimper came out and he just started sobbing. “Come here, baby,” she whispered before she pulled him into her. She could see he looked messed up. He had bruises new and fading along with a cast on his arm. “What happened?” She asked him quietly as she rubbed his back.

“J-Jason...we moved in with him and he’s...he…,” Gerard just started crying and hid his face back into Chrystal’s shoulder. “I can’t go back,” he weakly whispered. 

“You don’t need to, baby,” Chrystal said, understanding what had been happening with Gerard. “You can come stay with me until you get back on your feet,” she offered and smiled at him. “I’d love to have you and little Mikey,” she said with a smile. 

“He’s at the diner down the road,” Gerard whispered quietly and his mind instantly lingered on what had happened to Mikey when they were with Jason. “Pl-Please be...He….He’s not talking much…,” Gerard said in defeat, not wanting to tell anyone what had happened. Mikey hadn’t uttered a single sound since he had woken up and Gerard feared he never would again. 

“Did...Jason hurt him too?” Chrystal asked cautiously but she figured she struck something when Gerard hid his face and started sobbing again. “Okay, honey,” she said and pulled Gerard close, trying to fix her mistake. “I’m sorry,” she whispered and pet his hair. “You're both going to be okay. We’ll go back to my place, get you something to eat, you can shower?” She suggested with a soft smile and leaned down until Gerard would look into her eyes and he nodded. “You just need some rest, baby. It’ll help, I promise.” 

“O-Okay,” Gerard whispered before he looked up towards the diner.

* * *

Mikey silently followed his brother into Chrystal’s house and looked around once they got there. Her house was nice and cozy, Mikey felt a little better knowing that he wouldn’t have to sleep outside with his brother like that one Christmas. 

“There’s a spare room with a full in it. You both can sleep in there if you’d like.” Chrystal said to them both in a quiet tone, seeing as Mikey wasn’t talking at all, and when Gerard did it was in this hushed, quiet voice. Chrystal had been with an abusive man, she understood Gerard’s meek, quiet demeanor. It was safer to seem invisible and unthreatening. She just wished one of the boys would whole heartedly smile but she understood. 

“Th-That sounds amazing. Th-Thank you so much,” Gerard said and his eyes watered a little more. “I’m really sorry about this,” he muttered meekly. 

“It’s Christmas and you’re my friend, it’s the least I could do,” Chrystal said with a smile.

Mikey slowly walked by his brother and into the room Chrystal had pointed to. He took off his boots before he silently curled up in the bed. 

“He hates me,” Gerard whispered sadly and tears started running down his face again. 

“No he doesn’t,” Chrystal said, trying to reassure Gerard that he was fine.

“J-Jason...he…,” Gerard looked down again and seemed like he couldn’t speak another word or he would just explode apart into nothing.

“Here, let’s have a drink and we’ll talk,” she said with a small smile before she went over to the freezer and got out some vodka. 

It took a few drinks but soon Gerard was sitting at the table just shaking his head with the same tears gently flowing down his face. “Jason...he was...he...m-molested my little brother,” Gerard let out before he gently sobbed into his hand. “H-He touched him and he hurt him and I didn’t even notice it,” Gerard whispered brokenly before he placed one of his hands over his eyes. 

“He was hurting you too, baby. It’s not your fault that you didn’t notice,” Chrystal said honestly. 

“But I knew he was a bad man and I stayed. I let him be around Mikey...I let him...hurt him,” Gerard said, his voice breaking. 

“You never imagined he was that bad. You thought you were doing what was right for your brother, Gerard. You wanted him to have a safe home and environment. You thought you were giving him that, even if it hurt you,” Chrystal said with a frown. She sighed when Gerard just remained quiet. “Frank said there was something not right about him,” she muttered before rubbing her eyes.

Gerard’s head lifted a little at the mention of Frank’s name, he missed him. God he ached for him but then he wondered, maybe Frank was just like Jason. He seemed sweet and then if Gerard got close, he would hurt him. Gerard nearly flinched at the thought. 

“He misses you,” Chrystal whispered quietly to Gerard, looking to him. “Everytime I saw him, I would ask if he’d heard from you or if he’d seen you guys, he would just look so sad,” she sighed.

“J-Jason...he blocked Frank’s number from my phone,” Gerard whispered as he kept his glance down, like he had for most of the last two months. “I...I didn’t know. I thought Frank was done with me. We...We fought,” he said and cried a little more, remembering how devastated Frank had looked when Gerard had kicked him out. 

“I know you did,” Chrystal said sadly. “He felt horrible about it. Said it was all his fault and that you would never forgive him, that he didn’t blame you.”

“No, it was my fault,” Gerard breathed before rubbing his eyes. “I was foolish.” 

Chrystal smiled crookedly before her clock chimed in the living room. Gerard glanced over to it and saw that it was midnight, he realized he had let Mikey down again, another failed Christmas. 

“I think that’s our sign to go to bed,” Chrystal said with a little smile before she stood and placed their glasses in the sink. “If you’re going to be working the streets again...you could stay here until you get on your feet. We look about the same size, you could borrow some outfits, if you want?”

Gerard thought about getting back into that life and it was already draining him but he knew his worth and he knew this was what he was good at. He nodded his head to her before he slowly stood.

“Merry Christmas, Chystal,” Gerard whispered sadly.

“Merry Christmas, Gerard,” she said back before she hugged him. “It’ll get better, baby. I promise.”


	38. Chapter 38

Gerard stood out under a street lamp and looked down the sidewalk to either side of him, it was a slow night but he had made some money earlier, so he wasn’t overly worried. He’d been staying with Chrystal for a couple of weeks now and Gerard was happy to say nothing had come from Jason’s side of things. Gerard had been scared that Jason was going to send cops after him and that he would be arrested. If Jason had called them and told them that his prostitute boyfriend had stabbed him in the eye with a pencil, Gerard imagined the court case would go rather quickly. Gerard didn’t have money for a lawyer and even then, all Jason’s lawyer would have to do in court would be to ask Gerard how he had paid for his lawyer, and once people heard that he was a prostitute, he would be sent to jail for sure. Once again, Gerard was only afraid of going to jail because of what would happen to Mikey. He didn’t think about what would happen to himself in jail but what could happen to Mikey in foster care. 

Gerard was thinking about Frank too, a lot but he hadn’t seen him. Chrystal said that Frank had been gone for a couple of weeks. That he had gone on vacation, an after Christmas getaway or something like that. Frank had found someone to do his job for him while he was away but Gerard did his best to stay away from the guy. There was something about him, he didn’t look at the prostitutes like Frank did. These weren’t people to him, they were slabs of meat.

“Hey, Gerard.” Gerard jumped and turned to see that very man standing beside him. Gerard smiled politely as he tried to bring the man's name up in his head. 

“Hey, Tommy,” Gerard said, hoping that was correct. “How are you?”

“Oh, I’m just fine,” he said as he reached into the bags and took out some condoms. He handed them to Gerard who thanked him and put them in his pocket. 

Tommy seemed to stand there for a few moments like he wanted to say something before he just smiled a bit. “Well, good seeing you,” he said as he began walking around Gerard.

“Good seeing you too,” Gerard lied and eyed the man as he was walking away, he regretted it because then Tommy turned. Gerard figured his glance must have seemed inviting because Tommy was walking back with a boost of confidence. 

“Hey...Uh...how much do you charge? You know, for a fuck?” Tommy asked suddenly.

Gerard hid his frown and the warm feeling of discomfort that caked his insides. It seemed that all men, even the nice ones who volunteered to help the needy, wanted one thing. To get in his pants. 

“Oh...Uh...Usually for a quicky in the alley, it’s about $65,” Gerard said as he shifted uncomfortably.

“Oh come on, don’t I get a discount? I mean I bring you condoms and everything,” Tommy whined as he bounced a little. “Listen, I have $25, that sound good?” 

Gerard thought it sounded horrible but he just looked at the other man quietly for a second before he shrugged. He didn’t want to lose the supply of condoms and other items that were offered to him. He needed to keep in good terms with this guy in case Frank was gone for a long time. There was no way of knowing if Frank would ever return to the streets and that he wouldn’t just let Tommy do it from now on. “Sure,” he said before he took the money that was offered to him and he walked into the alley.

“Sweet,” Tommy said as he took the bag off from over his head and followed Gerard into a shadowy place.

* * *

Chrystal had tried to call Frank for weeks but his phone went straight to voicemail, she figured he must have left the country. It was just like Frank to forget to extend his phone plan. She was worried for the Way brother’s. Mikey needed help before it was too late. The boy still hadn’t uttered a word the whole time she’d been around him and if she got close to him, he held still but would shake horribly. He needed counseling or someone to help him get through this, Frank was good at that stuff. Frank could make people talk about anything. Gerard and Chrystal had both been trying but nothing was working. 

Chrystal had come home from the streets early, she knew Gerard was still out there and wondered when he’d be home. She received a text though, not too long after that said he was going home with a customer and would be back late tonight or early morning. Chystal told him to be safe and worried at her lip with her teeth. She looked to Mikey who was seated on the couch, watching cartoons without an expression on his face. She sighed before she dialed Frank’s number again. This time it rang, she tried not to look too excited as she quickly scurried to her room to see if he would answer. 

“Hello?” Came a rough voice through the phone. 

“Frank! Oh, thank God you’re back! It’s Chystal,” she said with a slightly breathless tone, sighing in relief.

“Oh, hey, honey. What’s up?” Frank asked, his voice still sounding deep. 

Chystal figured he must have been sleeping or something, maybe on the flight, she wasn’t sure. “I...I have the Way brother’s, they’re staying with me,” she said for starters before she sat down hard on her bed. 

“With you? What happened?” Frank asked, sounding worried. 

“I guess...Well I guess Jason wasn’t so nice after all. Gerard’s…he won’t really talk about it but he was beaten...and I think he must have been raped a couple of times, he’s not himself anymore,” Chrystal said with a frown and she felt bad sharing Gerard’s business but felt it was only fair for Frank to know since she was calling him in. “I mean fuck, he had a cast on his arm when he got here…”

“Jesus,” she heard Frank whisper in saddened disbelief. 

“Also, this is why I’m calling,” Chrystal said before she sighed out, her eyes watering. “He molested Mikey too…,” she said quietly, making sure Mikey wouldn’t hear. She heard Frank choke up over the line. “Frank...they need you. Mikey hasn’t talked since Christmas, it’s almost February. If anyone can make him talk, I know it’s you,” she said sadly. “Gerard’s gone right now but if you could just come over and help Mikey....that would be great,” she said before sighing again, trying to get rid of her emotions that were all building up. 

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll be over soon,” Frank said with a saddened voice. “Thank you, Chrystal,” he said to her.

Chrystal got up and went to her doorway, staring to Mikey who continued to stare at the TV but was shaking from Chrystal’s presence. “You’re welcome,” she whispered back.

* * *

_Gerard blinked a couple of times, his head feeling heavy and he was having a hard time remembering the events that lead up to him being asleep. He had been talking to Tommy, they had went into an alleyway, and then...nothing. He felt pain when he scrunched up his eyes, it was mostly his left temple that ached. He whimpered before he rolled a little, he must have been on a floor because his ribs were aching from where he had laid._

_“H-Hello?” He said quietly, blinking in the dark room, wondering if maybe he’d just gone home with a client and forgot._

_“Hey, honey,” Gerard heard and instantly tensed before he started sobbing, this had to be a nightmare. “Oh, baby, don’t cry,” he heard and then someone kneeled in front of him and he looked up before he cried harder._

_“I missed you,” Jason whispered to him as he leaned down against Gerard’s ear. “You’re lucky that pencil didn’t do anything too serious. I should be healed in a week or so more, you missed a lot of major stuff. Then again, you’re horrible at everything you do so how could you even do this right,” Jason laughed and Gerard cried harder._

_“That Tommy kid?” Jason stood and clicked on the light, they were in the office of Jason’s apartment. “He was really nice to go get you for me, and for only a couple thousand. Guess Frank really wasn’t paying him that well.”_

_Gerard was hardly listening to a word Jason was saying as he eased himself up but then realized his wrists were tied to the leg of Jason’s desk. Gerard looked up to Jason before he just broke down in sobs. “I wanna go home,” he whimpered brokenly before he tried pulling the rope that was tied to his wrists._

_“You can go home,” Jason said as he came around his desk and Gerard cowered and whimpered. “When I say so,” Jason said before he kissed the side of Gerard’s head, making him cry harder._

Gerard shot up and bed and hugged the sheet to him, he panted harshly and he felt the cold sweat running down his body. He panted and quickly looked around the room, there was no one besides the John who had paid for him to stay the night. He sighed out and closed his eyes, these nightmares seemed like they would never stop. He wanted to curl up and just cry but he felt his customer sit up and rub his back, the feeling giving him chills.

“You okay?” The guy asked and looked at Gerard. Gerard nodded and hummed a response, trying to just look cute, and shy, this was his job. “I remember when you were on the streets before but you look different now. You’re so thin and your eyes are so dark now. Are you into drugs or something?” 

Gerard weakly shook his head and looked down to his stomach, wondering if the man was being flattering. He looked at the line that was on his stomach from him sitting up and having his knees hugged to him but in his mind, it was just another roll of fat. “Just had a bad couple of months,” he whispered. “But we’re not supposed to be talking about me,” he said, gently gliding his hand over the man's chest and getting him to lay down. “It’s about you,” Gerard whispered before he gently sucked the tip of the man’s member into his mouth.

* * *

The knock on the door jumped Mikey beyond Chrystal’s belief. The boy had all but jumped behind the couch and cowered. “It’s okay, baby,” Chrystal whispered before she went to the door and checked through the peephole. When she saw Frank she opened the door for him and hugged him, it had been a while since they had seen each other and the situation made it worse. 

“Hey,” Chrystal whispered before she nodded her head towards Mikey. “He’s over there. You’re going to want to move slow,” she warned. 

Frank slowly turned and he laid his eyes on Mikey, his instantly wanting to water. The boy was curled up on the floor between the couch and the chair in the living room, hidden behind the coffee table. “M-Mikey,” Frank whispered gently and he kneeled so he wouldn’t look like he towered so high over the other boy. 

Mikey’s head peeked up and he looked to Frank but he also glanced around, like this was some sort of trap. He was scared, he didn’t want to be hurt like he had. He never thought anyone would do that to him, and he thought Jason had cared for him, it had all been a lie. How did adults lie so well? 

“Buddy,” Frank whispered, his voice shaking a little from his watering eyes. “I’ve missed you so much,” Frank confessed as his heart was aching in his chest. He just wanted to hug Mikey to him but he was waiting, he couldn’t force it on Mikey or the boy would freak out, and Frank understood that. 

Mikey inched closer and continued to look between Frank and Chystal, waiting for any sudden movements. He slowly eased his way closer to Frank before he reached out and latched onto Frank’s torso, then he let out this loud howl, and he sobbed loudly. 

Chystal eyes instantly watered at the sound and something felt like it popped in her chest. She slowly backed up towards her room and closed the door once she was inside, she figured Mikey might want to be alone with Frank. 

“I know, buddy. I know,” Frank whispered and he gently rubbed at Mikey’s back as his own eyes poured over. He sat himself down on the floor and let Mikey curl up on his lap. “You’re okay, baby,” Frank whispered and he placed a gentle kiss on top of Mikey’s head. 

“F-Frank,” Mikey quietly squeaked. “H-He hurt me really bad,” Mikey said, his eyes looking into Frank’s before he looked down and cried more. Frank felt part of his heart break as he saw Mikey’s tortured expression. “And Gerard...He’s not...He’s not Gerard anymore,” Mikey whispered brokenly before he hid his face into Frank’s shoulder. 

Frank hugged Mikey closely and he felt like he might just suffocate the boy from hugging him too tightly. “I love you, Mikey and I’m sorry that you both got hurt,” Frank whispered quietly as he rocked the boy.

“It’s okay,” Mikey whispered sadly before he sniffled. “Gerard got hurt worse than me,” he said quietly.

Frank bit his lip and closed his eyes, he didn’t want to imagine how fragile Gerard’s mind was at this point. He figured Gerard had only been with Jason for the sake of his little brother once the abuse had started and when Gerard found out about Mikey’s abuse, he must have left. He couldn’t imagine the immense pain and sorrow Gerard must have felt, knowing that his actions had lead to Mikey’s pain.


	39. Chapter 39

Gerard entered Chrystal’s house quiet since it was so late at night and shrugged out of his jacket with a quiet sigh. He was worn out and ready to just crash. He’d been unable to get back to sleep after his dream and had just gotten dressed and gotten himself home. He made his way silently through the house and entered the bathroom before he closed the door and began removing his clothes before he turned on the water to the shower and rubbed at his burning eyes. 

Gerard stepped into the shower and let out a relaxed sigh as he closed his eyes and just stood in the spray of water. He kept his eyes closed as he carefully swirled his wrist, feeling it ache. He knew he probably should have left the cast on a little longer but it wasn’t good for business. People would see him standing on the corner with his cast and think he had some sort of abusive pimp or boyfriend. Gerard had to stop himself from snorting, knowing that the judgment would actually be spot on. 

Gerard sat in the shower for a bit longer than normal, letting his mind run back over his horrifying dream, he swallowed to wet his dry throat. He knew it wouldn’t be long before something happened, something had to happen. Jason wouldn’t just let this go. He wouldn’t just quietly let Gerard slink off into the night after what had happened. Gerard was living in fear that he would be murdered, that the state would come, that someone would try to harm Mikey and the thought almost scared him enough to go back to Jason, to try and make things right. But he knew there wouldn’t be fixing what he had done. Jason would kill him if he saw him again, Gerard was pretty sure. 

Gerard had dried himself and dressed in his boxers and shirt before he walked out of the bathroom and into the cool hallway. He brought himself into Mikey’s room and felt around with his hands before he laid down in the bed with his little brother. It was dark in the room but it almost put Gerard at ease, simply because he felt like nothing else was there with him besides his brother. 

Gerard rolled over onto his side and spooned himself behind Mikey, nuzzling into the back of his neck. He had to run his hand over Mikey because he just didn’t feel right and he smelt different. It was then that the body he was feeling stirred and rolled over towards him. Gerard nearly fell from the bed as his heart jumped into his throat, wondering who this person was, what was going to happen. 

“Gerard?” Came a deep voice, raspy with sleep. “Is that you?”

Gerard wanted to shout and squirm away from the voice before his mind began to understand what he was hearing. “F-Frank?” He whimpered out, flinching a little in the dark as something warm touched his cheek. He realized they were fingers, gentle and soft on his skin and he lightly pressed into them. 

“I missed you,” Frank whispered and his voice sounded sad enough to crack Gerard’s heart into pieces. 

“I missed you too,” Gerard whispered back before he started crying silently. “Frank I’m so sorry for everything,” Gerard said, still keeping his voice low since he figured Mikey was there with them. 

“No,” Frank cooed gently and pulled Gerard into his chest. “I’m sorry. I had a bad feeling about Jason from the start and I didn’t say anything, I should have. I just...I thought it was because I was jealous of him. I didn’t...I didn’t want to ruin things for you,” he said in a hushed, saddened tone as he let his fingers gently run through Gerard’s hair. 

Gerard just continued to cry and bury himself into everything that was Frank. His chest was warm, his shirt was soft, and his touches so gentle, like Gerard was the most fragile thing he’d ever put his hands on. All of this made Gerard cry because of how safe he felt and because he knew that maybe with Frank near him, everything would be okay. 

“I thought you hated me,” Gerard whined out as he got himself closer to Frank, scared of what Frank might say back to him. Maybe Frank would realize that he didn’t care for Gerard afterall. The thought made Gerard sob out quietly and burying himself into Frank even more. 

“Of course I don’t hate you,” Frank whispered, gently lifting Gerard’s face to look at him. Gerard’s eyes had adjusted enough to see Frank’s face in the dim lighting and he was beautiful. He was everything Gerard could ever want for himself but did he deserve him? After everything that had happened, Gerard was used up, he wasn’t beautiful, and he was unattractive, why would Frank want someone like him? 

“Gerard,” Frank whispered and let his thumb gently brush over Gerard’s cheek. “I love you,” he whispered softly.

Those words, they hit Gerard hard, making him feel like part of his heart had burst on impact and the warm blood was now soaking over his insides. He cried harder and shook his head before he leaned his face down to Frank’s chest. 

“You can’t love me,” Gerard whimpered and sniffed. “I’m not good for you, Frank. I...I love you too much to let you do this. To let you...care for someone like me. I’m so worthless, don’t you see that? I don’t even deserve to hear you speak kind words to me. You’re this amazing person who’s done so much in their life and has so much to live for, don’t throw that away. Don’t give yourself to a person like me who’s been...beaten...and-and raped, and...who doesn’t even deserve...who can’t even...who’s not…,” and Gerard lost himself, lost everything. He couldn’t think straight because he was overwhelmed by how pitiful he was in the eyes of someone like Frank. 

“Hey,” Frank cooed gently to Gerard who was sobbing against him and when Frank reach out to gently pet Gerard’s hair, the younger boy pulled away from him. Seemed like the touch hurt him. 

“Please...I’m not...I’m not worth it,” Gerard whimpered before he sat himself up and let his legs hang over the bed. He hung his head and turned his face away from Frank who sat up beside him.

“Gerard, I’m going to tell you...about...about my life,” Frank said, gripping his hands together tight so that he wouldn’t reach out for Gerard like he wanted to. He hoped telling Gerard his story would make him understand that Gerard was just as good as Frank, if not better.

“My mom...my mom was a prostitute,” Frank said quietly before he swallowed, he’d never told his story before but he knew Gerard needed to hear it, to understand. Gerard’s head seemed to lean his way a little more and the crying wasn’t as loud. “When she was 15 she got pregnant with me,” Frank said quietly, looking to the floor. “She...She didn’t have money, she’d been selling herself before she even got pregnant with me. She was going to have an abortion…,” Frank muttered quietly and contemplated his own existence for a second. 

Gerard had now quieted mostly besides his occasional sniffle and was looking towards Frank from under his hair, listening to his story completely, he’d never known this all about Frank. 

“But she uh...She didn’t,” he said, clearing his throat quietly. “She carried me to term and had continued working through her pregnancy, saving up to get a place and things for me,” he said as his eyes spilled over at the memory of his mother. 

“She was really great,” Frank said with this big smile but still with tears in his eyes and it was like Gerard could feel Frank’s pain in his own chest and it made him reach out and gently take one of Frank’s hands, holding it. 

“I remembered...being Mikey’s age and not understanding everything. People would tell me my mother was trash and I couldn’t understand it. My mother was this amazing person to me,” he said quietly and he bit his lips. He paused for a good moment and Gerard scooted himself closer to him. 

“I didn’t know...that she was sick. She had contracted HIV and she...she didn’t tell me til I was fourteen,” Frank said, keeping his eyes to the floor. “Because, at that point, the doctors had given her a year to live,” Frank said before he bit down on his lip. “My mom...she died the day before my fifteenth birthday,” Frank said quietly and his eyes leaked over again. “She’d only lived five months after she had told me,” he said before sighing heavily, like he was trying to force the sadness from his throat. 

“Burying her, took everything we had...I had. I was fifteen, out on the streets, I had nothing,” Frank said quietly. This was something Gerard had never pictured. Gerard had only seen Frank’s life as one of splendor. Like he’d lived his whole life as some rich kid, spoiled with every little thing he could ever want. 

“So I began to sell myself for money. I got a bad drug habit...I almost overdosed...twice. It got to the point I’d sleep with someone for any amount of money for my fix. Then...a lady came around one day, started talking about getting better, about a rehab facility that would take me in for free. I ignored her for a few months but...I hit rock bottom. Someone had tried to kill me instead of paying up and...I went. I got clean and I went back out on the streets again,” Frank said quietly. 

Gerard couldn’t believe all that he was hearing. Frank had been just like him once, Frank understood what he’d gone through, what he was going through. Even worse in some aspects. This also gave him hope. He wanted to believe he could be someone like Frank one day too. Someone people respected and liked. 

“When I was eighteen, almost nineteen someone told me they had been sent by my father,” Frank said, rolling his eyes even now. “Turns out my father had known about me my whole life and had chosen to go nowhere near me. He was some big hotshot that owned the hospital in town. He left me everything and in his letter to me he had put, “I’m sorry but you understand why I couldn’t claim you in life. I hope this makes up for it.” Frank snorted. “He left me completely alone in the world and thought money would make up for it,” Frank said and his eyes watered and he almost seemed mad. “How can…,” he just cut off and shook his head. 

“Then I met you,” Frank said and looked at Gerard. “You’re this amazing person who keeps his brother safe and who loves him so much. I could never let anything happen to you because Mikey needs you. Because I need you. Gerard, I’m so in love with you,” he whispered. 

Gerard looked up at Frank through his watery eyes and leaned his forehead to Frank’s. He closed his eyes gently and nuzzled into Frank’s cheek before he kissed it. “I’m in love with you too.” 

Frank gently pressed his lips forward until they gently touched Gerard’s and he felt them kiss him back. They both gently laid back in the bed and kissed, pressing close to one another and feeling the other ones skin. 

“I...I don’t feel comfortable,” Gerard said after a moment and pulled away a little. Frank retracted his hands from Gerard but kept in the same spot. 

“What’s wrong?” He asked worriedly. 

“Isn’t Mikey in here?” Gerard asked quietly. 

“Oh, no. He laid down with Chrystal so we could talk when you got home,” Frank said quietly and then gently rubbed Gerard’s side. “Come on, let’s get you laid down.” He whispered and got up pulling down the blankets for Gerard and he helped him crawl in under them before he laid behind him and snuggled up to him. “Is this okay?” Frank asked quietly as he draped his arm over Gerard’s waist. 

Gerard couldn’t help but think of how perfect everything felt in this moment, things were okay for once. Things felt better now that Frank was here, like all the bad had been pushed away by Frank’s presence. “Yeah,” Gerard whispered quietly before he closed his eyes and snuggled into his pillow. He felt Frank press a gentle kiss onto the back of his neck and he realized this was all he ever wanted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO SORRY! Going to be working on getting this finished. Last year was crazy. Things are quiet now!


	40. Chapter 40

The Way brother’s weren’t the same people anymore. Frank could tell this after only a day. Gerard had woken him in the middle of the night by making noises in his sleep. He had sounded distressed so Frank had tried to wake him. He had gently shook him and cradled him in his arms, trying to shush him as he cried out. Gerard had awoken and knocked Frank in the face so hard, he had landed on the floor and split his lip. Gerard didn’t go to Frank either, he curled up in the corner of the bed and rocked, crying quietly. Frank had picked himself up and tried to hold Gerard. Gerard only squirmed away from him and whined. “No, don’t touch me,” he had breathed and it had broken Frank’s heart but he kept away from him. 

When Frank had awoken the next morning, Gerard was asleep out in the living room. He didn’t understand why Gerard didn’t want to be near him. Mikey had quietly come out and ate his breakfast that Chrystal had made but really didn’t talk, besides thanking her and saying morning to Frank. 

Frank had asked if Mikey wanted to go to the park today, hoping for an excited face that he would have normally got but Mikey only shook his head. 

“It’s too cold,” he said quietly, blandly as he looked at his cereal. 

“But we could build a snow fort and play tag with the other kids,” Frank said, trying to get him excited. 

“I have chemo today,” Mikey said with a bored tone and continued to look at his bowl. 

“Oh, okay,” Frank said quietly with a small, sad smile. “I could take you so your brother can sleep,” Frank suggested, just wanting to spend some time with Mikey.

“No, thank you. I don’t want you to take me,” Mikey said before he got up from the table and walked over to Gerard, shaking him. “Doctor’s soon,” was all Mikey said before he walked off to get dressed.

They were reverting back, Frank could see it plain as day. They were trusting nobody but themselves. Frank had hoped that their reaction to him would last and that they would love him. He could see now they felt distant from him, even after everything. He looked to Chrystal who sadly smiled at him. 

Gerard woke up and smiled tiredly at Chrystal before he walked by Frank like he wasn’t even there. Frank looked to Chrystal and she frowned. “I don’t know, baby,” she said quietly. It was truly beyond her thinking but she knew the brother’s had been wounded. They weren’t going to bounce back from their abuse quickly. Chrystal had had a boyfriend before who only hit her, never raped her and she hadn’t trusted anyone after that for a very long time. She knew abuse made your skin tough and your mind skeptical and guarded. You wanted to be protected and loved but you could barely feel like it was genuine. Everything always seemed like a scheme once you’d been abused. Everything was a ploy to pull you in further and hurt you more. Chrystal couldn’t even imagine how dark things were in Gerard and Mikey’s minds. 

Gerard and Mikey came out of their room a little bit later, both dressed and with jackets on. Gerard told Chrystal they’d be back in a few hours and then went for the door. 

“Hey, I can drive you…,” Frank began as they opened the door. “Since it’s cold,” he mentioned, motioning to Mikey. Gerard looked at him for a moment before he looked down to Mikey and back again. 

“No, thank you. We can catch the bus. I have some errands to run anyways,” he said quietly and seemed to sadly look down. 

“I wouldn’t mind taking-,” Frank began but was soon cut off.

“No, that’s fine. Thanks though,” Gerard said quickly before he closed the door and him and Mikey were gone. 

There was an awkward silence in the air for a moment as Frank stared at the door where Mikey and Gerard had disappeared. Chrystal sighed sadly before she walked over to Frank and hugged him.

“They’re going to come around, baby. I promise,” she said quietly, feeling him wrap his arms around her.

* * *

“Gerard?” Mikey asked quietly as he sat in his hospital chair, his arm hooked up to his machine. His older brother hummed quietly and looked to him. “Do you think...Would Frank hurt us like...like Jason did?” 

Gerard looked down for a moment and swallowed. He’d been contemplating this thought all morning. He didn’t think Frank would but he hadn’t thought Jason would have either. In the beginning, Jason had been sweet, dreamy, and he fucked Gerard like he was his everything. Gerard shuddered at the thought now, feeling dirty for remembering back to those times they had shared. Things had seemed perfect before they had slowly gone downhill. Would things with Frank be the same? Gerard didn’t want to think that way about Frank but people had never stopped amazing him with their cruelty. Everyone wanted one thing, for Gerard to blow them and then to treat him like dirt. 

Gerard looked to his little brother, this was an important moment in Mikey’s life and Gerard didn’t want to fuck it up. Anything he said to his little brother right now bared consequences in the future. If he told Mikey no and something happened, he would never forgive himself. If he told Mikey he could or to be careful around Frank, his little brother may never fully trust another person again. 

“Mikey,” Gerard said softly and then licked his lip, thinking of his wording. “Sometimes, there are bad people and sometimes...there are good people. The problem is, sometimes bad people pretend they’re good people.” He was trying to focus on his word, not say anything wrong. 

“So is Frank a bad person, pretending to be a good person?” Mikey bit his bottom lip and searched his brother’s face. 

“I don’t know, Mikey,” Gerard whispered sadly and looked down. 

“But I want to know,” Mikey said sadly. “I like Frank and I want him to be a good person.” Mikey felt so torn and he just looked down. He loved Frank, he wanted to feel safe with him. He wanted to trust him but he couldn’t be hurt again, he felt so broken and betrayed. 

“I’ll figure it out…,’ Gerard said, seeing his little brother so saddened. Mikey seemed to perk up to this idea. Gerard knew he would need to test Frank, to figure this out early on. He would not drag his little brother through another nightmare, he refused.

“All done,” a nurse said with a smile, walking up to them both. “Let’s get you out of here.”

* * *

Chrystal was sitting down at her table with Mikey as they both ate and was wondering why Gerard was spending so much time in the bedroom. Eventually the door creaked open and her head shot up, she wanted some sort of explanation for his disappearance. Gerard walked out looking like straight sex. His outfit was tight and hugged his entire body and he had done a little bit of makeup, accentuating his face. 

“Are you working tonight?” Chrystal asked a little confused. The outfit didn’t quite seem like one he’d wear on the street. Most outfits for work were a little looser, only to make it easier for people to pull things down and off. Fucking in an alleyway needed to be done quickly, tight clothes did not help that. 

“I’m going out,” Gerard said to her before he kissed the top of Mikey’s forehead, pulling his beanie back a little. “I have a date,” he muttered quietly. 

“A date?!” Chrystal hadn’t meant to jump on the comment so fast but it was already done. Gerard looked at her with his eyebrows raised. “I just...you haven’t really seemed up for that… I thought,” she cleared her throat and glanced between the two brother’s. “Are you sure you’re ready?” 

She was only concerned for him. She didn’t want him rushing himself out there and getting hurt or upset again. She had seen how he had pushed Frank away that morning and it made her feel like he really wasn’t ready. She stood up and gently touched Gerard’s arm, guiding him away from Mikey.

“Gerard,” she said hushed so Mikey wouldn’t hear. “Don’t you think it’s too soon? Also...what about Frank?” She said Gerard look into her eyes and she swallowed a little, trying to get the courage to confront him like a friend. “You two love each other. Why would you go out with someone else?” 

Gerard seemed unbothered by her words. “I’m going to meet Frank,” he said with a small smile. He was going to meet him, Gerard was sure of this. Frank didn’t know about their little _date but that was how Gerard wanted it to be._

_“Oh,” Chrystal said, stepping back a little, surprised. “Oh, that’s great,” she said excitedly as she really took in what Gerard had told her. “I’m so happy you’re giving him a chance,” she said genuinely._

_“Well…,” Gerard said with an awkward smile and backed up to the door. “I better get going, don’t wanna be late.” Gerard waved to Mikey. “I love you.”_

_“I love you too,” Mikey said quietly. “Be safe, Gee.”_

_“Always,” Gerard said with a small, sad smile before walking out the door. He sighed once the door was closed and then straightened himself up. He needed to get it together, to prepare himself for the night ahead._


End file.
